Jason laughed. “A lot of good that did.”
“We didn’t take it too far.” Even as he said it, he knew better. They definitely took it too far.
“We didn’t take it far enough if you ask me. We could have talked her down, man.”
Not when Bree got that flash of panic-fueled anger in her eyes. When she got like that, she came undone. If they hadn’t left, it would have only gotten worse. “I don’t think so.”
Jason shrugged. “It would have been epic, bro.”
“We can’t do this, not with her.”
“Can’t do what? Share her?”
“Among other things,” he growled.
“Why her?” When Jeremy didn’t answer, Jason pushed the issue. “Why is Bree different?”
“She just is.” He refused to give him more of an answer. She was the one that got away. The reason why all those goddamn songs made sense. His brother didn’t need to know the details. To make his point, he repeated, “She just…is.”
“We share, bro. It’s what we do. It’s what we’ve done for years.”
“You don’t share Bailey with me,” he pointed out. It wasn’t that he didn’t want Jason there with him. He just didn’t want Jason with Bree.
“Dude, I told you why.”
“And I told you I’d never run off with your girlfriend,” he countered in a growl. Why was he fighting this? He had absolutely no interest in a three-way with Bailey McKoy. Not only was she too snarky for his taste, she was also Jason’s girl whether he wanted to admit it or not. “We share when neither of us want to get attached.”
As soon as he said it, he ground out a curse. Jason blinked as comprehension settled in his expression. “That’s it, isn’t it? You really are in love with Bree. I thought it was a major crush at the most. But this? This takes it to a whole new level. I can’t believe I never put it together until now.”
Shit. Shit! He didn’t need his brother putting anything together, the perceptive son of a bitch. Lying to him would only cause him to push harder, so Jeremy redirected. “Do you love Bailey?”
“Yes.” He didn’t even hesitate. When Jeremy could only stare at him in stunned silence, Jason shrugged. “What? You asked. I answered.”
“Then why aren’t you with her? Why all the fooling around? If you say it’s complicated, I will end you.”
“What do you want me to say? I love her. I also love my Seahawks PJ bottoms. That doesn’t mean those are the only ones I’ll ever wear. Dude, I’m only twenty-eight. I’m not ready to settle on a single pair of PJs.”
Regardless how bizarre the analogy, it made sense, at least coming from his brother. Jeremy changed lanes to get out from behind a semi spraying oil and water on the windshield. “Moving on.”
“Moving back to you,” Jason corrected. “You being in love with Bree puts everything into perspective. That’s why you’ve never had a serious thing with any other woman. It’s why I always end up taking them home or having breakfast with them, forcing me to talk to them.”
“I have breakfast.”
“You make breakfast,” he corrected. “That’s not the same thing. While you’re busy cooking to avoid her, I’m making small talk until we’ve convinced each other it wasn’t just a one-night stand.”
“They’re not all one-night stands.” The rest, he couldn’t deny. At least, not entirely. There were other reasons, but he refused to go into them and add more to Jason’s overinflated ego.
“Okay, two-night stands. You know what? Maybe we should give this one to another team. You’ve got zero objectivity when it comes to her. Now I know why.”
“Fuck objectivity.” When his brother shot him a sideways look, Jeremy drew in several breaths to calm down. “I’m fine.”
“Yeah.” Jason shook his head. “It shows.”
With a sigh, he went on. “I switched out the driver after we left the hotel.”
“What happened to Lou?”
“He won box seats to tonight’s Mariners game and needed to be there first thing this morning for the photo op.”
Jason blinked as he dropped his jaw. “Dude, you did not give him my seats.”
“Rand is driving her back,” he explained, ignoring the lethal glare he’d earned from his brother for using a set of tickets that clearly cost him something important. “What? They’re just seats. I’ll pay you back.”
“I’m going to kill you.” He set his jaw and cooled his expression. As threatening as he attempted to look, the fear in his eyes gave him away. What the hell was he afraid of? They were just tickets.
