* * *
It took a full day’s travel for Eoin and his guards to escort the abbot to Brechin Cathedral. The monk had cursed and damned the Gordon men from the moment they mounted until they reached the Dundee city limits. Eoin had already bound the abbot to his horse, but he stopped the party of riders long enough to gag him as well. He was aware of the startling scene they created as they rode onto the Cathedral grounds with a bound and gagged monk. Eoin felt no guilt when he yanked the man off of his horse, surrendering him to Bishop Graham. He’d been truthful when he said he’d known the man his entire life, and Eoin’s story came as little surprise to the archimandrite who listened to both sides before having the abbot confined to a cell. Bishop Graham assured Eoin that the monk would rue the day he abused any of his flock, and Eoin didn’t doubt it. Called to monastic life at a young age, the archimandrite had still lived among Clan Graham long enough to train as a warrior first. There was an edge to the man that bade no nonsense, and a stern aura of command was obvious.
Eoin accepted the hospitality offered by the monks at the cathedral, and he enjoyed an evening meal that consisted of more than watery broth and stale bread. It wasn’t much more, since the monks didn’t eat meat, but he enjoyed dried fruit and cheese. He suspected his quick temper stemmed, in part, from hunger. Eoin and his men left before daylight as he raced back to Dundee Priory and Cairstine.
* * *
The two days Cairstine waited for Eoin to return were the two longest days of her life. She attempted to attend Lauds, but word had already spread of the altercation. She sensed--because no one dared say it aloud--that the nuns blamed her for the abbot’s behavior. Many were frightened to learn of Eoin’s violent reaction, believing he, and Cairstine by association, violated the sanctity of the consecrated ground. Cairstine realized the rumors floating around the priory were the most words spoken aloud that didn’t involve prayer that she’d heard since arriving at the priory. She opted to leave her cell only for meals, remaining there throughout the days and night.
* * *
Cairstine heard the commotion of Eoin’s return just after Compline on the second day of his absence. She caught muted cries of outrage before someone pounded on her chamber door. She unlocked it, and Eoin pressed his way in. His eyes raked over Cairstine, taking in her nervous expression before it relaxed when she recognized him. When she smiled, he gave in to temptation and pulled her into his arms, his mouth ravaging hers. Cairstine’s arms crept around Eoin’s neck as she matched his fervor with her own. His tongue pressed against the seam of her mouth, and she opened to him, welcoming the invasion of his tongue. She tilted her head, allowing Eoin to control the kiss.
Eoin was careful not to press Cairstine’s body against his aching cock. His hips demanded that he thrust his rod against Cairstine’s mound and search for the satisfaction it craved, but he reminded himself of what had happened the last time. His hands tingled with a need to roam over her body, but he refused to ruin the moment by scaring her. Certainly not after they’d been separated for two days while he handled the man who’d done just that: scared her by touching her.
Cairstine sighed as she felt safe for the first time since she’d discovered the abbot waiting for her in the covered walkway of the cloister. She knew the calm she now experienced was because of Eoin. She’d been safe once the abbot left the grounds, but anxiety had possessed her as she sat alone in her cell. She moaned her complaint as they eventually pulled apart.
“You’re back,” Cairstine offered lamely.
“I am, lass. And I’m taking you away from here in the morn. I’d do it now, but it’s too risky to make you ride in the dark. The road north out of the town is uneven and rutted, and I don’t want any of our horses to go lame. I already tempted fate enough by riding out and returning here in the dark.”
“But if the abbot isn’t here and won’t likely return soon or often, why can’t I stay?”
“Cairstine, Compline just ended, and you should have still been with the others as they left the chapel. Instead, you’re here. Mother Abbot told me you locked yourself away in here while I was gone because of the rumors swirling aboot. They’ve already labeled you for crimes you didn’t commit. We both know that, and that’s why you’re alone in here. You’ll be miserable if you stay, and I can’t guarantee the abbot, or some other equally horrid monk, won’t come here. I can’t protect you here and neither can your guards.”
