I thought for one moment he was going to strike her, but Pearl swiftly turned away. ‘Come, Becca. Let’s head for the gardens. There’s something very unpleasant in the house right now, and I don’t want Baby Ivy anywhere near it.’
There were times when my mother deserved a round of applause. This was the reason why she had made a success of her life, why and how she had pulled herself through the bad times and back into the good. She was industrious, determined, stubborn, and she could give as good as she got. Nobody got the better of Pearl. These were the qualities I admired, and when she exasperated me, irritated me, this was what I had to remember. This was why I loved her.
I struggled to keep up as she stormed off across the back garden towards the shrubbery.
‘Goodness me,’ she exclaimed when she finally calmed down. She bent and gave Ivy a kiss on the head. ‘What a horrid man, Ivy dear, making threats like that. What’s this incident in the car park, Becca? You didn’t mention anything.’
‘That’s because it wasn’t worth mentioning. He just drove through a big puddle and took great delight in drenching me or you, as I assume he thought I was.’
‘Ha, I’m glad it was you not me,’ Pearl smiled. ‘Well, you know what I mean. You don’t think he’s serious, though, do you, about knowing people? For goodness sake, this is Hampshire, not the East End of London.’
‘No,’ I assured her, although if Nick was to be believed it was quite possible JJ did have connections with the criminal underworld. But I wasn’t going to alarm Pearl by saying so. The car park incident proved JJ had a malicious streak, but I doubted he would really have tried to harm Pearl. ‘Are he and Rita seriously having problems trying for a baby?’ I asked.
‘According to Jack, they are. That’s another reason JJ is in a financial mess. You do know he’s in a financial mess, don’t you?’
I nodded. ‘I had heard something.’
‘The trouble is, Jack hasn’t got the money to bail him out, not any more. He says he’s put more than enough into the marina over the years. JJ has managed the whole thing badly, overspent, over-expanded, and of course, he’s taken money out of the business for that house, his cars, a speedboat, and now I suppose for IVF.’
Thankfully, Pearl had sought guidance from Roger, our trusted accountant, and the proceeds from the sale of Beech Mews had been deposited into the safest possible investment funds. I was glad she had taken sensible advice, and even gladder she had been able to throw the comment about a prenup back in JJ’s face.
We headed on through the shrubbery where the last of the delicate pink rhododendrons’ blossoms were falling to the ground on the summer breeze, like confetti.
‘Do you know,’ Pearl said, blowing a petal from Ivy’s head, ‘I’ve never been to this part of the estate before?’
‘I think this leads to the old kitchen garden,’ I told her, recognising the wall. ‘We must be near Heather and Nev’s cottage.’
‘What do you make of Heather and Nev?’ Pearl mused. ‘I asked her to make the wedding cake ages ago, but so far I’ve seen no evidence that she’s even started. We’ve only got a couple of weeks left.’
‘Perhaps she wants to keep it a secret from you,’ I suggested.
‘Perhaps,’ Pearl gave a shrug. ‘And don’t you find Nev a bit creepy?’
‘Well yes, I do actually,’ I said, ‘but I thought you liked them?’
‘Oh, I do. I suppose I do, Jack certainly seems very happy with their work.’
‘That’s not the same as liking them, though, is it?’ I pointed out.
We had arrived at a single-storey red brick cottage and the kitchen garden, although there was as much evidence of a flourishing allotment as there was of the wedding cake. It looked as if nothing had been touched in the overgrown beds for years.
‘Well, this is a disappointment,’ Pearl confessed, looking confused.
‘Perhaps the intention was always there, they just never got round to it,’ I said, not entirely surprised by the lack of horticultural activity. ‘What about the greenhouse? Maybe they’ve started some plants off in there.’
There were definite signs of life in the greenhouse, and it was a relief to see what looked like a few straggling tomato plants in a grow bag, together with rows of leafy plants in large pots.
I stared at the plants, recognising the foliage with an incredulous sense of dread. No, really? Not here, not at Rivermede in broad daylight, in Jack’s greenhouse? It couldn’t be. Was this what Nick’s surveillance was all about? I gave voice to my fears. ‘Mum, I think they’re marijuana plants.’
