Just Love Me

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Just Love Me Page 12

by Traci Sek


  "Emily, open the door please!" I said knocking louder.

  "Jake. It's ok. I'm getting ready for the party!" She yelled through the door. Her voice sounded a bit shaky.

  "Why can't I come in to see you? Lisa told me you weren't feeling well again." I heard footsteps shuffle to the door.

  "I'm fine babe. I promise. I just want to surprise you for once. I promise I'm ok.” Hesitation lined her voice.

  "Do I have a choice?" I heard her beautiful laugh on the other side of the door.

  "No! Now go so I have enough time."

  I sighed. "Alright, but only this once. I don't like surprises." No response. I decided to walk away and get ready myself.

  An hour later people started to arrive. I gave myself one final look in the mirror and headed down the stairs. I'm greeted by a few coworkers who thanked me for hosting the party. But it doesn’t do anything to stop my mind from wandering, glancing in the direction of the kitchen. The next people to arrive were my family. My nephews attacked me from all angles. I laughed, ruffled their hair, and gave them hugs. I heard a throat clear behind me and I whirled around to see Emily.

  She was absolutely stunning in a silk red dress that flowed down past her ankles with a slit that reached her thigh. Her hair was in a slick ponytail bun and was complete with silver high heels.

  "Close your mouth you're drooling silly," she said as she pushed my bottom jaw gently closed with the tip of her index finger. I smiled at her and kissed her on the lips. I wanted everyone to know that this beautiful woman was mine.

  "You look absolutely breathtaking. I'm glad I waited after all. Although it was excruciating," I said protruding my bottom lip out.

  "There's my new intern!" Ashley strolled over, giving her a hug. "And my don't you just look gorgeous today!"

  "Thank you."

  "I want to introduce you to a few people." Ashley grabbed her hand and pulled her away from me. I started to move with her but my sister abruptly stopped. "Not you, just us. You’ve already met them."

  "Excuse me?" I protested.

  "It's ok babe, I'll be right back." Ashley grinned and continued to pull her into the ever-growing crowd.

  The crowd started to get to me as I patiently waited for Emily’s return. I felt a bit of anxiety creeping up on me as person after person continued to rave about finally having the Christmas party at our house, and how they never thought we would host it again. All I wanted was to wrap my arms around Emily and be alone. I headed towards the bar and poured myself a drink. A cold hand landed on my shoulder making me sigh.

  "Finally, you're back. I was starting to..." I stopped mid-sentence to not find Emily, but to find my therapist Jessica.

  Chapter Thirty-One

  Jake

  "I'm sorry. I thought,"

  "I was someone else?" She cut me off. I nodded.

  "I haven't heard from you Jake." She placed her hand on my chest and I peeled it off quickly.

  “I haven't needed you. In fact, I won't be needing you again."

  She laughed. "You are far from being cured Jake." I looked around for Emily who was still nowhere in sight.

  "Actually, I have a girlfriend who is taking care of me just fine." She frowned.

  "A girlfriend? The girl from the company Christmas party?"

  "She's with my sister at the moment. But she will be back any minute now. Speaking of which, where is your boyfriend?"

  She shrugged carelessly, never leaving my eyes.

  "He’s somewhere."

  She leaned into me so we were just inches apart. "Jake, we both know what I give you both physically and mentally, could never compare to some plain Jane you just met a couple days ago."

  The anger I felt intensified and I fought to contain it as I didn't want to cause a scene.

  "I think you better leave now." I said through gritted teeth.

  "That's what I thought. You can't deny this." Before I knew it she grabbed my face and planted her lips on mine. I heard a gasp from behind her as I grabbed her shoulders and pushed her away. I see Emily standing behind her and my heart sank.

  "Emily!"

  She turned and ran through the crowd with lightning speed.

  "You bitch. You set me up! You did that on purpose." I screamed at her. Her eyes raised in shock but she said nothing. All eyes were on me as I pushed her out of the way and ran after Emily.

  "Where is Emily?" I asked my sister, bumping into her.

  "I don't know, she went back to you."

