by Jamie Knight
Or maybe it is now?
I’m awake as fuck, and I’m hard as fuck.
I push my boxers a little down my legs, letting my cock spring out. I guess I’m about to do this. Jenny is very different from my usual type, but this is the hardest I’ve ever been. It’s probably why I was dumb enough to think she’d be down for a friends-with-benefits thing.
I was thinking with my dick.
I grip on to my shaft, thinking about Jenny’s soft, full lips. I wanted to run my hands all over her entire body, but I was worried about scaring her off. I’ve already caught a glimpse of her beautiful body, but the thought of it underneath me is enough to get some precum dripping out from my tip.
I move my hand up and down my shaft, pumping myself while thinking about all the dirty things I want to do to the girl in the room next door. Oh fuck, just thinking about her orgasming has me close to the edge. The thought of her tight, wet pussy riding me…
Jesus!
Cum shoots out of my tip. My muscles tense as I quiet my grunts, so I don’t alarm Jenny. I’ve already caused enough trouble tonight.
Just fuck! At this point, I’m well aware that I am fixated on my fake fiancée. And we’re not even God damn engaged! AND it’s only been one night! How am I going to survive six weeks, knowing, every time I come home, she’ll be waiting? She might ignore me given that dumbass stunt I just pulled, though.
That might be for the better. If Jenny chooses to ignore me, I can use that hatred to temper all my desire.
I get up, pulling my draws back on, and go to the bathroom in my room. I wash my hands and then get back into bed, this time getting cuddly under the covers. I really need to get some sleep. I have practice tomorrow, and I need to be in tiptop shape. I’m not about to let my home situation get me off track from being the best player I can be.
Lying on my back, I look up at my ceiling and contemplate my next moves. Maybe I can buy her some kind of fancy chocolate. The hot chocolate showed me that she has a sweet tooth beyond compare. This small gift might not fully patch up this little tear, but it can be the start to repairing what I broke. I’ve learned that a small step forward is still progress.
I’ll need to be a patient man.
I just hope this rash choice I made doesn’t end up blowing up royally in my face. I’ve already had one giant misstep in recent months. I survived that one, but barely. I don’t know what I’d do after a second one. There is only so much shit people will tolerate from one person. Honestly, I’m reaching the end of the rope with my own damn self. I just hope I don’t reach my limit with Jenny. I’ll do my best to keep my idiocy to a minimum. If not for me, for her.
I don’t want to make her spend her final six weeks of college with a total dumbass.
Chapter Eleven
Jenny
Last night was a total mess. I mean, it was probably just a normal day for Jameson. He says he’s trying to change, but that doesn’t change the fact that his past is littered with risqué days and nights.
Selena was lovely. She always has been. Even though we only spent a year going to the same school, it was hard not to notice just how much light Jameson’s older sister exuded. I wanted to talk to her back then, but I was too shy. Both of the Kendricks have always intimidated the hell out of me. Their family is just way too cool.
I agreed to this lunch, and it would be weird if I cancelled. But, oh boy, am I feeling nervous about it. My mind is already racing with all the ways I could fuck up today — like giving away the fact the Jameson and I aren’t really engaged to be married. I am sure I am going to say something dumb.
That’s why I made the hot chocolate last night. It was supposed to be a way to calm my nerves. The thick gooey stuff never fails to make me feel better. But then my ‘fiancé’ had to walk in and get all up in my head and then kiss me! How could he kiss me?!
I’m going to lose my God damn mind!
I just need to not think about it anymore. If it’s out of my mind, then it can’t bother me. Plus, it’s about five more minutes before I have to leave this apartment and face Selena.
“Pull it together, Jenny! You can do this! Really, you can!” I’ve been in the bathroom way too long. It started with getting ready, and then, all of a sudden, I was looking at my lips, wondering if traces of Jameson were still there.
Not that that matters!
I wash my hands one more time and then leave the bathroom. My purse is on the sofa, and I rummage through it to make sure I have everything I need before leaving. Rushing to the door, I’m already fucking up this lunch date by being late. Shouldn’t have spent so much time looking at myself in the mirror, worrying about how dumb I am.
I leave the apartment. My back is turned while I lock the door, when there is a finger poking into the top of my shoulder. I almost jump out of my bones.
“Jesus Christ!”
I turn around to see Selena standing behind me. Her eyes are wide like she’s just as startled as me before she bursts into a fit of giggles.
“Oh my God, Jenny! I didn’t mean to scare you.” She does seem really apologetic. That doesn’t help my heart rate go down any faster. That’s just going to take some time.
“Don’t worry about it,” I wave her concern away. She didn’t mean to frighten the living bejesus out of me, it just happened.
“Okay, I’ll be more careful next time.”
Oh, shit. I hadn’t even thought about the fact that we’re probably going to be hanging out a lot. This charade is starting to feel very real.
I follow Selena downstairs to her car. She’s talking about something, but I’m not sure what. I’m too in my head, and, plus, my heart is still beating a little too fast for my liking. I think in another minute I should be fine.
I’m not usually that easy to scare. I must be doubly on my toes given how I’m lying 24 / 7 at the moment.
