by Cat Clarke
Another slurp of milkshake. ‘Now I’m pretty sure I’d remember if I’d arranged to do something like that.’
Sal was a slightly tougher nut to crack. It was obvious that she wasn’t up for it, but I wore her down, countering every reason she gave for not coming with us. It was over in a matter of minutes.
Eventually she sighed. ‘You’re impossible when you get like this! You’re not going to take no for an answer, are you?’
I laughed. ‘Ah, you know me so well! So that’s settled then. You can come round to mine to get ready beforehand, and then we can meet Nat at the station. Maybe we should get a couple of cans to drink on the way? Shit … what am I gonna wear? What are you gonna wear? We’ll have to make sure we look completely awesome. I bet there will be lots of fit boys there. Maybe you’ll—’
‘Grace …’ The warning in her voice was clear.
‘But—’
‘But nothing! You’d better promise right now, or I’m not going.’
I sighed in melodramatic fashion. ‘I promise. But I can’t say the same for Nat – he might have a lonely, unbelievably gorgeous friend in mind for you.’
‘He won’t,’ she said quietly.
‘Nah, course he won’t! All the friends I’ve heard him talk about are girls anyway, so the odds aren’t in your favour.’ I laughed. Sal did not.
When Sal arrived on Monday, my bed was buried underneath a mountain of clothes and I was standing there in my jeans and bra, hands on hips.
‘What’s up?’
‘I have NOTHING to wear. Nothing! Not one thing! This is hopeless.’
‘Calm down. You’ve got loads of clothes.’
‘Yeah, but nothing’s right!’
Sal started sorting through the pile I’d discarded, carefully folding things and putting them back in the wardrobe as she went. Before long she’d pulled out a black top and held it up against me. ‘Yup, that’s the one.’
‘That? But it’s so old! And so boring. Don’t you think it’s a bit too casual?’
‘Nope. We’re going to a proper studenty club, remember? Dressing down is the only way to go.’ She rummaged in the drawer of my dressing table and pulled out the purple necklace she’d given me a few months ago. ‘Here. Try it with this.’
Of course she was right – as usual.
‘Thank God you’re here. You’re a lifesaver!’ I said, as I struggled to fasten the necklace in the mirror.
‘Here, let me.’
I checked her out in the mirror as she concentrated on the fastening. She was wearing a lot less make-up than I was, and her hair was in a simple ponytail, which made her look young and sort of innocent. I was slightly worried she might get ID’d, but knew better than to say anything now. She was wearing jeans and a black top too, but we could not have looked more different.
Nat was leaning against the railings at the station when we arrived. This ‘being on time’ thing was becoming a habit. He watched our approach and made a big show of checking his watch.
‘What time do you call this?!’
‘Yeah, yeah, you can blame Sal. She’s almost as incapable of being on time as you are … well, were.’ I kissed him.
Nat said hello to Sal and they shared an awkward hug. I was pleased they didn’t shake hands or anything lame like that. The train was just pulling into the station, so we legged it over the footbridge and made it onto the train just in time. Sal sat opposite me and Nat, and we cracked open the beers Nat had brought. We chatted about this and that and the conversation flowed easily without too much effort from me. I was pleased that despite their initial lack of enthusiasm for the evening, they seemed to be enjoying each other’s company.
‘I like your necklace, Grace. Is it new?’
I beamed at Nat, and then at Sal. ‘Nah, I’ve had it for a while. Sal bought it for me – she has impeccable taste, doesn’t she?’
Nat nodded vaguely and was about to say something when Sal piped up with a change of subject. ‘Grace told me that one of your friends works behind the bar at this place we’re going. Will she be there tonight?’
Nat nodded and swigged his beer. ‘Yeah, Anna will probably be working. We might get a couple of free drinks from her, if we’re lucky.’
‘So, what’s Anna like? Is she on your course’ I wanted to know what I was up against.
Nat shrugged. ‘Yeah, she is. Unbelievably clever – she helped me out a lot with anatomy last year.’
‘Anatomy?’ I couldn’t help but giggle.
‘Grace … how old are you?’ he chided.
‘Sorry. So … does she have a boyfriend?’