“There’ll be other games.”
“You don’t get it. Do you realize what I had to agree to in order to get those seats?” he exclaimed, alarm lacing his voice. Alarm and something else. Rage? No. Dread. He thrust his fingers through his hair and hung his head.
“What did you have to do?”
“It’s not what I did.” Jason rocked back and forth as best he could in the car, grounding out curse after curse. He always did have a flare for the dramatic.
Curiosity got the best of him. “Fine. What do you have to do?”
“I don’t want to talk about it.”
“Come on, Jas. It can’t be that bad.”
“Not that bad?” He jerked upright, his glare narrow and precise. “Have you ever lost a bet to a McKoy?” Jeremy shook his head. “Then you have no idea how bad it will be.”
He had an idea. Bailey was as bad as Jason when it came to one-upping him with insults. Jeremy could only imagine what she had in mind as a consequence for losing a bet, especially after their little spat last night.
“You better hope this works.” He pulled a tablet from the go bag they’d brought with them. “Does your boss know you switched up the plan?”
“I didn’t ask him.”
“Are you shitting me?” Jason laughed. “You changed the assignment and made an unauthorized purchase.”
“Technically, I didn’t purchase anything. I borrowed your tickets.”
“Dude, you just committed TREX suicide, as if you weren’t already on your way out. Don’t look at me like that. You and I both know I’m the only reason you’re still in.”
“That’s bullshit.” Jeremy gritted his teeth so hard his jaw popped. “You didn’t even know about TREX until me.”
“Oh, whatever. TREX recruited us both. You may have been recruited right out of college, but I wasn’t far behind you. Two totally different divisions recruited us. Hell, when they ran facial recognition on me and you came up, they were as shocked as I was. Learning that my twin brother worked for the same agency and never told me sucks, bro. It’s not just about you.”
Of course not. He never could have a conversation with his brother without it turning into something about the great and powerful Jason Bowman. The biggest thing to ever happen to Anacortes. He may be twelve minutes older than Jeremy, but he was still the most immature agent in all of TREX, using words like dude and bro like he was still in high school.
The instant TREX brought in Jason, everyone compared Jeremy to him. Jason, the stronger of the Bowman brothers. Jason, the more charming of the Bowman brothers. Jason, Jason, Jason. The minute he’d appeared, Jeremy had disappeared.
It was high school all over again. He’d hated it then and hated it now.
Jeremy glared straight ahead and tightened his jaw. “We’ve lost our opening. We’ll have to think of another way in.”
“No.” Jason shook his head.
“No?”
“Quit thinking of this as a job. Dude, this is the girl of your dreams. You’ve wanted her since forever. Now’s your chance. She’s single. You’re single. You’ve already got the awkward first orgasm out of the way.”
He looked at him.
“What? That’s funny.”
“Do I look like I think it’s funny?”
Jason rolled his eyes. “You are seriously too uptight. I’m definitely going to recommend we give this to another team. You need the time off.�
�
“No.”
“Jer, you need to relax.”
“This is ours,” he told him with no uncertainty. “I’ll find the money.”
“Even if it proves her guilt?” They exchanged glances. No words spoken. They didn’t need them. “Fine. Let me help.”
Screw that. Jeremy didn’t have to ask for clarification. He knew exactly what Jason wanted to help him with, and it wasn’t the job. If he had any chance with Bree, he had to know he’d earned her love on his own, not due to his brother’s involvement. “I don’t need your help.”
“The hell you don’t. Last night proved that. You were the one insisting I go with you to her room.”
“To stop me.”
“Oh, bullshit.” Jason ran his fingers through his hair. “You brought me with you to push you. You need me, bro. Let me help.”
“No.”
“Damn it. I can’t believe what a stubborn asshole you’re being about this. Why won’t you let me help you?”
Jeremy remained silent.
“Give me one good reason.”
“No.”
