by Claire Raye
I immediately walk over and turn the lock. When I turn back, Ava is standing in the middle of the room, her arms wrapped around herself, her body trembling.
“Shit,” I murmur, walking over and pulling her into my arms. “Baby,” I whisper, my face buried against her neck. “Are you okay?”
I feel her nod against me, but she says nothing and a part of me can’t help but wonder if I’ve just scared the shit out of her with everything I said, with the way I reacted. Easing her back, I cradle her face in my hands, my heart breaking when I see the tears in her eyes, the anguish that’s written all over her face.
“Oh god, Ava,” I breathe out, leaning down and pressing my forehead against hers. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”
Ava shakes her head, but still says nothing and I can feel my heart beat growing wilder inside my chest.
“Talk to me, baby,” I plead. “Tell me what you’re thinking.”
“I’m…I,” she starts, but then the tears start to fall and I swear my fucking heart breaks in two.
“Jesus christ,” I whisper, pulling her against me. “I scared you, didn’t I? I’m sorry, I’m so fucking sorry.” I wrap my arms around her, holding her against me as I bury my face in her neck again.
I can feel Ava’s fingers digging into my back, her head shaking. “No,” she murmurs, her words muffled by my chest. “No, it’s not…it’s not that.”
I pull back again, stare down at her, my eyes searching her face for some clue as to what she’s talking about.
“I’m sorry,” she says, her tear-filled eyes looking up at me. “I’m sorry all of this is happening to us. I’m sorry I created this mess.”
“Ava, baby, no,” I groan, crashing my lips against hers as all of our frustrations finally spill out. She moans into my mouth, the sound swallowed by our kisses as I pull her back against me, my arms wrapping around her in a hard embrace.
Her body presses against mine, desperate to get closer and mirroring everything I want and need right now. Slipping my hands down to her thighs, I pick her up, Ava’s legs immediately wrapping around my hips.
I walk her back to my office, not bothering to go upstairs, because I don’t want to waste a second more.
“I need you, Ava,” I moan.
She whimpers into my mouth but says nothing more as I prop her up on my desk.
Her hands move to the belt and buckle of my jeans though, making quick work of them as she shoves them down my hips, her actions telling me she needs exactly what I need. My hands tug at her jeans, pulling them and her panties down her legs and throwing them over my shoulder.
Then I step between her legs and bury myself inside her with one hard thrust, both of us letting out a long low groan.
“Yes,” Ava moans, her hands wrapping around my neck and pulling me in for a kiss.
Our mouths crash together again, devouring each other as my hips start to move, pounding against hers.
“Harder,” she moans, her nails digging into me, holding me to her.
I curl my hands around her arse, pulling her closer as I continue to move, Ava’s heels now digging into me and urging me on.
It doesn’t take either of us long, the frustration of everything that’s happened tonight creating a weird energy and sexual tension that only fuels the situation even more.
“Ava, baby,” I groan. “I’m gonna come.”
“Yes,” she moans, biting on my bottom lip as I feel her clench around me, letting go and pulling me right along with her.
I collapse against her, Ava falling back onto the desk and pulling me with her, both of us breathing hard. I can feel her heart, pounding in her chest, right against mine as we both try to catch our breath.
“Are you okay?” I eventually ask, lifting my head.
She looks up at me, her hand brushing my cheek. “Yes, are you?”
I lift myself off her before helping her up, both of us pulling our clothes back on. Taking her hand, I pull her around to my chair, collapsing into it and pulling her into my lap.
“I’m okay,” I say, brushing the hair back from her face, tucking a few lose strands behind her ears.
“Do you want to talk about what happened out there?” she asks, hand gesturing to the still open office door.
I shrug, leaning up to press a soft kiss to her now swollen lips. “Did I scare you?” I ask hesitantly, knowing this is what worries me the most.
“No,” she says, shaking her head.
I let out a long breath. “I’m sorry you had to see that, had to…”
“Lewis,” she whispers, her fingers combing through my hair. “I get it,” she says. “I get why you’re angry and trust me, I feel the same way, I…”
“I want this to stop,” I finally admit, swallowing hard.
Ava freezes, dropping her hand as she stares back at me.
“No, baby,” I immediately say, taking her hand in mine and pressing my lips to her knuckles. “I don’t mean like that.”
“But I created this,” she says, her face filled with sorrow. “I’m the reason this is happening to us.”
“No. No, no, no.” I say. “This is not your fault. If anything, it’s my fucking ex-girlfriend that’s caused half of our problems.”
Ava exhales, her head falling onto my shoulder. “Yeah and my ex-boss who started them.”
I press a kiss to the top of her head. “I do want this to stop,” I repeat. “But I’m not talking about us, about you and me,” I add. “I don’t want this to ruin us, Ava,” I continue, my words quiet. “I can’t let this affect us. Can’t let this be the reason I lose you.”
“You won’t lose me,” she immediately says, lifting her head. “If anything, I’m scared I’m going to lose you.”
I stare into her eyes, my fingers brushing against her cheek, tracing the line of her jaw. “You’ll never lose me,” I whisper, kissing her softly.
