by V. Vaughn
My lion makes me bang my head playfully against Tristan again, wanting him to fall and wrestle with us. But he doesn’t fall or join in the fun. My lion snorts to taunt him, and I admonish her in my head, but she doesn’t care. She’s not listening to me at all.
Play! she cries out. No! I yell back. We struggle with who’s going to have control, and when I force her to crouch back onto the ground, I think I can win. I concentrate hard on my human body, picturing it, and I see the way I dressed for my date this morning which brings a surge of happiness. I bring up the scent of the light perfume I put on and the way my hair felt silky smooth in my hands when I made my ponytail. I want to go back. I want to be Lexi again, especially since my lion scares me a little.
“Try, honey,” Tristan says. “Imagine yourself physically changing.”
I close my metaphorical eyes and concentrate on what I remember of my shift. I picture my skin swallowing up fur and my claws retracting to become fingers. My brain hurts I’m trying so hard, and suddenly it happens, like I managed to flip the switch. My fur and teeth and whiskers recede into my body and give way for my nose that I’ve always thought turned up like a ski-jump and my pouty mouth that I used to think made me look sad only to realize as an adult it’s something men find sexy. And my hair. My long, dark hair returns, and I think about how I can put it in a ponytail again.
I let out a sigh and open my eyes. I’m Lexi again, and even though I’m lying on the ground, naked and shivering from my ordeal, I’m so relieved to be human again tears of joy come to my eyes.
Tristan gathers me in his arms, and I bury my face in his chest. I don’t want to cry, but my joy makes way for the fear I felt. I was afraid I’d never get to be human again, and hot moisture spills out of my eyes to roll down my cheeks.
I pull back to gaze at Tristan through my wavering veil of water. “I don’t want to be a lion again.” A sob escapes, and Tristan pulls me back in to hold me tight. He nuzzles his face into my hair as I revel in how safe he makes me feel, as if this is normal behavior and not me being a child. My god, I don’t know how I deserve this man.
Tristan says, “It just takes practice, baby. I promise it will get better.”
I need to get my act together and deal like and adult, so I force my tears to stop and pull back to sniff. I say, “I couldn’t control my lion. I was watching the squirrels and thought about playing with them, and then my lion took over. She wanted to eat them and made me shift so she could.” The fear of losing control comes back to me, and I take a shaky breath to keep my tears at bay. “I couldn’t stop her.”
Tristan runs a hand over my head to soothe me as compassion fills his eyes. “This is normal, babe. It takes time to learn to shift in the first place. It makes sense it would be hard for you without the memories.” I frown at him, not sure if he’s only trying to make me feel better. He smiles. “Don’t give me that you’re-full-of-shit look”.
I gasp. “I’m not!” But my flushed cheeks let him know I most certainly was. He knows me well even if I don’t know myself.
He says, “I remember when I first started shifting at sixteen, I had a hell of a time controlling it.” He chuckles. “I once shifted in the middle of a movie theatre on my first date with this cute little redhead.”
My lion’s ears perk up, and she lets out a warning growl.
Tristan holds up his hand, “Easy there, it was a first and only date. She wasn’t impressed with the way I tore up the place, and I worked a lot of Saturdays and Sundays sweeping up popcorn and prying gum from under the seats to pay for that damage.”
I give him a wry smile for trying to make me laugh, but I say, “I still don’t want to be a shifter anymore. I’m terrible at it. Can’t I just remain human?”
He kisses the side of my head. “Oh baby, I’m sorry. No. You’re a shifter for life. It’s part of who you are, and I swear you’re going to fall in love with your lion again once you learn to how to control her.”
I shake my head because I’m not so sure. I hear myself whine like a child. “It’s too hard, and I don’t want to.” The truth is, it’s the one thing I don’t want to remember about my life.
Tristan gently holds my face and peppers my cheeks with tiny kisses as if he can chip away at my fear with each one. He stops and looks intently into my eyes. “It is really hard at first, Lexi. For everyone. But you don’t have a choice. The alternative is that your lion will take control, and I know you don’t want that.”