Nat shook his head. ‘Nah, she was seeing someone for a bit just before the holidays, but I think she dumped him. Anna isn’t really into relationships – she thinks they’re a waste of time.’ Hmm, don’t like the sound of this one at all. In fact, she sounded suspiciously like the Old Me.
‘Is she pretty?’ I just couldn’t help myself. I glanced over to catch Sal’s eye, but she was staring out of the window.
‘Yeah, I suppose she is. My mates seem to think so anyway.’ Nat clearly hadn’t been reading his How To Be A Perfect Boyfriend handbook. Of course, the answer I was looking for was something along the lines of: ‘I have no idea. Everyone pales into insignificance now that I’m with you.’
‘I’m looking forward to meeting her.’
‘She’ll probably be too busy to talk to us much, so don’t take it personally.’
The rest of the journey passed uneventfully. Nat told us a bit about the bands that were playing. Sal feigned interest even though they didn’t sound like her cup of tea at all. I reminded myself that the quality of the music was irrelevant; tonight was about much more than that.
On the walk from the station to the club I noticed that Nat didn’t hold my hand like he usually did when we were out and about. I thought it was sweet that he obviously didn’t want Sal to feel left out. I resolved to remember not to act too coupley. I was pretty sure I could manage that for a few hours at least.
We had no problems getting into the club, and Nat bought Sal’s ticket, ignoring her protests. He insisted that this was his treat. I patted his bum to show my approval in the most subtle way possible, a gesture he seemed not to notice. The club was a sweaty little dive. The ceiling was low and every visible surface was painted black. Old posters and flyers peeled from the walls. I liked it immediately. The tiny stage was empty for the time being, but the bar was heaving. Sal and I stood behind Nat as he gradually edged his way to the front of the queue. I took the opportunity to check that Sal was fine and dandy. She said that she’d feel a lot better when she’d got a drink in her hand, so it sounded like she was up for getting wasted. I approved wholeheartedly.
Nat waved at a girl behind the bar. As soon as she saw him, she squealed excitedly (I hated her already) and leaned right over the bar to hug him. OK, you can let go now. But she held on for a good few seconds too long. She called to another girl behind the bar to say she was taking her break. The other girl looked pissed off and gestured to the hordes of thirsty customers. Anna (at least I assumed that’s who it was) skipped around the side of the bar without a backwards glance. And then she hugged Nat again, which I thought was entirely unnecessary.
Sal slipped into Nat’s place in the queue and I heard her order three pints from pissed-off bar girl. So I was left standing awkwardly sort of behind Nat while Anna fired questions at him.
‘Dude! Where have you been all summer? Why didn’t you call to let me know you were coming? I could have got you in free. Is Si here too?’ Dude? Do real people actually talk like that? And who on earth is Si? I was certain Nat hadn’t mentioned him. I wasn’t liking this one little bit. I took the opportunity to look Anna up and down. She was pretty, and obviously too cool for school. She wore a ring through her nose and another through her lip. Her features were even, and might have been unremarkable had it not been for her eyes, which were piercingly blue and twinkling at my boyfriend in a way I didn’t f
eel completely comfortable with. Her hair was sort of short and streaky, and messy in that just-got-out-of-bed-but-not-really-this-has-taken-ages way. She wore a black T-shirt with the club’s name on it and she’d cut off the sleeves and knotted it just under her breasts (which were bigger than mine). Her stomach was toned and flat, and her baggy jeans hung carelessly off her hips. A swirly bit of tattoo peeped above her waistband, and I didn’t even want to think about where it might end.
‘Anna! Shut up for a minute! This is Grace …’ I abruptly halted my appraisal and returned my gaze to those laser eyes.
‘Hi, Grace, I’m Anna. Nice to meet you.’ she said, friendly enough.
‘Hi, nice to meet you too.’ We shook hands, and Anna looked at Nat with a question in her eyes.
‘Grace and I have been going out for a couple of months.’
