by J. Kenner
The world outside the car is lined with traps, and if I'm not careful, I'll be sucked in. Destroyed by the darkness that hides behind the false facades of these stately houses. Surrounded not by a bright children's tale, but by a horror movie, lured in by the promise of beauty and then trapped forever and slowly destroyed, ripped to pieces by the monsters in the dark.
Breathe, I tell myself. You can do this. You just have to remember to breathe.
"Nikki. Nikki."
Damien's voice startles me back to reality, and I jerk upright, calling upon perfect posture to ward off the ghosts of my memories.
His tone is soft, profoundly gentle, but when I glance toward him, I see that his eyes have dipped to my lap.
For a moment, I'm confused, then I realize that I've inched up my skirt, and my fingertip is slowly tracing the violent scar that mars my inner thigh. A souvenir of the deep, ugly wound that I inflicted upon myself a decade ago when I was desperate to find a way to release all the pent-up anger and fear and pain that swirled inside me like a phalanx of demons.
I yank my hand away, then turn to look out the window, feeling oddly, stupidly ashamed.
He says nothing, but the car moves to the curb and then rolls to a stop. A moment later, Damien's fingers twine with mine. I hold tight, drawing strength, and when I shift to look at him more directly, I see worry etched in the hard angles of that perfect face and reflected in those exceptional, dual-colored eyes.
Worry, yes. But it is the rest of what I see that takes my breath away. Understanding. Support. Respect.
Most of all, I see a love so fierce it has the power to melt me, and I revel in its power to soothe.
He is the biggest miracle of my life, and there are moments when I still can't believe that he is mine.
Damien Stark. My husband, my lover, my best friend. A man who commands an empire with a firm, controlling hand. Who takes orders from no one, and yet today is playing chauffeur so that he can stand beside me while I confront my past.
For a moment, I simply soak him in. His strength, apparent in both his commanding manner and the long, lean lines of his athletic body. His support reflected in those eyes that see me so intimately. That have, over the years, learned all my secrets.
Damien knows every scar on my body, as well as the story behind each. He knows the depth of my pain, and he knows how far I have come. How far his love has helped me come.
Most of all, he knows what it has cost me to return to Texas. To drive these streets. To look out at this neighborhood so full of pain and dark memories.
With a small shiver, I pull my hand free so that I can hug myself.
"Oh, baby." The concern in his voice is so thick I can almost grab hold of it. "Nikki, you don't have to do this."
"I do." My words sound ragged, my throat too clogged with unshed tears to speak normally.
"Sweetheart--"
I wait, expecting him to continue, but he's gone silent. I see the tension on his face, as if he's uncertain what to say or how to say it--but Damien Stark is never unsure. Not about business. Not about himself. Not about me.
And yet right now he's hesitating. Treating me like I'm something fragile and breakable.
An unexpected shock of anger cuts through me. Not at him, but at myself. Because, dammit, he's right. In this moment, I'm as fragile as I've ever been, and that's not a pleasant realization. I've fought so hard to be strong, and with Damien at my side, I've succeeded.
But here I am, all my hard work shot to hell simply because I've returned to my hometown.
"You think coming here is a mistake." I snap the words at him, but it's not Damien I'm irritated with, it's me.
"No." He doesn't hesitate, and I take some comfort in the speed and certainty of his response. "But I do wonder if now is the right time. Maybe tomorrow would be better. After your meetings."
We've come to Texas not so that I can torture myself by driving through my old neighborhood to visit my estranged mother, but because I'm vying to land a contract with one of the top web development companies in the country. It's looking to roll out a series of apps, both for internal use among its employees and externally for its clients.
I'd submitted a proposal and am now one of only five companies invited to come to Dallas to pitch, and my little company is by far the smallest and the newest. I suspect, of course, that part of the reason I got the invitation is because I'm married to Damien Stark, and because my company has already licensed software to Stark International.
A year ago, that would have bothered me.
Not anymore. I'm damn good at what I do, and if my last name gets me a foot in the door, then so be it. I don't care how the opportunity comes because I know that my work is top-notch, and if I get the job, it will be on the merits of my proposal and my presentation.
It's a huge opportunity, and one I don't want to screw up. Especially since my goal for the next eighteen months is to build up my receivables, hire five employees, and take over the full floor of the building that houses my office condo.