I recall how it felt when I was chasing the squirrel and could only go along for the ride as my lion held the reins. I know he’s right. “No. I don’t.”
“You learned to control your lion before, and you can do it again,” he says. “I know you can.”
I find it hard to believe I was ever in control of the beast. She’s so wild, carefree, so extremely untamed. She manages to make her thoughts and feelings suffocate any ounce of humanity I possess, and I shake my head as I try to fathom what it’s going to take to dominate such a powerful being.
Tristan says, “I’ll help you learn to shift back and forth until you’re able to control it. I’ll be right by your side, holding your hand if you want, although I don’t think your lion will let me hold her paw.” He smiles.
I know he’s trying to lighten the mood, but I find it hard to see the humor in what’s going on. Maybe one day I’ll be able to laugh about it, but right now I can’t. All I want to do is cry. But I do realize I don’t have any options. “Fine.” I say.
He kisses me softly on the lips. “I’m here, babe. I’m not going anywhere. I’ll help you through this.”
I nod, still unsure if I will ever be able to accept my identity, but with Tristan’s help I believe I have a chance to at least control it. Now tears come to my eyes for a different reason. I’ve been nothing but trouble for this man, and it has to be such a burden. “Why—" my voice cracks and I clear my throat to try again. “You’re too good to me, Tristan. Thank you for sticking with me through all of this.”
“Oh, Lexi.” He pulls me into his arms. “You’d do the same for me. I’m sure of it.”
As much as I don’t want to, Tristan insists that we should work on shifting now while the memories of how I managed to shift back to human form are fresh in my mind. After multiple tries, it does get easier. Sort of. And I’m grateful when he decides it’s time to stop.
As we walk back to the cabin, he holds my hand. Both of us are slick with sweat making dirt stick to our skin, and I imagine we look like we just wrestled in the mud. I’m not sure how I’ve got the energy, but the thought of naked wrestling with Tristan makes my insides quiver with desire. I throw out a bone to see if he can be tempted. “We should probably take a hot shower.” I lean my head against his strong arm and gaze up with puppy dog eyes. “Together.”
His face breaks into a grin. “I like how you think.”
Energy I had no idea existed in me surges forward, and I let go of his hand to run. I call out over my shoulder, “Catch me if you can!” and I race to the shower as if I’m being chased by a—I nearly have to stop running because of laughter when what comes to me is a tiger.
Chapter 26
TRISTAN
My god, I breath out a prayer of thanks to the powers that be as I chase a naked Lexi into the house. How could I not be in love this woman? She just had a hell of an exhausting experience, doing things she couldn’t control and then taking on the hard task of learning to manage her shift. She should be completely wiped out. Yet she just took off in a sprint after taunting me with the promise of sex, whether I catch her or not.
I’m not one to question such a thing too hard, though, and when we get to the bathroom and Lexi turns on the shower, I step inside the steamy heat along with her. She gets under the spray first, and I watch as the filth that clings to her sweaty skin runs off in tiny rivers. One makes a path over an erect nipple, and I lean in to tease the dusky little bud, knowing it will send shock waves of pleasure through Lexi.
She
grabs my head and arches her chest against me as she moans without any hesitation. She’s so responsive to me, and it’s the sexiest thing. I make my way down her stomach, willing to endure the hard tile on my knees, but she twists in my light grip to place her hands on the wall and stick her bottom out. I can’t help but recall the latest sexual adventures we’d been playing with before her accident. My dick throbs with the memory.
Lexi’s always been open to trying anything, often bringing up the ideas herself. Anal was something I was hesitant to approach even though it had been a long-time fantasy. I imagined it had to be painful for a woman, but she insisted. Considering she likes ass play, I should have known she’d be game. And once we figured out a way to make us both enjoy it, it became a naughty pleasure I think we both found titillating because of the taboo of it as well as the sensations.