  "Damn it!" I ran to the pool house and turned the knob but it was locked.

  "Baby please open the door! It's not what you think." Silence. "I swear she set me up! She kissed me. I didn't even kiss her back! She... she..." I lost my breath and I felt like crying. I didn't know what to do.

  This isn't some business deal that I can make go away. This is real life. This is where I could use my mother's advice. I said a small prayer begging for her to at least let me in and explain. I suddenly remembered Aida had a spare key to every room so I got up and ran down to find her.

  "Aida! I need the spare key to Emily's room." I said out of breath.

  "What's wrong? Is everything ok?"

  "I can't explain right now just give me the key!"

  She rummaged through her pockets quickly and retrieved the key. I grabbed it from her and ran through the crowd again. I got to her door and knocked once more.

  "Emily! I'm coming in. I have a spare key." When I didn't hear a response, I stuck the key in and swung the door open making sure to close it behind me. I looked around but didn't see her. I heard sobbing coming from the bathroom door.

  "Emily, baby, please talk to me. Let me explain! It's not what you think!"

  "Go away!"

  "No! I'm not going away! She kissed me! She set me up!" I heard her throw up followed by more sobbing.

  "If you don't open this door I will," I said. She doesn't respond. Taking the key, I turned it slowly not knowing what to expect. Her small frame was curled up on the floor by the toilet.

  "Why don't you listen!" She screamed at me before pulling herself up again to vomit. I grabbed her hair that she yanked out of her ponytail to get it out of her face.

  "I won't listen because you won't listen!"

  When she was finished, she leaned her head against the wall. Her face was tear stained and she was paler than usual which sent alerts through my brain. Dropping to my knees in front of her, I took in her appearance. She's no longer wearing the red dress but just sweatpants and one of my old t-shirts.

  "Emily. I don't want anyone else! I'm so pissed that she did that to me. Please believe me.”

  "I don't believe you! I've seen her before. She's... she's your freaking therapist! I knew there was something weird when I met her.”

  "Yes. She is. But I honestly don't have feelings for her. I never did. I told her to leave and instead she kissed me and that's what you saw."

  She tried to get up but to no avail. "Let me help you."

  "No! I don't want your help! I made that stupid mistake the first time. I can do this on my own!"

  She tried again getting up this time but wobbled. I wrapped my hands around her waist, giving her no choice but to lean on me as I directed her to the bed.

  "I trusted you Jake!" She wailed.

  "And you still can! Nothing has changed! Please believe me. I'll do anything. I can't lose you. Please." I started to cry again. I didn't care if I was a man or not. I got down on my knees and wrapped my arms around her stomach. I cried into her stomach like a big baby, the same way I did the night I asked her to be my girlfriend. After a few minutes, I feel her arms wrap around my head.

  "I'm so mad at you Jake, but I’m too sick and tired to fight right now. How do we fix this?"

  I looked up at her. "I'll do whatever you want. I'm laying all my pride and everything on the floor for you."

  "Don't do that Jake. I don't want you to do that. Get up. I need you to be the strong one here because I'm falling apart at the
seams!"

  I quickly did as she asked. "And I'm here! I promise. I'm not going anywhere."

  Her shoulders sagged. "I need some time to think. Please just go so I can rest."

  "But I.."

  "Please go! Before I change my mind!"

  What else could I do? I didn't have the strength or the heart to fight her. I simply accepted her wishes and left.

  Chapter Thirty-Two

  Jake

  I slammed my office door hard, making the paintings rattle on the wall. I went straight for my liquor cabinet, whipped it open and grabbed the bottle of scotch. I quickly poured a drink and chugged it. Slamming the glass down, I poured another and chugged it. I sank down into my office chair feeling the liquid burn my insides as it went down.

  I needed to mask the pain and the nerves I was feeling and this was the only way I knew how. Was I going to lose her? What could she possibly be thinking about? I need space Jake. Her voice echoed in my head. She didn't need space, she needed me. I was the one who was supposed to make her feel better. My heart accelerated a little bit at the thought as I gulped down two more glasses of the amber liquid. I barely registered the abrasive knock on my door. Part of me hoped it was Emily coming to wrap her arms around me but when the door opened, my dad's head popped in.

