by Elinor Glyn
CHAPTER XXIV
When Friday night came and Katherine was ready to get into the taxi withMiss Gwendoline d'Estaire, she felt exalted as she had never done in herlife.
This evening would be the test of her powers--If she failed, then shewould know that such high goals were not for her, and so she mustcurtail her aspirations. _But she would not fail._ It might be that theDuke would not be drawn to her--it was impossible to tell from that oneafternoon what his temperament could be--but at all costs she must notfail in being a cultivated lady, a guest among equals, and so to take atleast that place in his regard.
There was something almost diabolically whimsical in the fact that onepassionate would-be lover was deliberately arranging that his ladyshould meet a possible rival! Gerard Strobridge appreciated this pointas he stood before the cheerful wood fire in the morning-room in BrookStreet, awaiting his guests.
The bores, of course, came first, and then Katherine and old MissGwendoline d'Estaire, and last of all, not more than five minuteslate--His Grace.
He was quite abnormally distinguished looking in evening dress, whichwhen dissected did not prove to be remarkably different from that of theothers, but which yet possessed some subtle quality entirely apart fromtheirs, in its bygone suggestion. His manners were most courtly; herecognised Katherine at once and shook hands with her. And then dinnerwas announced.
Gerard sent the lady bore in with the Duke--himself taking oldGwendoline, and leaving Katherine to the husband, so that Katherine satnext His Grace at a little round table.
She was looking quite beautiful in a new black frock, as simple as theold one, and with some of her favourite lilies of the valley tucked intothe belt. Mordryn felt constrained to talk to his partner until afterthe fish--the host, by a tactful interruption, drew away her attentionand left him free, and then without hesitation he turned to Katherine.
Her heart was beating fast, and the excitement made her eyes dark andher cheeks pale, but she did not lose her head, and indeed felt an extrastimulant to her brain power.
He began about the debate on Wednesday. The whole thing was rather amockery since they were robbed of all power now in the House of Lords,and could only make mild protests, but not enforce their opinions. WasMiss Bush interested in politics?
Katherine said that she was, but thought it rather a degradingprofession now, with paid members making their living out of theirseats. And so they spoke for a little upon this theme, and the Dukefound himself agreeably entertained. He liked her deep voice, and aboveall her extraordinarily good hands.
"Bush?" he said to himself. "I do not remember to have heard the namebefore--the mother perhaps had the breeding. Those hands do not comefrom the shrubbery or the common!"
Now Katherine began to talk of travels. She knew that all people enjoyeddiscussing theirs on their return.
She would much like to visit the East. She had always been thrilled withKinglake's description of Damascus in "Eothen." Was it really a city "ofhidden palaces, of copses and gardens, and fountains and bubblingstreams"? His Grace's eyes expressed real interest now, not so much thatthey should discuss Damascus, but that a modern girl should have readKinglake and deeply enough to quote him correctly! He also knew hisKinglake, and had that potent gift of memory which never stumbles in itsmanifestations.
He continued the subject with enthusiasm and found that this charmingyoung woman was familiar with all the subtlest shades. They had touchedupon passages of peculiar beauty concerning the Dead Sea, and the girlsof Bethlehem and the wonderful desert sun, and were in the middle ofthose dedicated to the Sphinx, when the Duke became aware that a sweetwas being handed and that dinner was more than half over! With infinitediscretion the host had never allowed the flow of conversation to flag,so that no pause among so small a company should bring this promising_tete-a-tete_ to a close. Katherine should have a fair field if he couldprocure it for her.
But His Grace's good manners reproached him for his negligence to thelady he had taken in, and he turned from the contemplation ofKatherine's regular profile with reluctant dutifulness, inwardlydetermining to continue Kinglake and other things when they should allbe safely in the drawing-room. These people would surely play bridge.What a capital thing cards were if one had strength of mind enough toenforce one's own selfishness in not playing them!
Katherine now used her best endeavours to be agreeable to the borehusband, and spoke of subjects which were in his ken. And Gerard,watching her, admired the progress of his pupil. No one of his world, orany world, could have been a more polished or enchanting guest. And hispride in her numbed the pain he had felt all the day.
Then the conversation became general, and gave fresh opportunity forKatherine to show her powers of repartee.
Yes, the quartette played bridge, and began it almost immediately themen joined the ladies upstairs. Mr. Strobridge had carefully not allowedthe talk to stray to any personal subject while they were alone in thedining-room, in case the Duke should question him about Katherine. Ifso, he would have been forced to say who she was, and that would spoilher plans perhaps. How she meant to get out of the dilemma afterwards hedid not speculate. All pretence was so foreign to her nature. But thatwas her affair; his only concern was that this evening should be withoutflaw.
The Duke found a place on the sofa beside Katherine as soon as the restbegan their rubber, and here he could look at her undisturbed andwithout craning his neck.