‘Oh, don’t be silly, even I know that’s a tomato.’
‘Yes, that’s a tomato, but I’m pretty sure this is a cannabis plant.’
Pearl slapped her hand over Ivy’s face. ‘We can’t let her breathe this in,’ she hissed. ‘We need to get out.’
‘It’s all right, you can’t get high on the plant.’
‘Out, Becca, let’s get out.’
‘No, let me take some pictures.’
‘What for? Surely you’re not going to put them up on Facebook?’
‘Of course not. It’s evidence.’
‘Oh, we can’t involve the police.’
‘It’s a criminal offence.’
‘But what if they’re Freddy’s?’
‘Oh God, I hadn’t thought of that.’ Freddy had only been at Rivermede for a couple of months, and this whole set-up looked far too established to be his responsibility. I also doubted Fred had the technical knowledge or inclination to cultivate his own cannabis plants, but I couldn’t discount the possibility. ‘We need to talk to Fred,’ I said.
‘I’ll skin him alive if he’s got anything to do with this,’ Pearl said, her face grim.
Chapter Twenty-Six
Quite naturally, Freddy denied all knowledge of the set-up in the greenhouse. It was the first time I’d seen him laugh in weeks.
‘Naughty Nev,’ he chuckled, ‘who knew? How’s my girl been today?’
We caught him just as he arrived home from work. He didn’t exactly greet Ivy with open arms, happy to leave her in mine, but he gave her a tickle, which was a step in the right direction. And I knew that later he would carry out the bedtime routine of bath and bottle, under Pearl’s supervision. I realised it was a learning curve, a totally alien learning curve, but Freddy was doing his best.
I left him and Pearl and Ivy to spend their evening together, and retreated to the sanctuary of the flat for a few hours. I would return to the house later for night duty. Within minutes of sitting on the sofa, I nodded off. When I awoke, it was seven and I was starving hungry and my fridge was bare.
I needed food. I didn’t want to visit The Ship, in case Stella asked how work was progressing, nor did I want to hop in the car and head to Portdeane Tesco. Instead, I decided to walk to the Jolly Jack Tar, which did a trendy line in gourmet burgers and fish tacos. Being a warm, sunny evening, the Jolly Jack was packed. All the tables were taken with at least a half-hour wait. I added my name to the list for a table for one, then set off along the riverside path towards Chapman’s Wharf. The lure was too strong.
I found Nick on his deck. He didn’t appear to be doing any surveillance work; instead, he was grilling sausages on a BBQ.
He beckoned me on board. ‘How did you know I was cooking?’ he asked with an easy laugh. ‘Want to join me? I can easily get another couple of sausages out of the fridge.’
‘You don’t have to,’ I said at once. ‘I was going to eat at the Jolly Jack Tar.’
‘Oh, don’t be daft,’ he said. ‘Now that you’re here, you might as well stay. Anyway, I wanted to see you.’
‘You did?’
‘Yeh, you didn’t come quizzing.’
‘Were you disappointed?’ I asked.
‘Extremely,’ he replied. ‘Even more so Chrissie and Craig. We had a whole round on continental cheeses. It would have been right up your street.’
When he returned with the sausages, an
d a bottle of wine, I explained about Ruby.
‘Sounds like a right mess,’ he remarked.
‘It is,’ I agreed. ‘But Ivy is an adorable baby. What else could we do?’
He gave a tense shrug. ‘Of course.’
I’d hit his sensitive spot. Family duty. The edge of a tattoo was just visible on Nick’s right arm, beneath the short sleeve of his T-shirt. That hadn’t been there fifteen years ago. Nor had the muscles or the tan. The outdoor life obviously suited Nick, or perhaps it was the overseas travel. He caught me looking.
‘It’s a Yorkshire Rose,’ he said.
‘Very nice,’ I replied. ‘Is that your only one?’
He pulled his sleeve down as if he was embarrassed. ‘Got drunk one night,’ he said. ‘Have you got any?’
