by D. M. Burns
“It’s no big deal. Is Reese here?” He asks.
“No. She’s probably with Rage. You need to let that dream go Jake. It’ll more than likely get you killed.” I deadpan. His face scrunches up in disgust.
“Where’s your drink at?” He asks.
“I’m sorta waiting on Renegade to get here.” He thrusts a solo cup in my hand with that golden boy smile playing on his battered face. “Thanks.” I shrug my shoulders and do the smell test.
“It’s hunch punch. You’ll like it. Drink up.” He takes a pull off his beer.
“Where’s your backdoor whore at?” I ask on a smirk. Zero shits are given to the bitch that loves to hate my Reese’s Pieces. That hooker knows that both her wanna-be undercover lovers are lost for my BFF. Both Rage and Jake want Reese. Jealousy seeps from her cheer captain pores. That’s an ugly shade of foundation to be sporting around.
“Damn. You females are brutal.” He chuckles.
“Nope. I’m honest. Ansley Adam’s is a bitch, period. End of story.” He nods his head in agreement.
“So, you and Renegade? Is that solid?” He asks.
“Are you window shopping, Jake?” I quirk my eyebrow at him.
This guy has no chance in hell. He’s pretty to look at but I can tell he lacks in the bedroom. Probably in-game and equipment, equal disappointment. I’m not ready to admit it through the school hallways yet but I love Renegade. Even if I didn’t, this shit right here would go nowhere. The boy wants Reese and I’m no runner up constellation prize nor interested in the least.
“If I was, you wouldn’t be window placement occupancy. That’s for discount sales only, Asia." He winks at me. "You’d be preferred client’s choice and backroom stock quality.” He wiggles his eyebrows. Can’t bullshit a bullshitter boy.
“Be careful doing that with your face. It looks painful.” I giggle. I turn up the drink, kill it and then level him with the truth. “Jake, I like you, but the friend zone is where you belong. You’re never coming out of that position, ever.”
“From the moment the crime lord cousins appeared at our school, you and Reese think you're untouchable.” He smirks with an evil glint shining through his intentions. It’s beaming out of those sapphire eyes too.
“No. That’s not true and you know it, Jake. Reese has loved Rage since she was seven. As for me, well let’s be honest, I’d beat the shit out of you.” I point my finger at him. “Plus, I’m no ivory tower queen. Every palace deserves a queen, and this is definitely a castle.” I hold my hands up and circle around his casa to try and present my case. That last part sounded a little slurred though. What the hell?
“You can be my chambermaid though. How about it? That is until Rage disappears and Reese finds her way back to me.” He chuckles and it sounds foreign to my ears, echoed and sluggish. I balance myself against the island and try to shake off the dizziness. What the hell?
“Jake, what was in that drink?” My body sways to the side. Jake catches me and walks us toward the stairs. “I need to sit down.”
“Are you okay? Come with me. I got you.” Jake says.
Waking up with my mouth feeling like it was scrubbed dry with sandpaper along with a massive headache that has my stomach rolling. My senses are pointing to a very fucked for life situation here. Think, Asia. What the fuck and why? Trying to trudge up my last clear thought only intensives my throbbing head.
Even exerting the mental effort, I can’t recall shit. I roll myself into a sitting position and I latch onto the sheets to keep from tipping over the side of the bed. Where the fuck am I? The room’s spinning out of control at full force. Am I at Ren’s? Am I at home? Damnit.
The groan that escapes my lips only intensifies the sledgehammer effect pounding out in my brain. I palm both sides of my head willing it to stop. Opening my eyes, I blink several times before I can make out the objects that surround me.
The silky nature of the fabric that’s wrapped around my waist feels cold and unfamiliar. What the hell? I look down. Shock slams into me when I realize that I’m naked. Completely fucking naked. My heart rate automatically starts to violently hammer out in my chest shooting a panicked pulse throughout my body. I bind the sheet around me quickly with shaky hands. Noting that my skin is now clammy and I feel like I’m going to throw up.