“You sure?” she asks. “I’ve had guys bail on me for less before.”
I lean up and brush my lips against her mouth. “Yeah, but I’m not those guys,” I tell her.
“No,” she says, smiling. “You’re not.”
I kiss her again, deeply this time, as I try to show her how much I mean it when I say I’m not walking away from this, from her. Ava lets out a soft moan, as though she hears everything I’m not saying. As though to tell me she feels the same way.
Eventually we pull back. “Now, no more talk of this being your fault,” I tell her. “Because it absolutely is not, okay?”
Ava nods, her eyes searching mine. “Okay,” she eventually replies. “But you know what happened out there is going to be everywhere tomorrow, don’t you?”
I exhale. “Yeah, I know,” I say. “But we’ll get through it,” I add. “Together.”
“I love you, Lewis,” Ava says softly, her hand cupping my cheek.
I smile. “I love you too, baby,” I say, reaching for the bottle of whisky in my desk drawer and pouring a large slug of liquid into the glass on my desk. “Now, let’s see what we can do about this mess.”
I hand her the glass as I open up my laptop, the screen coming to life and illuminating the room. Ava takes a large sip of liquid as I sit forward a little, my arms on either side of her body, and open up my email.
She watches as I type out an email to Jason, telling him about the events of tonight and asking him to add a restraining order and gag order to the list of things I want him to do. I know he’s already working on the defamation stuff, but I need to stop Joanna from doing anymore shit, so the other things need to be a priority. I also want him to see it first thing in the morning, so I mark it urgent and hit send.
Taking the glass from Ava’s hand, I take a large gulp before handing it back to her. Then I open the web browser and type in the address Aiden told me about. Ava watches as the page opens, the images of luxury houses and apartments filling the screen.
“What’s this?” she asks.
I glance up her, see her eyes are still on the screen.
“We need to find somewhere else to live,” I say, kissing her jaw.
Ava looks down at me. “Really?”
I nod. “Yes, really. This place is too small anyway, but I think somewhere more private, more secure would be a good idea too.”
“But,” she says, turning back to the screen. “This won’t…I mean, this will eventually all blow over.”
“I know,” I say, resting my head against her shoulder as I click on the tab listing current properties for sale. “But Joanna will always know where we live.”
We spend an hour or so looking through the properties, flagging a couple we’d both like to look at. Two of them are close to where Aiden and Julia live, and I know this would be an added bonus for Ava, given how few people she knows in London.
When I’ve emailed the agent requesting some times to view the properties, I close the laptop, wrapping my arms around Ava’s waist as I fall back in the chair.
“Let’s go to bed,” I whisper, kissing the side of her neck.
Ava chuckles softly, her hand brushing my thigh. “To sleep or for round two?” she murmurs.
I gently bite her skin, smiling as I growl, “What do you think, sweet girl?”
Chapter Thirty-Four
Ava
The morning is relatively quiet, the only sounds out of the open windows of the second floor flat are the cars passing on the road. Lewis’ lawyers had Joanna served with the restraining order immediately after the incident outside the pub and several of the large tabloids served with cease and desist letters in addition to filing an injunction to have them basically stop stalking us.
Judging by the sounds coming from below, it must be working. There hasn’t been a day since this drama with Noel started where the street outside wasn’t filled with the sounds of laughter and gossiping reporters. The hum of their voices constantly infiltrating the bar and our mornings, and since we’re pretty scheduled people, they know our routine well.
I feel Lewis breathing into my hair, almost a sigh of relief leaving his mouth as we lie in bed, both of us thinking the same thing. It’s been a while since things have been this quiet and even though he would never admit it out loud, business at the pub has been on a slow decline since it’s all gone down.
“Maybe business will pick back up,” I suggest, my words simple but packing a punch we both let linger in our thoughts too long.
“It was never about business, Ava. It was about your safety,” Lewis shoots back, sharpness to his tone.
“I was never really in danger, you know that, right?” I ease over so my body is flush against his, my fingers stroking the warm skin on his back.
I understand his fear, but I also know I never worried that something would happen to me. At times I felt threatened and scared, but thought that things would be taken too far didn’t cross my mind. Noel may be a powerful force, but he’s about using money to get what he wants not brute force.
“Maybe physically you weren’t, but what this does to someone’s mental state can be far worse at times. Think about how you felt leaving the house to walk Daisy? Or about how you were constantly looking behind you to see if you were being followed.” An angry huff of air leaves his mouth with his last word and I know just talking about it in detail brings all his concerns to the forefront.
“I’ve been around this long enough to know that it does affect me, but I also know that I can’t let it consume my life.”
“You’re far stronger than you look,” he teases, pinching my side.
“We’re going to be okay.”
The day is the most uneventful we’ve had in weeks. The bar is busy and I’m still learning all the ins and outs of it, but mainly I’ve got the serving of customers down. It’s a Friday night and the music is playing, people are drinking and the laughter is prevalent, a full night in the bar industry. Something I could definitely get used to. Once the crowd of cameras died down outside, the crowd on the inside grew. The last thing a bunch of drunken people want is to be photographed during their finest hour.
