by Joyce Meyer
Jesus said no one knows the day and hour of His return, not the angels or even the Son of God, but only the Father Himself (see Mark 13:32). The day will come, and for some it may come much quicker than they think. We all plan to live a long life and die at an old age, but that doesn’t always happen, and when our time is up here on Earth, there is nothing we can do to change it. Jesus strongly exhorts us to be on guard and constantly alert. I want to quote five verses out of Mark 13 because I am amazed at how frequently Jesus spoke the same words over and over. They must be very important or He would not have done that.
“Be on guard and stay constantly alert [and pray]; for you do not know when the appointed time will come. It is like a man away on a journey, who when he left home put his servants in charge, each with his particular task, and also ordered the doorkeeper to be continually alert. Therefore, be continually on the alert—for you do not know when the master of the house is coming, whether in the evening, or at midnight, or when the rooster crows, or in the morning—[stay alert,] in case he should come suddenly and unexpectedly and find you asleep and unprepared. What I say to you I say to everyone, ‘Be on the alert [stay awake and be continually cautious]!’”
Mark 13:33–37
Satan definitely wants us to be unprepared when Jesus returns for us, and he does everything he can to distract us from pursuing a relationship with the Lord—from prayer, from Bible study, from obediently serving God by helping others, and from many other things that strengthen our walk with God. Therefore, it is urgent that we learn his character, understand how he operates, and take our responsibility so God can effectively fight our battles with and for us.
What Should We Watch For?
First and foremost, we should watch for thoughts that are not in agreement with God’s Word, because all the words we speak and the actions we take come from our thoughts. I’ll repeat what I often say: “Where the mind goes, the man follows.”
If we are watchful concerning our thoughts, we can cast down wrong ones and purposely choose right ones. By doing so we can completely avoid many miserable days the devil has planned for us.
Be watchful against temptation because Satan is the tempter of all wrongdoing. God tempts us to do good things, and those are the temptations we should not resist. Remembering that we overcome evil with good is very important (see Rom. 12:21). If we stay busy doing good, there will not be room for the evil that persistently tries to draw us away from God.
Another thing to watch for is “self,” or selfishness, or self-centeredness! In the final analysis, people’s greatest battles are with themselves, and I will address this in the next chapter.
CHAPTER 13
“Self”
Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.
Philippians 2:4 ESV
Self, in the context in which I want to use it, represents selfishness or being self-centered. The devil tempts and provokes us to want to sin, but self makes the final choice and is therefore responsible when we do sin. When people are being selfish, they oppose God’s will by exercising their own will and doing as they please. What they want is more important to them than what God wants. This is what caused the fall of Satan as well as the fall of Adam and Eve (see Isa. 14:12–14; Gen. 3:1–7). God created Satan perfectly, with unusual beauty and faculties. He had amazing abilities and great power. But he fell because of pride, which is nothing more than a manifestation of self. He wasn’t satisfied with the amazing gifts and abilities God had bestowed on him; he wanted to be equal to—or above—God. He said that he would lift his throne “above the stars of God” and “ascend above the heights of the clouds” so he could be “like the Most High” (see Isa. 14:13–14). Evil exists in this self, which is found in angelic beings as well as in people.
We know from Scripture that when God cast Satan out of heaven, the angels, who also rebelled against God, were thrown down with him (see Rev. 12:7–9). They were not forced to rebel; they rebelled deliberately. God wants us to love and obey Him because we choose to, not because we have no other choice and are merely programmed to do so. Thus, He gives us free will, which presents us continually with the need to choose between good and evil. Satan tempts us to do evil, and God urges us to do good things.
The choice is always ours. Free will—the right to choose—is a wonderful freedom and a tremendous responsibility. Because we have freedom of choice, we must also take responsibility for the outcomes of our choices. Every choice comes with a consequence, and for that reason God continually urges us in His Word to choose His will so we may end up with a life we will enjoy (see Deut. 30:19).
Satan, in his plan of attack, constantly plays on the tendency to be selfish, which is in all of us. Throughout the Bible we can easily spot the people who made selfish choices and read about their outcomes. We can also spot the ones who obediently followed God out of love for Him and see what their outcomes were. I often feel that the Bible is a simple message presented over and over in a variety of ways. Its message is that the righteous will flourish and the wicked will meet with ultimate destruction.
I believe God wants us to use our free will to choose His will. When we do, life gets really good. It is not without challenge, but we do continually see the favor of God in our lives, and we ultimately experience deliverance from our trials and difficulties. God will not force us to do the right thing, but He urges us to do so for our own good.
The Disciples
We are surprised at the disciples’ selfish behavior as we read about their arguments about which of them was the greatest (see Luke 22:24). To be chosen as one of the twelve disciples was a tremendous privilege, but it seems that no matter what God gives us, we still find a way to think we should have something else. Truly, our greatest battle is with our self. Self is filled with greed. It can be defeated, but only by relying on God, being willing to obey Him, and aggressively giving of ourselves to others and truly desiring their good. To be selfish is natural, but to be unselfish requires effort. The Holy Spirit gives us the strength to do the right thing if that is what we choose.