He admired her extremely. She was the exact type which pleased him,distinguished and well-bred looking. He liked the way she spoke, with nodistressingly modern slang in her phrases. She must evidently have beenmost carefully brought up in a really refined home! Could she be arelation of the d'Estaires? But to ask questions of this sort was nothis method, and he turned the conversation back to "Eothen" again andkindred things.
Katherine was in the seventh heaven; she was blooming like a glowinghot-house plant and seemed to radiate sweetness and serenity. Every nowand then she let her eyes meet his dark-blue ones, with that strangemagnetic look in hers which she knew would compel his interest.
They spoke of music and poetry, and then of pictures--pictures ingeneral--and lastly those of Blissington.
"Did she know Blissington well?"
Yes, she knew it very well, and that enigmatic smile hovered for amoment round her lips. Mordryn was surprised at it.
"It contains some recollections for you which are humorous, then?"
"Yes--very humorous."
"Won't you tell me what they are?" His most attractive clear-cut facecame a little nearer to her in his interest.
"Some day you will know."
"How fraught with meaning! 'Some day I shall know!' Not to-night, then?"
"No, for to-night we are guests at a dinner-party and are talking aboutliterature and music and art."
"But I want to talk about you--May I not?"
"I do not see why you should. I am just a person whom you will neverreally see again--I mean, never really talk to again--so why waste timein unprofitable investigations?"
"How do you know that they would be unprofitable?"
Katherine looked down at her own white hands folded quietly in her lap,then up again and straight into his eyes.
"This night week if you chance to think of this evening, you willrealise how right I am as to their complete unprofitableness!"
"'You are ready for the great adventure?'"]
"You speak in riddles."
She shrugged her shoulders slightly and smiled.
His Grace found himself distinctly curious.
"Why should you be so sure that I shall never really see--or was itspeak to--you again? Do you then live on some desert island off thenorth of Scotland, by chance?"
"In a much more inaccessible place than that." Her eyes sparkled withsome unfathomable expression.
"Iceland?"
"There is an ice barrier surrounding it."
"I shall have to give it up, and you will tell me yourself out ofgra
titude, for ceasing to tease you."
Katherine leaned back on the soft green silk cushions of the sofa. Shewas looking most alluring in her new role of honoured guest. It was sodelightful to be perfectly at ease and able to lean there, and not sitbolt upright in a chair in an attitude of respect. The Duke found thesight of her extremely soothing.
"You come to London sometimes, I expect?"
"Yes, for a part of the year."
"Ah! I thought so! I did not believe that Iceland produced such apolished creature. You know you are quite unusual, Miss Bush. You haveconsented, without apparent reluctance, to talk upon interestingsubjects to a wearied and middle-aged man, and you have not spoken ofgolf or dancing--and you have not smoked!"
"I do smoke sometimes, but only when I am doing some tiresome mechanicalwork like typing."
"Typing?--I suppose it is useful--but what can you have to type? Are youwriting a book?"
Katherine gave a sudden soft laugh, infinitely provoking; it made theblood run in Gerard Strobridge's veins, and he viciously played a knavewhile quivering with a sense of rebellion. He knew what it meant whenshe laughed like that! When would this ghastly evening end?
And Katherine half whispered: "No, not writing one, but trying to learnout of that greatest volume of all time--the book of life!"
"What can you know of life?" The Duke asked the question as GerardStrobridge had asked it long ago. "Protected and pampered and kept fromall but its pleasant sides--what can girls of our class know of life?"
"Tell me, then, what it is--since I could not be supposed to know?" andher mouth still looked mischievous as well as her eyes.
The Duke thrilled a little.
"Life is either a muddle through, or an achievement. And it containsgood things and bad things, and passions--and it is forever trying toexpress itself, and proclaim its meaning quite regardless of laws."
"'Tis not to stalk about and draw fresh air, From time to time, or gaze upon the Sun."
"Oh! it is a splendid thing!" Katherine cried, and her voice vibrated."And unlike the _Spanish Student_, I shall not 'grow weary of thebewildering masquerade,' 'where strangers walk as friends and friends asstrangers.' And even if they did, the unexpectedness of it would bedelightful!"
Mordryn looked at her. At the fresh, young firm, smooth cheeks, theliving red, voluptuous mouth, the ashen-hued hair, every strand of whichseemed to be specially alive and to hold its own silvery glitter. Andthen at her strange, compelling eyes, and he sighed a little. She seemedsuch an embodiment of vital things.
"You are ready for the great adventure?"
"Quite, and I mean to know everything before I grow old andindifferent."
He sighed again.
"Age does not always produce indifference; it would be merciful if itdid."
"There can be no need really to grow old. Age comes because people losetheir grip on things."
"Probably. But responsibilities and sorrows and disappointments age. Youhave no doubt a very sheltered life, and so it seems to you that all iseasy."
Katherine laughed again softly. It was so delicious to think of thereality in contrast to his supposition!
"My life is indeed sheltered--by a very strong shield, but not by theone your words would suggest."