‘Really? You mean this is your girlfriend? Well, well, well! Then it’s doubly nice to meet you.’ Anna winked at me conspiratorially. ‘Just between you and me, I thought he was never going to get a girlfriend. Well, there was that one chick he wouldn’t shut up about, but that was a good few months ago now. God, I thought he was never going to get over her …’
‘Sal! Over here.’ I’d spotted her trying to elbow her way through the growing crowd, doing her best not to spill a drop of beer.
Anna started to say something, but Nat talked right over her to ask her whether she’d done the set reading for the summer. He was sort of a geek, but by the sound of her answer, Anna was too. He took one of the pints from Sal and thanked her, before turning away from us to continue his highly fascinating conversation with Anna. I appreciated not being bored to death with medical terms I didn’t understand. And it gave me the chance to give Sal the lowdown on the situation, along with my thoughts on Anna. After a couple of minutes I noticed Anna looking over Nat’s shoulder, scoping out me and Sal. I guessed their topic of conversation must have taken a turn towards more interesting things – like me.
Sal turned my attention towards the stage, where the first band was just about to start. A lot of people migrated towards the front, but we agreed to stay put. When they started playing, Sal and I looked at each other and burst out laughing. They were beyond terrible, but pretty entertaining to watch, if only because the lead singer was a shirtless boy with a very nice body.
A little while later, Anna and Nat drifted back towards us.
‘Hi, you must be Sal.’ Anna smiled broadly, and stuck out her hand for Sal to take.
Sal looked confused, but shook the proffered hand anyway. ‘Yeah, er … hi.’
‘Nat was just telling me about you. You’re Grace’s best friend?’
Sal nodded.
Anna sighed wistfully. ‘I’ve never had a best friend – someone to share everything with. You two are so lucky.’ Man, this girl is a proper weirdo.
Nat pushed his wrist in front of Anna’s face and tapped his watch. ‘Hadn’t you better be getting back to work?’
I was surprised at his rudeness, but glad that he wanted to get rid of her just as much as I did.
Anna stuck her tongue out at him, then looked back at me and Sal. ‘Well, it was lovely to meet both of you ladies. I can see Nat’s got his hands full with you two! Laters!’ She lavished us with one final impish grin before disappearing into the crowd.
Sal shoved her drink into my hands, saying she was desperate for the toilet. I was bursting too, but before I could ask Nat to hold our drinks, Sal had bolted. I followed a couple of minutes later, after quizzing Nat about his weird friend. He’d merely shrugged and said, ‘That’s just Anna,’ as if that explained everything.
Sal was washing her hands when I found her, staring vacantly into the mirror. ‘Feeling better?’ She flinched as if I’d crept up on her.
‘What do you mean?’
‘Just that you were desperate for the loo, remember?’
‘Oh yeah. Much better.’
‘Wait for me, will you?’
My chosen cubicle was disgusting, but the graffiti did a good job of distracting me. I was surprised people could be so creative in such adverse conditions. When I came out, I asked Sal what she thought of Anna, while I washed my hands with extra thoroughness.
‘She’s pretty.’
‘Pretty weird, you mean?’ I paused. ‘Do you think she fancies Nat?’
Sal shrugged. ‘How would I know?’
‘I dunno. I bet she does though – I saw the way she looked at him.’
‘Why do you even care? You’re the one he’s going out with.’
‘I know, I know. It’s just … she’s all cool and pierced and … older than us.’
Sal looked at me like I was crazy. ‘What’s that got to do with anything?’
‘I don’t know! She just makes me feel like a stupid little schoolgirl. Like there’s some big joke I’m not quite in on … you know?’
Sal shook her head. ‘I think you’re reading too much into it. Don’t worry about it. Now let’s get your paranoid head back out there. I don’t know about you, but I fancy getting some shots in.’
I smiled. ‘Now that is the best idea I’ve heard in ages.’
We linked arms and headed back into the fray. The number of people there seemed to have doubled in the short time we’d been gone. It took us a couple of minutes to find Nat, who’d managed to get a table in a reasonably quiet corner. We downed the rest of our drinks, and Nat headed off to the bar to get the shots. Sal and I had barely settled into our old routine of making up bizarre life stories for the people we were watching when Nat emerged from the thronging crowd. He brandished a tray laden with enough shots for a small army (well, a football team at least), and was looking mighty pleased with himself.