We may be surprised and disappointed by the disciples’ behavior while not recognizing the selfishness in ourselves. Selfishness (self) is an inbred weakness in our flesh due to the fall of man. It will never completely disappear as long as we are on this earth, but we do not have to let it rule us. God has given us many tools with which to fight the enemy of self. First, we can call on His strength at any time and fully expect to receive it. Second, God has given us a spirit of discipline (see 2 Tim. 1:7). And third, we have self-control as a fruit of the Holy Spirit, Who dwells in us (see Gal. 5:22–23). We also should realize that Satan tempts us to be selfish, and when he does, we should resist him.
We are wise to remain aware of how strongly self seeks to rule us. It is stirred up by the devil, and unless we recognize the problem and resist it through the power of God, it will rule over us. I have found the best way to resist being selfish and greedy is to be an aggressive giver in all areas of life. Is it easy? No! Do I fail often? Yes! But thankfully, when we fall God helps us get back up again and resume doing the right thing. When people are determined to do so, they will gain victory over the devil.
It amazes me how selfish I still can be even after forty-three years of studying God’s Word, ministering to others, and desiring to live for God. Saying that we want God’s will in our lives is easy, but making the quality decision to follow through with right action is more difficult. I can assure you that even while I write this chapter on self, I have been convicted of previously unseen areas of selfishness in myself that I want to confront and intend to do so with God’s help.
Asking God to reveal any areas of selfishness in us is a wise course of action. The bottom line is simply that we want what we want and are not naturally inclined to sacrifice our desires for another person’s happiness. Doing so requires supernatural help, the help of God. It also requires being willing to suffer in the flesh i
n order to do God’s will. When our flesh doesn’t get what it wants, it whines and pouts; it may even get depressed and waste a lot of time wallowing in self-pity. But thankfully, we can resist all of those bad habits through the power of God.
Selfish People Are Unhappy People
I have discovered through personal experience that being selfish and happy at the same time is impossible. God has not created us to live only for ourselves, and when we try to live for self, we miss out on the joy Jesus came to give us.
One of my favorite Scriptures is 2 Corinthians 5:15. It declares that Jesus “died for all, so that all those who live might live no longer to and for themselves, but to and for Him Who died and was raised again for their sake” (AMPC). Yes, Jesus died for our sins. He paid the debt we owed and took the punishment we deserved. He also came to set us free from bondage. The greatest bondage people can endure is to be so selfish that their entire world is filled with themselves, what they want, and what they need. I often say that the greatest thing God has set me free from is “me.”
Learning to love others and care about their happiness is the only way to be happy. Why? God has established a law in the earth called sowing and reaping. People will reap whatever they sow—and only what they sow (see Gal. 6:7). If people sow happiness into the lives of others, they will reap happiness for themselves. If we do what benefits and makes another person happy, benefit and happiness will come back to us. However, if we are greedy and self-centered toward others, then we will find only misery. Selfish people are lonely because they are the only ones in their tiny little world.
When Paul wrote, “I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me” (Gal. 2:20 NKJV), I believe he was saying he was no longer living merely for himself and his own interests, but for what Christ desired of him. I want to mention that Paul penned this Scripture twenty years after his conversion on the Damascus road. I am a bit comforted to know that it took Paul a while to mature spiritually to the point where he could write these words. I believe the same principle is true for most of us. We are so bent on making ourselves happy and getting what we want that it takes time for us to fully realize the only way to get what we desire is to give ourselves to Jesus completely and let Him use us for the benefit of other people.
I don’t mean to imply that we don’t take care of ourselves or do anything for ourselves, but simply that we should not be filled with self while caring nothing for the needs and desires of others. The principle of sowing and reaping is exciting to me because it means I can give away what I would like to have and be assured that in due time I will reap a harvest according to what I have sown.
If you are unhappy and lack joy, I strongly encourage you to do more for other people, and if you do, I believe you will experience a harvest of joy in your own life.
Self = Pride
The devil loves nothing more than to destroy our witness for Christ by tempting us to be selfish, self-centered, and filled with pride. He tries to make us think more highly of ourselves than we should and to be proud of what we do well without thanking God for enabling us to do it. Pride causes critical judgment toward those who can’t do what we can do. That makes us feel superior to them and usually grows into a disdain and disrespect for those we view as not as good as we are. It may also cause us to mistreat them. The way we treat other people is very important to God, and it possibly says more about our character than anything else.
If you are exceptionally intelligent, learn easily, and retain information, or if you are a gifted public speaker or an amazingly talented singer, you did not give yourself those abilities. God gave them to you, and they are to be used to glorify Him, not so you can be puffed up with pride.
For who regards you as superior or what sets you apart as special? What do you have that you did not receive [from another]? And if in fact you received it [from God or someone else], why do you boast as if you had not received it [but had gained it by yourself]?
