“What’s the reason?”
He went a little hard on the third stitch and Diego jumped.
“Sorry.”
“Fuck that, tell me what his reasoning was.”
After swallowing and slowing down on his stitching, he told Diego, “The fact that he could have slept with either one of us in that hotel, left his room and hit up either of us to fuck him, but he could have only counted on one of us to be there in the morning. You.”
Diego looked off at the wall while Gary finished the last stitch. Then he surprised him by saying, “Why don’t I think that’s the case any longer?”
It was true. Gary had felt what missing Tommy was like, and he hated it. He thought at first that he was just great in bed and fun to be around, nothing more. The longer those days went when they were together, though, the more he knew that he was falling in love for the first time in his life.
“Like I said, moot point now. He’s made his choice, and even I agree with it. So treat him good, make him happy, or I’ll fucking kill you.”
Another smile twitched his lips. “You’d like to kill me right now.”
“Tell me about it.”
When he was finished, Diego went into the bathroom to clean up and Gary found Tommy on the couch, asleep. He didn’t have a blanket, so Gary got his jacket from his pack and lay it over him. He was much bigger than Tommy, so it covered a good portion of him.
Diego walked up beside him. “He’s special.”
“Yeah. Hard knocks all his life. Only took people giving a shit about him to turn him around and make him…so good.”
“I guess we have the bunks.”
Gary laughed silently and purred, “I’ll take top.”
“Yeah, I figured you’d call top.”
“Always.”
He did climb to the top bunk, but Diego was taking the watch, so he lay alone in the room for the first three hours, and sleep refused to take him. He finished the pint and all that did was make his thoughts cascade into his tear ducts, making tears spill over his cheeks. He was facing the wall, in case Diego entered the room, but he couldn’t hide his shaking.
He’d run from Tommy, yeah, but he’d thought about him every minute of every damn day. The one guy who’d haunted his dreams, who was in his heart and refused to leave. That was Tommy.
When he’d found out Tommy had someone, it had hurt more than he thought anything could. No bullet or knife, no punch in the face had ever hurt him, and then one skinny young man comes along and tears him apart from the inside out and he went on a two-week bender.
After sobering up, he’d found a message from Crowley on his phone, but he’d ignored the message. It wasn’t until he lost the other person he loved that he thought about going back to Crowley, going on missions that would kill off what little remained of his soul.
And then, there he was, not only confronted with the guy he loved, but the one who’d gone in and picked up the pieces. He couldn’t compete with that. Diego didn’t leave, wouldn’t. Diego was one of those do-gooders that would spend his life making Tommy happy, which was exactly what he deserved.
If he had a brain in his head, or a little more of that soul he’d slowly been killing off all these years, he’d walk away when all of it was over and let the two of them be happy. He’d let himself be selfless for the first time in his life and let Tommy have true happiness instead of the constant anxiety Gary would leave him.
Every time he thought of him, though, Tommy’s shy but strong heart, he wanted to die at the thought of leaving him again. The one person who’d gotten in and refused to leave, and his selfishness won over once more. He wanted to stay, fight for Tommy, and come out the winner.
When it was his turn for watch, the whiskey had cleared from his head and he watched out of each window, grip tight on the rifle he held. All of the worry over whom Tommy would love in the end would be for not, as none of them would survive to get to that point if he didn’t come up with a plan to get them out of here.
Tommy woke at close to four in the morning, and without a word, took the rifle from him.
In the near-dark, Gary didn’t move from in front of him for a long time. They’d never needed words. Tommy’s eyes said more than his shyness would allow his voice to say most of the time. In those eyes, Gary saw it. He still had a chance. It may be slight, and Tommy may think he’d made up his mind, but there, as they connected again, Gary’s heart gave a heavy thump and he thought that maybe it wasn’t over yet.
He went to the bedroom and got on the top bunk, and this time, he let himself be taken by sleep immediately. It was maybe only a glimmer of hope, and possibly only an illusion at that, but it was all that was needed to let him rest.
