by Santos, Anna
“I didn’t want a mate, Jo,” I explained, with my face against her breasts, profoundly inhaling her perfume. Even if I wasn’t going to confess it, I had missed her. She had been the only person who was kind to me when I was a human. She had been my maker, my mom, my sister, my everything for a long time.
“You messed up this time, Philippe,” she said, ignoring my words as if they were a tantrum. “No one can live as long as we do without someone to love, someone to care for us.”
“You did,” I said.
“I had you for a long time, and you had me. I had others before you. I have another now,” she whispered. I was unsure if she was trying to make me jealous or make me feel better. “Though you were broken, dear, even like that, we had each other. That was what allowed you to survive after her death and after your revenge. But, we are no longer suited as such. Our love has ascended to another level. But, Philippe, a mate’s love is different. It’s eternal.”
“She was not suited for me. She was...too innocent.”
“You were also innocent, once,” she said with a soft smile.
I shook my head, depression settling in me with her words. “You know that I wasn’t allowed to be innocent. My whore of a mother made sure of it.”
“You are a survivor. Stop sulking about your past, stop putting yourself down!”
I growled at her. “You were never a good listener.”
“And you were always too sentimental,” she claimed, making me clench my jaw.
“Have you just come here to annoy me?” I got away from her arms and stood from the armchair.
I stared intensely into her green eyes, intrigued by her smile. My past was not a joking matter. And she had no right to call me sentimental when she was the one who left me behind because I was too ruthless for her taste. My maker abandoned me, as everybody else had in my rotten existence.
“I have come here to ask something of you, and to see how you were doing,” she admitted.
“I knew there was more to this than a mere social call. What do you need?”
“I want you to arrange an audience with the prince of the Angels and the Gargoyles.”
“For what?” I asked, both intrigued and shocked at the same time.
“It is personal, and it really doesn’t concern you. I’ve spent decades in search of something, and now I need to talk to the only person who can help me.”
“He is not friendly with vampires. I don’t think he will be of much help for whatever sordid plan you have.”
She raised her hand to touch my cheek with caring eyes. “Let me worry about that. I just need you to arrange the meeting.”
“And if I don’t?” I asked stubbornly.
She sighed. “Stop being such a child. I know you will do what I ask, even if you are a conceited prick who just screwed up your chance at happiness.”
Fisting my hands, I growled at her, “You were the one who told me that I just had to reject the girl and I would be fine.” Anger for her not taking responsibility bubbled in my stomach. She should have advised me better and stopped being the one always to point the finger.
“For the bloodlust not about the rest. I didn’t even know you were talking about your mate. You just condemned your soul to hell by rejecting her,” she said, gesturing her hands, exasperated.
I pointed an accusing finger at her. “Fuck you, Jo! You condemned my soul to hell the moment you turned me, and I killed for the first time. Do you think that those kinds of fairy tales will scare me? For all, I know this is hell, right here, in this fucking cursed place!”
“You could leave this place,” she said, her voice coming out calm. She glided to the canapé and sat there with all the elegance of a feline. Aiming her eyes at me, she added, “There isn’t anything else in this damn house for you. She is gone. She isn’t coming back.”
“Shut up!”
Jo’s eyes became dark as she lost her temper. “I’m your master! You shut up, ungrateful child!”
I sighed and put my hands in my pockets, looking miserable because I was arguing with the only person who fully understood me.
“I’m sorry, Jo,” I whispered, trying to make amends. “I know you are right. I’ve just...grown used to this place. But I know you’re right.”
Crossing her legs, she said, “Your mate could make you forget everything, darling.”
“Don’t be so naïve, Jo. Love can’t fix everything. You are too damn romantic for a five-hundred-year-old vampire. And you call me a child.”
“Really, Philippe?” she asked sarcastically as she folded her arms and stared at me as if I was an idiot.
“Really.”
“So, if Sophie would miraculously appear before you and ask you to leave everything behind to be with her, you would send her away?”
“She’s dead. She isn’t coming back.”
