Also by Michael Healey
Courageous
The Drawer Boy
Generous
The Innocent Eye Test
Kicked
The Nuttalls
Plan B
Proud
Rune Arlidge
with Kate Lynch:
The Road to Hell
To the memory of Allan Lawrence, PC, QC.
A principled and generous man.
Contents
Also by Michael Healey
Production History
Notes
Characters
Setting
Scene One
Scene Two
Acknowledgements
About the Author
Production History
1979 premiered at the Martha Cohen Theatre, Calgary, in a production by Alberta Theatre Projects on April 6, 2017, with the following company:
Actor A: Christopher Hunt
Actor B: Jamie Konchak
Joe Clark: Philip Riccio
Director: Miles Potter
Production Dramaturg: Laurel Green
Set and Projection Design: Scott Reid
Lighting Design: David Fraser
Costume Design: Jennifer Arsenault
Sound Design: Thomas Geddes
Stage Manager: Patti Neice
The Great Canadian Theatre Company, in co-production with the Shaw Festival, presented the play in Ottawa on April 13, 2017, with the following company:
Actor A: Kelly Wong
Actor B: Marion Day
Joe Clark: Sanjay Talwar
Director: Eric Coates
Set and Lighting Design: Steve Lucas
Costume Design: Jennifer Goodman
Sound Design: Keith Thomas
Stage Manager: Allan Teichman
The production then transferred to the Shaw Festival, opening in the Jackie Maxwell Studio Theatre, Niagara-on-the-Lake, on October 1, 2017.
Notes
The play can be staged with as few as three actors.
If three actors are used, one plays Joe Clark throughout. The other actors alternate entrances, and the distribution breaks down like this:
Actor A
Crosbie
Crosbie
Trudeau
MacDonald
Crosbie
MacDonald
Byrne
Actor B
Lawrence
MacDonald
McTeer
Mulroney
Harper
Harper
Characters
Prime Minister Joe Clark
John Crosbie
Allan Lawrence
Flora MacDonald
Pierre Elliott Trudeau
Maureen McTeer
Brian Mulroney
Stephen Harper
Jenni Byrne
Setting
The setting is the prime minister’s office in the Centre Block of Parliament Hill. It’s December 1979. There’s a door upstage centre, a desk, a chair or two, a credenza. Another door leads off left, behind the desk. Wood panelling if the design is that extensive; if so, it should seem oppressively woody—wooden shutters on windows, wood cabinetry: wood wood wood.
Scene One
Music off the top: “Tenth Avenue Freeze-Out,” by Bruce Springsteen. The live version from the Hammersmith Odeon concert in 1975.
Projection:
Joe Clark was elected Canada’s 16th prime minister on June 4, 1979. His was the first Progressive Conservative government in 16 years.
Projection:
The Right Honourable Joe Clark.
Prime Minister Joe clark enters through the upstage door. He wears a three-piece corduroy suit that is resolutely, emphatically, brown.
Projection:
Joe Clark was just 39 years old when he was elected Prime Minister.
He seems calm. He’s under some stress, and the veneer of calm is maintained through an enormous act of will. The following action is as close to an expression of anxiety as we will see for some time:
He removes his suit jacket, balls it up, and rubs his face with it, vigorously. He throws the suit jacket in a corner.
Projection:
His government, when elected, was 6 seats shy of a majority.
After a moment, he looks at the suit jacket with regret, retrieves it, and puts it on.
The sleeves are too short for his arms, as if adolescence isn’t quite done with him. His long fingers taper and flatten until they are practically two-dimensional by the tips. Even when he gestures emphatically, the energy fails to flow to the ends of his hands and the effect is this: he often looks like he’s holding an invisible Coke can when he’s making a point. His laugh—Uh Uh Uh!—is unique and immediately identifiable. It’s the only part of clark’s persona the actor playing him should try to emulate. As a laugh, it describes wariness, not fun.
clark sits at the desk. The music continues.
Projection:
Wednesday, December 12, 1979.
John crosbie enters. It’s impossible to hear the following conversation because of the music.
Projection:
John Crosbie, Minster of Finance.
crosbie: Joe.
clark: John.
crosbie: I was just about to go home, and I walked past the Liberal Christmas party—
clark: Right.
crosbie: Fucking greasy John Turner slides out, drunk as fuck, and as I’m wishing him a merry Christmas he’s pointing at me and laughing.
clark: Right.
crosbie: And also sneezing. He’s fucking getting wet all over me, and laughing, and I come this close to hauling off and I don’t know what. I told him what I thought of that shit he pulled in committee, you know, getting all of our witnesses held over to next year even though they’d all come from all over hell’s half acre to get here, and he’s just standing there, staring at me wetly. But so, then, Eugene Whelan comes out, takes one look at me, one look at Turner, then gets a panicked look all over his face and drags Turner back in. I swear to God, I think something’s up.
clark: John—
Projection:
The day before, December 11th, the Conservatives had finally introduced their first budget. They had been in power for more than 6 months before doing so.
crosbie: You don’t think they’d be stupid enough to—I mean, I’m telling ya— It’s that fucking gas tax; they all fucking hate it so much, and people are gonna hate it too, which I told you—
clark: Okay, John—
crosbie: I mean, Christ! I know the plan is to govern like we won a majority, I agree with that strategy, but what if we have to fight an election in a year’s time?