****
The new light coming through the window told him it was early, maybe around five, but Diego rubbed his eyes and decided to get up anyway. He heard the gentle snores from above him and knew Gary was sleeping soundly, so he made his move to talk to Tommy without fear of being overheard.
Tommy was in the kitchen, a newly clean kitchen, and there were eggs on the stove and instant coffee sitting by three empty cups. “Instant. Maybe the first thing we do when we’re out of this mess and back in the states is to hit Starbucks.”
“Don’t mention Starbucks. I have been putting off drinking the instant as it is, but I need the caffeine.”
Diego took the water that was boiling gently in the pan and poured it into two of the cups, adding heaping spoons of the coffee to each. “I, uh, need to talk to you, babe.”
“About?”
Tommy took the coffee and blew on it before taking a sip. His eyes never left Diego’s and he knew they wouldn’t until he got it out. Tommy was like that, down to business, and curious as hell.
They sat together at the table and Tommy reached over to feather a finger over his swollen eye. “That looks painful.”
“It’s not too bad. Actually, it’s nothing compared to how much it hurts, thinking about what I’m going to say.”
“Wow, that serious? Better get it out then.”
He chuckled at that, knowing Tommy was serious, but he was straight forward. Diego tried to be, but at times like those, he stumbled. “Okay, yeah, get it out. Gary told me about you making your choice. He said you chose me.”
Tommy’s eyes lowered to the table and stayed there. That was the moment Diego knew he was right in doing what he was about to do.
“Yeah, well, I want you to take some more time with it. Your decision.” Tommy’s eyes met his again, but they were narrow, suspicious, and shocked. “I mean, I am so fucking happy that was your choice, I am, but things are changing, and I never want you to resent me, Tommy. I see the way you two look at each other. I’m not blind, and you don’t know now. You don’t know he wouldn’t be there in the morning, and because you don’t know, you’ll always wonder. Take your time. Doesn’t look like we’re going to get out of this anytime soon. I just can’t take the victory lap knowing that in a year or ten, you’ll look back and regret it.”
“I’d never regret being with you, Diego.”
“I’m not saying you would. I know you love me, babe. I just know you love him too, and when you’re stuck between two people, if you choose one too hastily, you will second guess yourself forever. I don’t win that way. We all lose that way.”
Tommy got up from his chair, coffee forgotten, and sat on Diego’s lap, holding him as he brought his mouth in to give Diego a soft kiss. “I do love you. I’d regret leaving you for him, but you’re right. I was already second guessing myself, and I hate myself for that. You’re the better choice by far.”
“As long as I’m still in the running, I’ll be happy, babe. The only thing in the world I truly want, though, when it is all over and you’ve chosen, is that you’re happy. That’s all I really want for you, whether it’s me that makes you that way…or him.”
Nodding against his cheek, he whispered, “Why does all of this have to be so hard and hurt so much?”
/> “Love isn’t the happy thing most dream it to be. It’s hard, it hurts, and it’s killed more people than any disease ever has, but that’s the thing. It’s worth it. To have that person in your life that loves you, really loves you, it’s all worth it.”
“I guess when he gets up, I should tell him.”
“Do when I’m not around. If I see him being smug, I may shoot him and end the whole thing real quick.”
Tommy laughed at that, and he did as well, but down deep, he knew he wasn’t kidding.
Chapter Nine
Gary got up thirsty, found the two casually sipping coffee in the kitchen and became instantly annoyed. He wasn’t one to analyze his feelings or he may have realized it was jealousy. The way they just fit together, the two of them, sitting like they belonged there…
“Has anyone bothered to check the perimeter lately, or is your coffee break more important?”
Tommy rolled his eyes at him and smarted, “We were waiting for orders, Captain.”
That made him chuckle and he went to the cup on the counter, scowling at the instant coffee. “How old are those eggs?”
“A couple hours. I can make some fresh.”