“Seriously, bro. What the hell is your problem?”
“Jason,” he growled, close to pulling over and pummeling his twin. “Drop it.”
“Coward.”
“Because I can’t lose her!” he snapped, pissed he admitted it out loud. He stole a look at his brother. After several seconds laboring his breathing to regain some sense of control, he spoke again. “If I bring you in, I will.”
“What the hell are you talking about?”
“You know exactly what I’m talking about.” He forced out a bitter laugh as he stared at the road. “You think I cook the breakfasts, leave you to entertain our guest, escort her home, as a way to avoid her? Like having a conversation with her would somehow betray my feelings for Bree?”
“That’s exactly what I think.”
“You’ll get the girl,” he admitted quietly, too ashamed to say it any louder. He hated envying his brother on this or anything else. Losing Bree would be hard enough. Losing her to his twin would kill him. “You always get the girl. It’s pointless for me to join in on any conversation. She’s always completely fixated on you. I’m just the sidekick.”
The hurt washing over Jason’s expression twisted in Jeremy’s gut. Jesus, it was like a dagger to the heart. He hadn’t meant to hurt him with his words. But he did, damn it. He should have kept his mouth shut. It was too late to take it back now.
“Listen.” Jason spoke in a soft voice, way too goddamn gentle. “You know there’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you. You have one of my kidneys and several pints of blood as proof of that. You’re not only my brother, you’re also my best friend. Even if I wanted her for myself—which I don’t, so stop glaring at me—I’d never do that to you. Bree has always been your girl. I will back away. I will step it up. You just tell me what you want me to do.”
“I don’t know.” That sucked to admit. “I lost her that night. I lost her because I was too much of a chicken shit to do anything about it. I watched her walk away and let her marry another guy.”
“And you think if she starts to fall for me, you’ll turn back into that chicken shit and do nothing but watch her walk away again.”
He didn’t answer and didn’t have to. Jason already knew he’d nailed it. Jeremy avoided that knowing look now burning into the side of his face.
“Why do you think she went to the party that night?”
“To say goodbye.” Even as he said it, he didn’t believe it. Judging by that look on Jason’s face, he knew the real reason why as well.
“She came to have you stop her.”
Deep down, Jeremy knew that. Yet he hadn’t stopped her. He’d experienced the most incredible kiss of his life and then let the woman who’d delivered it just walk away. “Instead, I let her go.”
“Then it’s time we do whatever it takes to get her back.”
“It’s too late.” Jeremy shook his head.
“It’s never too late.”
TEN
What happened to his brother?
Jason stole glances at his twin, wishing he had a way of reaching him and knowing he couldn’t. He hadn’t been able to talk to him for a while now, not without worrying about the silent treatment that always followed. Like now.
That attack had changed Jeremy Bowman, and not for the better. He used to be adventurous. He used to embrace challenges, always looking for a way to conquer them and in record time. Now, he shied away from anything he didn’t already know he’d master. It was unsettling, seeing his brother turn into a shell of who he used to be and not being able to do a damn thing about it.
“Let’s go over the financials,” he offered. He had to get them talking again. He hated the silence. For days, he’d sat at that hospital bed, holding his brother’s hand and willing him to survive. Days of silence. Days not knowing whether he’d be celebrating a miracle or burying his brother. Days he’d never slept, too worried he’d wake to the worst. That’s what silence meant to him now. He hated it, hated the memory. Hated that feeling of helplessness. Hated the endless quiet.
“We already went over them on the way up yesterday.” Jeremy slid into another lane, his attention bouncing between the road and Bree’s car. “I doubt anything’s changed.”
“I’ll see if there’s any new intel.”
With a long, drawn out sigh, Jeremy nodded. Jason reached into the backseat and grabbed the satellite link to TREX’s HQ, attaching it to the tablet. His brother sighed again as if listening to the intel was somehow so much work. He wanted to slap him on the back of his head the way their mom still did when one of them pouted.
