by Claire Raye
“I see you got the ring and a fucking tattoo. How sweet.” Her words are like venom and they sting but I don’t show it. I bite back.
“I can smell your jealousy from here.”
She laughs low and condescending as she shakes her head. She’s trying to make me feel small and weak, but she doesn’t know what she’s up against. Oliver’s words play out in my head: don’t give up.
“That’s what you think this is? Please, I don’t want Lewis. I already have him. He was mine long before he was yours. I know why you married him though.”
“And why’s that?”
Her eyes shoot to my ring, lingering there before she moves her death stare back up to my face. “Cut the shit and stop acting like you aren’t after his money just like the last girl.”
My face falls and any semblance of strength I had fizzles out like a dying sparkler on the fourth of July. She’s winning now and she knows it. She sits up a bit straighter, her eyes brightening at the prospect that she knows more about my husband than I do.
She laughs again. “He didn’t tell you about his ex then, or that he’s filthy fucking rich?”
“No,” I mutter out as I try to pull myself back together. She’s trying to ruin me with his past, get under my skin and make me second-guess my decision to marry him so hastily. But fuck her and her poisonous words.
What happened in Lewis’ past has nothing on our present and I know this, but she’s going to use it against me.
“Do you have any idea who I work for or who I am?” I ask, not letting my thoughts linger on his previous relationship or the fact that she will always have their past to bind them. It will derail this whole thing.
She shakes her head and I can see she’s weakening at my willingness to not give up.
“I work for Noel Robinson and before that I worked for Julia Harris. Names ring a bell?”
I pause letting it sink in, taking a second for her process the gravity of what I’ve just told her. There’s no way these names aren’t conjuring up their images in her head right now. I hate to use them in this way and it’s a rare occurrence when I do. I’m not in this industry to name drop. They get enough of that from the random person they took a picture with who posted it on Twitter and found it retweeted thousands of times.
“Noel’s last movie grossed over a billion dollars internationally. Not a million, a billion. So while I didn’t know Lewis was ‘filthy fucking rich’,” I quote her words back to her, each one of them leaving my mouth loaded with insinuation, “I’m not doing too badly myself.”
She lets out a long slow breath, but doesn’t say anything and that’s perfect because I’m not done yet.
“So the next time you think of me as someone Lewis should put out with the trash, know I make more money in a year than you will see in your lifetime. Unless you’re also sucking at Lewis’ filthy fucking rich teat.”
I shove back from the table, this conversation ending here because it’s clearly going nowhere. With my back to her already, I make my way to the door about to see myself out.
“Wait,” Victoria calls, a small amount of defeat slipping through and into her word.
“What, now you want to have a civil conversation with me? No.”
“I’m sorry,” she calls out this time, but it’s my laugh that slips out, loud and echoing in the space.
“You’re only sorry because of the guilt you feel and I won’t be a party to that. It’s not me you owe an apology to.”
I hear the chair scrape the floor and the padding of Victoria’s bare feet as she walks to where I’m standing by the door. My back is still turned to her and as much I should be the bigger person here, I can’t stop the words that fall from my mouth. My anger seething inside me at how judgmental she was, her assumptions cutting deep.
“And obviously no one ever taught you how crass it is to talk about the amount of money someone has. Have a little respect for him.”
Now it’s my words that spew like venom, biting into her and sinking deep within her skin. And when I know she’s done, not another defensive word leaving her mouth, I add, “Stop trying to protect his heart and open up yours.”
Chapter Eleven
Lewis
I’m woken by Ava’s lips brushing against mine. “Mmmm,” I murmur, smiling as I slide a hand to the back of her neck. “Come here.”
She laughs softly. “You have a visitor,” she whispers, kissing me quickly before pulling back.
“What?” I ask, opening my eyes.
“A visitor,” she repeats, motioning toward the living area. “Come on, get up.”