It’s getting late and Lewis glances down at his watch as I wipe down the bar top at the far end. There’s quite the crowd left and I can’t help but wonder how long it will take to clear a place like this out. I remember being in bars with my friends and as a last call was given, we were still lingering, finishing up drinks and laughing, practically being pushed out the door.
“Last call!” Lewis yells out, circling a towel above his head and smiling at the customers. He’s charismatic and beautiful and kind, and these people who drink in his bar have no idea who he really is. He’s always maintained a professional persona with customers and the tattoos and hardass personality make him a little less approachable, but I know what he’s really like and how much all this means to him.
People begin to shuffle out the door or order one last drink, and slowly the people begin to drain their glasses and drain from the bar.
“What a night,” I say to Lewis, sidling up against him as he leans his elbows on the bar. “It was far busier than it has been in weeks.”
“I know what you’re thinking,” he sings, a playfulness in his voice. “And yes, people didn’t want to come to the bar because of the press, but that isn’t your fault. No one likes a lack of privacy. Imagine stumbling out drunk and having a bunch of people watching you and judging you. Fuck no.”
“This is all very true,” I start just as a customer comes up to close out his tab, giving his name and signing his receipt as Lewis hands it to him.
But just when our busy night is starting to wind down, the door to the bar swings open and my heart leaps into my throat when I take in his face.
Noel.
He storms up to the bar, his face filled with fury, burning red hot, his words filled with venom as he spews them from his mouth.
“You signed a fucking NDA, you bitch!” he screams and I have no idea what he’s talking about. While I have been talking to Roger from the Guardian about his story, I haven’t given any details about what it was like to work for Noel. I haven’t violated anything, but that doesn’t seem to matter in his eyes. I’ve walked a fine line and he doesn’t like it.
Lewis moves faster than I’ve ever seen and before I know it, he has hopped over the bar and is standing mere inches from Noel’s face, a finger poking him hard in the chest.
“Get the fuck out,” he says with controlled precision. “You don’t get to come in here and speak to my wife that way and scare my customers.” His demand is solid and his words unwavering, but it does nothing to deter Noel from continuing.
Noel steps closer to Lewis until their chests are practically touching, and all I can hear is the sound of my heartbeat pulsing hard and loud in my ears. Everything is moving in slow motion: Lewis’ hand moves, shoving Noel back, a fist leaving Noel’s side as he attempts to strike Lewis, missing and connecting with the hard, wooden back of a tall bar stool.
“Fuck!” Noel yells out, the bar now completely empty as every customer has run for the hills and all I can think is that once again, my job has fucked Lewis over. No one will want to set foot in here after this and despite the injunction, stories will be written about this night.
Noel is shaking his bloodied hand, the pain on his face now masking his bitter hatred for me and the anger that burns like a wildfire.
“Listen, mate,” Lewis starts, taking another step back placing some distance between him and Noel now. “You don’t want to do this. The attention you’re bringing on yourself is doing nothing for your cause. If anything you’re making it worse. Ava is willing to walk away from all this and you need to be too.”
“Tell your fucking wife to stop working with that reporter,” Noel spits back.
Lewis lets out a deep condescending laugh, ringing out above the din of the music and the crowds on the street that are slowly leaving the surrounding bars.
“You’d think someone like you would know that I don’t control my wife, but I guess when you just manipulate people and use your money
to get what you want…” Lewis trails off, the fury back in Noel’s eyes as they grow wide and his nostrils flare.
“She’s ruining my career!” he screams and while I’m terrified, it’s hard not to want to laugh out loud at his comment. He needs someone to blame so he’s picked me. I’m small and weak in his eyes, he can manipulate me without having to spend hundreds of thousands of dollars to get me to shut up.
But he picked the wrong girl.
“You’re ruining your own career,” I call out, climbing over the bar now too. “I had nothing to do with this. You created a hostile working environment, you harassed people and treated your wife like shit. Take a good hard look at yourself.”
“You’re going to pay for all this!” Noel screams back, but still backing down as he walks toward the door.
“I think you’ve got that wrong!” I scream back. “My guess is you’re going to be paying me.”
“You’ll be hearing from my lawyer,” he adds, his last words echoing in the now silent bar.
When he finally disappears onto the darkened streets, I feel my shoulders sag, because as much as I wanted to stand up for myself, it was exhausting. I had no idea where it would go or how Lewis managed to keep himself from hitting Noel, but our controlled response was what made him leave. But the altercation is what also made customers leave.
“Lewis, I’m so sorry. This is such a disaster and of course he shows up here when you have customers. They all left.” My words come out in a rush, a small choked back sob leaves my lips.
“Don’t start to cry. This is nothing. We’ve had legitimate bar fights in here before. Drunk guys beating each other up, screaming and throwing shit. This, that wanker, he doesn’t matter and if anything, maybe people will tell their stories to the press. Make him look bad.”
I can’t believe how casual Lewis is about everything, but his words make sense. People won’t blame us for Noel’s unhinged behavior. They saw him storm in here and accuse me, calling me names and threatening me. It’s just hard to have your life in such upheaval, to have people you don’t know privy to every detail of your life.