I slide my finger down her ass crack and she says, “Yes,” when I get to her anus. I move in to wrap my other arm around the front of her to find her clit too. As I dip my finger into her ass, I rub her clit, and she rocks her hips back and forth trying to work both sets of sensitive nerve bundles equally. I think she wants me to fuck her ass, but I want to make sure and say, “Talk to me, babe. Tell me what you want.”
“I want it all. Finger bang both holes.”
Fucking hell. Her words make my balls ache, and I want to ram into her hard, but it’s important this is good for my mate as well, and I slide a digit into her pussy as I slowly work on widening her anus to take more. Her mewls let me know my movements feel good, and she relaxes enough that I switch to working her ass with my thumb. I move it in deeper to open up another ring of tightness.
A groan escapes me as she lets me in deeper, and I pump two fingers into her pussy, making sure to apply pressure to her g-spot. Water runs down her back as I work, and I lean in to lap some up.
She’s like putty in my hands as she writhes with her pleasure. “Tristan,” She lets out a loud moan that echoes off the shower walls. “Put your cock in my ass.”
“Baby—” I’m hesitant because, not to brag, but my dick is much thicker than my thumb.
She’s just as adamant as she was before she lost her memory, and she cries out. “Fuck me!”
I roll my thumb around the edges of her anus to widen it more before I move to enter her. Apparently I’m going too slowly, because Lexi pulls my hand from her pussy. “Grab my hips and do it,” she orders.
I give my woman what she wants and push in, careful to let her tiny channel accept me, and holy shit, she practically sucks me in. I let out a cry as my eyes roll back in my head with the force of her sphincter muscles squeezing me. “Je-sus,” I pant out.
“Yes,” she says before she moans and thrusts her ass harder into my groin. “Take it, babe.”
I retreat slowly, and she moves a hand to her pussy. When I move back into her, I feel pressure along the side of my shaft as she presses against the thin wall separating her two channels. “Feel good?” she asks.
I let out a groan in reply, unable to form any words. It might be because all my blood has rushed to my cock and balls as the pressure of my orgasm builds.
She chuckles. “That’s what I like to hear. The next words out of your mouth better be my name followed by ‘fuck.’”
I’d laugh, but every time a dirty word comes from my sweet Lexi’s mouth, I manage to get harder, and I move faster now as my primal urge for release takes over.
White-hot ecstasy fills me as the smacks of my balls slapping against Lexi’s ass cheeks, water splashing on our skin, and our mutual moans reverberate in the shower stall. The pressure builds at the base of my shaft, making me want to sink deeper before I come. I push completely inside Lexi and tense up before my essence shoots out. I hold on for a moment with the hope I can make it last, but it’s no use. “Lexi. Fuck!” I cry out as hot cum explodes from my cock.
My knees are weak as I flex my groin to get every last drop out of me, and then I slump over my mate and wrap my arms around her torso to hold on as long as I can.
Water splashes over my back as I recover, and a smile covers my face. My woman is so perfect. She’s a sweetheart the town loves, but when it comes to sex, she’s got a dirty side nobody would ever expect. And nobody is ever going to know our secret, which makes it even more delicious.
I want to tell Lexi how much I love her, but I’m afraid it might freak her out, so I decide to show her instead. My shower stall is oversized, and when Lexi first started to stay over, I built her a bench to hold all her toiletries as well as to allow her a place to put her foot up so she could shave her legs. I release her and move the bench underneath the shower head so she can sit and have water splash down on her head or lean back against the wall to have it hit her chest.
Lexi’s hair is stuck to her face in soaked strands, and I smile at her as she moves it out of the way while she watches me. “Sit,” I instruct. “Lean back and enjoy yourself, babe. Like I just did.”
I get on my knees as she lowers herself and leans back against the tile wall, and she opens her legs for me. Her red folds are slippery with more than water, and her scent travels up my nostrils as I move in to taste her sweet yet pungent nectar. Considering her need to feel, I’m not gentle. I thrust my tongue inside her slickness first but quickly follow up with two fingers as I move to suck on her clit. And I add a light scrape of my teeth for a bit of sharp pain that makes her gasp and twitch.
