Unbaked Croakies: A Magical Cozy Mystery with Talking Animals (Enchanting Inquiries Book 1)

by Sam Cheever

  Sebille rolled her eyes, but I wasn’t sure if it was at Alice or me. “We’ll need to do this magically.”

  Oliver scampered down Alice’s arm to her hand, blinking at me as if he was considering pretending I was a tree.

  I shook my head, raising my hands above the table. “Nuh, uh, mister. I’m not a frog person.”

  Alice looked shocked. “Why ever not? Frogs are adorable.”

  I grimaced. I’d had a bad experience with one once. “I’m more of a cat person,” I told her, hoping she didn’t get her feelings hurt, but not caring enough to let her frog crawl all over me.

  Fenwald suddenly jumped to his feet and yowled, his tail slapping the air behind him.

  Sebille surged out of her chair.

  “What’s wr…” I started to ask.

  I never got the words out.

  As Sebille lifted her hands and sent a pale green wall of magic toward the window, something smacked into it from the outside. Something big that sounded like a freight train crashing into the building.

  Fenwald flew away from the window on a yowl, his long legs pushing the air as he was propelled like a furry rocket into the room. Beside me, Alice made an “umph!” sound and fell backward off her chair with the furry projectile tucked against her middle.

  The window bowed inward in a curved bubble that boiled with black energy, the glass making terrifying crackling noises as the oily power shoving it inward roared and pushed.

  Sebille’s face was a study in determination as the energy pressed closer. The window bowed inward until it had to be reaching its breaking point, groaning as the magic tried to expand it past the point the sprite’s magic could contain it.

  But her magic, which smelled of flowers and freshly-broken blades of grass, somehow managed to hold the energy back, bolstering the strained glass as it continued to bulge inward until I thought there was no way it could keep from breaking.

  It didn’t occur to me to hide. I stood there, transfixed by the horror show in front of me. If Sebille’s energy failed and the window exploded inward, I’d be dead. But so would Sebille, and it seemed unfair to run to safety when she was risking herself trying to save us.

  Unfortunately, there was nothing I could do except offer moral support. So I stood there, my hands lifting toward the bulging glass in silent support of her efforts.

  My palms stung and a slim ribbon of pale gray energy slid from each of them, hitting the wall of green energy and mingling with it. It was too little to do much good. But it gave me an idea. I looked down at Alice. “Help her! Use your Keeper energy.”

  The glass crackled ominously. The sulfurous stench of ugly energy filled the room. The horrible smell made my eyes water and my stomach roll with nausea.

  Alice gently pushed Fenwald off her stomach and tucked Oliver into her hair, shoving to her feet. Without another word, she stood between Sebille and me and raised her palms, sending dual ribbons of silvery magic into the pale green barrier keeping the window from shattering into a million tiny pieces.

  The glass groaned, bulging another fraction of an inch inward, and then slowly started to ease backward under our combined efforts.

  The roaring beyond the window started to soften, easing away into the night as the window steadily returned to normal.

  And then the three of us collapsed onto the well-worn carpet and lay there, panting in exhaustion.

  Alice didn’t stay down long. She pushed to her feet and went over to the door, performing a complex spell that sealed Croakies from the magical influence of anyone except a Keeper. Then she slid, gray-faced, to the floor, resting her head against the door’s smooth surface.

  “What in the name of the goddess’s favorite soup crackers was that?” I panted out.

  Sebille’s gaze caught mine, the iridescent green swirling with residual energy. “I don’t know for sure, but I’ll bet I can guess.”

  Alice nodded, reaching inside the pocket of her sweater for her phone. “I can guess too. But Lea should be able to tell us for sure.”

  12

  Fi Fiddle Foe, To Gnomish We Will Go

  Lea gathered up her candles and broke the edge of the circle with her toe. “There’s no doubt in my mind this is the same mage,” she told us.

  The verification was terrifying. Apparently, whoever had invaded Croakies to steal the suitcase wasn’t done with us. “Why do you suppose he attacked?” I asked the three other women.