My head whips around searchingly and I automatically brace my palms back on my temples squeezing my eyes shut. Fuck… That’s torture. I rock myself back and forth for a few moments, tears of dread falling freely from my eyes like rain droplets from an angry storm cloud. I need to figure out where I am and assess the damage. Let’s try that shit one more time. Slowly, I open my eyes and do a one-eighty through a squinted view.
I remember this space from the Mask-Off party a few weeks back. This is where Reese and I stored our purses while we were here.
Why the fuck am I naked?
How the hell did I get in this room?
Why am I still here?
Hold up… I recognize this room. I recognize this fucking bed. And I recognize the naked motherfucker beside me too, Jake. Oh, God…
chapter 12 - Renegade
Was Chance a cheating piece of shit? I don’t fucking know. Maybe he was. Will Asia find out? No. Honestly, it was one big fabricated lie. All of which was orchestrated in my mind as I carried Asia’s pissed off, warm, luscious little body out to my truck. Let me tell you something else too, I don’t feel bad in the slightest. No guilt. No shame. No shit, really. Fuck your judgments too. You have no clue why I am the way I am. So, save that shit.
Okay… Okay… Yeah, maybe I’m the real douche bag here, but as I previously stated, my damns are not given. My cement is sturdy. No cracks in my moral wall, it’s unflawed. I’m holding it together pretty tight. I’m damn sure not going to lose any peaceful sleep tonight or the foreseeable future because of that hook up gone wrong. Cause right about now, she’s feeling like a piece of shit for her fuckboy choices, hitting Rebel and thinking I’m a god damn hero. Boom. Victory. It’s the simple shit in life that makes me a happy bastard.
Let’s not forget the best part. She won’t be calling Chance the cunt for a liquid love date night session, ever. That shit had me ready to kill a motherfucker. I wasn’t seeing red rage; I was visualizing the next up and coming taped off, crime scene in the making. Murder mayhem. With Chance’s face as the focal point for future picture placement in the unsolved murder mystery scrapbook. I’d have the local authorities baffled for years to come, believe that.
People truly have no idea how deep in the dark danger zone this mind can run. Especially in a place where Asia doesn’t exist. I know. I lived it for five years. Never shared my thoughts of fatal fuckery though. I compacted that evil into the depths of my soul. Quarantined the rotting parts and cut off the infected area or so I thought.
It was the same soul that I thought died years ago. Until she came back. Funny enough, I didn’t know it even had a pulse till I heard those words slip off her lips to fuckboy, “We can share some liquid love one night soon, yeah?” The fuck you say… It was like someone stuck a freshly sharpened pencil into my god damn eardrum.
That weak, barely their rhythm came back to life with a pounding effect that would rival that of an Olympic gymnastics’ gold medalist. Set free in a room full of fucking Redbull with a straw. But it was old Chance the cunt’s response to Asia that brought everything into perspective. “Any type of love your willing to shared is fine by me….”
Fucking really, player? Is that right? Well, how about I share some of the love I have for the size eleven shoes on my motherfucking feet right up your ass, you dick. Chance was about to run out of chances. I was damn near close to fucking his pretty-boy face straight the hell up. Dirty south style with a side of southern charm just for him. Yeah, I heard all that bullshit that his ass was spreading butter thick, little bitch.
That entire projector presentation of a future life spent with get-togethers shared around Rage and Reese accompanied with Asia and someone o
ther than me fucked your boy up. One hundred. It sent out a reminder of exactly where Asia belongs. That’s with me. Yeah, I’m as shocked as you are. There’s work that needs to be done though.
First, I’ve got to figure out how to deal with my pent-up hatred. My Hate Wars are real. They come to life without warning and I need to learn how to control that shit. That’s a must before I can act on the frozen iceberg that’s thawing out at an unhealthy rate in my chest. It’s drowning me slowly with each day that Asia’s back. It’s like Hell took up residency in my stomach turning the ice age in my chest around and producing a sea of liquid love throughout my veins, Jesus. That god damn phrase is stuck in my head now.
Watching Asia’s dispirited frame climbing her steps one by one, I grip my steering wheel, white-knuckling the bastard to death. I wanted to jerk her across this console of my truck and demand that she explained herself for her past discretions. Scream at her to let me in that fucking head of hers so I can understand.
