by Clare Flynn
‘Neither have you! That’s my point!’ But she could see no solution. Short of going to Ellis and offering her body to him – and that was unthinkable and anyway probably wouldn’t make any difference. She had to get Bintang to talk to the Hyde-Underwoods. She had to make him stay.
She looked up at his sad brown eyes. ‘Don’t leave me, Bintang,’ she said.
This time he held her gaze. Instinctively, she moved closer. She put her hand against the smooth skin of his cheek and touched his lips with her own.
At first, she felt him hesitate, his hands gripping her arms as though about to push her away, then he began kissing her back, slowly, tentatively. His lips were soft and the kiss was tender. It had come from nowhere and Jasmine surprised even herself. It had never occurred to her to think of Bintang this way, but now it felt right, natural, inevitable. As the kiss intensified, her body was filled with a warm glow and she felt a charge of happiness, despite the conversation they had just had. He couldn’t possibly leave her now. This would make all the difference.
But Bintang broke away first, and abruptly started the engine. Leaving it running he got out, opened the front passenger door and said, ‘You need to get in back now.’
She nodded and did as he said.
As they drove the rest of the way to Bella Vista, Jasmine was certain that everything was going to be all right. He wouldn’t leave now. How could he? Not now he knew she cared for him. They’d talk to Reggie about Ellis. Reggie would make sure the lieutenant could not persecute Bintang. In fact, Ellis would probably be reprimanded for his conduct – including his attempt to kiss her. She shuddered, remembering her disgust at his advances. How different from the welcome warmth of Bintang’s kiss.
Her tears were gone, her spirits rose. Everything would work out somehow. She leaned her arms on the back of the front seat so she could watch Bintang as he drove. His face was a mask of concentration, negotiating the steep climb and the hairpin bends. She had never fully recognised how beautiful he was until now. The straight line of his nose, the sensual curve of his mouth, that lustrous black hair. She reached up a hand and touched the top of his head, letting her fingers run down that dark silk, smoothing down the part that was mussed up. He raised one hand and gently pushed hers away. ‘Stop please, Missee, we almost there.’
She longed to kiss him again but it would have to wait until they could be alone again. Perhaps in the studio. Tomorrow. It couldn’t come fast enough. All her doubts about ever having feelings for any man had vanished in those few stolen moments in the dark interior of this car.
‘I will talk to the tuan about Ellis tonight. At dinner. I’ll tell him what happened. He’ll know what to do.’
Bintang said nothing but nodded. His face was solemn – but then that was one of his most notable characteristics. He rarely smiled. Jasmine’s heart swelled. Was this what love felt like? Did it always creep up on you like that? Unexpectedly. Out of nowhere, changing everything utterly, completely. All Jasmine knew was that in those few moments her entire world had been transformed.
The guard on duty opened the gates to Bella Vista as their vehicle approached. They swung through the gates, drove past the padang and pulled up in front of the bungalow. As she got out of the car Jasmine brushed Bintang’s fingers with her own when he held the door open for her. She remembered the sensation of his mouth on her hers, the soft texture of his lips. A warm tingle spread through her body, banishing her fear. ‘Tomorrow. Come to the studio. We can talk there. Goodnight, Bintang. Everything will be all right.’ She smiled up at him, wanting him to gather her up and hold her. Instead, he looked at her with that same sad expression. Then he nodded and walked away in the direction of his quarters.
* * *
‘You have to do something. Please, Reggie.’ Jasmine said, as she finished recounting what had happened on the shore. ‘The man is a monster. Wait till you see Bintang’s eye. By morning it will be black and blue and swollen.’
‘I’ll ask Jinjiang to go over and clean it up for him,’ said Mary.
Jasmine felt a stab of jealousy. She should have offered to do that herself – regardless of the fact she hadn’t a clue about first aid.
Reggie was frowning. ‘I need to have a think about this. It will require careful handling. Trouble is most of these army wallahs are new in the country. I don’t even know who Ellis’s CO is. But I’ll make some enquiries. Maybe drop into the club and find out if anyone there has any contacts with them and can give me some pointers. Problem is, we should have raised a formal complaint about his appalling conduct when he tried it on with you in the first place, but weeks have gone by. And the military tends to stick together. Band of brothers and all that.’ His mouth formed a hard line. ‘Since the Emergency laws were passed, they have a pretty free rein where law and order are concerned when there’s even a hint of terrorist activity.’