“I don’t need a fucking wife, Tom. I can make my own eggs.”
“Someone is cranky when he wakes up,” Diego quipped, then told Tommy, “I’ll leave you to tell him the good news. Maybe that’ll kill his shitty disposition.”
As he watched Diego leave the room, he thought again how he wanted to put a bullet in his head, but that would win him no points with Tommy. “What’s he talking about? Good news?”
“I’d tell you, but you’re in such a bad mood, I don’t know if you deserve it.”
After throwing out the old eggs, he started the pan heating as he crack two into it. “I don’t deserve a lot of things, Tom. What the fuck are you keeping from me? You found us a way out of this shitshow?”
He felt Tommy moving in behind him and he tensed. “No. I just wanted to tell you Diego talked me out of choosing him. He wants me to wait until I’m sure about both of you.”
His eyes closed and he felt his lungs seize, unable to take in air. The words hit him, but he focused on the wrong ones. When he could breathe again, he sneered, “Oh, did he? How fucking big of him.”
“Gary! Stop!”
He spun around and saw Tommy’s eyes with tears and his mood changed immediately. He let down his defenses and whispered, “Sorry. I’m sorry. The stress of all this, you, him, the fucking cartel…”
“I get that, but stop hating him. I can’t take it!”
It wasn’t so much that he hated him, he didn’t trust him. Something was off, and he’d kept that in the background of his mind, fearing it was only his jealousy over Tommy, but it wasn’t just that. “I’ll try, okay? And…for what it’s worth, I’m glad. I’m glad I might have another shot with you.”
“Well, you won’t if you don’t stop your shit with Diego. You might be competing with him, but you wouldn’t be if he hadn’t told me to give you another chance.”
It took everything he had not to smash his mouth to Tommy’s, but he didn’t want to push it. “Okay. Like I said, I’ll try. For you.”
Tommy swiped the back of his hand over his tears and smiled suddenly. “See, there’s that good guy you try so hard to hide.”
“Yeah, you and very few others get to see it, so keep my secret. I have a reputation.”
Once Tommy left the kitchen, Gary took his overcooked eggs from the heat and set them on one of the cleaner plates in the lone cabinet that barely hung on the wall. Once they were safe from burning, he took out his phone and kept his eye on the door to make sure he wasn’t disturbed.
Calling Lollie Madison, self-named, one of two women that were his go-tos for information gathering, he waited until she answered in her usual way, “What the fuck do you want?”
“Yeah, Lollie, Gary. I need a favor. I need a complete background check on a guy named Diego Gomez. I don’t have a date of birth, but he’s maybe thirty to thirty-five, lived in Rhode Island, has a few degrees, he says, in law and business. He’s related to Mia Guccia, cousin, who married Michael Montello. Other than that, he’s a fucking mystery. Change that for me, huh?”
“Not much to go on,” she said, but added, “I’ll have everything you need to know in an hour.”
“That long? You’re slipping.”
“Fuck you, corporal douchebag. I’ll lower your credit score, so they won’t even finance you a Japanese car on payments.”
“Ouch. That hurts. Thanks, Lollie.”
“Yeah, whatever.”
With that taken care of, he ate quickly and took his pistol to the backdoor, hollering to the other two, “I’m going to look around outside.”
Tommy ran into the kitchen and asked, “Need some help?”
“To look around? No. Call Javi and let him know we’re still safe and we need a fucking plan.”
“I thought you’d have one by now.”
He started out the door, growling, “Me too.”
The sun was hot as fuck and his mood was quickly getting worse. The nagging feeling that Diego was hiding something wouldn’t leave him. The jeep that had been chasing him had to be five hundred meters at least. Unless him hitting the driver, with the sun shining on the windshield, was a lucky shot, it took military training to get that good. That was a sniper shot.
No one that went out once in a while with an uncle was a crack shot like that.