I'd worked on my business plan for months, and was a complete nervous wreck the night I handed it to my master of the universe, brilliantly entrepreneurial husband for review. When he'd given it the Damien Stark seal of approval, I practically collapsed with relief. My plan to grow my business doesn't hinge on me getting this job--but landing it will mean I can bump all my target dates up by six months. More importantly, winning this contract will put my business firmly on the competitive map.
My shoulders sag a bit as I meet his eyes. "You're afraid that seeing Mother is going to throw me off my game. That I'll flub tomorrow's meetings and hurt my chances of landing the contract."
"I want you at your best."
"I know you do," I say sincerely, because Damien has never been anything but supportive. "Don't you get it? That's why we're here. It's like a preemptive strike."
His brow furrows, but before he can ask what I mean, I rush to explain. "Just being in Dallas messes with my head--we both know that. She haunts this town. And having you here with me now makes it so much better. But you can't always be with me, and before I make my pitch, I need to be certain that I can travel back and forth between LA and Dallas without being afraid I'll see her around every corner."
The pathetic truth is that lately I've been seeing my mother around all sorts of corners. I've imagined seeing her in Beverly Hills shopping centers. On Malibu beaches. In crowded streets. At charity events. I have no idea why this woman I've worked so hard to block from my mind is suddenly at the forefront of my imagination, but she is.
And I really don't want her there.
I draw a breath, hoping he understands. "I need to lay all these demons to rest and just do my work. Please," I add, my voice imploring. "Please tell me you understand."
"I do," he says, then takes my hand and gently kisses my fingertips. As he does, his phone rings. It's sitting on the console, and I can see that the caller is his attorney, Charles Maynard.
"Don't you need to take it?" I ask, as he scowls, then declines the call.
"It can wait."
There's a hard edge to his voice, and I wonder what he's not telling me. Not that Damien keeps me informed about every aspect of his business--considering he pretty much owns and operates the entire planet and a few distant solar systems, that would require far too many updates--but he does tend to keep me in the loop on things that are troubling him.
I frown. It's clear that he's not telling me because I already have plenty on my mind. And while I appreciate the sentiment, I don't like that--once again--my mother has come between my husband and me.
"You should call him back," I say. "If he's calling on a Sunday, it must be important . . ."
I let the words trail away, hoping to give him an opening, but all he does is shake his head. "Don't worry about it," he says, even as his phone signals an incoming text.
He snatches it up, but not before I see Charles's name flash on the lock screen again, this time wi
th a single word: Urgent.
Damien meets my eyes, and for just a moment his frustration is almost comical. Then he snatches up the phone and hits the button to call Charles. A second later, he's saying, "Dammit, I told you I can't be bothered with this right now."
He listens to the response, the furrows in his brow growing deeper. Finally, he sighs, looking more frustrated than I've seen him in a long time.
Cold foreboding washes over me. Damien isn't the kind of man who gets frustrated over business deals. On the contrary, the harder and more challenging the deal, the more he thrives.
Which means this is personal.
"I hear you, Charles, but I'm not paying you for your advice on this. I'm paying you for those resources you're so keen on touting. So use them, dammit. Pull out all the stops and get me some answers by the time I'm back in LA. Fine," he adds after another pause. "Call me if you have something definitive. Otherwise I'll see you in a couple of days."
He ends the call and slams the phone back down. I open my mouth, intending to ask him what's happening, but before I get the chance, he pulls me roughly to him and closes his mouth over mine. The kiss is hard, brutal, and I slide closer, losing myself in the wildness. And for this moment at least, I forget my apprehension and his problems. There is nothing but us, our passion a raging blaze that clears away the debris of our lives, stripping us to the bone until there is nothing left but the two of us.
I'm breathing hard when we break apart, my lips bruised and tingling, my body burning. I want to turn around and go back to the hotel. I want to strip off my clothes and feel his hands on me, his cock inside me. I want it wild. Raw. Pain and pleasure so intense I get lost in them. Passion so violent it breaks me. And Damien--always Damien--right there to put me back together again.
On behalf of 1001 Dark Nights,
Liz Berry and M.J. Rose would like to thank ~
Steve Berry
Doug Scofield
Kim Guidroz
Jillian Stein
InkSlinger PR
Dan Slater
Asha Hossain
Chris Graham
Pamela Jamison
Fedora Chen
Jessica Johns
Dylan Stockton
Richard Blake
BookTrib After Dark
and Simon Lipskar