Or even better, jog up those remaining stairs, toss her over my shoulder again and carry her the rest of the way. Final destination, her apartment. No, scratch that shit. Final resting place, her bed. Naked with my dick rooted deep within her. Crazy motherfucker that I am be damned. She’s my punishment for some evil sin in a past life, I’m sure of it.
None of that’ll work though. Not until I let the bullshit go from our past. I can’t stop the twitch. That insider spy demands the missing pieces from historical events. I need the sinister secrets. Rage’s reminder of my own advice from years ago slaps at the back of my head and clutches at my heart.
“Fuck the minutes before and fuck the minutes beyond right now.”
Forgiveness is free. And in my case, the necessary key. I just don’t know if I can swallow much less digest the pasts spoon-fed poison. It’s the only fucking way I’m going to be able to move on to a better place. More importantly, move on to a better place with Asia at my side. Shit. Scrubbing my palm across my face, I wait until Asia’s moving through her front door until I put my truck in reverse and head home.
Maybe sleeping peaceful tonight won’t be so damn easy after all. With the imaginary Pornhub flick that’s playing out in my head starring Chance the cunt as he pounds out the dick slaps in the liquid love confines between Asia legs, straight fuckery. I’m thinking that even a visit from the sandman himself would prove to be challenging at this point. God damnit.
chapter 13 – renegade
five years ago
All the bodies in this hallway parts for me as I lock my eyes down on my unsuspecting target. She’s a hot little number today. A high ponytail pulls that brown beautiful thick mane up off her shoulders, showcasing that elegant neckline that I’d love to sink my teeth into. Asia is a stunning thoroughbred. She has a Ceridian blue wrap dress on over those luscious curves paired with thigh-high heeled black boots. Jesus…
Those damn heels were made for inspirational sex solicitation and should be wrapped around my waist, now. A repeat performance of the other night is needed, anticipated, and welcomed. My dick wants to test the boundaries of Creekside High’s rules for a PDA porn display right in the middle of these overcrowded halls. My beautiful chaos, her. Shit, I think the teacher’s lounge is empty right now. She’s so worth the possibility of expulsion.
Creeping up against her banging petite body from behind, where I fucking belong. I take a deep breath-catching that fresh laundry scent and sweet plum paradise madness in my lungs. I whisper delicately against her soft skin. “I’ve been looking for your brown sugar eyes.”
Asia startles and leaps to the side as if I was Michael Myers himself complete with a machete in one hand and Freddy Krueger gloved finger knives equipped on the other. The aftereffects causing her to drop the books she was gripping to her chest. She looks like a girl caught up in the middle of a fucking massive heart attack. What the actual hell?
“Shit… Sorry babe. Calm down, its only me. Damn.” I say. My brows draw together. and I step forward to wrap her in my arms but she pulls back. The fuck…
“You scared me, Ren.” She stammers. No shit, my little ninja nightmare extraordinaire.
Asia has been with Reese this past week and I’ve missed my girl bad. Ever since Rage turned himself in, Reese has been nothing short of an emotional ticking time bomb. Hell, she smacked the flesh off my face when I told her she couldn’t visit him. Fuck. I get it. But I was only following his direct orders. It was a promise I made to Rage. One that I’d love to break but I can’t.
Reese kindly told me where I could stick my dick. Unfortunately, that wasn’t in her best friend where I prefer it to be. Nah, she suggested I cram it up my own ass. That entire theory wasn’t humanly or medically possible though. But the concept Reese was hinting at was quite clear, I could go fuck myself. Which if the shoe was on the other foot and it was Asia, I’d choke her little ass out. So, I get it. Her response was legit. Hopefully one day Reese will forgive me.
This bullshit hit with Rage being sent off to prison is hard on all of us, but Reese is really fuck up. To the point that I want to take her on a shoe shopping spree just to make her feel better. Maybe, I can give Asia the card and let her and Reese both go, that’s an idea. Point is, I’ve had no choice but to share my brown-eyed girl with her best friend. Begrudgingly but rightfully so.