  Sebille shrugged.

  Lea didn’t respond, apparently thinking my question had been for the others.

  Alice chewed on her bottom lip, her gaze skittering guiltily away.

  “What aren’t you telling us?” I asked, frowning. She could keep her little secrets if they only affected her. But if Lea, Sebille, and I were going to get sucked into a black magic vortex because of something she’d done, Alice owed it to us to come clean.

  The Keeper’s jaw turned mulish, and her small eyes flashed with anger. “Why would you think I’m not telling you something?” she asked angrily.

  “Maybe because you’re looking guiltier than a puppy piddling on a newly mopped floor?” Sebille offered wryly.

  Alice jammed her hands onto her hips and stared us all down for a beat, and then seemed to realize it wasn’t working and sighed. “I didn’t get an order on the suitcase.”

  Sebille and Lea frowned in confusion.

  I thought about her admission for a beat and then realized the significance. “It wasn’t supposed to be here?”

  Alice shook her head. “It showed up in the bookstore a few days ago, and I should have looked into why. But I was…busy.”

  I was starting to realize that Alice was always busy. Unfortunately, it seemed she was rarely busy doing actual Keeper work. “So you just added it to the pile of artifacts to be cataloged,” I said, giving her a hostile stare.

  “I could feel its magic,” she admitted. “But it didn’t seem malevolent. I assumed the Universe had just forgotten to give me an order on it…or that it was a revoked artifact.”

  “Revoked artifact?” Lea asked.

  Woo, was I happy she’d asked instead of me.

  “When an artifact is lost or is being misused, I generally get an order for its retrieval. But sometimes the situation is too dire, or wires get crossed in the system and the Universe just does a special retrieval, dumping it in my lap,” Alice explained.

  My eyes went wide. “Crossed wires? Does that happen very often?”

  Alice chewed her bottom lip. “No. I personally have only had it happen one time. But other Keepers I’ve spoken to have experienced it, so it’s not all that rare.”

  I knew from Alice’s whirlwind instruction on the first day that each dimensional space had its own Keeper of the Artifacts, or KoA. But each dimension only had one. Along with a Universal governing body that ruled from an undetermined central place where they kept watch on all of the dimensional representatives, Keepers answered to a ruling body of Powers that Be, which, in turn, answered to the Universe. Like Keepers, there was only one PTB per dimensional space, and outside of extraordinary circumstances, they weren’t allowed to cross into another PTB’s dimension or interfere with their activities.

  I wasn’t exactly sure how the Société of Dire Magic fit into the hierarchy, except that they seemed to be more of an educational organization than a disciplinary one. Though Alice had told me they’d stepped into a policing role on occasion, when it was deemed necessary.

  “But that still doesn’t explain why the mage is attacking you,” Sebille said, her brows like accusatory slashes above a galaxy of freckles.

  Alice paled. “I might have put a Keeper’s Mark on the suitcase before I stashed it.”

  Lea gasped. “You didn’t!”

  Alice twitched her lips to the side.

  “What’s that?” I asked, a sense of foreboding filling me.

  When Alice didn’t immediately respond, Lea said, “It’s an invisible mark that, once added to an artifact, makes it a
ll but unusable.”

  I thought about that. “So the mage probably took it back to his lair and tried to use it, then realized what you’d done…”

  “And returned to make her remove it,” Sebille finished for me. She frowned. “But my understanding was that it could never be safely removed once placed on a magical object.”

  Alice turned an odd shade of green.

  “So why attack us?” I asked, wondering what the big deal was. “Why does it matter that the suitcase is nil? What could the thing have done that would be important enough to potentially kill three people?”

  “Because artifacts, especially the dangerous ones, are generally geared toward gaining love, wealth, or power. Things people kill for all the time. And because there’s only one way to remove a Keeper’s Mark once it’s placed,” Alice said.