“What do you know? She could be watching you from the shadows since you won’t let her soul rest. She could be grieving because you are destroying yourself.”
“The girl would end up hating me. I really don’t need a mate. She is better off without me.”
“Did you ever stop to think about what a selfish mistake you made would do to your soul-mate?”
“Do you really think I could make anyone happy?” I asked, losing my temper with her lack of understanding about why I had to reject Aria.
Her face hardened when she aimed her enraged gaze at me. “She was yours! Only yours. She was the person who would love you, no matter what mistakes and sins you have on your conscience. She was the only one who could save your fucking useless soul from hell!”
I walked to her, my fangs coming out as I yelled, “I destroy everything I touch! I don’t need anyone to save me from my fucking ghosts! I love my ghosts! And I don’t want anyone to...”
She got up and put her hand on my shoulder. “To what, baby? To love you? To replace Sophie? Do you understand how screwed up and hurt you are? Do you comprehend how mad you sound?”
“But I am mad. I’m fucking crazy, and I don’t need your bullshit. I don’t need to damage an innocent, sweet girl with my hate for humanity. And, as for the Gods, I don’t need a mate to try to fix me. You said that, remember Jo? You said the hurt would stop, that my demons would eventually stop following me, and I would rise above it. Well, I have risen. I’m the fucking ruler of the vampires. I have a title. I have a name! But I’m a fucking vampire, and it’s too damn late to wish for a love I had already and was taken from me!”
“Watch your words. I taught you to curse less,” she said with a calm voice and serious face.
“You taught me a lot of things. One of those things was to survive,” I said, getting close to her as I kneeled in front of her emerald eyes. I smirked, trying to calm myself. “You taught me love was overrated, that people hurt us and want to take advantage. You taught me to kill my enemy before he could kill me. I’m just putting into practice what I have learned.”
Pushing me back, she declared, “She was not your enemy. She would have been the only person whom you could trust.”
“And the only person my enemies could use against me. What do you think that the specters, angels, werewolves, and the other vampires would do to her if she were my only weakness?”
“So, you were doing her a favor, were you?”
“Yes, I was,” I said, putting my hands on her face. “Now, stop trying to make me feel bad. It isn’t going to work,” I whispered. “Be a good lover and show me what you have learned while you were away,” I demanded mischievously.
“I’m taken, Philippe. My new consort is waiting for me downstairs,” she said, taking my hands off of her face and refusing to play with me. “And I’m not going to help you ignore your hollowness with casual sex. You have plenty of that downstairs to keep you busy.”
I growled at her response. “What is he this time? A sheik? A rock star?” I knew she liked rich men to please her every need.
“He is an Alpha.”
I arched an eyebrow in disbelief. �
�A mutt? Are you out of your mind?”
“His mate died a few years back. We have a sexual and economic relationship that pleases us both. Besides, werewolves and vampires are no longer enemies. At least, not as fierce as before. You need to adapt to these new times. Actually, we’ve come to Paris to attend a party.”
“Hmm,” I said, not interested.
“It was my understanding that you were also invited.”
“The Alpha’s son’s birthday party? I don’t like to be surrounded by so many mutts in one place. I don’t think I’ll go. Unless you care to abandon your consort,” I said, almost spitting the word consort because I despised it greatly. “And go with me.”
“Don’t you have some slut to go with you?”
“Probably,” I said, shrugging my shoulders as I got up from the floor and dusted my clothes off. I had no idea which girls were living in my house. They would come and go. I didn’t keep track. I was more interested in their blood than in their company. Besides, Samuel took care of them and sent them away once I got what I needed. He was a good butler and a dear friend.
“I saw a red-haired girl downstairs. Cute. I see you still have a soft spot for redheads.”
“She’s not naturally red,” I said. “And she is quite…dull. I think I picked her up yesterday. I really can’t remember. This lack of sleep is getting to me. I want to sleep without dreaming,” I whispered, rubbing my eyes.
“Are you dreaming of her?”
