by Clara Reese
She’s still just watching me but at least her face is changing. There are emotions and ideas flowing behind her eyes, that’s for sure. If it’s going to be a flat out ‘no’, I’d rather she just tell me. I need to come up with a plan if this one’s not going to work out.
I’m more invested in her answer than I expected to be. In the two minutes I spent fantasizing about this, I was really looking forward to spending time with her. Maybe if she doesn’t agree, I’ll be more upset than I bargained for.
“Gina? Please, say something.”
It feels like my world has changed far too much since I got out of bed this morning. It’s amazing what a few hours can do to turn your life upside down and send everything you care about rolling into the gutter.
6
Gina
I can’t even answer for a good few minutes. I know Dawn is eagerly awaiting my response, but I can’t even gather a thought, let alone a word. I’m completely stunned.
I’ve always wanted to be a Broadway star. Having Dawn’s backup sounds amazing. I’ve always had to rely on myself and hide how tired I was so that my family wouldn’t worry. There was no way I could go off and nomad around the different stages like other artistic types. With Carlo being sick and Dad dying, I had to stay with the family.
“Dawn…I don’t know.” It’s lame as hell but I really can’t think of anything to say.
“Sure you do.” She leans forward eagerly. I know that face. She’s going to pour on the honey until I agree. I see her do it all the time. I’m used to her energy and how persuasive she can be, but it still affects me.
She has an innocent exuberance about her that is intoxicating. Sometimes she takes it too far, but I think that’s just because she’s excitable and assumes everyone else does too. I’m still not even sure how I feel about this whole thing. Except shocked.
“Gina, just think about it,” Dawn says eagerly. “It would be great! We’re already such good friends. Living together won’t be a chore. It will be easy to convince everyone that we fell in love. We can say that we’ve been keeping it secret all this time.”
“What do you mean, ‘convince everyone’?”
“Well…” Dawn looks around while she gathers her thoughts. “The only way to stop my brother from creating legal problems is to make sure everyone believes it’s genuine. Like I said, we’d have to have a ceremony and a party. We would have to look the part.”
“Kissing? Hugging? Looking into each other’s eyes?”
Dawn pouts a little but I just frown.
“Well, yes, I suppose there would be some of that.” She at least has the grace to look uncomfortable.
“This ceremony...it would have to include our families, wouldn’t it?”
She nods. “No one can know the truth, Gina. No one. My brother is very good at getting information out of people. If there is any whisper anywhere that the marriage isn’t real, he’ll sniff it out.”
“I can’t, Dawn. I can’t lie to my family. We don’t do that.”
Her face falls. “Just a little lie? For me?”
“It’s not a little lie, Dawn.” My tone is getting hard, but I’m not raising my voice. “My mother and cousins would be over the moon for me. I couldn’t look into those happy faces and think about how I’m screwing everyone over.”
“We can always get a divorce.” She says it lightly but with a scowl. I frown a bit deeper, a little upset that she’s being so flippant.
“Look, Dawn, it’s tempting, okay? I’ve wanted to be on Broadway my whole life. Having someone stand by me and support me in that dream sounds amazing. The closest I’ve ever gotten to being onstage was constructing props. Technically, backstage. Not even on it. But that’s not enough, Dawn. I can’t play with my family’s feelings like that.”
“But why should we hold ourselves back?” She runs a hand through her golden hair, shaking it out in the sunlight. She is beautiful, and even more so when she’s animated like this. “We should go for our dreams. I deserve the chalet and you deserve to act on stage.”
“Well, there are no lesbian drama queen wannabe grants available. Money and time for my dream have always been in short supply.”
“That’s exactly what I’m saying, though.” She puts her hand softly on my arm. “I’m not asking much, not really. Not for what you’ll be getting out of it.”
“You don’t understand.”
“No, I really don’t.” Now she’s frowning and pouty.
A sigh creaks out of me and I wonder how I can impress upon her the gravity of the situation. From her perspective, it’s a small thing, a little act. I know she feels like she’s at the wall and she’s got to think of something fast. That’s the only reason she’s fixated on me like this.
After the heartache my family has suffered, I can’t ever lie to them. It’s just not a possibility. The very idea makes my heart feel heavy and sharp.
“Dawn...I wish I could make you understand.” Her face softens but she doesn’t back down. “My family are in a fragile state. My brother is very sick, and it’s been hard since Dad died. This kind of news is not small potatoes to them.”
Confusion or doubt crosses her features and she sits back a little, taking her hand off my arm. She looks away, eyes searching the floor.
“I’m sorry, Dawn.” I really do feel bad. But I feel kind of used, as well. All that I ever wanted is hanging there in front of me but it’s impossible to grab. I’ve got my fair share of anger over this. Does she think I can just drop everything and become her wife?
I’m really feeling like I need to take off. I want to get away from her before she can relentlessly urge me to comply with her wishes. I want to go and see Carlo and clear my head.
I keep biting my tongue, so I don’t say some of the hurtful things that are waiting on my tongue. I’m not angry with her, not really. I know she’s just trapped in a corner and for a few seconds she saw me as her way out. I’m trying not to hold that against her.
