by Maia Starr
“I’m not blaming her. I’m saying most of this is coming from the fact that we all want to claim her. Am I wrong?”
He looks between us, and neither Reed nor I are willing to disagree. I mean, he is right. I can’t stop watching her nowadays, and every thought I have is of her.
“And of course it doesn’t help that she hasn’t chosen one of us yet. We can’t force her to pick yet, and it’s screwing with all of us.”
Reed licks his lips. “Well, maybe if you two would just back off and leave her to me, we wouldn’t have this problem to begin with.”
“She’s not yours, Reed,” I say. “I’m the one that was originally picked out to be her bodyguard, meaning she was supposed to be my mate from the very start. It wasn’t until her paranoia took over that she demanded you two as well.”
“But that just isn’t the case anymore, Hayden,” Sven argues. “Each one of our inner dragons is clamoring for her, but she seemingly likes all of us.” He pauses. “Besides, two of us are going to have to back down once she does choose, or else we’ll destroy our clan and be forced to go our separate ways. We’ve pushed her to the brink of sickness because of how strong our desires are, and now she’s suffering for it. Is that what you two want?”
Sven’s got us there. I shake my head. “No, it isn’t.”
Reed just spits on the ground.
Sighing heavily, Sven motions for us both to come closer to him. He claps us both on the backs and looks between us. “Look, if we let this continue, then we’ll probably kill each other. We’ve got to hold off of vying for her love for a while, at least until we deal with Maxen, okay? Once that’s out of the way, all four of us will have clear heads, and we’ll have her choose one of us. There won’t be any hard feelings now, or later. Agreed?”
I laugh. “You know, I thought I was the one who was supposed to give these kinds of speeches.”
“You can’t do nearly as well as Sven here,” Reed says, smiling himself.
Before we can go any further, the front door opens and Travis steps outside. He motions at us to come inside. “I have a diagnosis, and I want all three of you inside to hear it.”
With that, we all exchange glances and trudge in, hoping Erika’s sickness isn’t too bad.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Erika
When Doctor Travis originally came in, I had thought he seemed nice. He smiled at me, shook my hand, and gave me simple instructions for a few tests. He asked me about the symptoms of my sickness; I explained it all to him quickly. Taking notes, he just nodded and eventually took some of my blood, and finally, he gave me a box of pregnancy tests.
And then he walked out of my bedroom.
Now, Doctor Travis walks back in the door, flanked by Hayden, Reed, and Sven.
“I’ll make this as brief as I can since I have a clinic to run back in the city.” Doctor Travis glances at me, and then to the three guys. “Erika is pregnant.”
It’s so quiet, I can hear Sven’s intake of breath from across the room. I can barely speak because my eyes are so wide and my jaw doesn’t want to close to help me form any words. Hayden stumbles to the side and then catches himself. “Say again?”
“Erika is pregnant.” Doctor Travis says again. “Though that’s my conclusion after only a few tests and a little while with her. I took her blood, so I’ll go back to my clinic and run a blood test to see.” He quickly packs all of his doctorly tools and equipment. “Erika, I want to keep getting updates from you over the next month. After I confirm for sure that you are pregnant, you can come in and we’ll discuss next steps.”
I blink, staring up at him. My mind is blank.
Doctor Travis then pushes past Reed and Sven, who are glancing between him and me with wide eyes. “I’ll be on my way then. If there’s any changes, let me know immediately. Oh, and—” Doctor Travis pokes his head back around, “—whichever one of you is the father, take good care of her.”
And then he’s gone.
Nobody says a word while the doctor walks out the front door, climbs into his car, and drives off. We listen to his engine grow faint.
Tears sting my eyes as I lean forward and down, bringing my hands up to cover my face. I’m not sure what kind of tears these are.
Suddenly, Hayden throws his arms out, palms up. “All right, before anyone speaks, all I want to say is...well, I’m the father.”
His words don’t register with me first, but I watch him silently now. His eyes meet mine, and he smiles. He’s happy.