“We can take my car, I think it’ll be easier. I can drop you back at the apartment before you need to get to class. Is that okay?”
“Mmhm,” I nod. I’d honestly say yes to anything right now. If Selena asked me to pretend to be her fiancée or actually be her fiancée, I’d probably say yes! I’m just so muddle headed.
I need to get out of this fog brain I’m in. Selena is one hundred percent going to pick up on the fact that I’m totally out of it.
“Where are we going?”
“I was thinking we could go to this fun little café. They have some more substantial foods, but if you also want to keep it light, they have options for that as well.”
“Sounds good.”
Selena starts driving. She’s still talking, and I’m nodding and giving the occasional sound of affirmation. I really have no idea what she’s saying. Which is fine. I think this casual car ride is a fine time to zone out since she’s focused on the road. But, once we get to lunch, I’m going to check back in.
“We’re here!”
We’re parked in front of a cute café that has seating both outside and inside. It really does have a casual vibe going for it and I hope it can help me relax. Selena picked a great place to have a conversation. Maybe the environment with help me keep my head.
We go inside and find a couple of seats. Someone comes to take our order immediately.
“I’m going to have the grilled chicken sandwich, and could you put the spicy mustard on it instead of mayonnaise?”
“Of course!” The waitress turns to me.
I’m not sure what I want. My nerves are getting the best of me, and I’m not sure if I could hold down any amount of food. But I don’t want to be weird and not order anything. So I just blurt out, “I’ll have the grilled chicken bowl with white rice and broccoli.”
“Great choice!” She takes our menus and leaves, so, now, Selena and I are alone. I know she’s going to ask me a bunch of questions. What if she asks me something I don’t know? Jameson and I barely know one another. I mean, yeah, I was a little obsessed with him in high school, but there’s still a lot I don’t kn
ow. I’m sure Selena is going to pick up on my ignorance. There’s no way she doesn’t.
“Uh, Jenn! I want to know everything about you! You are my brother’s fiancée, and I’m still a little salty that he didn’t tell any of us, but that’s more directed at him. So, disregard, and tell me who you are.”
“Ummm…,” I don’t know what she wants me to say. Seems like I don’t know a lot of things lately. “My last name is Foster?”
Selena giggles, her smile radiant. She’s really pretty. Her and her brother have the same good looks, like different sides of the same gorgeous coin.
“Thank you very much for that information, but it’s not what I meant. I want to know more about who you are. Like Jenny Foster,” she leans a little closer when saying my last name, “what are you majoring in? Jameson told me you were in your last year of college.”
“Oh, I’m studying sports medicine.”
Selena’s eyes go wide. “Really? That’s amazing! Did you help Jameson with his shoulder problem?”
I hadn’t even thought that could be a question. I guess it would make sense, if your fiancée is a sports medicine major, and you play sports, she would help you out with your injuries.
“Um, well, I did what I could. I’m still only in school, though. It’s not like I’m practicing yet.”
“I’m sure you did fine!” She leans in a little closer. “I do have a bit of a follow-up question.”
“What is it?”
“Has Jamie figured out a way to get over his little mental block?”
I have no idea what she’s talking about. I’m sure it has to do with sports given the context of our conversation, but, even with that deduction, I don’t have the actual answer. Jameson’s never talked about any kind of mental block. I guess the best option would be to shrug.
So, I shrug.
“I’m guessing he doesn’t like talking about it, huh?” Selena sighs, leaning back in her chair. “He’s a total brick wall which I’m sure you know about?” I nod. “I mean, his PT said that everything is all healed up in his shoulder. And he’s in therapy, so I can’t figure out what’s holding him back. I’ve tried asking him about it, but he refuses to give in an inch. I’d hoped he would have confided in you, maybe.”
She seems very disappointed, and I wish I could help, but I’m a lot more in the dark than she is.
“Yeah,” is all I say. She accepts my lack of info, and, thankfully, our food arrives. The waitress puts our plates down in front of us, and I get a little bit of a break as we start eating. It helps me gather my thoughts, not that that’s there’s much to gather. All that’s going through my head is how much I know absolutely nothing, and the fact that Jameson kissed me last night.
He fucking KISSED me!
“Jenny?”
“Huh?”
“Are you okay, you zoned out there for a little bit.”
“Yeah, I’m fine.”
“Oh, cool. I was just asking if you and Jamie talked about where you guys wanted to get married?”
“No, not really…” Which is the truth. We haven’t talked about it mainly because it’s not going to happen.
“What about a date. I’m guessing you don’t have an exact date since there’s no venue, but what about kind of a general time frame? Probably after you graduate?”
“Probably,” I swallow.
“That would make the most sense. I mean, you have like what, a few weeks left? Duh, it’ll be after graduation. Sorry. Anyway, I hope you guys know I would love to help you out with planning everything and anything. Would a fall wedding be something you’d like? Summer is nice, but hella hot, you know. Unless you go for something indoors. Are you hoping for an indoor or an outdoor ceremony?”