It just hurts though. I did have a few moments there where my head was full of glamour and excitement. I saw the lights, heard the roaring crowd.
Fuck it. I’m used to not getting what I want. This is just another incident to be filed under missed opportunities. Best forgotten.
“So, Dawn. Are we working on the place today?”
“Hmm?” She snaps back to the table from wherever she was, thinking about her problem. “What did you say?”
“Are we working on the building today?”
“I don’t know. I’m pretty rattled. There’s a few workmen coming through.”
“I say we take off and start with fresh eyes tomorrow.”
She shrugs. “Sounds okay.”
All that excitement has just bled away from her. She looks dull and defeated. I didn’t want to do that to her, but it’s not like I had a choice. I’m not doing this to hurt her, I just can’t go through with it for my own reasons.
“Alright then. I need to get going.” I stand up from the table, still wearing quite a bit of indignation. I don’t think she can understand how I feel, seeing the stage that close to me and then having it yanked away.
I suppose that’s how she feels with her brother’s plot to get the chalet. I’m not sure it’s the same thing, but I do consider her feelings as best I can.
“I’ll talk to you later, okay?”
“Yeah, sure,” She says flatly. “Later.”
I leave the building with a little shake of my head. I can’t help thinking that we are such good friends, this thing could actually work. The way we exchanged words right now may have been a bit frosty, but never once did either of us doubt the friendship. We’ve seen it all with each other and even though we sometimes disagree, we always make up right away.
I feel a kind of desperation as I get out to the car. I feel like I want to run back in there and accept. Thinking about Carlos and my family strengthens my resolve. It’s not just about me. It’s about my family, too.
As I jump in th
e car I think about my brother. Mother is probably with him and a few others too. It will be like a little celebration and I can’t wait to get there.
I need to take my mind off this stuff with Dawn. If I think too hard about it, I’m going to go nuts and do something stupid.
Like marry her.
7
Dawn
I shouldn’t have asked Gina for such an outlandish favor. It was impulsive and rash. Marriage! How absurd! We don’t even really know each other. Sure, we’ve been working together for close to a year now, but we’ve always kept the relationship completely professional.
She had every right to be upset. I probably would have felt the same way if I was on the other side of this. It isn’t her problem. She didn’t cause this. She definitely doesn’t deserve to be saddled with the responsibility to help me fix it.
Even though we would both benefit from such an arrangement, it’s a ridiculous notion. I can’t expect her to put her life on hold, to lie to her family, to lie to the world, just for me. What kind of a person asks someone to do that? A desperate one, I guess. I can feel the desperation, hot and reckless, as it pulses through my veins, and it makes me want to scream.
This entire situation is crazy! I’d like to find whoever concocted that stupid codicil and strangle them with my bare hands. Well, maybe that’s going a little bit too far, but seriously...I’ve put entirely too much time and too much money into this project to have it ripped away on something so unreasonable as a technicality.
If I had known when I first started this project that there would be any stipulations, maybe I would have had enough time to come up with a sensible solution. Hell, if I had known even a few months ago, I probably would have had time to come up with, at least, a somewhat feasible plan. Now, with only a month left…four lousy weeks…how am I supposed to fix this?
Opening the doors that lead to the side patio, I walk out and follow the path at the base of the steps. The fresh mountain air fills my lungs as I take in deep breathfuls. I pause, closing my eyes, as the scent of pine and earth surround me. The sensation is comforting, taking me back to a time when I was so much younger, so much more innocent to the wicked and unfair ways of the world.
There’s an open gazebo on the west side of the chalet grounds. When I reach it, I plop down into one of the Adirondack style chairs facing the not-so-distant surrounding mountain range.
The foliage is a vibrant green that blurs together a dozen different shades, cutting across my property and snaking up the adjacent slope to the level crest before breaking across the peak. The sky is a bright shade of cyan with a few wispy white clouds scattered across its vast canvas. Even after all these years, the view still manages to steal my breath away. I close my eyes and let the sun warm my cheeks as tears prick behind my eyelids. I remember the first time Uncle Arthur brought me here.
I was only six and small for my age, even then. I was mesmerized by the sheer magnitude of the chalet. To me, it seemed like a castle. But the view…the view was something else entirely. I’d never seen anything like it, and when Uncle Arthur sat me down, in this very spot, I knew anything he was about to tell me would be important.
Uncle Arthur understood me before I was even old enough to understand myself. I had always known I was a little different from the other girls my age, that I didn’t quite conform to what society thought of as normal. I was too young, perhaps too naïve, to put words to my feelings, but he knew.
He never tried to steer me one direction or another. Instead, he stood back, offering me encouragement when I needed it, and words of wisdom when necessary. He was kind enough to let me figure out who I was for myself, and when I did, he was there to offer me comfort.
I remember when he told me that it would not be an easy life, but not to let that discourage me from following my heart. He said that by staying true to myself, I would have the richest, most fulfilling life possible, even if at times it seemed hopeless. He was the only person in my family who ever made me feel like it was okay to truly be myself.
