by A. K. Evans
Even though I hadn’t used it, I quickly flushed the toilet and ran the water in the sink for a few seconds. After I turned it off, I took a couple of deep breaths, put my hand to the doorknob, and walked out.
High-pitched laughter filled my ears, forcing me to look to the left. Roscoe’s girlfriend. Lovely. And he was right behind her, pulling his shirt down over his head.
Yep.
He was definitely doing things that could be deemed inappropriate for the guests downstairs.
“Oh, hey,” Roscoe’s girlfriend said. “We didn’t know anyone else was up here.”
I forced a smile. “The downstairs bathroom was occupied,” I shared.
“That’s okay. I love your swimsuit, by the way,” she replied.
Great.
Now I hated her even more. She was being nice.
My eyes slid to the side, where I noticed Roscoe in deep thought.
“Thanks,” I murmured after returning my eyes to his girlfriend.
“Maria, this is Addy’s friend, Sienna,” Roscoe chimed in. “Sienna, this is Maria.”
Hearing him say my name made my heart pound wildly in my chest. I hated that I was affected by him like that.
I faked another smile and said, “It’s nice to meet you.”
“You too, Sienna. We’ll catch you later.”
I nodded as she turned to walk off. Roscoe stood there a moment longer, looked at me, and urged, “You should probably head back downstairs with the rest of the kids.”
Kids?
I wanted to die right there.
It all made sense now. Roscoe didn’t see me as anything more than Addy’s best friend. I was merely a kid who hung out at his house more than he probably cared to admit.
In all fairness, he had just turned twenty, so I guess to him I was nothing more than a kid.
But boy, did it hurt to hear him say that.
My throat was painfully tight. Somehow, I managed to open my mouth and speak in spite of it.
“Right,” I rasped. As my eyes dropped away from his face and to the ground, I whispered, “Later.”
I took off right away and made my way down the stairs. Once I’d rejoined the party, I made a valiant effort to stick to the crowd from that point forward. Then again, I wasn’t sure I needed to try so hard because I never saw Roscoe the rest of the day.
And when I went back to Addy’s house for a sleepover two weeks later, I learned that Roscoe had moved out and into his own apartment.
Sadly, that made me even more devastated.
But I knew I was going to need to get past it. I had a crush on a guy who didn’t even seem to know I existed.
And considering it wasn’t much later when Roscoe’s band made it big, I realized that not being around him was the best thing for me. At least then I wouldn’t feel so lousy, and I’d have a fighting chance to move on and find someone who thought I was spectacular.
Two
Sienna
Present Day
This was going to be the most difficult day of my life.
At least, it would be up to this point.
My best friend was getting married. Addison had fallen in love with a man named Tyler, and he was completely head-over-heels for her. It should have been a joyous occasion, and it was. I couldn’t have been happier for the both of them. But my biggest worry at this point should have been whether or not I’d packed all the extras of things Addy might need to make it through her big day.
None of that was on my mind. I’d taken care of everything long before today, long before this moment.
I was mere seconds away from seeing him again. It had been years since I last saw Roscoe in person, and I was terrified of how it would be. Of course, I had seen him. The guy was a major rock star now, so I’d have to have been living in a cave or on some remote island somewhere to not know what he looked like and how he had been doing.
But I was convinced that seeing him in the flesh again would be absolutely catastrophic for me. I wasn’t prepared for this.
Because not only was I going to see him for the first time, but I was also going to have to stand close, touch him, and probably even talk with him. We were both in the wedding party along with the groom’s sister and his best friend.
Roscoe and I hadn’t spoken to each other once since that day at Addy’s birthday party when she turned fifteen and Roscoe indicated he saw me as nothing more than just a kid. Ever since that day, I made it a point not to be somewhere that I knew he’d be. It wasn’t that hard to do after he moved out of his parents’ house. And with the success of the band and the amount of touring they’d been doing, he ended up missing a lot of the festivities that both of us would have normally been at.
Over the years, I managed to stuff my crush somewhere deep in my heart and ignore it. I did my best to move on. I even dated a couple of guys. Two of those guys ended up being serious relationships. I had been with the first guy for about eighteen months before we realized we just weren’t meant for one another. The second relationship had been much longer. We were together for three and a half years, and I started to think that perhaps he was the one I’d end up marrying. But he came to me one day and told me he needed to end things because he had fallen in love with one of his coworkers.
So, following that ordeal, after giving up so much of my life to a man who could do that to me, I just took a break from getting into anything serious. That relationship had ended four years ago.
Given the fact that I didn’t have a steady boyfriend right now and that it had been a long time since I’d been with someone, I wasn’t sure how I was going to hold up against someone like Roscoe.
Because even though I’d done everything I could over the years to avoid coming into direct contact with Roscoe, it didn’t mean that one look at the man couldn’t still send my heart racing. Even after he’d crushed my heart all those years ago—albeit unintentionally—I still admired him in secret and from afar.
That was going to end today, and I had a feeling it wasn’t going to be easy.