Jasmine was outraged. ‘There was not even the tiniest hint. Bintang was doing exactly what you told him to do. He was keeping an eye on me while I went for a brief walk with Barbara. He did nothing wrong. Nothing.’ She turned to appeal to Mary. ‘Ellis beat him up only because it was Bintang who had pulled him off me. And now Bintang’s sure he’s going to mark him out as being in the min yuen.’
‘That’s ridiculous. He can’t do that.’ Mary looked at Reggie. ‘Can he?’
Reggie had a grim expression. ‘Look,’ he said. ‘Here’s what I think we should do. I’ll call the barracks and ask to speak to the CO and tell him I want to make a complaint about what happened to Bintang. I may need to make it sound as though there was some kind of misunderstanding to avoid them digging their heels in. Let Ellis save some face.’
‘There was no misunderstanding!’ Jasmine was seething with anger. ‘I told the sergeant as well as Ellis that Bintang was our driver and had been minding his own business waiting for me. And Barbara can corroborate that.’
‘I know. But these army types can be tricky. They don’t like to back down. We don’t want to make more trouble for Bintang and certainly not for you either, Jasmine.’ Reggie leaned forward to reach for his pre-dinner stengah, beside him on a side table. Now your exams are over it’s best to stay away from town for a while, until this quietens down. And I’m going to make some enquiries. Makes no sense for that cad to be here in George Town anyway when the commies are on the other side of the Strait. Maybe I can arrange for some strings to be pulled to get the blighter sent off on jungle patrols. The leeches will soon teach him a thing or two. Nasty little man. He’s a cowardly pen-pusher.’
Mary looked at Jasmine. ‘He’s right you know. Better to work things out without making a fuss. Give them room to back down rather than maintain an entrenched position. I know you want Ellis to be punished but we have to find the best way to protect Bintang.’
‘I’ll have a chat with Bintang first thing in the morning and make it clear he has our full support,’ Reggie added.
Jasmine was far from mollified but decided to see what happened next day.
‘You haven’t even told us how the exams went. You must be relieved they’re over. Reggie and I were thinking we could all go and have a slap-up lunch and an afternoon at the Swimming Club to celebrate.’ Mary looked at Jasmine expectantly.
‘Today was hard, but I think I did enough to pass.’ Her voice was flat. She had no interest at all in any of this. She wanted to be away from everyone and alone with only her thoughts of Bintang. Despite the awfulness of the afternoon, those moments of joy in the dark leather interior of the motorcar with him had made her see everything differently and now she couldn’t wait to feel his arms around her again, his mouth on hers.
* * *
Jasmine woke next morning to the clatter of dishes in the kitchen below. She reached for her wristwatch on the bedside table and saw it was nearly nine. She’d overslept.
After quickly washing, she pulled her clothes on and hurried downstairs. Reggie would have been up for hours and must have already talked to Bintang and probab
ly telephoned the barracks. She cursed the tiredness the past week’s exams had brought on her and wished she’d asked Mary to wake her. Last night had been one of those nights where she’d struggled to drift off and then had fallen into the sleep of the dead. Her last thoughts had been of Bintang, replaying their beautiful kiss over and over in her head. Now, in the cold light of day, she also remembered his threat to leave to join the communists. Yesterday, she had been certain he couldn’t possibly leave her – not now he knew her feelings for him. Today, that conviction was less strong. But she told herself not to be silly. Bintang would never be capable of killing people. He would never leave his grandmother. And most of all, in her heart she was sure he wouldn’t leave her.
She hurried into the dining room, where her place setting remained on an otherwise empty table. Realising she was starving hungry, she made her way to the kitchen to find out what was left. Mary and Jinjiang were standing at the table preparing vegetables. Jasmine had been surprised when she first came to Bella Vista at how often Mary assisted the amah in meal preparation. Not behaviour typical of most mems. She’d once asked her about it but Mary had merely said that she used to enjoy helping her mother and there was a lot for Jinjiang to do – something that Jasmine doubted. Bella Vista was unusual in that Jinjiang was the only house servant, when most mems would have had a whole squad of servants at their disposal, never lifting a finger themselves.