1 Corinthians 4:7
Any ability we have comes from God, so why do we boast? Simply because the self that is in us wants to feel good; it wants to be above others, the best, the greatest of all. The only way to accomplish that is to find someone who isn’t as good as we are at something and use it as an opportunity to feel superior. Those we belittle in our thoughts and attitudes have abilities we do not have, and we should applaud what they can do rather than compare ourselves to them.
If you have a good singing voice, do you often find yourself singing a little louder than others in church so you will be heard and admired? If you have knowledge in many things, do you find yourself continually offering advice that people do not ask for? In The Christian Warfare, D. Martyn Lloyd-Jones tells about several men who testified about the sins from which God had delivered them, and the discussion degenerated into a contest about who was the worst sinner! I think that might be the most ridiculous display of pride I have heard. They were actually boasting about their sin.
I have noticed when trying to fellowship with groups of ministers that the conversation often becomes a boasting session about who is doing the most in ministry, how big their ministries are, how many followers they have on their social media accounts, and so on. I have caught myself all too often taking part in the competition and have had to ask God to forgive me for the sin of pride.
Pride prevents us from being thankful because we think we deserve what we have and more. Pride causes people to talk excessively, often about themselves. James writes that we should be slow to speak and quick to hear (see James 1:19).
Pride also causes us to judge others harshly for their sin while thinking, I would never do that. But the Bible says we are to be careful when we think we stand firm, “immune to temptation, being overconfident and self-righteous,” because we might fall (see 1 Cor. 10:12). How often do we end up doing the same thing for which we have judged someone else? Too often, I think! We always need to remember that the sin of pride is what caused Satan’s fall, and we don’t want to follow his example.
The Lord Is Coming Soon
Let all men know and perceive and recognize your unselfishness (your considerateness, your forbearing spirit). The Lord is near [He is coming soon].
Philippians 4:5 AMPC
The Lord will return sooner than most of us may think, and each of us will be required to give an account of our time on earth (see Rom. 14:12). When that time comes, it will be too late to go back and do the things we should have done. Although we don’t earn salvation by our works, but only by faith in what Jesus did for us through His death and resurrection, our works are important because they demonstrate our faith and represent our relationship with God.
We are living in a time of great confusion. The devil is actively working through wicked people to try and remove God from everything in our society. As believers in Christ, we must take a strong stand for what is right and let people see Jesus through us. The only way we can do that is to forget about ourselves and let God use us for His glory. We need not worry that if we do so we will live miserable lives and never have anything we desire, because the exact opposite will happen. If we give up focusing on ourselves and trying to please ourselves all the time, and instead ask God to use us to help other people, His blessings will overwhelm us.
All disobedience is directly linked to selfishness. Adam and Eve saw something they wanted in the garden, and even though God prohibited it, they decided to please themselves instead of God (see Gen. 2:16–17; 3:6). The devil tempted Eve to disobey God, but he did not tell her what the consequences of her disobedience would be (see Gen. 3:1–5). He never does, and sadly, we often find out too late that in trying to get everything for ourselves, we have lost what was most important.
How many husbands have spent so much time working to make more money or to climb the ladder of success to build their ego that they have ended up losing their families? Far too many! When you are on your deathbed you will not ask to see your bank balance. You will want to
be with family and those who love you.
The Bible tells many stories about people whose selfishness led them into trouble:
• Cain killed Abel because of selfishness (see Gen. 4:8–9; 1 John 3:12).
• Joseph’s brothers sold him into slavery and lied to their father because of their selfishness and jealousy (see Gen. 37:18–33; Acts 7:9–10).
• King David committed adultery and murder because of selfishness (see 2 Sam. 11:2–17).
We cannot find a sin that was or is not committed because of self. We all have to deal with it, but we do not have to let it win the battle. If we are willing to die to self, as God’s Word instructs us, we can be freed from its tyranny.
“I assure you and most solemnly say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains alone [just one grain, never more]. But if it dies, it produces much grain and yields a harvest.”
John 12:24
Jesus laid aside His self and died for us. Because of that, a great harvest of souls has been saved who will spend eternity in Heaven. The same principle works in our lives. If we are willing to die to self, God can use us to work in His Kingdom and lead others to a saving knowledge of Christ through our words and behavior.
The apostle Paul, inspired by the Holy Spirit, writes that we should consider ourselves to be dead to sin, but alive to God. He urges us not to let sin reign in our mortal bodies or obey its lusts and passions. He tells us not to continue offering our bodies to sin as instruments of wickedness, but by a decisive act, to offer them to God as instruments of righteousness. Once we have done that, and as we continue doing it, sin will no longer be a master over us (see Rom. 6:11–14).
Thoughts and Emotions
Our thoughts and emotions are filled with self, and if we intend to live for God, we cannot allow either of them to rule over us. We will always contend with them, but we can learn to live beyond them. I may feel like being angry with someone who has treated me unjustly, but I can choose to forgive that person as God instructs me to do.
