Enough was enough. It was time to accept that whatever I thought I’d felt with Adele was some sort of illusion. That was better than the truth which was just I’d felt something and she hadn’t. My track record for being left for other men was starting to wound my ego.
We had a nice dinner. Foster was great at that sort of thing and afterward we took our drinks to his living room. He and Lauren snuggled together on the sofa, his hand absently running through her long strawberry blonde hair.
For a guy worried about his girl being too serious, he looked pretty satisfied.
“Do you want another drink?” Olivia asked. She glanced at Foster and Lauren and then to the empty kitchen.
“Obnoxious, aren’t they?”
“A little.” She stood and I followed suit, walking a step behind her to the kitchen. It wasn’t that far away, but the setup made it feel like a separate space. Not that Foster and Lauren would notice. They were totally oblivious to us at the moment.
I fixed her another vodka with soda and grabbed myself another beer but didn’t move to go back to the living room just yet. The whole thing was a weird out-of-body experience. Going through the motions, body present but mind and heart totally checked out. I was lost in thoughts of Adele, replaying everything Chance had said about her, and letting my mind run wild with possibilities.
“If I didn’t know better, I’d think you’re jealous — the way you’re looking at them. Is it her or him?”
I realized she was right. I was staring. Not at the free show, but at how easy it seemed between them. I glanced at Olivia. Could it be that easy with her?
Was it even supposed to be easy? Sure, Foster looked like a man head over heels in love, but I knew better. Maybe easy went hand in hand with inconsequential.
“Neither. Maybe just a little envious of being in a couple.”
“You’re a relationship guy?” she asked. I liked that she didn’t have my entire relationship history memorized. Nothing worse than meeting a girl and having her think she knows you based on what she’s read online.
“You say that like it surprises you.”
“I guess it does.” She rested her hip on the counter. “When was your last relationship?”
“Not long ago.”
“Ah.” She nodded slowly.
“Ah? Did I just give away something with that response?”
“Well it hopefully explains why we’ve been out together twice now, but you haven’t asked me anything about myself.”
“Shit, I’m sorry.” I winced.
She laughed. “It’s okay. I get it. I was the same way after my last relationship.”
“A self-absorbed arsehole?”
Another light chuckle left her lips. “Something like that.”
“Somehow I doubt that.”
Talking was easier after that. I made a point to actually get to know her and surprisingly we had a lot in common. We were both cat owners, we’d both moved to LA in the past five years, we were both only children, we even had the same birthday month – July.
We’d moved back to the living room. Olivia sat beside me on the love seat and I rested my arm behind her. We’d fallen into a sort of comfortable presence. Foster and Lauren weren’t much help in keeping the conversation flowing. Foster tried, but his girl wasn’t having it. I don’t know if she was just so into my buddy that she couldn’t see past him or if she had the self-awareness of a toddler, but all she could focus on was Foster.
Lauren had just asked if we’d ever been to Napa – she’d just gone on a girl’s trip – and before me or Olivia could answer, she’d commandeered the discussion to invite Foster on a weekend getaway.
By unspoken agreement, we stopped trying to include them in conversation after that.
“I have a confession to make,” Olivia said, legs turned toward me. She ran her finger along the rim of her drink. “I knew when your last relationship was. I’m not some crazy stalker or anything, but when I told my mom we were going out, she dug around a bit.”
I nodded, unsure what to say.
“I’m sorry to bring it up, I just wanted you to know I get it. I understand why you’re gun shy. I’ve never been left at the altar, but I have been cheated on. It took me a long time to trust again after that. It was two years ago, and I still think it trips me up sometimes.”
I really didn’t know what to say to that. I went for deflection and learning more about her.
“Have you dated much since?”
“On and off. At first people told me I needed to get back out there. They set me up with brothers and friends. Then I tried online dating, but that was mostly just casual hookups.” She stopped talking and looked up with concerned eyes. “Oh God – was that an over-share?”
I chuckled. “No, I appreciate the honesty. No judgment here. I think I probably would have fallen into the casual hookup scene too if it weren’t for—” An image of Adele flashed before me. Hands crossed at her waist and eyes fire. God, she’d been so sexy and strong – so exactly what I’d needed. “A friend looked out for me.”
“That’s good that you had someone to do that for you. Most of my friends laid low for a while. They called and tried to say and do the right things, but I was pretty unpleasant to be around.”
She was right. It’d been the same for me. If it hadn’t been for Adele, I’d probably still be drinking myself into a stupor. She’d looked out for me when I needed it. I had a feeling she did that for people a lot.
Who did it for her?
I stood, totally unsure of just about everything except one single thing. I needed to be that person for Adele. The person that looked out for her even when she maybe didn’t realize she needed it. New York was all wrong for her. I felt that down to my core, and if there was even a slight chance that she was as miserable as I was, I needed to help her.
“I’m so sorry, but I need to be somewhere.”