Bending over, I collect Asia’s books off the floor that she dropped. When I stand her entire body suggests that she wants to flee the scene. In the other direction. Away from me and right out the front doors. Last night I was at practice and didn’t get to see her. She said her training ran late too. It happens to us both occasionally. Schedules conflict but we find our way back to each other.
Stepping forward, I offer her books over and she sheepishly takes them. Her eyes stay locked on the books she’s cradling in her arms. Something’s bad wrong here. There’s an invisible layered wall between us. What the actual fuck?
“Baby… Give me those brown sugar eyes.” I whisper.
She peels her focus off the lit book and zooms in on me and damn. That serrated knife in my gut is harsh. I shut her locker door, take her by the upper arm. Weaving our bodies through the crowd and down the hall to the video room. The techie fuckers should be at lunch. If not, they can move their asses somewhere else. I’ve got to talk to my girl and figure out what the hell is wrong.
“Renegade… What are you doing?”
Her voice is barely above a whisper. I ignore that. The nosey fuckers in the hallway are all watching, listening. I don’t give a shit. Fuck them. Unlike everyone else, I don’t give a shit what others think. This is between me and my brown-eyed girl. I open the door and let my eyes do a visual scan of the place. Thank fuck the rooms empty. I walk both of us in and shut the door behind us.
“Babe, what’s wrong?” I ask. I scrub my hand through my hair. My body feels the desperate energy building up. It’s closing in all around me. I have no idea why. Gut instincts are telling me this is fucking bad.
She hugs her books closer to her chest, avoiding eye contact with me. Who is this closed-off girl? And what did she do with my girlfriend? Where’s my fearless fright-night ninja? The one that would twist the raisins off Rage without blinking twice.
Taking the necessary step to dismiss the intentional space she put between us, I slip my hands on both sides of her face and she flinches. That stings. I ignore that and bend down eye level to see those baby brown eyes. Direct eye contact is needed right now, nothing less.
“Talk to me, Asia. Is it Reese?” She shakes her head no. “Are your parents giving you a hard time again?” They have a bad habit of pushing my girl toward goals that they, themselves, want not Asia.
“No. Reese is hurting bad but that’ll take time. My parents are cool for now.” Then what the fuck? I lean in and press a kiss to her forehead. Fuck, talk to me then. She's fragile and I’m scared to push too hard right now.
“Babe, what’s going on then? Talk to me. I’ve run out of guesses.” I pull back and lo
ok at her. She casts her focus to the floor again.
“I submitted my portfolio to D&G Fashion. They’re impressed with my fashion foresight and makeover abilities. They’ve offered me a job right after graduation.” Well, shit that’s no reason to act like death is knocking on the front door.
“Damn babe. That’s fucking awesome. You should be happy about that. We’ll celebrate tonight. In two short months, you’ll be living your dream. This is happy shit, right?” I smile wide until her expression comes into full view. My heart sinks. “Is this not happy shit babe?” My eyes bounce between those liquid brown sugar orbs. I want to pull the baby shaking syndrome move on her.
“It’s in LA Ren.” She whispers.
Excuse me? What the fuck did she say? Yeah, I didn’t see that one coming. She told me that she was going to find work in Atlanta, with me. We talked about this. My focus is centered around making it through the next couple of months here at Creekside High, managing Club Chaos and my brothers. She knows Rage is out of the picture now. I can’t take off and leave my brothers behind.
I was going to marry this girl. My soul knows what it wants, her. Just her… I thought we were on the same page. Shit, she’s not even reading from the same textbook as me. Or in the god damn library parking lot for that matter. It feels like two hands are wrapped around my lungs squeezing the air from my dreams. Killing my body’s natural ability to breathe, fuck. I drop my hold on her and rake my hands through my hair.
“I thought you were going to stay with me here in Atlanta Asia.” I cross my hands over my chest and focus on her.
“Well, this opportunity is huge. I really think I’ll regret it if I don’t see it through.” Regret… I’m getting familiar with that shit right about now.
She looks off to the side. Still no eye contact. There’s more taking place here. I feel it in my gut. Right next to that serrated knife that’s being twisted. The dumb motherfucker that I am, I ask the question that I already know the shit answer to.