Before allowing myself to get too caught up in what I was mere moments away from facing, I had one thing I needed to do.
I turned around, looked at Addison, and smiled at her. “I’m so happy for you,” I told her. “You’re the most beautiful bride in the world, and I can’t wait to see you marry the man of your dreams.”
Addy lowered her flowers, and tears formed in her eyes. I quickly sprang into action, pulled out a white handkerchief I’d tucked into my palm carrying my bouquet, and held it out to her.
“Don’t mess your makeup!” I ordered.
She tipped her head back slightly, dabbed at the corners of her eyes, and took a few deep breaths. As soon as she pulled herself together, she said, “It means the world to me that you’re standing by my side today, Sienna. I don’t know what I’d do without you in my life.”
“There’s nowhere else I’d rather be today,” I assured her. “And you know that I’m always going to be here for you.”
A proud look washed over her face. “I can’t wait to do the same for you.”
I didn’t want to tell her that I wasn’t sure marriage was going to happen for me. She didn’t need to be worrying about the sad state of my heart on the most special day of her life. We’d talk about my nonexistent love life another time… maybe after she got back from her honeymoon.
At that moment, I heard the organ inside the church start playing. It was time.
“You ready?” I asked.
She smiled and nodded. “Yes.”
“Love you, Addy.”
“Love you, too, Sienna.”
With that, I turned around and took a deep breath. This was it. No looking back, no running away, and certainly no hiding. I simply repeated the plan I’d come up over and over in my head.
Do not look at him.
Easy. Simple.
Considering the size of the wedding, it shouldn’t be a problem.
The doors that led into the church
opened and following the flower girls—Addy and Tyler both had young cousins—Tyler’s sister began her walk down the aisle.
I kept my eyes focused on her, on what was happening directly in front of me. When it was my turn to go, my gaze remained fixated on Tyler’s sister. I didn’t look at the guests. I didn’t look at Addy’s mom. I didn’t even look at the groom.
But then I thought that I should at least give Tyler a glance. He was the groom, and I loved him for my friend. He should know how happy I was for him.
So, I did that. I looked at him and smiled.
And just as he returned that smile, my gaze slid to his side. They locked on Roscoe.
Shit.
I didn’t know how I didn’t fall over as I continued to make my way down the aisle because the man took my breath away. There was no way I could do this. I would never survive the night. Not only because I’d been suppressing just how much I adored him, but also because he was looking at me in a way he had never looked at me before.
I forced myself to look away from him, focused my effort on getting to the end of the aisle, and took my spot beside where Addy would eventually be standing. Once I was there, the organ stopped for a matter of seconds before a new song started again.
The entire congregation stood and watched as Addy was led down the aisle on her father’s arm. By the time she made it to the front of the church beside her groom, I let my guard down and glanced in Roscoe’s direction. He was still looking at me in a way I didn’t think was appropriate for any man to be looking at any woman inside a church.
I quickly looked away from him and made a promise to myself to not look at him again for at least the remainder of the ceremony. And because it was my best friend’s wedding and what was arguably the most important day of her life, it wasn’t exactly difficult to do.
Before I knew it, Tyler was being told he could kiss his bride. That meant my nerves went through the roof. Because now I’d need to come into direct contact with Roscoe so we could exit the church together.
Nervous didn’t even begin to describe how I was feeling.
As Addy and Tyler turned and began their walk down the aisle, my eyes met Roscoe’s again. His were intense as he stepped forward and held out his arm for me. Despite all that I was feeling inside, regardless of how much I wanted to hesitate longer, I knew I couldn’t. I moved toward him, slid my arm through his, and curled my fingers around his bicep.
His solid, muscular bicep.
Suffice it to say that Roscoe was still in phenomenal shape. He’d put on some bulk over the years, but he was no less handsome or breathtaking.
The moment we made it to the end of the aisle and exited the church, I was keen on pulling my hand from his arm. But before I could do that, Roscoe’s opposite hand curled around my fingers and held me there.
After I looked down at his hand, I brought my attention to his face. He smiled at me and said, “Look at you. You’re all grown up now, Sienna.”
Of course, I was.
It had been more than fifteen years. Did he think I’d remain a teenage girl for the rest of my life?
I wanted to throw an attitude at him, but this wasn’t the time or the place. And I couldn’t exactly say that he was being a total jerk.
So, I replied, “I am. Looks like you’ve done some growing up, too.”
“It’s been a long time since I last saw you,” he declared.
I didn’t know why he was telling me that. Obviously, I already knew how long it had been. I’d been purposely avoiding him whenever it was necessary.
“Yes, it has been. You’re obviously doing very well,” I returned.
He nodded and smiled. “Yeah. And you? How have you been?” he asked.
“I’ve been great,” I lied.
I mean, it wasn’t a total lie. I wasn’t exactly in some awful situation, but compared to him, my life was nothing extraordinary. I was simply a woman who worked hard every day to pay her bills, survive, and have a little bit of fun every now and then.
“That’s good to hear,” Roscoe said.