Projection:
It was a controversial document. In spite of the government’s minority status, it included several harsh and divisive measures. “Short term pain for long term gain” is how Crosbie described the budget when presenting it to the House.
And what’s this I hear about you not doing any fucking polling? Is it true—Sinc Stevens tells me this goddamn government can’t even get its shit together to put a simple goddamn fucking poll in the field?
clark: What?
crosbie: Eh?
clark: I didn’t quite—
crosbie: what?
clark: Did you say something about Sinc Stev—
crosbie notices the music for the first time.
crosbie: What the fuck—
crosbie strides arou
nd the room, looking for the source of the music. He discovers a stereo system behind a wood panel. He stabs buttons until the music stops.
clark: Hey. I was listening to that.
crosbie: And then, Trudeau walks out. They gave him a fucking chainsaw as a Christmas fucking gift. Little pecker starts waving it at me.
clark starts rummaging through the desk drawers.
I’m telling you, the Liberals are having too much fun for a party that says it hates being the official opposition. Joe. Joe!
He keeps looking through his drawers.
clark: Yes, John?
crosbie: Is any of this getting through?
clark: I’ve got to be honest, I missed most of it. But I get the gist.
crosbie: You do.
clark: Sure.
crosbie: And?
clark: And what, John?
crosbie: And what the fuck are we going to do?
A pause while clark rummages.
You know what I think? I think they’re getting set to defeat the bud—
clark has found a remote and hits a button, restoring the music. The following is inaudible.
clark: I know. I think you may be right. Look at this.
crosbie: Eh?
clark motions him over.
clark: (handing crosbie a paper) This is the NDP subamendment to the Liberal confidence motion.
crosbie reads. He gets pink.
crosbie: Those fuckers. I don’t get it. Those fuckers.
clark sits. crosbie paces.
They can’t force an election. Trudeau’s quit. They’ve no leader. How in the hell do they expect to conduct a campaign?
clark: This isn’t conclusive.
crosbie: This isn’t what?
clark: It’s not proof. It could mean anything. The NDP might expect the Liberals to—
crosbie: Can you turn that fucking shit off??
clark regards crosbie. He turns off the music.
clark: This isn’t conclusive.
crosbie: How much evidence do you need? They’re gonna vote down my budget tomorrow.
clark: Our budget.
crosbie: Right. Our budget. Our budget that I spent months kicking into existence, that has my face on it, and which I will wear like a stinking dead turbot around my neck when I go out and try to win my seat back in the next friggin’ election, which will apparently be taking place not next year, but next friggin’ month.
clark: Trudeau has resigned as leader. The NDP is broke. No one wants an election.
crosbie: They don’t give a shit. The Liberals will fight an election with a bag of chicken shit as leader rather than sit around in opposition.
clark: Plus, we have the moral right to govern. We’ve earned that.
crosbie: We have the—I beg your pardon? I beg your pardon, Joe?
clark: We have a year to eighteen months. That’s just tradition. We’re only six seats shy of a majority; we’ve earned the right to govern. We’ve earned our shot is what I’m saying.
crosbie: We’ve earned our shot.
clark: That’s what I’m saying.
crosbie: Is that what your polling is saying, Joe?
A pause.
When was your—sorry, our—last poll, Joe? When did we last put one in the field?
A pause.
Sinc Stevens says we haven’t done any polling since August. Is that right? Joe? Huh? And let’s assume for a minute the Liberals have done some polling of their own, more recently than five . . .
The incredible nature of this fact stalls him a moment.
Five. Motherfucking months ago. What do you think their polling is telling them? Do you think their polls are saying that Joe Clark has earned the moral right to govern for a period of between twelve and eighteen months?
clark: We’ve been busy. Tel Aviv, the energy negotiations—
crosbie: You’ve been busy?
clark: Mortgage deductibility took forever to figure out.
crosbie: Mort— Don’t you dare—you think I’m unaware of the problems that surrounded mortgage deductibility? The dumbest goddamn election promise ever made in the history of friggin’ democratic politics, and I spilt blood to figure out a way to make motherfucking mortgage deductibility work.
clark: John.
crosbie: Yes?
clark: The language. Would you mind?