Eoin took both of Cairstine’s hands in his, running his thumb over the back of hers. He gave them a gentle squeeze before continuing. “This was never going to work, Cairrie. Without your dowry, even if Mother Abbess agreed to you joining the order, the others would resent you for being able to join for free. Some would resent you for not contributing your share to sisters’ livelihood, and others would resent you because their families had to buy their way into here and you didn’t. Either way, they won’t welcome you, no matter what Mother Abbess says. I’m sorry, Cairrie, but you ken I’m right.”
“I know, Eo. I just wish it weren’t so. How can I return home now? Do I return to court? What do I say to the queen or to my parents? I feel even more lost than I did before.” Cairstine sniffled, then sighed. “I must tell my mother and father the truth and pray that they’ll allow me to retire to another convent, or if they permit me to remain unwed, they’ll still let Fenella marry.”
“I don’t have an answer to that, but my men and I will join your guard and take you to Stirling or Freuchie.”
“With a messenger probably already there demanding a dowry for the church, my father is likely to come here and drag me back. I have no desire for that scene to take place at court. I will have to face my father, and I’d rather it be in his solar, so I can retire to my own chamber afterwards. I’ll send a missive to the queen, too.”
“Cairrie, why do you call me Eo? You’ve done it twice since we left Stirling.”
“Have I?” Cairstine’s brow furrowed as she tried to remember either time, but she couldn’t, so she shrugged. “I hadn’t realized that I had. I suppose for the same reason you call me Cairrie. It just fits.”
Eoin nodded, but his heart felt too full for his chest. He’d thought a great deal about Cairstine’ssituation as he rode to and from Brechin Cathedral. He considered asking her to marry him, to let him protect her and to reassure her that he accepted her past. But he wanted a proper marriage with a woman who wanted his affection and touch as much as he wanted to offer it. He wanted children of his own, and he couldn’t imagine ever forcing Cairstine into his bed to endure his attentions just for the sake of his wish to be a father. He didn’t see how they could ever reconcile what stood as a gulf between them. Instead, he kissed her forehead and stepped away.
“Be ready to ride out at first light,” Eoin said before slipping from the cell, leaving Cairstine wishing she were back in his arms again.
Perhaps being married to a mon like Eoin wouldn’t be so bad. But he’s already said he doesn’t want me, or at least not a fake betrothal. Our marriage would be fake too since I just don’t think I can ever let him or any mon touch me the way he would want to touch his wife. Why can’t all men be as understanding and kind as Eoin? Cairstine pulled the meager blanket over her as she laid on the cot. She was asleep before her roommate returned for the night.
Chapter Thirteen
Eoin, Cairstine, and their six guards rode through the gates of Dundee Priory just before dawn, and none of them looked back. The weight of worry lifted from Cairstine’s shoulders, even if only temporarily. They rode north for several hours before cutting west to go around the Cairngorm Mountains, taking the less treacherous route. They would still have to navigate several mountain passes, but they were safer than going the other route. In theory, the eastern route should take a day less than the way they traveled, but the narrow paths along the mountain ledges forced all riders to proceed with caution. The steep inclines and declines wore the horses out sooner, and the inevitable anxiousness of rider and mount meant the
y couldn’t cover as much ground each day.
As the sun rose overhead, Cairstine tipped her head back, enjoying the sunshine on her face and neck. She breathed the unfettered air of the Highlands, something she never enjoyed in Stirling and hadn’t experienced in Dundee. As the rolling hills of bluebells and heather spread before her, Cairstine felt more at home than she ever had living at court or even in her clan’s keep. She never minded sleeping outdoors when she traveled, preferring it despite the discomfort. She marveled at the night sky, the enormous expanse of stars and the unknown, just as she did the majesty of the Cairngorms, whose peaks often sat within the clouds.
“When I was a wean, I was certain the fae lived within those clouds,” Cairstine point to the cloud-hidden mountain peaks. She looked at Eoin as she spoke. “I thought they sent down the clouds, so people couldn’t see them playing and casting their spells. I used to ask Bram if he would take me to visit them.”