I’d go to New York and I’d… fuck, I didn’t know. Call her? If I saw with my own eyes that she was happy, and she had everything she ever wanted in New York then I would move on. I just needed to be sure she was okay first.
I gave a shit apology to Foster and Lauren, thanked Olivia, made excuses, and got the hell out of there. It was all hurried and chaotic and probably a little nuts, but I was afraid if I waited even another day, I’d talk myself out of it.
Being a pussy was a far saner option.
I took off toward Chance’s place. I couldn’t see Adele until I’d come clean with him. I hated the idea of telling Adele’s secrets, but I needed his nod of approval. If he thought she was better off with Richard and in New York then I’d turn around and go back home.
Chance and Aubrey had moved into a new house shortly after Adele left, but I found the place without any trouble. CJ was already in bed, so Chance and I went out on the back porch.
He was quiet as I told him a rough version of events, how I’d fallen for her while I’d been living with her those two weeks, how I’d been unable to stop thinking about her since.
“There’s one more thing,” I told him, running a hand over my jaw, wondering if he was going to break it when I finished. “I kissed her.”
“You and my sister?” His dark brows raised. “You kissed Adele?”
“She stopped it straight away. It was all me.”
“And that was it?”
“She left for New York an hour later and the next time I saw her she was getting engaged.”
Aubrey joined us outside, sliding into a chair next to Chance and holding a mug in both hands. “You haven’t talked to her at all since she left?”
Chance and I gave her a confused look.
“What, I was standing at the door eavesdropping, okay?”
“I’ve been emailing her, but she hasn’t responded.”
They were quiet as I finally took a breath and wiped my sweaty palms on my jeans.
Chance and Aubrey shared some sort of non-verbal look that must have said a million things because suddenly
Chance’s eyes widened and then he looked to me. “Oh fuck, you’re not here just to come clean, are you? You really like her.” He shook his head and muttered something under his breath. Aubrey placed her hand over his and he shook his head. “You’re sweating and you look like you’re going to toss your cookies. You’re nervous, which means you’re worried what I’m going to say. If I’m going to give you my blessing or not. Because I know you won’t go after her without it.”
He was right. Of course, he was right. I wish he weren’t. I wanted to chase after her with reckless abandon. Screw the consequences.
“Yeah, mate, I really like her. She’s beautiful and considerate and stubborn. Loyal… she’s just good. And I know I didn’t spend that much time with her, but I just feel it… deep down. We belong together.”
Aubrey smiled big, but Chance wasn’t so easily won over with my proclamation.
He crossed both arms over his chest. “Tell me this, if you and Adele were flying somewhere together and you got upgraded to first class and she didn’t, what would you do?”
“I don’t understand how that’s relevant.”
“Just humor me.”
“I’d upgrade her as well so we could sit together.”
“What if that wasn’t an option. Only one seat in first class. Would you take the upgrade or rough it with her in economy?”
“I don’t know.”
“No wrong answer. It’s just a hypothetical what-if.”
I ran a hand through my hair. God, I hated economy seats. My legs were too long, and someone always recognized me and then stared at me or snapped sleeping, mouth hanging open, pics of me. “I’d give her the first-class ticket and I’d sit in the back by myself.”
He and Aubrey exchanged another secret look and then she squealed and clapped excitedly. I had no clue what it meant.
“That was the perfect answer and you know it,” Aubrey said to her husband.
“I thought there was no wrong answer.”
“I lied.” Chance grimaced. “Look, I like you Finn. You might even be the guy for Adele, but I don’t know if I can give my blessing for you to storm the castle. If you’ve been trying to contact her and she’s ignored you, that must be for a reason.”
I deflated. He’d hit on something I’d thought, but hearing someone else say it made it real. No matter what I believed was best for Adele it was biased and there’d been no real indication she wanted to hear from me.
All I had to go on was gut instinct.
“We’re leaving in the morning. Let me see her and get a feel for the situation. She’s been through too much. I don’t want to wreck the life she’s building.”
I nodded and swallowed around the lump in my throat. Taking action was so much easier than sitting around, but I respected him too damn much to go against his wishes.
“Will you just tell her I said hello?”
“Of course.”
We stood and he walked me back through the house and to the front door.
“I’ll call you when we get back.”
“Yeah, alright.” I waved to Aubrey. She stood in the kitchen biting her lip and looking worried. I didn’t have a read on her, but the expression on her face had me leaning toward worried I’d blow up Adele’s life. “Have a safe trip.”
Finn
The following week, I was finally cleared to workout with the team. I had to take it easy and I wasn’t ready for games, but I was getting there. I threw myself into recovery as a distraction. On Thursday, the day the team flew to Seattle for another away game, I spent the whole day at the practice facility. I worked myself to exhaustion. That night I slept like the dead. Ten hours straight. My body ached like I hadn’t moved since my head hit the pillow.
I laid in bed, stiff and knowing I needed to move, but with everyone I knew gone, I had nowhere to go.
Which is why I was especially surprised to wake up to a missed call from an unknown number and a new voicemail.