Reed shakes his head vigorously as he steps forward. “Woah, woah! Hell no! You are not the father, Hayden. Don’t be so cocky, because I’m that kid’s father.”
But then Sven steps up too, puffing out his chest. “You’re both wrong. Erika’s kid is mine.”
Glancing at me, Hayden sighs. “You’ve had sex with all of us, haven’t you?”
Shaking, I nod. “I didn’t think about...getting pregnant. There’s so much that’s happened recently.”
Hayden comes and kneels next to me while I sit in my bed. He grabs my hand, holding it, and smiles up at me. His smile is still as bright as always, and a wave of calm overwhelms me. “Look, I don’t blame you. But now you’re going to have a kid.” Hayden blinks at me. “You are going to keep the kid, right?”
I nod instinctively. Even if I’ve had barely any time to process what just happened, I know I want this kid. I’ve dreamed of having one for years. It’s just...the timing. “I am going to keep him, or her.”
“Yeah, but you don’t know who the father is now,” Reed says. Looking at his clanmates, he glares icy daggers. “That chat we had before, fellas? That goes out the window. This is my child, and I won’t take no for an answer.”
I try to speak up, but Hayden suddenly jerks to his feet, marching up to Reed. “Like hell it is, Reed. I’m the father, as I’ve already said.”
Sven pries them apart. This scene has unfolded before my eyes many times before now, so I try to raise my voice, but Sven cuts me off. “I didn’t want to do this, but I’m pulling seniority here. Even if there’s a chance her kid isn’t biologically mine, I would be the best father here. End of story.”
“Hell no!”
“All of you shut up and listen to me!” I scream at the top of my lungs.
All three men finally notice I’m trying to speak and all turn to me, eyes wide. I’m breathing hard now, clutching my chest. All I want to do is rest.
Clearing my throat, I look up, frowning, glancing at each one of them to tell them that I’m dead serious. “There’s only one possible solution to this, unless you all want to kill each other. All three of you will be the father and help raise my child. And all three of you will be my mate. You’ll all share me, or none of you will have the baby or me.”
All three stiffen and crease their brows. Reed runs both hands through his hair while Sven crosses his arms and leans against the wall. Hayden is twitching. “Erika,” Hayden says, “that’s not a light request to make.”
My heart is on fire right now. “I’m not requesting anything, Hayden. I’m telling all three of you. You don’t all have to decide right now, but what I do know is that I want all of you. If you can work together in this...I know we’ll all be so, so happy.”
The trio glance between each other, and after a minute of staring, they all nod. Hayden looks back at me. “Let’s get this whole Maxen business out of the way first, and then we can talk about this more, okay? In the meantime, just let us know if you need anything.”
I nod, smiling sheepishly up at them. “Then give me some time to rest again. I need to think about this.”
So the trio shuffles out, leaving me to lean back in bed and stare up at the ceiling.
Chapter Thirty
Reed
Four days pass as we continue to settle into our life at Sven’s home in the Redwoods. I want to say it’s been going more smoothly ever since we found out Erika was pregnant, but that just isn’t the case.
Ever since that day, Hayden, Sve
n, and I have been avoiding each other. We said we’d wait until after Maxen is dealt with to figure out how we were going to solve this whole mess, but with Maxen still a no show, and us stuck at this small cottage indefinitely, it’s hard to keep ourselves cool, calm, and collected.
We’ve all recognized that none of us can really keep ourselves composed around Erika for this long, so we’ve begun to simply stay away from each other. Going out on our regular patrols through the woods helps, but it still can’t prevent us from bumping into each other every now and then.
Like now. I’m coming back from one such patrol, trudging up the front steps silently, and pushing open the front door. The cottage is so quiet now. I can practically hear Hayden speaking to Erika in her room. Grumbling to myself, I stuff my hands in my pockets and walk to her bedroom. I knock once and then open the door.