Cairstine turned to smile at her most trusted guard, who had been more a father to her than her own sire. He’d taught her to hunt and ride; he even taught her to swim. He’d been at her side virtually every day of her life until she moved to court. There, she only saw him when she could go out for a ride or when she traveled. But at home, he was a constant companion, a guardian angel. She’d learned to hold her requests to explore until the afternoons when Bram finished training. She’d felt guilty when, at ten-years-old, she learned that her wishes to leave the confines of the bailey wall before the nooning equated to demands. She was the laird’s daughter, and the warrior had no choice but to acquiesce. She realized that her curiosity and restlessness took time away from the guard’s valuable training and practice. She also realized that while he was kind to her and patient, he was still performing a duty he’d been assigned. But regardless of the reason he accompanied her, he had become a friend and trusted confidante, and she was grateful for it.
“Lady Cairstine was quite insistent that if we sneaked up the mountain while the stars were out, we could arrive at the summit before the morning mist settled. She was certain she would spot the fae if only she arrived before them,” Bram chuckled at the memory. His weathered face appeared paternal as Eoin watched the experienced warrior grin at Cairstine. Their affection for one another was obvious, and it lightened Eoin’s spirit to know Cairstine had at least one man in her life who cared for her, perhaps even modeling how a man should treat women. He suspected Bram was as honorable in his personal life as he was as a guard.
“Fingal ruined it!” Cairstine exclaimed, and Eoin’s head whipped around to her. “He ruined it the one time Bram agreed to take me. Fingal insisted upon joining us, but he stomped around like an ogre and scared all the fae away.” Cairstine pretended to pout, but she succumbed to her giggles, and her laughter proved infectious to all the men traveling with her.
“There is an ancient druid standing stone the Picts left behind hundreds of years ago that is less than a day’s ride from Huntly,” Eoin looked off into the distance as if he could see the monolith or his home. “It is as tall as one and a half of me with markings carved into it. Who knows what they mean? One looks much like a comb, and another like a looking glass. There is a symbol that looks like someone slashed the stone with their sword.” Eoin made a z-shape motion with an imaginary sword. “There are creatures that look half-mon and half-breast, but perhaps more beast than aught else. It stands near Garioch, and the locals call it the Maiden Stone. When we were weans, Ewan and I insisted that it was the entrance to the fae kingdom. We begged our father to let us make camp near there to see if we could spy them emerging from their secret world. Funnily enough, it was our mother who refused our wish, saying she couldn’t bear the thought of them carrying us away, never to be seen by mon nor beast again.”
A wistfulness came over Eoin as he recalled part of the memory he hadn’t thought of in years. He’d nearly forgotten how upset his mother became as she feared her sons could be lost forever. It had seemed so incongruous with a woman who refused any superstition that didn’t support her faith. Cairstine noticed Eoin seemed to float away into his own world of memories, but a slight smile played at the corners of his mouth.
* * *
Eoin watched as Cairstine walked past him, clutching a bar of soap. “No late-night swims this time, lass,” he chuckled.
Cairstine paused and slowly turned toward him, narrowing her eyes. “If you’d left me alone, I wouldn’t have fallen over. You distracted me.”
“I thought it was the owl that did that,” Eoin grinned.
“The owl was only able to distract me because you’d already distracted me. If you’d left me alone, I wouldn’t have fallen over.”
“You already said that,” Eoin pointed out.
“It bore repeating since it’s true. Please excuse me. I’d like to be done before it grows too late.” Cairstine turned toward the river they camped near, but Eoin stepped in front of her.
“You’re not going down there alone, Cairrie,” he murmured as he blocked her path.
“I don’t need a nursemaid,” Cairstine huffed.
“I agree you don’t. But you do need someone to guard you while you’re vulnerable. Someone or something could attack while you're undefended. That dirk won’t do you much good if they overpower you.”
Cairstine blanched, and Eoin wanted to kick himself. He might have spoken the truth, but he could have phrased in a way that didn’t remind Cairstine so bluntly of what had already happened to her once.