  "I was wondering where you took off to."

  "I'm not in the mood. Just go away." His eyebrows creased his forehead as he looked from me to the glass of alcohol I was pouring and back to me.

  "What happened?" He came further in and shut the door.

  "Nothing that concerns you."

  "Well you are back to drinking I see. I'm your father, everything concerns me." My vision started to blur a bit which meant the alcohol was finally doing its job. Just a little while longer and I wouldn’t be able to feel the pain.

  "So what if I drink?" It came out a bit slurred but I pulled it together.

  "Jacob Noah Williams. Put down that drink right now!" He boomed, stalking over to me, ripping the glass bottle out of my hands.

  "Hey! Give that back!" The whole room spun as I stood up. I had to fight hard to focus holding tightly to the desk.

  "No! You have had enough! Now tell me what happened? You were fine when we arrived and now all of a sudden, I find you in here half drunk! Where is Emily?" The sound of her name is like someone punching me in the gut and I'm suddenly reminded of the events tonight.

  "She's probably packing her bags. She doesn't want me anymore dad! I - I mean, I can't blame her! She saw me kissing another girl." I laughed hysterically even though the situation was not funny. Damn alcohol. Well it was better than crying my eyes out.

  "What the hell do you mean you kissed another girl?"

  "Well, I didn't (hiccup) actually." I stopped for a moment and plopped back down on my chair. My whole body was heavy as fuck and my dad wouldn’t stop moving in circles.

  "My therapist kissed me! Can you believe it? The nerve of her. Anyhow, Emily saw it and ran away and she wouldn't even let me touch her." Even though I was trying to follow the movement of my dad, my face was set in stone. A deep frown lined my face as I recall the hurt look on her face. More like shattered.

  "First of all, it was just a kiss that you had no control over. Second of all from what I have witnessed and heard, I highly doubt she would just up and leave you. This drinking is nonsense. You're being way too sensitive about this situation. Let her breathe. Let her think. Let her calm down and come to you when she is ready. And when she is this is how you want her to see you?!"

  He had a point. I didn't want her to see me like this. I just did it out of impulse like I always did in the past. It was always the easiest solution. I shook my head at him as I loosened up my tie and unbuttoned the top button.

  "Why do you even care dad? You hated her from day one, when you found out she was living here and now you don’t trust her because you think she's going to steal our money or whatever.” My eyelids fought to stay open and the exhaustion hit me full force. I had nothing left in me to keep fighting.

  "I never said I hated her! I said to watch your back. You barely even knew her! You are my son first and I, as your father, look out for you. Just as I'm doing now. Jake, you need to be very honest with her."

  "About what? I've told her everything." He arches an eyebrow.

  "Jake, we all know that woman was not just your therapist. Everyone except Emily. She needs to know what you did with her and tell her that you led her on and dropped her without warning. You are both at fault here and the only way to make it right is by telling her."

  I stared at my dad in awe. How the hell did he know what I was doing? I was tempted to ask before my brain reminded me of who he was and what he was capable of.

  "Fix this Jake and get focused back on the job or I'm going to have to replace you. You and I both know that's not what we want. You are a smart kid, stop getting distracted. We have a new client downstairs that I was hoping you could meet. He's a big-time investor looking for a property that he can turn into a bed and breakfast. He wants to charge 500 dollars a night. Top notch, unfortunately you are in no state of mind. I'm giving you one week off to get your affairs in order. We meet next Monday at nine am for a conference."

  I nodded in response as the alcohol had taken over my brain, keeping me from speaking. He turned around briskly and exited through the door. Every word he said was true and hit me hard. I needed to change in every way. No more drowning my sorrows in alcohol and no more explosions of anger. I had to fully give my all to Emily. I could no longer be the guy that held the world on my shoulders hiding behind a mask. We needed to lean on each other through thick and thin and I was determined to do so. I laid down on my black leather couch, letting my thoughts drift me into a deep sleep.