A pause. crosbie regards clark carefully.
crosbie: No, Joe. Sorry. Sorry about my use of strong language, you incredible cu—
clark cuts him off by turning the music back on.
crosbie fumes, then exits.
clark turns the music off. He sits.
Projection:
Joe Clark won leadership of the Progressive Conservatives in 1976. He defeated Brian Mulroney. He was very young. He was everyone’s second choice.
Allan lawrence appears at the door. He’s low-key, friendly.
Projection:
Allan Lawrence, Minister of Consumer and Corporate Affairs, Solicitor General.
lawrence: Joe?
clark: Come in, Allan.
lawrence: You’re hearing what’s going on?
clark: Yeah.
lawrence: What do you think?
clark: What do I think. I think the Liberals will let the budget pass.
lawrence: You do.
clark: Sure. They’ll hold back a few members.
lawrence: Ah. Good.
A pause.
But, boy, if they don’t, that’d be a . . .
clark: Sure would.
lawrence: I mean, if they got the NDP to go along with them, then we’d be . . .
clark: Sure.
They blow out their cheeks at the same moment.
Projection:
Liberals 112 seats + NDP 27 seats = 139 seats.
Progressive Conservatives: 136 seats.
lawrence: I mean, maybe they don’t have the NDP.
clark: I think they could get them on board if they wanted to. Here.
clark hands lawrence the paper he showed crosbie.
lawrence: But you think they don’t want to.
clark: I don’t know. Maybe. I don’t know.
A beat.
Depends on Les Créditistes, I guess. If they side with us.
Projection:
Social Credit had 5 seats in the House. PC 136 seats + 5 Créditiste seats = 141 seats.
lawrence: That’s why I’m here. I was just summoned to Fabien Roy’s office. He says Social Credit will vote with us, but they have a condition.
clark: I bet they do.
Projection:
Several months earlier, Clark had rejected the idea of a PC–Créditiste coalition government. Créditiste leader Fabien Roy was insulted.
lawrence: They want a portion of the new gas tax revenue allocated to Quebec.
clark: It’s federal revenue. Some of it will be allocated to Quebec.
lawrence: That’s what I said. He said they want it shown to be allocated to Quebec.
clark: Shown to be.
lawrence: Shown to be.
clark: Shown to be how?
lawrence: Fabien did not have a specific plan in that regard. I think he hopes you’ll come up with something.
clark: Allan, is that the stupidest thing you’ve heard all day?
lawrence: Well. The day’s not over yet.
A pause.
You shouldn’t do it, Joe.
clark: Hmm? Oh. No, I wasn’t considering it. I can’t start caving in to a particular province. They’ll all come running. Bad enough I’ve got Peter Lougheed riding me like I’m a pony and it’s the last day of the Ex.
Projection:
Peter Lougheed, Premier of
Alberta, was demanding an enormous percentage of the proposed 18-cents-a-gallon gas tax.
lawrence: The—I’m sorry?
clark: No, sorry, I was just saying; I was saying I was a rental pony and it’s the last day of the Exhibition.
lawrence: Oh! The Ex. Got it. You’re Peter Lougheed’s pony. And he won’t get off?
clark: Yeah. Except when Bill Davis wants a turn.
Projection:
Bill Davis, Premier of Ontario, hated the gas tax. Everybody hated the gas tax. Clark was committed to moving the country toward the global oil price.
lawrence: Some friends.
clark: Yeah. Those are some friends we got.
A beat.
lawrence: Speaking of friends, Paul Yewchuk and Stan Korchinski told me they might stay away if there was a tight vote on the budget.
clark: Really.
lawrence: They’re both still pretty PO’d about not getting cabinet portfolios.
clark: But they’re still Progressive Conservatives.
lawrence: Oh yeah. Pissed enough they’d try to blackmail you, not pissed enough they’d actually quit being members of the governing party.
clark: Some friends.
lawrence: Yeah. Plus we’ve got Alvin Hamilton in the hospital, Lloyd Crouse is in like Tahiti . . . By my count, we’re down, uh . . .
clark: Like six? Six Conservative MPs travelling or sick or just being assholes?
Projection:
136 PC seats − 6 PCs who are ill, absent,
or assholes = 130 seats.
lawrence: Yup. So, even if you did get Fabien and the Socreds on side, we might not have enough votes.
Projection:
5 Créditistes = 135.
Liberal + NDP = 139 seats.
A pause.
clark: So how are you?
lawrence: I’m good.
clark: Moira, the kids?
lawrence: Good, good.
clark: Excellent. Send them my best.
lawrence: Will do. I actually just spoke to Moira. She’s ready to fire up the team if there’s a campaign to be fought in the next little while.
clark: No kidding.
lawrence: I think she relishes the idea of knocking on doors in the dead of winter. She believes we deserve a majority government.
A brief pause.
clark: Well, don’t say anything to her just yet. It probably won’t come to that.
1979 Page 1