“More about the rejection than her.”
“Some part of you that is still human is condemning you for what you did. Deep inside, you wanted to be loved.”
“Don’t be silly.”
“So, you don’t feel any remorse about what you have done to the girl?”
“I couldn’t care less about her.”
“Then it is okay if I tell you that you condemned her soul to hell, also?”
“What?” I asked. Shock caused my eyes to widen. The blood raced to my heart, and my hands fisted.
“You condemned her soul to hell, you idiot!” Jo repeated slowly so that I could catch the meaning of each word. “I hope you are happy. Just get me the damn meeting with the prince. I have to get prepared for a party,” she hissed, staring at me as if I were the worst person in the world. “Hey, at least you will be able to join her there when you are no more,” she added, mocking me with a sarcastic tone.
Letting out a long heavy sigh, she headed out of my bedroom, leaving me alone with my demons.
Chapter FOURTEEN
ARIA
Shopping for clothes could be fun with a good friend to advise you and a fantastic boyfriend to make you feel like the most beautiful girl in the world. It was magical, for lack of a better word to describe my afternoon with Cedric, Camille, and Jacob. I liked spending time shopping, and I used to hate it!
Camille knew the best shops and the prettiest clothes to fit my figure. She helped me pick out new underwear that would show off my curves. She was also a tease with Jacob, making me blush by how much they kissed in public, and how sweet they talked to each other. They were completely in love, and Jacob couldn’t conceal it, even when he tried to be less affectionate with her. I wished that Cedric and I could be in love like that. But we had only known each other for a couple of days. We didn’t have the type of intimacy that Camille and Jacob had. Even if Cedric held hands with me and made me feel special and desired. He was so perfect!
I just agreed to go shopping because I needed clothes, and I couldn’t go and get mine. I also needed a girl to go with me who was able to speak French, understood my simple taste in clothes, and gave me an honest opinion. But, as it turned out, angels could comprehend all the languages and were understood by others no matter what language they spoke. So, I could talk to others and listen to what they were saying in French and fully understand it all. How awesome was that?
It would seem that Cedric and I made a cute couple because a lot of people stared at us and that made me feel uncomfortable. It was also new to me to realize that girls would gaze at Cedric in awe and would envy me. And men would turn their heads to watch me pass as if I was beautiful. I guess I was attractive now. I had gorgeous long red hair, which happened to be perfectly wavy. I loved how it framed my face, making it look flawless and glowing. But, other than that, I felt the same. I was plain old Aria with perfect skin and a new hair color. I didn’t understand what the fuss was all about, and why I looked more attractive to others. I didn’t feel any different. I was still shy, an introvert, and a dreamer. Maybe it was because I had a gorgeous guy holding hands with me, so people thought there was something special about me. I mean, any woman who could date that blond-haired, blue-eyed piece of heaven should have something special, right?
Even though I was shy at first from the attention, I eventually relaxed. I started to ignore the prying eyes of people in general so that I could focus on my happiness and Cedric. I loved to talk to him. He was brilliant, and he understood my jokes and didn’t complain about me being a know-it-all. We were able to have clever conversations. Cedric was a source of knowledge, explaining everything about the places we visited and the French Culture. French people weren’t too different from Americans. In fact, they were a lot alike. It was hard to explain. They weren’t the stereotypical people movies portrayed. They were just people, trying to be happy. Deep down, we were all the same. We may have other beliefs and moral standards, but we wanted to be happy and make the people we love happy. Cedric was trying to please me by buying me more clothes than I would ever use or need. When all I wanted from him was to hold hands, watch a movie, and eat ice-cream. That would be my perfect dream date. I was easy to please.
By the time we arrived home, the angels had brought the bags to my bedroom. I was extremely sore and tired. Cedric and Jacob went to take care of some business, regarding the Intel Jacob had ordered his spies to gather. And I was left with Camille, staring at the fancy bags, and trying to get my energy up to put the new clothes in the closet.
