by Hart, Rebel
By the time we were done, we had a very confusing outline of what needed to happen. Ways we could cut back our bills. Things we could get rid of completely to save money. I promised her I’d research cheap meals for two and she promised me she’d put in two job applications every day from now until she snagged one.
And as I slipped out of bed, I felt the dawning of a new day upon us.
My feet planted into the ground and my body didn’t feel so heavy. Getting dressed didn’t feel like such a burden. I didn’t bust a sweat taking a shower because I had to move around to get myself clean. I even took the steps downstairs two by two, jumping at the end before scooping up my backpack. I felt great. I felt alive. For the first time since Clint and I came together as one, I didn’t feel burdened. Or stressed. The hopelessness that had plagued me no longer reared its head.
What a damn good feeling for a Monday morning.
Things were finally back on track. I made sure I had all my books in my bag, then double-checked my purse. I had my wallet, my keys, my phone. I had some snacks and some chewing gum. I even had some lip gloss in here, in case I wanted to spruce up a bit.
All I needed was something to snack on for breakfast.
“Rae?”
Mom’s voice pulled me into the kitchen.
“Rae, you got a second?”
I plucked an apple from the fruit bowl. “Not much more than that. Gotta get to Clint and everyone.”
“About that.”
I paused. “Everything okay?”
Mom’s face looked worried. That is, until a grin slowly slid across her face. I sighed as I bit into the apple, ready to chuck it at her for worrying me like that.
“Come on. Spit it out. What are you hiding, Mom?”
She sipped her coffee. “I called your school this morning.”
“Oh? Why?”
“To tell them you aren’t coming in today.”
I paused. “Wait, why?”
She grinned. “Because we’re going shopping for accessories to go with your graduation dress.”
“We are?”
“Mm-hmm. I take it you probably didn’t get any while you were out?”
“I mean, I have a pair of shoes that probably match.”
“You know good and well ‘probably’ isn’t good enough for an accomplishment like this. And plus, you have your ears pierced. I hardly see you wearing earrings. Is the dress low-cut?”
“No, but it’s strapless.”
“I’ll need to see the colors of it so we can pick something out accordingly. But if it’s strapless, a nice bracelet will accent things well.”
“But… our budget?”
She sighed. “I can buy my daughter some accessories to go with her graduation dress.”
I narrowed my eyes playfully. “You found some money in your purse, didn’t you?”
“Yes. And I want to spoil my daughter with it.”
I shook my head, but deep down I was screaming with delight. I hadn’t spent a day with my mom in years. And I couldn't wait to go out with her. Plus, I had a bit of my own money to spend. My paycheck from the grocery store had a nice bump in it because of my raise. So, I silently decided to treat Mom to lunch while we were out.
But first, I had to tell the gang I wasn’t coming.
Me: Hey, Clint. I won’t be at school today. Mom and I are spending some time together. I’m sorry for missing school, but Allison can help you with things today for classes. Text me if you need anything.
I sent the message off and didn't have to wait long to get a response.
Clint: You two have a blast. Have fun, and I’ll let you know how things go at the apartment after school.
I slipped my phone back into my purse and dropped my backpack to the floor. Mom came over and hugged me, holding me for the longest time. I sighed. I relished her touch. Her embrace. Her companionship. I closed my eyes and sank my cheek against her shoulder, feeling embraced by a mother I’d lost some time ago.
“I’m so sorry, Rae.”
I shook my head. “Stop. It’s in the past. We can only go forward, okay?”
Mom snickered. “I don't know when you grew up on me.”
“And that’s okay. Just keep getting better. For me, and for yourself.”
She set her coffee down and swayed side to side, rocking me like she used to when I was a child. I felt myself falling back into those memories. Into the first memory I had of gazing up into my mother’s face. I’d been sick with the flu. Coughing and unable to sleep. Hurting in places I didn’t understand. And she had been there, with her own version of the flu. Making me sip water, giving me popsicles, and singing my favorite lullaby.
“Hush little Raelynn, don’t say a word. Momma’s gonna buy you a mockingbird.”
My eyes welled with tears as she started singing it to me. Right there, in my ear, as we swayed in the kitchen. I didn’t even try holding back my tears. I simply let them fall, dragging with them the pain and anguish I’d dealt with for all of my teenage years. I shook against my mom. I felt her wrap me up tight. My knees clicked together and my toes curled as I tried keeping up my strength.
With Mom singing in my ear.
“I’ve missed you so much, Mom.”
She sighed. “I love you so much, Rae.”
“Can we just—stay like this for a bit?”
“For however long you want, princess.”
I don’t know how much time we spent in that kitchen. But after a while, Mom started moving. Walking me down the hallway as I kept clinging to her. She walked us into the living room. We sat down on the couch we had occupied for hours last night. I crawled into her lap. Eighteen years old, five-foot-six, and one hundred and fifty-two pounds. All of me curled against her. And her arms somehow still wrapped around me. Her hands locked, her lips fell against my forehead, and she kissed me. Repeatedly. As the tears continued falling.