I find Hayden seated on a chair on the other side of the bed. He’s watching Erika, his mouth open. Erika isn’t looking at him though; she’s gripping a book, flipping the page as I walk inside. Hayden and I spare a single glance. I don’t even need to speak for him to understand that it’s his turn. I can see by the way he glares at me that he’s not happy to be leaving Erika alone with me.
When he walks out, he brushes my shoulder and then slams the door shut.
Scratching my head, I walk around to sit down in the chair Hayden had just been sitting in. “So, nice weather today, huh?”
Erika glances at me, her eyes blank, but otherwise doesn’t speak to me.
Growling, I lean back and look out the window, seeing nothing but forest all around us. Another few minutes pass us in silence. Erika flips another page of her book.
Leaning forward, I tap the armrest to get her attention. It works, and she’s suddenly gazing at me with those beautiful amber orbs of hers. “Look, why won’t you speak to me? Were you speaking to Hayden?”
Sighing, Erika’s features soften, and she lowers the book. “I’ve barely been speaking to any of you.”
“Are you mad at us?”
“Yes, I am. I won’t speak that much to any of you until you can all stop acting like children.” She looks me directly in the eyes, and I realize how much she’s grown since the day we first met in the Fiery Hearts building. “Stop avoiding each other. Stop glaring at each other. Stop all acting like you’re the only one for me. I want all of you to come together as my family.” Lowering her head, she frowns. “I don’t think I could bear losing any of you.”
My heart beats slowly, and sadness engulfs me. “Erika, do you know how difficult it is for three shifters to share a mate? Of course, there’ll be fights and bad spots. Each one of us has an inner dragon clamoring for you. It’s difficult to just quench that desire.”
Now she’s climbing out of bed and to her feet. “Do you know what else will be difficult? Telling my baby, when he or she grows up, that he had three fathers, and one of them either killed the others out of jealousy or forced them to leave.” I stiffen at her harsh tone. She looks back at me. “Can you imagine the look on that child’s face? It’s one of the few things I think about now. My whole life is changing almost daily now, and it doesn’t help when you three decide to get into a fight. Aren’t you stronger than this?”
Rising to my feet, I follow her out of the bedroom. “Where are you going?”
“To get some fresh air. If I don’t, I may just go crazy.”
“Then I’m coming with you.”
“I wouldn’t expect anything less.”
Frowning, I follow close behind her, holding open doors for her. She glances at me a few times as we march outside. I come to a stop on the porch, thinking she just wants to stand outside for a while, but then she keeps on walking, angling towards the dirt road. Frowning deeper, I follow after her. “Wait, Erika. You shouldn’t wander too far from the house.”
She crosses her arms as she walks. “What does it matter? You’ll be with me. Unless you think you’re getting too weak to guard me all on your own?”
I can’t help but smile wryly. “Damn, when did you get so bold? That’s kind of hot, Erika.”
She glares over her shoulder and motions for me to hurry up. So, jogging up to her side, I march on next to her, feeling her eyes on me. “Let’s not tell Sven or Hayden I left the house, okay?”
“Sounds good to me.”
Chapter Thirty-One
Erika
Our walk along the road is quiet and serene. The only sounds that reach our ears, or at least the only sounds I can hear, are those of our shoes crunching on the packed dirt and bushes rustling with animals darting through the forest. But then again, it’s been quiet like this almost the entire time we’ve been at Sven’s cottage. It is slowly driving me insane.
Reed, Sven, and Hayden are all avoiding each other because of me. It’s gotten so awkward around the house because of it, and I’d rather not be the only one speaking.
Like they said, once Maxen is gone, we can really sit down and talk about everything that’s happened so far, though I doubt I’ll change my mind on wanting all of them.
“Look, Erika,” Reed begins. Startled, I glance over at him. He’s looking back, his face relaxed. “I just want to say...I’m sorry about everything that’s happened so far. I know I start a lot of the fights. Obviously, none of us are exempt from your frustrations, and we shouldn’t be. I just want you to know that we’ll make this up to you.”
I raise a brow. “Is that a promise?”