The baby was sitting in her high chair, chewing on small slices of raw carrot. Frances gurgled with delight as Jasmine entered the room. But today, Jasmine had no inclination to play with her, merely kissing the top of the little girl’s head.
‘I’m so sorry I overslept.’
‘That’s because you needed to sleep. You’ve had an exhausting week with all those examinations and then with that horrible experience yesterday. Let’s go into the dining room and get some breakfast into you. Jinjiang will bring you some bacon and eggs.’ Ignoring Jasmine’s protests that she didn’t want to interrupt the vegetable chopping, Mary bustled her out of the kitchen.
They sat down at the dining table.
‘Did Bintang say anything to you last night about exactly what happened to him? What they did to him in the barracks?’ Mary asked, frowning.
‘No. Only that they had taken his photograph. He didn’t want to talk about it. He tried to say he’d hurt his eye when he fell over but I told him I knew that wasn’t true.’ Seeing Mary’s frown, she added, ‘Why? Why are you asking me that?’
‘Because he appears to have gone.’
A chill of fear coursed through her body. ‘Gone? What do you mean? Gone where?’
‘I don’t know. Jinjiang treated his bruise last night before we had dinner. No one has seen him since. Reggie looked in his quarters this morning when he didn’t appear as usual at the estate office. His bed hadn’t been slept in and his clothes and belongings, not that he had a lot, were gone.’
Jasmine tasted bile. She gave a choked sob. ‘No! Oh God, no!’
Mary reached across the table and touched Jasmine’s wrist. ‘You’re not telling me everything, are you? Something’s happened, hasn’t it? If you want to help Bintang you need to tell me everything.’
26
Jasmine crumbled. Everything that had happened the day before crowded in on her. The fear over what Ellis might do to Bintang. The shock when he’d told her he intended to join the communists. The sudden unexpected joy of the kiss they had shared. And above all, her overwhelming conviction that she loved him, but that she was the one to blame for what had happened to him.
Mary moved around the table and put an arm round Jasmine’s shoulder. ‘You have to trust me. If you know where Bintang has gone you need to tell me. Do you think he’s been arrested?’
‘No,’ Jasmine wailed. ‘He hasn’t been arrested. Not if his things have gone.’ She swiped the back of her hand across her eyes to brush away the tears.
‘Then why has he left? Where has he gone?’
‘I think he’s gone to the jungle.’
‘The jungle? You mean to his kampong?’
‘No. On the peninsula.’
Comprehension dawned on Mary’s face. ‘Are you saying you think he’s joined the CTs?’
Jasmine nodded mutely
‘But why in heaven’s name would he do that? He’s not even Chinese. As far as we know there are no CTs recruiting here. There’s been no trouble.’ Her face registered anxiety. ‘Reggie’s sure there’s absolutely no hint of unrest at Bella Vista.’
‘Bintang’s family were destroyed by the Japanese.’
‘I know. His sister’s murder was horrible and his mother was taken away from the family. I completely understand why he’d hate the Japanese as a result, but why would that make him want to fight the British?’ She leaned forward. ‘We’ve treated him well here at Bella Vista. Reggie is terribly fond of him. He was only saying the other day he wants to persuade Bintang to take classes in George Town so he can take on more responsibility here. He’s a clever man, wasted as the syce. When the clerk goes back to India next year Reggie wants to give the job to Bintang.’ Her face was puzzled.
‘He doesn’t hate the British because of you and Reggie. I think it’s because of his father.’
‘But isn’t his father dead? I’d understood he died fighting the Japanese.’ Mary tightened her lips, paused a moment, then nodded. ‘I see. You think the father didn’t die but stayed in the jungle? You think he’s with Chin Peng?’
Jasmine nodded. ‘Bintang hates the British. Not you and Reggie, but the British in general. He wants Malaya to be governed by Malays. He doesn’t trust the government.’
Mary frowned. ‘I had no idea. He hid that well. And you think this is why Ellis beat him up? You think Ellis knows he’s in the min yuen?’