Jeremy definitely needed that smack right about now.
Ignoring him, Jason linked up to the satellite and surfed the headlines as he waited for it to connect to TREX’s database. He read them out loud to kill the silence. “Some kid held up a convenience store and took off on foot. Seattle PD caught up with him within the hour.”
“K-9?”
“Yep. Dumbass. He may as well have left a trail of raw meat.” Moving onto the next one, he read, “Looks like The Donald is gaining in the polls.”
Jeremy cracked a smile. Finally. He’d snapped out of his mood. They happened more and more frequently. It worried him, but he remained silent as he scrolled through the headlines. That spark in his brother’s eyes had him eager to find something with shock value. Coming up empty, he went for broke and pulled up the entertainment section. “Our favorite famous couple broke up.”
“Ross and Rachel?”
“I don’t even know who that is,” he lied. Everyone knew who they were. “Kermit and Miss Piggy.”
“The puppets?”
“Muppets,” he corrected, annoyed. They used to watch reruns of the show as kids and would pick out which character resembled their own personality the most. Right now, Jeremy was the perfect old man in the balcony, finding the negative in everything.
No reaction aside from a grunt. Luckily, the database came up at the same time. Jason entered the required detail and was just about to hit the search button when he glanced at the lower right corner. Powered by Goggles, Inc. “Holy shit. TREX, too?”
Jeremy immediately tensed. “What is it? Tell me.”
“It’s nothing.”
“Goddamn it!” His twin punched the dash.
Jason blinked, shocked and disappointed at yet another thing that had changed with his brother and had only gotten worse these past three years. He used to have such an even keel. Now, he screamed and punched dashboards. “You need to take TREX up on that therapy, bro.”
“Tell me what has you dropping your jaw.”
“TREX uses Goggles.”
“Bree’s company?” This time, Jeremy’s mouth fell open.
He nodded. “We’re one of the agencies in bed with her. Dude, if she’s really doing what she’s being accused of…”
“No wonder TREX is involved,” his brother fi
nished as he set his jaw and tightened his grip on the steering wheel. “It’s not to protect the other agencies’ asses. It’s to protect our own.”
* * * *
“Speaking of protecting one’s own ass,” Jason mused. Jeremy rolled his eyes. Leave it to his brother to turn this into a conversation about a body part. “Talk to me about what happened.”
“Why? You were there.”
“I’m not talking about last night and you know it. Come on, man. Spill.”
“No.” He refused to have this conversation. His SAC had grilled him. His director had grilled him. Even TREX’s shrink had grilled him. No one needed to know the truth about that mission. He’d made a mistake, a stupid mistake that had almost cost him his life. He wasn’t a field agent and never would be. The scars from the multiple stab wounds were a constant reminder of that. “Can we talk about something else?”
His twin studied him. “You really are tight-lipped about that night, bro. Why won’t you talk to me?”
“Because it doesn’t involve you. You weren’t there.” He tried not to sound accusatory, but it came out that way. If Jason had been in the field, Jeremy would have stayed in the van where he belonged. Instead, TREX thought replacing one Bowman with another would work.
It hadn’t.
Jason visibly shrank as he dropped his head. His expression fell slack. “You don’t think I know that? I would have been there in a heartbeat, even though it would have cost me my spot in the starting lineup.”
“I know.” Despite Jeremy’s jealousy over his brother, he really did want to see him make it big. He may have been a small fish in a big pond once he left Anacortes, but he had the talent to make it if he wanted it bad enough.
Jason had a chance at something huge. A real chance. He could have been the next Russell Wilson. Tom Brady. Instead, he blew it off the instant Jeremy got hurt. And, in turn, lost his place in the lineup anyway. When Jeremy’s kidneys had failed, Jason didn’t hesitate to give him one of his. It meant giving up his career in the NFL before it ever started. He’d sacrificed his dream in order to keep his brother alive.
It Takes Two Page 9