He sat down and carefully placed the tray in front of us. ‘Check it out!’
‘I take it you didn’t pay for them?’
‘A tenner for the lot.’
‘Won’t Anna get in trouble?’ I hope so.
‘Nah, she was pretty sly about it. She wouldn’t care if she got fired anyway.’ And then he sort of muttered, ‘Plus, she owes me.’
‘For what?’
He shrugged. ‘I’m always buying her drinks when we’re out.’ So he goes out with her a lot? We’ll have to see about that.
I doled out the shots. ‘Right, let’s drink.’
And so we did. I began to think that maybe Anna wasn’t so bad after all. Anyone who supplied free drinks was OK with me … as long as she kept her hands off my boyfriend.
A few shots down the line, a new band started up. They were loud and brash, and actually tuneful. I jumped up, somewhat unsteadily. ‘I’m going to the front. Who’s with me?’
Sal and Nat exchanged glances. Nat said, ‘Maybe later,’ at exactly the same time as Sal said, ‘Not right now.’
‘Man, how boring are you two? Fine, I’ll see you in a bit.’ I turned and weaved my way towards the stage. I wasn’t in the least bit bothered about being on my own. The alcohol was flowing through my veins and I just wanted to jump up and down until I could jump no more. And it’d be good for Sal and Nat to have a chance to chat without me watching them like a hawk, willing them to like each other.
I managed to wheedle my way into the pack of people dancing and jostling in front of the stage. Calling it ‘dancing’ was stretching it a little bit: people were bouncing off each other, elbows flying everywhere. I threw myself into it with complete abandon, jumping around and sweating a lot. These guys were awesome. It felt as if the bass burrowed into the very core of me until I became part of the music itself. God, I was properly wasted.
After half an hour or so, I stopped jumping and dragged my fingers through my sweaty hair. I was dizzy and thirsty and elated. Time to head back to the others, after a quick trip to the toilets to check myself in the mirror. Amazingly, the eye make-up was still in place. Somehow it looked better than it had before – nicely smudged, like I wasn’t trying so hard. My reflection stared back at me, slightly bedraggled, but alive and sparkly
in a way I’d never noticed before. I smiled at the girl in the mirror; a real smile just for me and me alone. Is this what happiness feels like? I laughed and threw a scrunched-up paper towel, which hit my reflection on the nose.
As I approached our table, I saw Sal and Nat, their heads close together. He was saying something in her ear, and she was shaking her head vigorously. Her face had a stubborn set to it. Whatever they were talking about looked way too serious. I hoped he hadn’t said anything to upset her.
‘Hey, guys,’ I had to almost shout.
Nat looked up guiltily, which made me sure he’d said something stupid to Sal. ‘Hi.’
I sat down and picked a shot glass from the tray. They hadn’t drunk many in my absence. Sal took one too and we downed them simultaneously.
‘So … what were you two talking about?’ I asked casually.
‘Nothing much,’ said Nat.
‘Didn’t look like nothing much to me! Tonight’s supposed to be fun, remember? No more serious debates, OK?’ Nothing – not even burning curiosity about what they’d been talking about – was going to ruin my mood.
We drank another shot each, and I told them all about my ‘spiritual’ dancing experience. They laughed at me. We sat and drank more. Nat didn’t seem the slightest bit interested in watching the bands, which seemed a little strange, considering he’d bought the tickets in the first place.
When Sal headed off to the toilets, I took the opportunity to snuggle up to Nat. He smelled really good, and I didn’t even feel self-conscious about the fact that I might not, after all the dancing. I kissed him, but he seemed a bit distracted.
‘Are you OK?’ I asked.
‘Yeah, I’m fine. Are you having a good time?’
‘I am … Are you?’
He nodded.
‘What were you and Sal talking about before? She looked kind of upset.’
‘Oh … nothing. Really.’ My facial expression told him he was going to have to do better than that. ‘All right, all right. I was teasing her about Devon.’
I smacked him on the arm, semi-playfully. ‘You idiot! You know she’s a bit funny about him. Just watch what you say – I really want her to have a good time tonight.’