  By the twitchy aspect of her movements and the greenish hue of her homely face, I was pretty sure I knew what that one way was. “You have to die,” I said, my voice catching on the words.

  Alice sighed.

  Lea shook her head. “Killing Alice might disrupt the mark, but it’s not guaranteed. And if it doesn’t work, the last option is negated.”

  “What’s that?” I asked.

  “The Keeper can always open the artifact,” Sebille said, her gaze locked on my face. She seemed to be waiting for me to understand.

  It took me a minute but I finally did. “Ah. Oh! He’ll try to take Alice and force her to open it.”

  “Yes,” Sebille agreed. “And he won’t be content with a one time open. He’ll try to keep her prisoner.”

  Alice’s green color deepened.

  “What happens to the mark if you pass the Keeper position to Naida?” Lea asked Alice.

  “I’m not sure. As far as I know, it’s never been tested.”

  All the blood ran out of my face until I no doubt matched Alice. “You mean this guy’s going to try to kill or kidnap me too?”

  Nobody looked at me. Trying to catch their gazes was like trying to capture a lightning bug with a floppy hat.

  I narrowed my gaze on Sebille. “What do you know about this?” I asked the sprite.

  “Not much. My people haven’t had any experience with a Keeper’s Mark that I’m aware of. But I can ask my mother.” She looked at Alice and the Keeper nodded.

  “Thanks,” she said, looking sincerely grateful. “Maybe she’ll know of a way to break it.” Alice didn’t need to add the unspoken thought, “without anyone having to die.”

  “We can try Madeline Quilleran,” Lea said, dread clear in her voice.

  Alice flinched as if struck. “I’d rather not if we can avoid it.”

  “Who’s that?” I asked.

  “One of the most powerful witches in the country,” Lea said, frowning. “She’s a little scary.”

  “Why is she scary?”

  “In general, the Quillerans are not what anybody would consider light witches. They dabble in blood magic and tend toward the black side of the magic arts,” Lea explained.

  “Madeline’s not a black witch,” Alice said, sounding defensive.

  Lea just shook her head.

  “Have you worked with her?” I asked Alice.

  “Yes. She actually created an impenetrable security system for Croakies. It’s completely Keeper initiated and controlled.”

  Lea nodded. “She’s got a reputation for helping the magic community on occasion. But it always has to be on her terms.”

  “Back to the current problem,” Sebille said. “How are we going to find this mage so we can stop him?”

  Alice rubbed her arms. “I…um…might have an idea where the suitcase is. I’m assuming if we find that, we’ll find him.”

  “Good,” I said. I’d ask her later how she knew where it was. I was assuming it had something to do with the mark she’d put on it. “Where is it?”

  “It’s um…” She twitched for a moment, her gaze sliding around the room, and then hugged herself as if she were cold. “It’s at Gnomish.”

  “Well,” I said, sucking down the fact that I wasn’t going to be getting sleep any time soon. “I guess we’re going to Gnomish then.”

  Other than the two-story-high red, yellow, and white garden gnome gracing the grassy center of the circular drive in front of the gray brick building, Gnomish, Inc. looked just like any other professional business.

  The parking lot to the side of the building was empty.

  “Nobody here. Maybe they don’t have a security guard,” I said, frowning.

  “Maybe,” Sebille agreed. “If there is, I’ll deal with him.”

  Her “take no prisoners” attitude had me a little concerned. “What exactly does that mean?” I asked. I was all for helping Alice with her problem…especially since it was probably going to become my problem if it wasn’t solved…but I had no intention of going to prison for committing gnomicide, thank you very much.

  Sebille’s silent shrug did not make me feel better.

  No, it did not.

  Alice parked her frumpy white sedan in the shadows near the building and we climbed out. “How are we getting inside?” I asked.

  Alice looked at Sebille. The sprite expelled an irritated sigh and rolled her eyes. No small feat when performed simultaneously. A beat later, she’d popped into dragonfly size and buzzed toward the building. We listened to her buzzing along the face of the building for several minutes before a tinny whisper sifted down to us. “I’ve found an open window. I’ll get the lay of the land and let you in.”