“Hush little Raelynn, don’t you hurt. Momma’s gonna promise to keep her word. And if this Momma does relapse, you have permission to kick her ass.”
I sputtered with laughter as I sniffed back more tears. My head fell against her shoulder as she looked down at me. Still the giant of a woman I’d always known, despite the fact that we were the same height. My tears dried up as she smiled at me. I slowly raised my head as I slipped off to the side. With her arm around my back and my legs tossed into her lap, she settled into the couch. Smiling at me with a happiness I hadn’t seen in her face since… well?
Since, ever.
“Independence looks good on you, Mom.”
She snickered. “Let’s just hope it stays that way. I’m getting old, you know.”
“Oh, boo. You’re hardly in your forties.”
“That’s almost mid-life crisis age.”
“Don’t tell me you’re going to go out and get yourself a hot rod.”
She giggled. “Don’t be silly. Women go out and bring home a pool boy. Not a hot rod.”
I threw my head back with laughter as my back fell to the couch.
“You’re absolutely insane, you know that?”
Her hand wrapped around mine. “You had to get it from somewhere.”
I smiled up at the ceiling. “So, any chance I can talk you into having lunch with me while we shop?”
“I take it you got paid?”
“And got a raise at work.”
She gasped. “Rae! That’s fantastic. When did that happen?”
“Not too long ago. I’m only, like, five days into my raise. But that five days gives me enough extra money for us to get lunch somewhere. Like that sub place you love so much.”
“Oh, they have the best roast beef sandwich.”
“I don’t know how you eat that stuff. It stinks.”
“Now you know how I feel when I watch you drink pickle juice.”
I hummed. “Mmm, pickles. I need to pick some up the next time I’m working.”
“You can keep your pickles and I’ll keep my roast beef. How’s that sound?�
��
“Fine by me. Just don’t burp in my face. I’m not liable for my actions if you do.”
She began tickling me and I started squealing my head off.
“Mom! No!”
“I don’t burp. Take it back.”
“Mom! I hate being tickled! Mommy!”
She giggled profusely. “Take it back.”
“You don’t burp! You don’t burp! Uncle! Uncle!”
She stopped tickling me and I gasped for air, rolling off the couch. I hated being tickled. It was the worst sensation. But, as I slowly stood to my feet, a grin crossed my face.
“You fart like an old man, though.”
She shot up. “You’ve got double tickles for that.”
And as I took off up the stairs, I laughed my ass off, hearing her hot on my heels as I darted into my room.
35
Clinton
A horn honking caught my ear as I walked out of the front of the school. Cecilia sat there in her bright red car, shining like the sun as she waved me down. She smiled brilliantly, and I couldn't recall ever seeing that kind of smile on her face. I jogged over and dropped down into the car, discarding my backpack between my legs.
“You look nice. What’s the occasion?”
She rolled up my window. “Because today, if we play our cards right, we’ll have a new home.”
I chuckled. “I take it you’re excited.”
“I’m more than excited. I’m ready to get this party started.”
The second I had my seatbelt buckled, she took off, zooming out of the cul-de-sac in front of the school and careening down the road. She had the music blasting with classic rock as she bobbed her head to the beat. Driving barefoot, of all things, as we raced down the road. I rolled my window down and let my arm rest out in the sun. I couldn't stop stealing looks over at her. How happy she looked. How carefree her hair was tossed on top of her head. It looked as if her own bonds had fallen away. Her face was barely covered in makeup. Her ears displayed simple stud earrings instead of the expensive, glistening diamonds I was used to seeing on her.
Simple suited her.
We drove in silence, but by no means was it empty. We jammed out to music and she played air guitar behind the wheel of the car at stoplights. I laughed at her as she yelled the words to her favorite songs. I’d never seen this side of her. Hell, I would have never guessed it existed. If she was nervous, the only thing that gave it away was how hard she gripped her steering wheel.
Her knuckles were practically white with tension.
We drove for maybe four miles before she turned on her blinker. Got into the left-hand lane. I looked over and saw the sprawling complex scattered with trees and greenery. It looked so different from the other places in Riverbend. The apartment buildings were brightly colored on the outside with stone work peppered in that felt pleasing to the eye. It looked like each apartment had its own private balcony. Beautiful white-washed wrought iron. This place screamed ‘Cecilia’. It was definitely the kind of place I’d find someone like her in.
I hoped, for her sake, we qualified for something like this.
We pulled up to the parking lot in front of the lobby and got out. She slipped her heels on and stood up, smoothing her hands over her dress. She looked over at me and smiled. I held my hand out, ushering her toward the front door. And as we walked inside, a man dressed in a pale pink button-front shirt stood up, holding his arms out for her.
“Cecilia. You look amazing.”
She hugged him softly. “Matthew, it’s really nice to meet you in person. Finally.”
I waved. “Hey there.”
The man grinned. “And you must be Clinton. Cecilia called me and told me you were coming with her today. Nice to meet you.”
He held his hand out to me and I shook it.
“Yeah, I wanted to come along with her and check out the place for myself.”
He quirked an eyebrow. “Oh? Cecilia made it sound like you were moving with her.”