I shook my head. ‘No, I’ve never been that drunk. Freddy’s getting quite a collection, though.’ I looked around at the scene. ‘You’re in a lovely spot here,’ I remarked.
Across the water, the sun was just beginning to dip into the sky behind Portdeane. Inland, Nick had a view straight across the marsh towards a large grey house, which could just possibly have been the van der Plaast mansion, although Max’s New England-style of house wasn’t unique in this affluent location. Perhaps it was the millionaire bookmaker’s, or the dodgy stockbroker’s; any member of Kerridge’s criminal fraternity. Even Aidan apparently had a ‘past’. Perhaps Nick was observing him.
‘I wanted to let you know I found that bloke you asked me to look for,’ Nick said, turning the sausages over. ‘Tristram Markham.’
‘Oh? Thank you.’ I had almost forgotten I’d asked. ‘Where is he?’
‘Still on the Isle of Wight. Parkhurst Prison.’
‘He’s in prison?’ Poor Stella. My one hope of a happy ending – gone.
‘He’s the Deputy Governor.’
‘Ah. That’s interesting.’
‘Is it?’ Nick asked. He came and sat beside me. ‘What is he to you?’
I gave him a brief run-down of my attempts to write Stella’s story. ‘I just thought that maybe if I could get the hold of the children, include their viewpoint, arrange a reunion maybe, it might make the whole thing more appealing.’
‘So you want to speak to him?’
‘Ideally, yes, but to be honest the book’s taking a bit of a back seat right now.’
‘Well, you know where he is. If there’s anything else I can help you with, just ask.’
‘Okay,’ I got out my phone and showed him the pictures of the plants in Jack’s greenhouse. ‘What are these?’
‘I think you know what those are, Rebecca.’
‘Is that why you’re here?’ I asked. ‘Is that why you’re in Kerridge? JJ is farming marijuana. Is that why you’ve been warning us away from Rivermede?’
Nick’s laugh was on par with Freddy’s. ‘If only,’ he said. ‘You think I’d be going to all these lengths to hide out here for a couple of pot plants?’
The wine had gone straight to my head. Sitting here on the deck of The Solstice was the most relaxed I’d felt in days. I joined him with a seductive giggle. ‘Ha-ha, I get it, pot plants. You’re so funny, Nick.’ I gave him a playful punch in the arm. He didn’t look amused. ‘Is JJ really the head of a drug cartel?’ I asked, warming to my theme and seizing the chance to off-load. ‘Goodness knows, he needs money. He could be moving the stuff up and down the river. He’s got that flashy speedboat. He threatened Pearl and I, saying he knew people who could get rid of us. Should we be worried?’
Nick shook his head. ‘I doubt JJ would have the guts to put out a contract for your mother’s murder, tempting though the idea might be.’
‘I’m not sure if that’s reassuring or not,’ I smiled.
‘You know I don’t like you being at Rivermede, full stop.’
‘So you keep saying.’
I leaned back on the deck, enjoying the warmth of the evening sun and the close proximity of his body. I didn’t want to dwell on what Nick was really doing here in Kerridge. He was here, and we were talking, sharing a joke, acting like old friends, casual and without any animosity. That was enough; it was more than enough.
Our arms touched as he stretched out beside me. For a moment, I thought he was going to reach out and kiss me. He turned his face, our eyes met, searching each other for the clues. Could we, should we…
A plume of smoke rose from the BBQ. Nick to jumped to his feet. ‘Christ, I could have set the whole bloody boat on fire,’ he said, flapping the smoke away. ‘I hope you like your sausages well done.’
We ate in a comfortable, familiar silence, the silence of people who’ve known each other for a long time and don’t need to make conversation to enjoy each other’s company.
‘Tell me about Saskia,’ I said eventually, when the food was all finished and I’d helped him clear the dirty plates into The Solstice’s tidy galley kitchen. The boat’s interior was tastefully but sparsely furnished. Nick’s laptop and photographic equipment were laid out on a small table, together with a strategically-placed book on coastal birds. ‘I was prepared to forgive you, but then you turned around and threw that forgiveness into my face,’ I said. ‘Why did you do that? Why wait until I was there at the altar?’