"No? What then?"
"It is not at all interesting to talk of me; I have already toldyou so--Why do you persist? I would much rather hear of foreigncountries--Italy, for instance. I have never been there."
There was not the least subjective deference in her manner to him. Itwas as if an equal were talking to one of her own brain calibre and thatequal a woman, who had a right to be humoured. Women--especiallygirls--were not wont so to treat him, but were always more or lessimpressed by his great position, or his aloofness, or his satirical butcourteous wit. He had sometimes an expression of contemptuous, amiabletolerance, which was eighteenth century and disconcerting. It made allbut the most simple or most highly cultivated among them slightlyuneasy--Was he laughing at them? They were never quite sure.
He found himself piqued now, and in no mood to be balked, so hecontradicted Katherine.
"You may not find yourself interesting to talk about; it chances that Ido. I wish to know what it is that shields you so effectively."
"A clear idea of what I want, I expect, and a strong enough will not tobe much buffeted about by any wind of opinion."
"What a _rara avis_! And you look so young!"
"I am twenty-three; that is fully grown."
"And what is it you want?"
"To be free to soar--to see the world--to feel its throb--to demonstratesome of my ideas."
"On what subjects?"
"The meanings of things--and why they are--and the common sense aspectof them. Then one could help humanity. Lady Garribardine is my ideal ofwhat a woman should be. There is nothing small about her; she is as bigas a great man and far more sagacious."
"There I am with you!" and his voice became eager. "Her Ladyship hasalways been the perfection of things feminine, in my opinion. You knowher well?"
"Extremely well. She is not afraid of her views and principles. She isreally an aristocrat. She believes in herself, so everyone believes inher, too!"
"Most of us are shaky about ourselves."
"You are not--I shall turn the tables now and say I want to talk aboutyou! What does it feel like to be a Duke?--A real Duke, not a _parvenu_or one who makes a laughing stock of his order."
He smiled; she was a most engaging and audacious young person, becauseshe did not speak with childish artlessness, but with deliberation.
"It feels a great responsibility sometimes, and a thing of very littleconsequence at others. It enforces perhaps a standard of behaviour whichit is difficult always to follow. If the circumstances of my life hadbeen different when I was younger, I should have endeavoured not to letour order slip into impotency; now the whole modern political outlookdisgusts me so that I seldom speak in the House."
"That is very wrong of you, and cowardly." She was quite fearless. "Youshould never give up a fight or remain passive when what really belongsto you is being filched from you. If you do, as a band, you deserve tobe put aside. You should fight with the same fierceness with which thoseRadicals do who know they are shams, but are indeed in earnest to obtaintheir own ends."
"You are quite right. There are some women who stimulate in all ways,who are, as it were, sent into the world as electric dynamos. They getthe best out of everyone; they make men work better and play better--andlove better."
He looked at her now with his fine eyes sparkling, but flirtation wasfar beneath his feet. To his mistresses he was a master, a generous,tolerant, contemptuous master; to his friends like Lady Garribardine theessence of courtly consideration; to the general company politely aloof.But to the woman who could arouse his love, what might he not be!Katherine thought this, and a quiver ran through her of a kind she hadnever experienced before, so that her composure was not so perfect asusual when she answered:
"If one really knew exactly what is love!"
"You have no dim guess at it, then?" He was quite surprised that itshould interest him to know what her reply would be.
"Yes, I have--more than that. I know that some phases of it makeone feel mad, agitated, unbalanced, animal, even motherly andprotective--but what it could be if it touched the soul, I cannotfathom."
The Duke did not speak for a moment; he was filled with wonder and agrowing admiration, admiration which extended even beyond the very realappreciation of her beauty. Her mentality was so far above the average,her directness so interesting. There was not the slightest trace of posein anything she said--And that last speech--what possibilities it openedup! She knew something of one side of love then, evidently!
"Do you realise what your words imply?"
"Yes."
"That you have loved someone--in that way--once?"
"Yes, I have--It is a way that frightens one, and makes one more thanever sure that there must be so
mething else. Do you know that thereis--you who have lived your life?"
Her face was pale and cool as moonbeams. She seemed to be talking in theabstract, for all the personal question. The Duke found himself quiteunaccountably moved, and was just about to answer eagerly, when at thatmoment the host joined them from the other drawing-room; the rubber wasover, and he felt he must do his duty and not make too obvious a pointof leaving the pair alone.
"Come and see the miniatures, Mordryn," he said. "We must not forgetthat it was their lure which brought you here to-night."
His tone Katherine well understood, it contained for all its surfacegraciousness some bitterness underneath.
There was general movement after this, and no more private confidencescould be exchanged, so that Miss d'Estaire and Katherine left, with HisGrace's answer to the latter's question still unspoken.
And Gerard Strobridge, as he pressed Katherine's hand in good-nights,whispered:
"Have I done well--and are you satisfied?"
The firm clasp of her cool fingers was his answer.