I grinned. “If that’s the best course of action for everyone, yes. But I’d like to see the apartment before either of us make a decision on anything.”
He nodded. “Of course. I’ve got the golf cart cranked up and ready to go, if you guys would like a tour of the complex?”
Cecilia nodded. “We’d love one, thank you.”
We followed Matthew out back and hopped onto the cart. Me in the back and Cecilia up front with him. We drove around the massive grounds, racing by the tennis courts, the beautiful blue pool that housed a deck, a small cobblestone pathway to the enclosed hot tub, as well as grills for the people living in the complex to use. It really was a nice place, tucked back away among lush trees and rich, green grass.
It felt more and more like home as we continued pressing onward.
“So, are we seeing a model room? Or the actual apartment you’re wanting to rent to us?” I asked.
Matthew pulled into a parking space. “Oh, no. This is the actual apartment. And it’s a good one, too. First floor, back right corner. Only one side of the apartment gets the harshness of the sun, so your energy bills won’t skyrocket during the summer.”
I nodded. “And all the appliances come with it?”
Cecilia snickered. “Why don’t we get inside and see?”
Matthew smiled. “He’s okay. It’s good that he’s asking questions. It means he cares about where you end up. Remember that.”
I liked this guy.
We walked down the small hallway before he pulled out some keys. And the second the door to the apartment opened, Cecilia drew in a soft breath of air. Even I stood there, shocked. In all the best ways.
“Holy shit, this looks better than the pictures.”
Matthew chuckled. “I told my boss those pictures we threw up there online were shitty. Excuse my language.”
Cecilia slowly walked in. “The hardwood floors are beautiful.”
I furrowed my brow. “Are those granite countertops in the kitchen?”
“And look! A built-in breakfast nook!”
I shook my head as Matthew ushered us in. He closed the door behind us and gave us the grand tour, with my jaw dropping to the floor. There was so much room in this fucking place. I mean, for an apartment? Hell, yeah. I went into the kitchen and checked all the appliances, which I found had been recently updated. I walked over to the balcony, shaded by the trees and the balcony above it. The white-washed wrought iron made the little nook cozy, and it overlooked a long stretch of grass that led softly down a hill.
Where I heard people splashing in the pool.
Rae and I could spend the summer by the pool after graduation.
I imagined her in a cute little bikini. Me, slathering tanning oil on her back. Driving me wild all summer while I wrote in my notebook and she rested between my legs. I hadn’t even seen the bedrooms, and already this place felt like home.
Michael and Allison could even join us.
“Clint? Honey?”
I whipped around at the sound of my stepmom’s voice.
“Yeah? Sorry. Just thinking.”
Matthew grinned. “About that nice pool you saw?”
I snickered. “It was nice.”
“We have the biggest apartment complex pool in Riverbend. And the hot tub comfortably seats fifteen people.”
Cecilia’s eyes widened. “Fifteen? That’s a small pool in and of itself.”
“We pride ourselves in providing the best for our apartment dwellers.”
I sighed. “So, what’s the catch?”
They both fell silent and all eyes were on me.
“There is no catch,” Matthew said.
I snickered. “There’s always a catch.”
Cecilia cleared her throat. “We already talked about this.”
I nodded. “I know. But you guys will be losing a profit on our lease at twelve hundred for a place like this. I want to know there isn’t some catch. Something you expect us to do in exchange for paying such a low cost of rent
here.”
Matthew walked over to me and placed his hands on my shoulders. I didn’t like him being so close. But it was better than my father being that close. I stood my ground, keeping my eyes connected with his. I wasn't backing down on this. I wouldn’t let my stepmother get swindled by anyone else. Not again.
Not as long as she protected me.
“I’m not going to assume to know everything about your story. But let’s say I get the gist.”
I furrowed my brow. “Okay?”
Matthew licked his lips. “I watched my mother, for many years, get treated as less than by my stepfather. I watched her get taken advantage of for years. And she didn’t live long enough for me to see her become the strong woman I knew she was, deep down.”
I sighed. “Dude, I’m sorry.”
“I got a soft spot for your stepmother’s story. For what I think she’s gone through. And I’d like to think I’m pretty good at reading between the lines.”
“I’m sure you probably are.”
His hands fell from my shoulders. “There are some catches. But they’re small. You’ll provide your own bulbs. Batteries for the three smoke detectors. If any major plumbing issues pop up that our maintenance men can’t resolve, you’re responsible for the bill. But that’s it. If you blow a bulb, the maintenance men will use your bulbs and replace them. Same with the batteries. It’ll all be written out in your lease agreement. Along with the twelve hundred for rent.”
“And that’s it?”
He nodded. “That’s it. Those three things. That will keep our cost down substantially on this apartment and give us the ability to offer this at a price that suits you and your stepmother’s current situation.”
“And your management knows about this?”
“They’re the first people I convinced of it.”
My eyes darted over his shoulder to Cecilia, who was standing anxiously waiting for my response. I didn’t mean to make her so nervous. I just wanted to make sure she’d be okay here.