‘It was Freddy,’ he said after a pause. ‘I couldn’t cope with the idea of Freddy coming to live with us.’
‘I don’t understand,’ I said. ‘I don’t understand whatever gave you the idea that he would? Do you not think I would have said, I would have told you something as momentous as that?’
‘No,’ Nick admitted. ‘Perhaps now I do, but not then. I was young, stupid, I suppose. I believed her. I had no reason not to believe her.’
‘You mean it was Saskia? Saskia told you Freddy was mine?’
Nick nodded. ‘Yes. Who else? She said you’d been seeing this boy at school, and then you left without any warning. Then the next minute you were sending her pictures of your baby brother. Why wouldn’t I believe her?’
‘I left the school because Pearl couldn’t pay the fees. You know what kids are like, I was embarrassed. Why didn’t you talk to me? If you suspected I was Freddy’s mother, why didn’t you ask me?’
‘I suppose I was scared of the answer.’
‘And if he had been mine? Why was that such a big problem?’
‘In my job, I could have been sent anywhere, to do anything, you know that. I explained all that when I proposed. I’d got that promotion, I was going to be working on some pretty tough cases.’
‘I agree it was hardly the most romantic proposal ever. If I remember rightly, you suggested we should get married so that I didn’t miss out on a guaranteed lump sum insurance payout and the full police pension, if anything happened to you on the job.’
‘But you still said yes,’ Nick reminded me with a smile. ‘I was just being practical. I was genuinely worried. What if anything did happen to me? Suddenly it wasn’t just you I had responsibility for, it was a six-year-old as well. Or at least, that’s what I told myself. I convinced myself, stupidly, that you and Freddy would be better off without me, without the worry and the danger. I didn’t want to put you both through it.’
‘So, you were being noble?’
‘It’s what I told myself at the time. On reflection, I was probably being incredibly selfish. The truth is, Becs, I wasn’t sure I was ready to take on a child.’
‘And naturally, having planted the idea in your head that you shouldn’t get married, Saskia was there to pick up the pieces?’
‘Yes,’ Nick admitted.
Had Saskia really believed Freddie was my child, or had she made up the whole thing to lure Nick away? Saskia had been the one few school friends I’d confided in about my recall to London. I’d confessed to a family emergency, and I could remember forcing her to swear to secrecy, but I certainly hadn’t mentioned any pregnancy. I was more worried about the shameful implications of the unpaid school fees amongst my wealthy classmates.
‘It seemed as if our life t
ogether would just be too complicated,’ Nick said. ‘I was confused, and Saskia seemed to offer a way out. It was a stupid, cowardly thing to do, and I’m sorry. Truly sorry.’
I believed him. There was something about this new Nick that was very different from the old. He seemed vulnerable, less sure of himself, less invincible.
‘I never slept with her,’ he said, ‘not before the wedding. I never betrayed you, Rebecca.’
I’d been jilted for a bitter misunderstanding. Saskia had broken her promise but exposed the wrong secret.
‘We should have talked,’ I said.
‘Yes,’ he agreed. ‘Instead, we both went off on a tangent, and now, by some strange, bizarre coincidence, we’re here.’
Orange and purple ribbons streaked the sky above Portdeane. Soon it would be dark.
We both spoke at the same time.
‘I should be getting back,’ I said.
‘Stay,’ said Nick.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
There was that look on his face again as he searched for the answers he wanted, the answers I wanted to give him. Were we reading the same signals? Were we on the brink of something quite momentous?
The dilemma of wanting something you know you can’t have. ‘Oh Nick,’ I sighed. ‘I can’t. You know I can’t. I have to get back. I’m on night duty, the baby.’
It was the repeating pattern of our relationship. How many times had I said it before on broken dates? I had to get back. I had to collect Freddy, from nursery, from school, from a friend’s, to babysit while Pearl went on a book promo or a business meeting. The whole reason it hadn’t worked out before. Fifteen years later, and the cycle continued.
‘Yes, of course. I’ll walk you home.’ The emotionally charged ‘stay’ had been replaced with stilted politeness. His whole demeanour had changed.
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