The sweat pouring down his face didn’t bother him, but the horseflies that were buzzing around him that were the size of small tanks did. He checked over the area, and saw they were still clear to stay, at least another day. After that, they’d move on, for safety.
His phone jingled and he saw it was Javi. “Hey.”
“Gary, how are you? Tommy called, said everything was fine, but he didn’t sound fine.”
“We’re safe, if that’s what you’re asking. He’s with his ex and his current boyfriend, trying to make up his mind which one of us he wants the most.”
“Ouch. Gotcha. That’s not getting in the way of the rest of it, is it?”
Gary wanted to say a definite no, but he couldn’t lie like that. He didn’t think it was endangering them, but it was on their minds. “Javi, it is what it is, and we’re safe. I can’t promise more than that right now. Do you have any suggestions on how to get out of this? I mean, it’s been batted around that we pay them and get across somehow, hoping they won’t come after us. That makes the Montello family look weak, though. Might have more than them coming after you if we do that.”
“I thought of that, too. If we don’t, though, we risk them coming after us anyway. Daniel and I have been trying to figure some things out, and when we land on something, you three will be the first to know. Until then, I have a couple contacts down there too. When yours run dry, I have some backups.”
“Much appreciated. Hey, if you and Daniel don’t work out, can we go back to being fuck buddies? It was a much less complicated life back then.”
“Yeah, it was, but my complication makes me happy. So would yours, if you got your head out of your ass.”
Smirking, Gary reminded, “My complication has a complication of his own, Javi. Or did you forget that part?”
“No, but maybe you three should just jump in together. Would be hot.”
Retching, Gary groaned, “Fuck right off, Duran! I wouldn’t suck him with your mouth.”
“Your loss. Talk soon, asshole.”
“Back at you, dick.”
Tommy was napping when Lollie called back, and he left the living room where Diego was lying back on the couch. Once he was back outside with the heat and flies, he answered the phone.
“So?”
“Well, everything you told me was right on the money. He’s thirty-five, though, not three, but you were close enough. He does have multiple degrees in law and business, the highest is a Masters in law. He wanted to teach on the east coast, at least th
at what his yearbook stated, but he moved to Colorado a few months back. I’m guessing you knew that, too.
“Mother, Italian, part of the Guccia family, major crime syndicate, Father, Josiah Gomez, born in a little fishing village in Spain called Lastres. One sister, married to a man named Falconari.”
“Anything about military duty?”
“No, none. Though, it is strange that there are a few years he was off the grid entirely. He didn’t start college until he was twenty-five, and from high school to that age, I don’t have work records. There’s nothing on his social security anyway. I didn’t think much about it. He wasn’t rich, but his family was comfortable. Maybe he traveled for a few years before buckling down in school. I know some people that did something similar.”
That didn’t seem like him at all. He was all about responsibility and duty, at least that was how he acted. “Find out. Check to see if his passport was used during those years, rentals for apartments, if he purchased a car he may have traveled with. Check on his paternal uncle, one that supposedly was in special forces. I don’t know what branch but guessing Army. Anything, Lollie. Please.”
“I’m gonna charge you a fortune for this, but I’ll have it within another hour at the most.”
“Thanks, Lollie.”
He stuffed the phone back in his pocket and went inside, hoping he didn’t look as suspicious as he felt. Tipping off Diego that he was looking into his past, that would be bad enough, but letting Tommy know would be catastrophic. Unless and until he had something concrete, his search had to be kept under wraps.
Old habits are hard to break, however. Once he hit the living room, he leaned on the arch doorway and stared daggers at Diego.
Glancing over, Diego huffed, “What now?”
“Just wondering some things. Your uncle. How often did he take you shooting? You’re good.”
Diego shifted on the couch, then sat up completely, avoiding his eyes. “Enough. He took me enough. Anything else?”
“What do you mean? I was just wondering.”
Diego stood and tried to walk by him, but Gary got in his face, stopping his progress.
Tug of War (Legacy Book 5) Page 8
