by Elinor Glyn
XII
Every one behaved with immense propriety--they said just what theyshould have said, there was no _gene_ at all. And when they went up thestairs together to arrange their hair and their hats for dinner, theelder woman slipped her arm through Theodora's.
"I am going to marry your father, my dear," she said, "and I want you tobe the first to wish me joy."
The dinner went off with great gayety. The widow especially was full ofbright sayings, and Captain Fitzgerald made the most devoted lover. Nottoo elated by his good-fortune, and yet thoroughly happy and tender. Hecontinually told himself that fate had been uncommonly kind to mixbusiness and pleasure so dexterously, for if the widow had not possesseda cent, he still would have been glad to marry her.
He had been quite honest with her on their drive, explaining hisfinancial situation and his disadvantages, which he said could only beslightly balanced by his devotion and affection--but of those he wouldlay the whole at her feet.
And the widow had said:
"Now look here, I am old enough just to know what my money is worth--andif you like to put it as a business speculation for me, I consider, inbuying the companion for the rest of my life who happens to suit me, Iam laying out the sum to my own advantage."
After that there was no more to be said, and he had spent his timemaking love to her like any Romeo of twenty, and both were content.
All through dinner a certain strange excitement dominated Theodora. Shefelt there would be more deep emotion yet to come for her before the dayshould close.
How were they going back to Paris?
The moon had risen pure and full, she could see it through the windows.The night was soft and warm, and when the last sips of coffee andliqueurs were finished it was still only nine o'clock.
On an occasion when no personal excitement was stirring CaptainFitzgerald he probably would have hesitated about approving of Theodoraspending the entire evening alone with Lord Bracondale. She was married,it was true--but to Josiah Brown--and Dominic Fitzgerald knew hisworld. To-night, however, neither the widow nor he had outside thoughtsbeyond themselves. Indeed, Mrs. McBride was so overflowing with joy shehad almost a feeling of satisfaction in the knowledge that the otherswould possibly be happy too--when she thought of them at all!
Again she decided the situation for every one, and again fate laughed.
There was no use staying any longer at Versailles, because the parkgates were shut and they could not stroll in the moonlight, but a driveback and a few turns in the Bois with a little supper at Madrid would bea fitting ending to the day.
"You must meet us at Madrid at half-past ten," she said; "andDominic"--the name came out as if from long habit--"telephone for atable in the bosquet--Numero 3--I like that garcon best, he knows mywants."
And so they got into their separate automobiles.
"Let us have all the windows down," said Theodora, "to get all thebeautiful air--it is such a lovely night."
Her heart was beating as it had never beat before. How could she controlherself! How keep calm and ordinary during the enchanting drive! Herhands were cold as ice, while flaming roses burned in the white velvetcheeks.
And Hector saw it all and understood, and passion surged madly in hisveins. For a mile or two there was silence--only the moonlight and theswift rushing through the air, and the wild beating of their hearts. Andso they came to the long, dark stretch of wood by St. Cloud. And thedevil whispered sophistries and fate continued to laugh. Then passionwas too strong for him.
"Darling," he said, and his fine resolutions fled to the winds, whilehis deep voice was hoarse and broken. "My darling!--God! I love youso--beyond all words or sense--Oh, let us be happy for this onenight--we must part afterwards I know, and I will accept that--but justfor to-night there can be no sin and no harm in being a littlehappy--when we are going to pay for it with all the rest of our lives.Let us have the memory of one hour of bliss--the angels themselves couldnot grudge us that."
One hour of bliss out of a lifetime! Would it be a terrible sin,Theodora wondered, a terrible, unforgivable sin to let him kiss her--tolet him hold her just once in his arms.
There was no light in the coupe--he had seen to that--only the greatlamps flaring in the road and the moonlight.
She clasped her hands in an agony of emotion. She was but a dove in thenet of an experienced fowler, but she did not know or think of that, norhe either. They only knew they loved each other passionately, and thissituation was more than they could bear.
"Oh, I trust you!" she said. "If you tell me it is not a terrible sin Iwill believe you--I do not know--I cannot think--I--"
But she could speak no more because she was in his arms.
The intense, unutterable joy--the maddening, intoxicating bliss of thenext hour! To have her there, unresisting--to caress her lips and eyesand hair--to murmur love words--to call her his very own! Nothing inheaven could equal this, and no hell was a price too great to pay--so itseemed to him. It was the supremest moment of his life; and how muchmore of hers who knew none other, who had never received the kisses ofmen or thrilled to any touch but his!
After a little she drew herself away and shivered. She knew she waswicked now--very, very wicked--but it was again characteristic of herthat having made her decision there was no vacillation about her. Thedie was cast--for that night they were to be happy, and all the rest ofher life should be penitence and atonement.
But to-night there was no room for anything but joy. She had neverdreamed in her most secret thoughts of moments so gloriously sweet asthese--to have a lover--and such a lover! And it was true--it must betrue--that they had lived before, and all this passion was not thegrowth of one short week.
It seemed as if it was all her life, all her being--it could meannothing now but Hector--Hector--Hector! And over and over again he madeher whisper in his ear that she loved him--nor could she ever tire ofhearing him say he worshipped her.
Oh, they were foolish and tender and wonderful, as lovers always are.
He had given his orders beforehand and the chauffeur was a man ofintelligence. They drove in the most beautiful _allee_ when they came tothe Bois--and no incident ruffled the exquisite peace and bliss of theirtime.
Suddenly Hector became aware of the fact it was just upon half-past ten,and they were almost in sight of Madrid, which would end it all.
And a pang of hideous pain shot through him, and he did not speak.
In the distance the lights blazed into the night, and the sight of themfroze Theodora to ice.
It was finished then--their hour of joy.
"My darling," he exclaimed, passionately, "good-bye, and remember all mylife is in your hands, and I will spend it in worship of you andthankfulness for this hour of yourself you have given to me. I am yoursto do with as you will until death do us part."
"And I," said Theodora, "will never love another man--and if we havesinned we have sinned together--and now, oh, Hector, we must face ourfates."
Her voice tore his very heartstrings in its unutterable pathos.
And in that last passionate kiss it seemed as if they exchanged theirvery souls.
Then they drove into the glare of the restaurant lights, having tastedof the knowledge of good and evil.