Confused, I drag myself from the bed, pulling on some sweats and a t-shirt. Smiling at me, Ava takes my hand and leads me out to the living room.
“Hey,” V says as I walk out of the bedroom. Her arms are crossed defensively over her chest as she rocks nervously on her heels.
I turn and look at Ava, wondering what the hell is going on here. She smiles at me as she leans up and presses a kiss to my lips. “I’m going to take Daisy for a walk,” she whispers. “I’ll leave you two to talk.”
“Wait, what…”
She kisses me again but doesn’t say anything more, just nods once at V as she walks past before grabbing Daisy and her lead and walking out of the flat. The soft noise of the front door closing is practically deafening in the quiet of the room.
I turn back to V, who’s watching me, a wary look on her face as though she isn’t entirely sure she should be here. Shoving a hand through my hair, I take a deep breath, trying to get my half awake, half hungover brain to focus and work out what the hell is going on right now.
Exhaling, I scrub a hand down my face before walking past V and into the kitchen. I flick the kettle on and turn, I see V still standing in the middle of the living room, her back to me and her head down.
“Tea?” I ask and she immediately turns, surprised.
“Thanks,” she replies, giving me a quick nod.
I pull out some cups and the tea and milk, stalling a little as I try and work out what I should say to her. A part of me is still so fucking angry. At everything she said to me the other day, at the fact she didn’t turn up last night.
Eventually though, I know I have to say something.
“So,” I say, at the exact same time as she says, “Did you send her to talk to me?”
“What?” I ask, confused.
“Ava,” she says, gesturing to the closed front door. “Did you send her to my place to talk to me?
“No,” I reply, shaking my head. “Why the fuck would I do that? I didn’t even know she’d gone out.”
V lets out a deep breath, nodding slightly as she looks down at her shoes. “Okay,” she says quietly, lifting her head. “I didn’t think…”
“She came to see you?” I ask.
She nods again, the tiniest hint of a smile tugging at her mouth as she says, “Yeah, she did. She was pretty fired up too.”
I chuckle, wishing I could have seen that. “What did she say?”
V’s eyes move around the room, looking anywhere but at me. Eventually, she moves toward the couch before walking over and taking a seat. I make us both a cup of tea and then join her.
“She called me out on some stuff,” V finally says, her eyes staring into the cup of tea she holds. “Said I should apologize to you.”
I don’t say anything and when V finally looks up, I cock an eyebrow at her. “Stuff?”
V exhales, putting the cup on the table before turning to me. “For being jealous,” she says quietly.
“Jealous?” I ask, shocked. “Why the hell would you be jealous?”
V shrugs, but her eyes flick away quickly before returning. “I don’t know,” she says, sadness in her voice. “But she seemed to think I was jealous of you two.”
I shake my head, more confused than ever. While V and I have been friends for most of our lives, short of that one attempt at more in high school, we’ve never been anything else. I think of her as a
sister and the thought of being with her in other ways is kinda…I don’t know, gross.
“Wait,” I say, knowing I need to ask. “Are you…shit…do you like fancy me or…?”
“Jesus, Lewis, no!” she practically shouts. “Fuck, no.”
I exhale relieved. “Okay, so we’re on the same page there, but why would she think you’d be jealous?”
Now it’s V exhaling. “I don’t know, because she’s here. Because you’re married…”
“V,” I say, cutting her off as I sit forward a little. “Ava is my wife and she is the most important thing in my life, I’m not gonna apologize for that,” I say, holding up a hand to stop her from interrupting. “But it doesn’t mean that you and I aren’t still friends. Fuck, V, after everything we’ve been through, you think I’d honestly just ditch you like that?”
V shakes her head, taking a sip of tea before looking back up at me. Her eyes are filled with sadness and something else, as though there’s more she isn’t telling me.
“What?” I ask. “What else happened?”
She bites her bottom lip, putting her cup on the table. “I might have mentioned Joanna,” she says, a pleading look in her eyes as though she’s begging me to understand her intentions. “And how I thought Ava was after your money like she was.”