“Sienna! Roscoe!” Addy’s voice called out. We both looked to the side just in time to see Addy waving at us. “Come on. We’ve got to get in the limo to go take pictures before the wedding reception.”
I looked back at Roscoe. He let go of my fingers and allowed me to remove my hand from his bicep.
I was immediately grateful for the distance because the scent of him was almost too much for me to remain immune to. Of course, Roscoe used that opportunity to place his hand at the small of my back and guide me forward. Shivers ran up and down my spine.
For the next hour or so, I was doing everything in my power to remain strong. Some of the awkward tension I felt between Roscoe and me was gone, since we were now in the presence of the rest of the bridal party. There was no doubt in my mind that we wouldn’t have gotten to this place if we’d been in our own car.
But even being around the others, I was still battling with everything I felt inside. Standing beside him for pictures, smelling the incredibly tantalizing scent of him, and feeling his fingers brush tenderly across my skin was making it nearly impossible to remain composed.
I was slowly losing the war, and I wasn’t sure there was anything I could do to stop it from happening.
It was only when we were finally at the reception that I thought there’d be a chance to recover. We needed to dance together at least once as members of the bridal party, but I was certain that by the time we were seated for dinner and the party got in full swing, Roscoe would move on from driving me crazy.
The bridal party was introduced, Addy and Tyler had their first dance, and then it was our turn. Roscoe took me by the hand, led me out onto the dancefloor, and held me in his arms. He hadn’t even said a word, and my body was reacting.
Standing this close to him, his arms around me, and the front of his body pressed tight against mine… I couldn’t stop my body from buzzing to life.
Thankfully, Roscoe didn’t try to make things more awkward. In fact, when he spoke, it helped to ease all the tension I felt.
“You know, I’m really glad to see after all these years that you’re still here for Addy,” he said.
I tipped my head to the side and smiled. “I love her,” I informed him. “She’s my best friend in the whole world.”
He nodded. “I know. I love that she has someone like you in her life, someone who’s been by her side through it all.”
“She’s done the same for me,” I shared. “Except I don’t know what I’m going to do for the next six months without her.”
Roscoe offered a sympathetic look. “Sorry about that,” he lamented.
As it turned out, Roscoe was a generous man, especially when it came to his family. He knew how much Addy had wanted to travel around the world for her honeymoon. She and Tyler had saved up enough money to be able to take a month-long honeymoon and visit the most important places on their bucket list. But when Roscoe found out that she wasn’t going to be able to see all that she wanted to see—some of the places being spots he’d been to while on tour—he stepped up to the plate and offered to pay for their honeymoon.
Roughly six months of traveling.
“Don’t apologize,” I ordered. “She deserves it. I love it for her. I just hate it for me. She knows how much I’m going to miss her, but I made her promise she won’t call me while she’s away. I want her to enjoy her time with her new husband because she’s never going to get that time back.”
Roscoe’s fingers tightened around my waist. “That’s really cool of you to do,” he noted.
I shrugged. “She’d do the same for me.”
A strange look washed over Roscoe’s face. As quickly as it was there, it was gone, and a moment later, he asked, “Is that something she’s going to get the chance to do any time soon?”
My brows shot up, silently questioning him. When he didn’t clarify, I countered, “Are you asking if I’m planning to get married in the near future?
”
His lips twitched. “Are you?”
I wanted to ask him how he would feel if I said I was, but I’d already been crushed by his words once. I wasn’t a glutton for punishment.
So, I shared, “I think you have to at least be dating someone first before you can get married. Since that’s not the case for me, I’m going to say that Addy can go on her honeymoon without having to worry about rushing back. There’s no wedding on the horizon.”
“Are you disappointed about that?” he wondered.
“I’m turning thirty-one in a few months, Roscoe,” I started. “I’m not crying about it, but I’m certainly not thrilled that I’m alone, either. Let’s just say I thought my life would have turned out a lot differently than it did.”
“Did something bad happen?” he pressed.
Shaking my head, I answered, “Nothing more than anybody else has experienced in their life. We all have good days and bad days, right?”
Roscoe shot me a look that indicated he didn’t experience very many bad days, if at all. But then he nearly knocked me off my feet when he said, “Well, I’d like to do what I can to see to it that you have a good day today and an even better night tonight.”
My lips parted in shock. For the first time all day, I was relieved that Roscoe was holding me close to him. Because at that declaration, I surely would have fallen over otherwise.
“Breathe, Sienna,” he urged quietly.
Damn. I loved the way it felt to hear him say my name.
I did as he instructed and started to breathe.
He smiled. “Good girl. Now, are you going to let me give you a good night?”
Was he crazy? Did he think I’d ever turn him down?
Maybe a sane person would have done that, but I never claimed to be anything but crazy when it came to how I felt about Roscoe.
I’d crushed on the man for years, even if I never believed he’d even give me a second glance. Now he wanted to give me a good night. Maybe it was stupid, especially because I knew he’d never want something serious with me, but there was no way I wasn’t going to let him give me precisely what he wanted.