  Alice took a deep breath as if she’d been holding it.

  The two of us stood there for a minute, the silence stretched taut between us.

  As usual, I was the one to break it. “We’ll figure this out,” I told the Keeper.

  Alice glanced my way, her expression unreadable in the dim light. But she bobbed her head in agreement and surprised me by giving my hand a squeeze. “Thanks for helping me with this.”

  I smiled to show her it was okay, then realized she probably couldn’t see it. “It’s fine. I’m glad I can help in some way.” Though I had no idea how I could help. I was really just along for moral support. Or, remembering the giant hot fudge brownie sundae I’d scarfed before coming to Gnomish, for ballast.

  “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about the suitcase.”

  So was I. But if I was honest with myself, I wouldn’t have been able to do anything about it anyway.

  We stood in silence for a few moments, an icy wind scouring the flat ground of the business park just outside of Enchanted. Almost simultaneously, Alice and I pulled our coats closer and turned away from it. The brittle air had the smell of snow in it and I found myself anticipating the change. I’d always loved snow. Even though I’d never been a fan of cold weather.

  The lock turned on the front door and it swung open.

  Sebille’s bony frame was backlit by the soft lighting of the lobby. “Come on!” she urged impatiently.

  We hurried into the building and she locked it behind us. “I haven’t seen a guard,” she whispered. Then she looked at Alice. “Where do you want to start?”

  Alice glanced around, outwardly calm.

  I was only half paying attention because the place was already creeping me out. The walls were lined with statues of garden gnomes, their dark eyes blank and dead. Their smiles looked evil in the low light. “Creepy,” I told my companions.

  Sebille barely spared them a glance. “We should hurry.”

  Alice nodded, pointing to the center of the lobby, which was open to the second and third levels.

  I took a step in that direction and there was a soft whoosh of air, followed by a quick flash of scarlet light.

  We stilled, waiting.

  Nothing else happened.

  I looked at Alice.

  “It was probably an alarm spell,” she told me as if it was nothing. “Someone will come soon. We need to hurry.”

  I felt every drop of blood fleeing from my face, sprinting do
wn my veins into my heart and lungs, where it started a riot that made everything in my chest clench and roar.

  Every instinct I owned was screaming at me to get out of that building.

  Telling me to run.

  Run fast.

  But Sebille and Alice started forward and, not knowing what else to do, I followed them.

  The open area on the main floor contained a raised octagonal greenspace with an enormous tree in its center. The tree’s lush-leaved branches reached high and wide into the open space.

  Around the tree was an assortment of flowering plants, the leaves shiny and dense, and the blooms vivid against their vibrant green hues. My gaze scanning the darkness high above our heads, I got a sense of banister-lined walkways in the dim lighting. My imagination conjured a series of doors forming the backside of the hovering walkways. The Gnomish, Inc. offices.

  “I’ll send out my Keeper energy from here,” Alice explained to me. “So it can travel through the whole building.”

  I bit back an urge to tell her to get to it. The back of my neck was prickling uneasily. I couldn’t help feeling like somebody was watching us.

  Probably those stupid, mean-eyed statues.

  Alice lifted her hands and dipped her head back, her eyes glowing with silver light. Matching silver energy shimmered into existence above her outstretched palms and sifted into the dark above our heads.

  Her glowing eyes had me taking a step back. Did I look like that when I sent out my fledgling magics? Nah, I decided. I didn’t have enough magic inside me to even make my eyes sparkle, let alone glow.

  Sebille and I watched as dual ribbons of silvery energy wound upward from her hands, into the open space above our heads.

  We stood in silence for a moment, waiting. A beat later, a distant chime sounded. It appeared to have come from the top floor. Alice hurried toward the staircase that led to the dim levels above, and we started up.

  By the time we stepped off the stairs into the hallway on level three, I was panting like a puppy in August and my heart was pounding. It felt like I was going to have a heart attack.