‘He’s not in the min yuen.’ Jasmine spoke with force, then added, ‘At least he wasn’t. But he thinks Ellis will say he is. So, he might as well be. Ellis took his photograph. Bintang says he’ll put him on the wanted list. Then they can pick him up off the street or come here and take him away.’ Jasmine started to sob again. ‘But I thought I’d persuaded him to stay. I thought he’d agreed to talk to you and Reggie. I thought you’d be able to sort it all out. I promised him.’ The sobbing engulfed her, making her breathing jerky. ‘Oh, Mary, what am I going to do? It’s all my fault.’
‘It’s not your fault, Jasmine.’ Mary’s voice became harsh. There was an edge to it that Jasmine had never heard before. ‘Get that out of your head, right now. If anyone’s to blame – apart from that nasty Lieutenant Ellis – it’s Reggie and me, for not overruling you and insisting a complaint was lodged immediately about Ellis assaulting you.’
‘But he didn’t get a chance to do anything. Thanks to Bintang. I didn’t want Bintang to get into trouble. But I’ve made it worse. If only I hadn’t agreed to go for a walk with Barbara.’ Her voice was ragged and the tears wouldn’t stop.
Mary got up and took a clean napkin from the sideboard drawer. ‘Here, dry your eyes.’ She smiled at Jasmine. ‘Nothing is ever as bad as it seems. Believe me. We’ll talk to Reggie when he comes in for tiffin.’
But Jasmine was inconsolable.
‘Are you sure you’ve told me everything, my darling?’ Mary sat down again beside the girl.
Another huge gulping sob escaped from Jasmine and she buried her head in Mary’s shoulder. ‘Oh Mary, what am I going to do? I’ll never see him again. I can’t bear it.’
Mary held her as she wept. Eventually, when the sobbing levelled off, she fixed her eyes on Jasmine. Her voice was that of the school teacher, calm, controlled, competent. ‘Now, I think you need to tell me exactly what’s been going on. Are you trying to say there’s something romantic between you and Bintang?’
Wretched, Jasmine looked at her, tears still rolling unchecked down her cheeks. ‘I love him.’
If Mary was shocked or surprised, she did a good job at disguising it. ‘And does he feel the same way about you?’
> More tears. ‘I thought he did. But if he did, how could he leave me? How could he go away and not even say goodbye.’ Her words were coming in breathless gasps.
‘How long has this been going on?’ Mary spoke quietly.
‘It only happened yesterday. After Ellis took him. On the way back here. In the car. I didn’t even know I felt that way about him. But something inside made me kiss him. And then he kissed me back and everything changed. I knew right away I love him. Now all I want is to be with him. Oh, Mary, what am I going to do?’
Mary smoothed a hand over Jasmine’s hair. ‘You poor dear girl.’
‘You’re not angry with me?’
‘Of course not. How could I be angry with you?’
‘Because he’s Malayan. Because he’s one of the servants.’ Then Jasmine remembered something. ‘You won’t tell Mummy about this?’
‘I won’t tell her, but I hope you will.’
‘Do you think she’ll be angry?’
‘Why would she be angry? She will certainly be concerned. Concerned that you are so unhappy.’
Mary stroked the girl’s hair again. ‘You’ll hate me for saying this. But Bintang won’t be the only person you’ll love. Believe me.’
‘Yes he will.’ Jasmine was absolutely certain of that. ‘I know you think I’m too young to fall in love but I never ever believed I’d feel like this about anyone.’ She groaned. ‘I thought I might even be abnormal. That I didn’t like boys. But now, I feel so differently. I really love him. Oh, Mary! Is it always so painful? I don’t think I’ve ever felt so unhappy. And yesterday I had never been as happy as I was when we kissed.’
Mary said nothing for few moments, still holding Jasmine against her. ‘When two people truly love each other they stop feeling alone and lonely. They stop worrying what the other person might think or feel. They become as one. Not as in being the same person – but as thinking always of the other person first. I cared for the two men I was involved with before I met Reggie, but only after I met him did I know beyond doubt that whatever happens Reggie will always be standing beside me.’ She paused. ‘And I think it’s the same for Evie and Arthur.’ We can love other people but if and when you meet the right person, nothing you can do can make each other unhappy.’