  Chapter Thirty-Three

  Emily

  I tossed and turned for hours before finally giving up. It was no use to sleep without Jake. I had no energy, but my brain was in overdrive. I couldn’t fathom the events that had happened almost within a blink of an eye. I knew it wasn't his fault, I should have seen it coming. That doesn't mean that it didn't hurt like hell or that it didn't piss me off. I was so frustrated and growing a headache the more I thought about the events. Guilt consumed me for the way I treated him. But why? He deserved every bit of it whether it was his fault or not he needed to know I wasn’t going to tolerate that. Is that really how you feel Emily? My subconscious asked over and over.

  No. Is what I answered every time. I saw the hurt in his eyes. I heard it in his voice. But I needed him to see that it had affected me. I needed him to see that I wasn't some weak girl that would just kiss and make up and forget that anything had happened. If I had learned anything from my parents, it was that in a relationship, a man and a woman had to be equal. I'd be damned if I let a man control me the way my father controlled my mother.

  We needed to talk. It was time for me to know how he would handle this. We both jumped into this head first without thinking about the consequences or how one felt about it. I threw off the covers and got out of bed. Pulling on my robe, I tiptoed out of the pool house, taking what had become my normal route to his room. I opened the door slowly only to be met with an empty bed. In fact, it was still made which meant he hadn't even tried to sleep.

  After racking my brain of all the places he could possibly be, it hit me. His office. I closed the door quietly and tiptoed down the hall a little further. Slowly pushing his office door open I glanced around. It was almost completely dark with the exception of a small table light that sat on top of his desk, illuminating his empty chair. My eyes continued to dart around the room before landing on his leather couch where he laid, spread out stretching from one side to the next. A small glass sat on the floor next to his dangling hand.

  He was still in his tux from the Christmas party but the tie was hung loose and the top button was open. His hair was a ruffled mess with one arm above his head and his mouth was slightly agape. He looked so peaceful asleep like this. I stared at
his features for a while longer soaking up every inch of him. How could I be mad at this human being? He was just a child deep down like me who was forced to grow up too quickly thanks to this cruel world. I came closer and smelt a strong odor of alcohol. Of course, he drank himself to sleep. I thought as I moved the glass away from his hand. I then shook him a bit.

  After a few nudges and me calling his name, he began to stir. His eye lids had to fight to open and when they did, he stared back at me unmoving as if he didn't believe what he was looking at.

  "I couldn't sleep."

  A deep frown lined his face and then as if a light bulb turned on, he quickly started to get up.

  "No! Don't get up." I say. He stopped mid-way. "Just scooch over a little. I'll lay with you."

  He nodded and then moved back a few inches and turned to his side. I sat down sinking into the leather sofa and laid down, my back facing him. I felt a light blanket cover me and then his strong warm arm wrap around my torso. His palm rested there sending me into a peacefulness that I had come to know and love.

  "I'm still mad at you and we will talk in the morning when I'm not tired," I said sleepily. He simply hummed in my ear before I drifted off to sleep.

  Chapter Thirty-Four

  Emily

  I woke up the next morning to the sun shining directly in my face. I pull my head up as my neck cracks. My hand is numb and tingling as I shake it around to wake it up. Note to self, next time make him sleep in the bed and not a cramped little leather couch. Jake was still unmoving, lightly snoring. I smiled at him and then forcefully, as hard as I could muster, slapped him on the chest. His eyes flew open in peer panic, looking in every direction before landing on me. I gave him a look and crossed my arms.

  "Get up. We need to talk." He groaned and grabbed his head with his hand.

  "Let me wake up for a minute. My head is pounding."

  "Good. Next time you won't drink yourself silly!" I slapped him again.

  "Ouch! Damn it. I'm in enough pain. Please stop!" I got up from the couch and looked out the window. I heard him sit up and sigh. The couch squealed and groaned indicating he had stood up. He headed straight for the bathroom and after about five minutes he emerged. I felt him come up behind me and wrap his arms around me, but I pulled away before I lost the nerve to speak.

 

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