“Um…”
“I know these are a lot of questions, but just take your time answering. It’s not like we need to get this all planned right away. We definitely have time.”
I can’t take it anymore.
“Selena there’s something I need to tell you.”
“What is it?”
I take a deep breath, wondering if I’m doing the right thing. But, honestly, that doesn’t even matter because I am going to burst at the seams if I have to keep this secret from Selena one second longer. I do not have the capacity to come up with lies at the rate she asks questions.
“Jameson and I aren’t really engaged.”
She tilts her head. “What do you mean?” She is so confused.
“I woke up in the Leviathan’s locker room after being drugged, and Jameson found me. When his teammates came in, he made up the lie that we were engaged because he was worried they’d all think he was back to being a dick. I went along with it because he offered to let me stay with him, and I really needed a new place because my roommate was terrorizing me. This engagement is just a convenient thing for the both of us, and, we’re going to call it off eventually.”
The level of calm I feel after spilling my guts is amazing. I let out a long breath, and my muscles relax.
But then I remember that I just revealed everything to Selena. Oh my god, what is she going to say. Is she going to yell?
I look at Selena, and I cannot read her face. Her eyes are slightly narrowed, and she’s bobbing her head back and forth. Her pupils go back and forth. What is she thinking about? Is she upset? Will she blow our cover? What is Jameson going to say? Is he going to kick me out?
Will I have to go back and live with Carrie?
“So,” Selena starts. I focus back on her, anxious to hear what she’s thinking. “So, my brother thought it would be easier to pretend you’re his fiancée as opposed to…?”
I’m waiting for her to finish, but then realize that is the end of her question.
“Oh! He just thought the story was too farfetched for anyone to believe. Plus, given his history, his team probably would have thought he was lying anyway.”
Selena nods her head like she agrees.
“I wouldn’t be surprised if they all still thought he was full of shit. I don’t think a single person on his team actually likes him, not that I can totally blame them. My brother didn’t really give them his best side.”
“Yeah, he said something like that.”
“Well, if my brother had to be fake engaged to anyone, I’m glad that it’s you. I really like you, Jenny.”
I’m sure Selena is just saying that to be nice. It was barely a real choice for Jameson, more a set of very unusual circumstances.
I roll my eyes. “Thanks, but Jameson must be crazy. I mean, who is really going to believe a guy like him would go for a girl like me?”
Selena purses her lips and sits back a bit in her chair. “Do you really feel that way?”
I shrug, not sure on how to respond. It’s not like this isn’t a thought I’ve had multiple times. Back in high school, when I thought Jameson was interested, but then he ghosted me on what would have been our date — It kind of confirmed how I felt about myself. He didn’t see me as attractive, plain and simple. The only reason why we’re even at this point, right now, is because I’m the girl who was passed out in his locker room and the girl who is staying at his house.
“Do you have any plans this afternoon?”
“I have class?”
She presses a finger to her lips. “Hmm, I’m not going to tell you to skip them, because that would be too aggressive of me, but I have this plan, and I’d love for you to spend the rest of the day with me.”
She’s making it sound all vague and intriguing. It’s not like I’m a constant class skipper. In fact, I always go to class. It’s near the end of my senior year. I can afford to live a little.
“Okay, yeah, I can skip class to spend the afternoon with you.”
“Oh my goodness, perfect!” Selena looks down at her meal and scrunches her nose. “You know what? I’m not even that hungry anymore. If you’re done, we can skedaddle.”
I barely touched my food, but that’s because I did not come to this lunch very hungry. So, I�
�m ready to go.
“We can leave.”
“Amazing!” Selena takes out her wallet and puts some cash down on the table. She’s out of her seat before I can process that we are leaving. I grab all my stuff and follow her outside. I catch up to her right outside of the car. “Sorry if I’m moving too fast. I’m just excited to show you what I’m thinking!”
Chapter Twelve
Jenny
The car doors unlock, and the two of us get inside. I’m starting to get more excited about spending this time with Selena. Now that everything is out in the open, there’s really no reason to be nervous. Maybe she and I can be friends.
“Oh!” I say. I take out my wallet because I just realized she paid for our whole meal. I should at least pay for my half. “Let me pay you back for lunch.”
“Oh, girl, don’t worry about it,” she says. She starts the car, and that seems to be it.
I’m not one to argue a whole bunch, so I put my wallet away and look out the window while Selena takes us to our next destination.
“Okay, so the reason why I’m whisking you away on this mystery adventure is because I don’t like how you said Jameson would be crazy to be with a girl like you. I think you said something similar last night. Jenny, you are gorgeous, but I’m sure you won’t believe me if I just tell you, so, I was thinking, we could do a spa day!”
A spa day? That sounds absolutely wild. I’ve never even gone to a spa. I don’t know what that entails.
“I can see you’re not saying anything because you are worried. Let me tell you, I’m not going to throw you to the wolves. I was thinking we could get you a beauty treatment, maybe go to a makeup tutorial. That way, you can take these skills and use them yourself. I’m probably going to get a massage because my muscles have been feeling a little tight lately. But, really, you can do whatever. This place is amazing. I go all the time.”