Uncle Arthur was the only person I ever looked up to. He loved this place with a passion I never knew was possible. I want to make it something he would be proud of. I refuse to let him down. And when I think of all the women I could help here, my heart breaks at the thought that I might let them down, as well.
My phone lets out a shrill cry, jerking me from my rumination. The name that lights up the screen causes an audible groan to seep from my lips. I’m not sure I can handle this right now, but I plaster a fake smile on my face, clear my throat, and swipe across the screen.
“Larry, what a surprise!” I say cheerfully, trying desperately to keep the sarcasm from my tone. “To what do I owe the pleasure of your call?”
“Oh, sweetheart,” he purrs. His voice is coated in syrupy sweetness. “I just heard the news. I can’t tell you how sorry I am.”
Of course you can’t, because you’re not. I don’t say the words aloud, even though they’re sitting right there, on the tip of my tongue, threatening to cannonball out into the atmosphere. “I’m not sure what you’re talking about,” I say instead. The sentence sounds lame even to my own ears. Playing dumb might not be my strong suit.
“About the codicil, silly. You have my deepest condolences,” he laughs, and it grates across every nerve, like fingernails on a chalkboard. It’s all I can do to keep from cringing, even though he isn’t here to see it.
“Oh, that,” I say, forcing nonchalance. “I’m not worried about that.”
“You have no reason to be. I know what the chalet means to you. If worse comes to worse, I won’t let any of the hard work you’ve put into the place go to waste. I have big plans for the chalet, after all.” I want to reach through the phone and choke the smugness right out of his nasty mouth.
“What are you talking about?” There might be a bit of venom in my tone, but I’ll never admit to it out loud.
“My country club, of course. You’ve made excellent progress with the renovations. The value must have skyrocketed by now, and with your improvements, it’ll be a piece of cake to get it turned around and ready to open in no time.”
I can’t even speak. The nerve of this…this…cretin! I hang up the phone, further pissed that I can’t actually slam it down the way they used to be able to do to hang up on people deserving so much worse than just an explosion to their eardrum.
I sit in the chair seething, positive that if I hadn’t hung up when I did, I wouldn’t have been able to keep my mouth shut. My fingers twitch with the desire to call him back and tell him exactly what I think about him and his plans. That would only make things worse, though, and if I say what I want, I might have to wash my own mouth out with soap.
I set my phone on the table next to me, as far away as possible. The temptation is too great, and I don’t want to make things worse than they already are. I’ll be damned if I let that arrogant, manipulative, ethically-challenged jackass destroy my dream and what I’m trying to accomplish here.
I’m going to make this work! If I have to die trying, I will find a way to turn this situation around. I reach for my phone again, pulling open my list of contacts. There has to be someone in here who would be willing to marry me.
It wouldn’t have to be forever, just long enough to appease the conditions of the codicil and get the chalet completely in my name. After that, none of it will matter anymore. My partner in crime will be free to go her separate way, and I’ll have made my uncle proud.
I can’t imagine he would actually want me to fail. There’s a small part of me that questions why he would even put this type of stipulation in the will to begin with. He’s never tried to push me into anything before.
Why would he wait until he was dead to do it? Even though it nags at the back of my mind, I don’t have time to think about it too hard. I have work to do.
8
Gina
Pulling into a nearby diner, I lean my forehead against the steering wheel. Dark curls tumble around my
cheeks, creating a cavernous enclosure that blocks out the world beyond my van. If only I could hide in here for a little while and forget about all the problems that lie waiting for me beyond these rusty metal walls.
My mind is a mess. My body feels entirely too old to be saddled with so much responsibility. First the situation with my family, and now this nonsense with Dawn. Marriage! A fake marriage, at that! Who ever heard of such a scenario?
I can’t believe that Dawn would court such an irrational idea. We don’t even really know each other. We’ve haven’t been working together for that long. Even though I think she’s cute and her personality is all fire and passion, I make it a rule to never get involved with someone I work with.
Something bad always ends up happening, or someone’s feelings end up hurt. Then, not only the relationship, but the job, as well, end up simultaneously exploding. I have too much going on to take that kind of chance.
God! She can be so impulsive sometimes…impulsive, passionate, funny, gorgeous...boss...she’s my boss. That’s what I focus on as I unfold myself from the van and head for the door of the diner.
Maybe breakfast will help put more clarity on the situation, and I can help Dawn come up with some kind of plan to fix this mess. It’s never good to make decisions on an empty stomach, anyway. At least, that’s what my grandmother always said. Too bad she isn’t here to help with Carlo. Even she couldn’t possibly think that food would solve that mess.
The bell on the door jingles out a cheerful tune as I step inside. The sweet aroma of waffles and syrup, along with the greasy scent of bacon, immediately assault my nose and make my mouth water. An older woman, with gray curls pulled up in a frizzy bun, looks up from behind the counter. Her eyes are tired, but the smile that creases her face is genuine.