Lexi grabs her breasts and fondles them as water splashes down on her chest. I picture her tweaking her taut nipples as I eat her out and stroke her g-spot. As she begins to quake with her orgasm, I snicker to myself. I’m not letting her off easy, and even when she has come down and pushes at my head to stop, I don’t. I know her entire pussy is throbbing with acute sensitivity, and that means another climax isn’t far away.
“Tristan, I—” She moans loudly and stops pushing to clutch at my head instead in sweet surrender. “Oh, god.”
I move my head back to gaze up at her and tease, “The next word out of your mouth better be ‘Tristan’, followed by ‘fuck.’”
She smiles as she nods and then whimpers as her eyelids flutter with a sexy, glazed-over look of desire. And I dive in to complete my mission. I may not be able to tell her I love her just yet, but everything about the way I give her pleasure tells her all I need to say.
Chapter 27
LEXI
Once Tristan blew my mind multiple times—and let me mention that I’m so doing anal again if that’s what I get in return—I could barely move. But I didn’t have to. He bathed me and now I’m sitting on the bed, his bed, wrapped in a fluffy white towel as he combs through my hair. I ask, “Have you always taken such good care of me?”
“Um-hum, and you’ve always been able to surprise me too.”
I surprised myself as well. I have no idea where the urge to do anal came from. But it was amazing. Perhaps it was my daredevil lion pushing the envelope. I don’t know but—my heart stops for a second as I wonder if that was our first time and if I shocked Tristan with my request. I glance over my shoulder at him. “Oh god, was I too—”
“Fucking amazing?”
My cheeks heat up at his use of the f word, although I have no idea why because I sure said it enough a few minutes ago. “What I meant was. Well—was that the first time we’ve done that?”
“No. I swear to god we’ve done it before, and you were the one who asked for it to happen.”
My cheeks burn with embarrassment, but my lion purrs in my head because she’s proud I was so daring in the bedroom. Yup. My lion is definitely responsible for that side of me coming out.
Tristan has finished with my hair, and the comb clatters on the bedside table before he asks, “Hungry?”
“Starving. I never did get that squirrel.”
He chuckles. “Not to worry. I’ve got roast beef. I’ll make us sandwiches.”
I go to my room to get clothes to wear while Tristan gets dressed and makes us a meal. I sit at the tab
le and smile when he sets down a platter of six sandwiches stuffed with mounds of juicy-red roast beef. We eat without talking until both our stomachs are satisfied.
As I lick my fingers to get every last drop of beef juice, Tristan says, “I’m sorry you spontaneously shifted today and didn’t know what to do. I wish I’d been there.”
“I know, and it’s not your fault. I didn’t think. I shouldn’t have gone on the walk without you.” I shake my head as I recall how out of control I felt. “I don’t know how I’ll ever manage my lion, let alone enjoy that side of myself like you do. You seem to revel in your tiger.”
Tristan reaches a hand out to me, and I take it. “There are benefits to being a shifter, you know?”
I shrug as I try to find one reason my lion is a good thing. I can’t. “I don’t know what could be beneficial about being a thousand-pound monster.”
“We aren’t monsters, Lexi.” Tristan frowns, and I’m afraid I’ve insulted him. “Far from it.” He squeezes my fingers and smiles to let me know he’s teasing. “Your lion is definitely not a thousand pounds. Four hundred at most.”
I offer him a wry smile, but I’m not in the mood to laugh.
Tristan tries a different approach. “You’ll always be safe because you can always shift into a lion to defend yourself. And you can eat whatever you want because your metabolism is crazy fast.” He glances back at the kitchen. “Want to finish off those chocolate chip cookies? You’ve certainly burned off the calories today.”
I smile because food definitely motivates me.
He speaks seriously now. “We’re part of a greater community of shifters who live in harmony. We take care of each other like a big family, something that doesn’t come as easily in a community of humans. We shifters, well, we always have each other’s backs.”