“There should be some sort of spell that angels could cast so that things would be arranged properly in their places.” I sighed, taking off my shoes and falling back on the armchair. “I'm beat. I don’t think I have ever put on and taken off so many clothes and shoes in my life.”
“Yeah, it was fun,” Camille said, playing with a strand of her blonde hair.
She didn’t look tired. Maybe it was because she was a supernatural. Maybe angels had more stamina. I was not an angel yet. My transformation had barely begun, so to me, the day was exhausting. I was hoping to never shop for anything else again.
I think Camille overdid it. I had never had more than three dresses and like six pairs of jeans. I loved to buy t-shirts, especially those with witty quotes and cute logos. I was a bit nerdy that way. Now my clothes were fancy, all washable by hand, and made of silk or wool. My shoes were more expensive than my mom’s salary. I felt terrible, knowing that Cedric was paying it.
Camille didn’t even flinch, keeping me from looking at the price tags. She would pile up clothes and send Cedric to pay as if it was the most natural thing in the world. She claimed I was a princess, and I would have to attend a lot of parties and receptions, so I couldn’t look bad. I would just nod and sigh nervously. I didn’t want to seem rude nor did I want to make Cedric think I wasn’t trying to be a good mate by not putting in an effort to look good for him. He loved to see me do runways, showing him smart, cute dresses and fashionable outfits. It was priceless to watch real admiration in his eyes and hear the sweetest words from his mouth. He seemed like a boy in a candy shop, choosing what he wanted for me to wear from Camille’s options. So, I let them dress me like a doll and enjoyed the day shopping. I had fun, I can’t deny that, and I wanted to look good to please Cedric.
“Actually,” Camille said, “there are witches that can do that. But we have maids for that. So,” she stretched, “we need to get dressed.”
She smiled at me, giving me her hands and pulling me out of my
comfortable place. I just wanted to put my pajamas on and hop into bed, holding my pillow tight so I could rest. Why did we need to change clothes again?
Camille answered me as if she had read my thoughts, “We are going to a party. Alpha Jean-Paul is celebrating his son’s birthday, and Cedric must go. They are good friends, and everybody is eager to meet their future queen.”
“What?” I gasped. I wasn’t expecting that. Cedric hadn’t said anything about it.
“I’m glad we bought you so many cocktail dresses. I think the blue one will be perfect for tonight. It matches your mate’s eyes.”
I had an idea of what dress she was talking about. It was a mermaid tulle dress. I had loved how it had fit me like a glove. I felt sexy wearing it, and Cedric had liked it a lot when he saw me modeling it. He had immediately said yes to buying the dress, grabbing me from the floor to kiss my cheek, and making me feel both embarrassed and delighted. I had won a lot of kisses that day, all innocent and breathtaking. He was a gentleman, and I was too shy to turn my face and make him accidentally kiss my lips, or simply kiss him first. It would be wrong anyway. I wanted him to kiss me at the right moment, whenever that would be because I wanted to have a memorable first kiss like the ones in the movies.
Camille clapped her hands, and I woke up from my daydreaming. “I can do your hair and makeup. It will be entertaining! Would you like that?”
“Yes.” I nodded while my head was doing a lot of reruns of movies with fancy parties.
I was a modest girl with no idea how to behave at such gatherings. The last fancy party I went to, I ended up meeting my former soul-mate and being rejected. And it was not that long ago. At least, this time, I was going with my new awesome boyfriend, and I had a girl to help me with the details. My cousin wasn’t as excited as Camille had been to help me out. Thinking about it, I had almost forgotten about my family in Paris. If they were to see me on the streets, would they recognize me?
“Don’t you like the idea?” Camille asked. “We can get dressed in my bedroom. I can do a beautiful hairstyle fit for a queen for you. I have a lot of hair products and makeup. Have I told you that I love the color of your hair? Before I became an angel, I had always wanted to be blonde. I was a bit pathetic like that. I thought that blonde chicks had all the fun. I got my wish when I became Jacob’s soul-mate. But your red hair is awesome! What color was it before?”