“What?” I shout, standing.
“Lewis,” she says, reaching a hand out to me.
I shake my head as I start to pace the living room, scrubbing my hand across my unshaven jaw as my mind runs over all the things V could have said, all the crazy shit Ava might be thinking right now.
“What exactly did you say to her?”
V exhales, watching me, her face a mix of emotions as though she knows what she’s about to say next is going to piss me off. Eventually she blurts it all out in a rush. “I told her how Joanna was your ex and a bitch who only cared about your money. And then…then I accused her of being the same.”
“Fucking hell, Victoria,” I say, shoving both hands into my hair and gripping it hard as I turn and face her. “Why the fuck would you even say that?”
She lifts one shoulder in a shrug. “Because I thought it was true.”
I exhale hard. “Even though you know nothing, nothing, about Ava?”
She shakes her head at me. “It just all happened so quickly, Lewis, so…”
“Ava has no idea about the money,” I shout, cutting her off. “No fucking idea, V. And you had no right to tell her about it.”
Her head falls as she nods again. “Yeah she said that too,” she admits. “Told me it was a bitchy thing to do.”
I turn away as a smile tugs at my mouth, not wanting V to see it. As pissed off as I am that this is how Ava has found out about all of this, I gotta hand it to her. I love her even more for putting V in her place about it, especially given the way V has been acting toward her.
“How much did you tell her about Joanna?” I ask, wondering what Ava could possibly be thinking right now.
V looks up at me. “Just what I’ve said to you,” she says. “I didn’t go into the details.”
I nod, grateful. “And the money?”
“Same,” she says, shrugging. “When she called me out on all of it and I tried to apologize, she told me she wasn’t the one who needed an apology,” she continues, standing and walking toward me. “I knew she was right, so after she left, I got dressed and came over.”
She stands in front of me, hands out as if to say, that’s it. She stares up at me, her eyes wide and pleading as though she’s trying to convey something more than the words she’s just told me.
Honestly though, I’m not really sure what to think or feel right now. It pisses me off she’s told Ava things she had no right to tell her. That she lumped Ava in the same category as Joanna before I’d even had a chance to tell her who Joanna was.
“So what now?” she eventually asks, her voice low and tinged with regret.
I let out a long, low breath. “I don’t know,” I tell her. “I’m still fucking pissed about all this, V, seriously.”
“I know.”
“And regardless of what she said, you do owe Ava an apology, a big one.” She nods in acknowledgement. “But,” I say, scrubbing a hand across my jaw again. “I am glad you came over here. Glad you…”
“I was only trying to protect you, Lewis,” she pleads. “That’s all.”
I shake my head at her. “I’m a grown arse man, V,” I tell her. “And regardless of what’s happened in the past, I can take care of myself.”
V stares back at me, her eyes wide as she swallows hard and nods.
By the time Ava walks in the front door, V is long gone. I’m sitting on the couch, head resting on the back as I stare up at the ceiling.
“Hey,” she says, as she lets Daisy off the lead.
I turn my head to her, watch as she smiles at me before moving to feed Daisy. As she walks over to the couch, she tilts her head. “You okay?”
I reach up and take her hand, pulling her down so she’s sitting in my lap. She looks at me, opens her mouth to speak, but I press my mouth to hers and kiss her hard and deep, my fingers sliding into her hair.
“Thank you,” I breathe out, my lips against hers. “I love you so fucking much for that.”
She smiles, her hand brushing against my cheek. “It went well?”
I shrug. “I don’t know,” I answer, still unsure. “But I’m more concerned about you,” I say, searching her eyes.
“Me?”
I nod. “Yeah. The things V told you?” Ava lets out a deep breath, fidgeting a little even as I wrap my arms around her and pull her closer. “Talk to me,” I whisper.
Playing with the drawstring of my sweats, she says, “She told me you had an ex…”
“Joanna.”