“You can bet it is.”
“Great.”
“Not that that changes how I feel about you. I still want you for myself.”
“Yeah, well, I want you too. But I also want Hayden and Sven.” Shaking my head, I groan. “I know we haven’t been together long, but we’re all so deep in this mess now, Reed. I didn’t expect Maxen to really be able to handle all three of you. I mean, when I first hired you all, I thought I’d made a mistake, that three might have been too much. But Maxen is a lot trickier than I imagined.”
Reed stays silent as I continue. “If our relationship ended with just some sex, then this wouldn’t be so difficult. But I have feelings for all of you. And on top of that, now I’m pregnant...which I’ll be honest, has happened much sooner than I imagined. It’s, well, bad timing.” I pause to stare out in the woods. “And I’ve realized I need more than just one of you to stay with me after this. I can’t help that, Reed.”
He nods. “You know, back when the three of us saw you hurrying on the other side of the street, I fell in love at first sight.” Rolling his shoulders, he smiles. “I had no idea I would ever see you again, though I knew that if I ever did, I would make you my mate. It’s been my goal. I get so jealous when I see you talking or spending time with the others. My inner dragon roars at me to claim you whenever that happens.”
I gulp, imagining what life would have been like if I had met Reed at some bar or out randomly in public. “I’m sure would have felt that way about any beautiful girl.”
Laughing, he clasps his hands behind his head. “Nope! Sorry, but I’ve been with other girls before. Not many, mind you, but I’ve never felt this strong of a desire towards anyone before. I don’t just want you for sex, either. I want to genuinely love and cherish you. To have my kids…”
I touch my stomach, imagining a life with only Reed as the father of my children. I’m sure he’d be a wonderful father, but it still doesn’t feel right with only him in the picture.
“How many kids did you dream of having?” I ask.
“Probably around five.”
“Five!”
He grins at me. “What’s wrong with five? You probably know that Sven is an only child, but so am I. I want my kids to have a bunch of siblings to pal around with. Even if they get into fights, they’ll still have each other.”
I falter a bit at the idea of popping five babies out of me, but I can’t help but smile at his reasons. “So you really want a big family then?”
“You bet. There’s nothing better than fami
ly.”
“Hayden and Sven are your family too, right?”
Reed is silent for a moment as he stares straight ahead. “They’re my brothers, Erika. I’d die for them. So, yeah.”
“Then, you and your brothers will all share me as your mate.”
Reed chuckles. “So we’ve come full circle then, haven’t we?”
I giggle. “Looks like it.”
We continue to walk on. I’ve become so wrapped up in my thoughts that I’ve barely noticed how far we’ve come. I’m not sure how close the cottage is. My nerves begin to get worked up, but with Reed by my side, I think I'm okay. In fact, I feel like I’ve been groomed to only feel safe when I’m around him or the others.
Stopping in the middle of the road, Reed stops right along with me. “What’s up?”
“Hey, do you mind walking back without me?” I ask. “I just want some space. I want to clear my head and think about things.”
He frowns at me. “Erika, that’s not a good idea.”
Turning to him fully, I do my best to make puppy-dog eyes. “Please, Reed. Just do me this one favor. Maxen won’t show up. Besides, I’ll probably find Sven or Hayden on the way back.”
Reed looks ready to scoop me up and carry me back, but instead, he sighs heavily. “Fine. But if the other guys start yelling at me, I’m definitely expecting you to have my back.”
I nod, smiling. “Yes, yes, now hurry up and go!”
Snorting, Reed grins and turns around to walk back. I continue to walk on, glancing over my shoulder to see when he’s out of sight. When I can’t see him anymore, I stop and sigh. I barely remember a time when I haven’t been surrounded by shifters.
Basking in my newfound freedom, I figure I’ll do a little off-road trekking and step over a giant root.
When I emerge on the other side, I look to my left and see a bulky figure standing just a dozen feet away from me. He’s grinning wildly, crouching, ready to pounce.