“Fine. I’ll ask Bram to accompany me.”
“No,” Eoin barked, grasping Cairstine’s bent elbow. He knew this visceral reaction was uncalled for, but the possibility that another man might see Cairstine in the same state of undress as he had the night she drenched her chemise had him seeing red. It didn’t matter that Bram was more like her father than a suitor. “I’ll take you.”
Cairstine was prepared to argue, but Eoin’s jaw twitched, and she knew it would do her no good to protest. She could either allow Eoin to guard her or go without the wash, and she felt too grimy to give up the opportunity. “Very well but keep your back turned.”
“But I was going to offer to scrub your back,” Eoin offered her one of his seductive grins that she hadn’t seen since they left court. A flutter in her belly settled into an ache in her core. She didn’t understand why at times he had such an effect on her. She thought she’d grown immune to his charms, but when he directed his irresistible smile at her, she melted. It was what had earned him more than one kiss from her when he visited court, and she was certain it had earned him entry into many women’s beds. The image of him climbing into bed with another woman soured her mood just as surely as did the image of her being bedded by any man. She recognized that it was illogical, but she couldn’t stop her thoughts. She nodded and stepped forward, forcing Eoin to move out of her way. They walked to the river in silence, and Eoin turned away as she undressed. He didn’t look over his shoulder until he heard her splash into the water. He glimpsed a perfectly formed creamy backside before her shift fell low enough to cover it as she tied it out of the way. He whipped his head around lest she catch him ogling her. When he heard several more splashes, he was certain she was washing her hair.
Eoin scanned the surrounding trees and riverbank as Cairstine bathed, but his gaze returned to her over and over. She was modest in how she bathed, but Eoin could see her legs up to her mid-thighs. They were shapely and strong after years of riding. Water splashed down the front of her chemise as she rinsed her hair, making the cotton cling to her breasts. He felt his rod lengthening as he imagined wrapping her hair around his hand and kissing Cairstine along her throat as he thrust into her. His bollocks ached as he pictured wading into the river, throwing his plaid out of the way, and sinking in her once she wrapped her legs around his waist. He wanted to groan when she turned away from him, and he saw her hand and the soap dip beneath the chemise’s hem. He wanted to touch her sheath and listen to her pants as he pleasured her, but he ac
cepted that he wouldn’t be able to do that for a multitude of reasons. But the longing still existed.
“Are you satisfied that neither mon nor beast has mauled me?” Cairstine called out as she turned toward the bank. She’d known Eoin was on constant alert, but she’d sensed him watching her too. A tiny part of her had been tempted to be more brazen and show him more of her as she bathed, but while she trusted Eoin, she feared what her teasing might lead him to do. He’d been adamant that it wasn’t her fault that the young men attacked her that day at the gathering, but she wasn’t certain it wouldn’t be her fault if she tempted Eoin on purpose. Eoin ground his teeth as she neared the shore.
I’m not one bit satisfied at the moment. He reached out his hand when she stepped onto the riverbank. A charge surged through them, and their gazes leaped to one another. They’d both felt it. When Cairstine stood before Eoin, he rang out her sodden hair just as he had the last time they stood together on a riverbank, but this time, much to his dismay, Cairstine wasn’t in need of his plaid. He’d enjoyed the sight of her wrapped in his plaid far too much, and he pictured her like that now.
“Thank you,” Cairstine murmured, but she made no attempt to step away. It appeared she swayed toward Eoin, and when she tilted her chin up to meet his gaze once again, her lips parted. They moved in unison as their mouths came together for another scorching kiss. She fisted his leine as he dared pull her closer than he had before. He still kept their hips from pressing together, knowing she had to feel a hint of his arousal. She stilled, but she didn’t pull away, and he was certain she had. It was only a heartbeat later that she kissed him again. He moved his hands to rest lightly on her hips, and when she didn’t still, he slid his hands to cup her bottom. It was his turn to freeze when he couldn’t suppress his groan. Rather than frighten her, it seemed to encourage her.
A Rake at the Highland Court: The Highland Ladies Book Four Page 9