She looks up. “Yeah. Said she was…”
“A gold-digging whore I would imagine,” I reply.
A smile tugs at her lips. “Something like that,” she murmurs. “Will you tell me about her?”
I exhale, wishing I didn’t have to but knowing I owe her an explanation. “We dated for about two years,” I say and almost immediately Ava gasps in surprise. “It wasn’t a good two years,” I continue, tucking strands of her hair behind her ear. “We broke up a few times during it.”
“Did she…” she trails off, swallowing hard before continuing. “Did she live here?”
“Fuck no,” I breathe out. “She wanted to, but no, I never wanted that with her.”
Ava nods, but doesn’t say anything, just watches me. I smile, lean in and press a soft kiss to her lips.
“What I had with her, Ava, it pales in comparison to what I have with you,” I murmur, my mouth against hers. “She and I were a train wreck I should’ve jumped off long ago. You,” I pause, running my thumb along her bottom lip. “You are everything to me.”
She closes her eyes, her head falling a little.
“Baby,” I say, tilting her face back to mine. “I love you, only you.”
She nods slightly. “But you must have had feelings for her?”
I shrug, taking a deep breath before continuing. “I don’t know what it was,” I admit. “At first it was, I don’t know, lust I guess, just something that worked at the time. But it never turned into more. It never became anything even close to this,” I add, placing my hand against her heart.
She slides her fingers over mine. “So how did it end?”
I lift her hands to my mouth, kissing her knuckles because I know this part is going to hurt. “She cheated,” I say. “A few times actually,” I add. “I don’t know why I took her back, it was fucking stupid of me,” I continue, exhaling hard. “But the final straw,” I continue, forcing myself to go on. “Was when I came home and she was here. She’d found this,” I add, my thumb brushing over the ring Ava now wears. “She was wearing it, asking me why I hadn’t given it to her yet.”
Ava stares up at me, her blue eyes wide and shining with tears that absolutely fucking break me.
I brush my lips across her cheeks as her fingers curl into a fist in mine, her knuckles white as her head falls onto my shoulder and she buries her face against my neck, not saying a word.
I wrap my arms tighter, pulling her against me as though I can somehow hold her together, even though it feels like I’m the one who’s breaking her apart.
We must fall asleep, because when I next open my eyes, it’s late in the afternoon. We’re lying on the couch, my arms still wrapped around her as she looks down at me.
“Hey,” I whisper, pulling her mouth to mine. “You okay?”
She nods.
“I’m sorry,” I continue, my thumb brushing her cheek as I cup her jaw. “I wish…I, fuck,” I exhale, not knowing what I’m trying to say.
“It’s okay, Lewis,” she whispers. “I know what toxic relationships are like.”
I swallow hard, my chest aching at the thought of someone hurting her. “She means nothing to me,” I tell her. “It was a mistake, a fucked up mess and I…”
“It’s okay,” she says again, giving me a small smile as she slides her hand to my chest, pressing it flat against my heart. “I get it.”
“We can get you another ring?” I say. “I’ll understand if you don’t want…”
“I want this ring,” she says quickly, a finger against my lips to stop me from speaking. “Because it came from you,” she adds. “It’s obviously very special to you and I…”
“You are special to me, Ava,” I say, cutting her off. “More precious than any piece of jewelry or anything.”
“I know,” she says, her smile widening a little.
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you all this before. Sorry you had to find everything out this way.”
She nods, still smiling. “Well, we kinda jumped all in and skipped the getting to know you part.”
I grin now, the ache in my chest fading a little. “Well, we did get to know each other in other really good ways.”
Ava laughs and it is music to my ears as I lean up and kiss her hard.
“I really fucking love you, Ava. I love that you went and saw V for me. I love that you let me tell you all this shit and didn’t judge me for it. And I really love that you are still here, still wearing this,” I add, lifting her left hand to my mouth and kissing her knuckles.