Marshmallow curled up at my feet, I put the phone to my ear to listen and closed my eyes.
“Hey, Finn, it’s Aubrey. Listen, I’ve only got a few minutes. We’re in Pennsylvania at a rest stop letting Pixy get some air, but I haven’t been able to stop thinking about everything you said. Chance means well, but he forgets what it’s like when you’re fighting for someone you’re not sure feels the same way. This road trip reminded me of that.”
My eyes flew open and I sat up.
“Chance and I had our share of ups and downs at the beginning, too. You wouldn’t even believe me if I told you all the things he did to win me back and prove how much he cared about me.”
Her light laughter filtered through the phone and then cut off quickly and her serious tone was back. “I don’t know how Adele feels about you, but I know she hasn’t seemed herself since she went to New York and now that I know what happened between you two, I can’t help but wonder if that isn’t part of it. She and Richard were in California for Christmas and she just seemed… off, not as happy as I expected for someone who’d just been engaged and moved to an awesome new city for adventure. She should have been telling us about all the amazing things she’s done since getting to New York and how much she loves it there. At least for a few more months before she realized she’s a California girl through and through. I’m rambling.”
“We should get to New York late tonight or tomorrow, but I couldn’t go another day without reaching out. Here’s her address. What you do with it is up to you.” She rattled off the address which I memorized by repeating over and over in my head while I walked into the kitchen and grabbed a pen and paper.
When I was satisfied I’d written it down correctly, I hung up and braced myself on the counter with both hands. Now what? She’d left the message late last night so maybe they were already there. Should I wait to hear from her again?
I shuffled through the rest of the morning like a zombie. Part of me wanted to run to Adele at Aubrey’s urging, but the other part was still considering Chance’s words. I didn’t know which was right.
I petted Marshmallow for five minutes straight while she ate up the attention and I talked out my predicament.
“What do you think I should do?” I asked. She looked at me and meowed, which I took to mean I should absolutely go to Adele.
I left out enough cat food and water for a month and sent an email to my agent to see if he could find someone to stop in and check on Marshmallow while I was gone. I had two days before I needed to be back. Theoretically she should be fine by herself, but I didn’t want her to be all alone.
“Wish me luck,” I said as I gave her one last pet.
I took the first flight to New York and checked into a hotel near her apartment. It was almost ten o’clock at night when the cab pulled up outside her place. I didn’t have a plan, but I needed to be near her. Even if there was six floors and a brick wall between us.
I couldn’t get into the building, but I wasn’t ready to confront her either. I just wanted to see her first. If I saw her and she looked happy, there was still time to tuck tail and go back home.
I shivered, cursing myself for not bringing warmer clothes. It might have been Spring in California, but it still felt like Winter after sundown in New York.
Crossing the street, I went into a diner that smelled of grease and burnt coffee. I took a seat near the window and stared out at her building like it had all the answers.
“Good evening, handsome, can I get you something to drink?” a woman with jet black hair and icy blue eyes asked from the edge of the booth. She was early forties by my best guess, attractive, and totally working the little fifties style waitress outfit she was wearing. The nametag read Flo.
“Just coffee, Flo.”
She smirked. “We’ve got fresh cinnamon rolls.”
My stomach growled. Had I eaten today?
“Sure, bring me one of those.”
She nodded, a pleased smile on her red painted lips.
“Actually, bring me two. No
, three.”
Laughing, she rolled away on her skates. Yeah, roller skates. It was a little shot of nostalgia, not that I’d been alive in the fifties, but I’d seen Hilary Duff in that Cinderella movie as a kid, and Flo was a fiery version of that.
I stared across the street at the apartment building. People came and went every few minutes, but no sight of Adele or the boyfriend, I mean fiancé. Chance and the family had probably made it by now, too so I really had no business lurking around. I just needed a glimpse.
“Here you go.” Flo put the mug of coffee in front of me. “Creamer and sugar on the table.”
“Thanks.” I took a sip as it was and glanced out the window again.
I don’t know how long I looked out into the mostly dark street before the smell of cinnamon and sugar made my mouth water. Flo placed a plate with three giant cinnamon rolls in front of me.
“Can I get you anything else?”
“Wet wipes and a second stomach.”
“I think you can handle it,” she said with a snort and rolled off to another table.
She was back about the time I was finishing the second and pushing the plate away. Flo slid into the booth across from me.
“Tell me, should I be concerned that you’ve done nothing but stare out the window to the apartment building across the street?” She lifted a dark brow and pursed her lips. “Are you some sort of international spy?”
“Do I look like an international spy?” I said as I sat back in the booth and rested an arm casually on the table.
“I don’t know. I’ve never met one. You look a little Bond meets Bourne.”
“I think you’re as likely to be a spy as I am, Flo.”
She tilted her head back and laughed. “I like you.” She stood and skated over to the counter, picked up a folded newspaper, and brought it back to the table. “Here. At least try to make it look like you’re a regular customer.”
I glanced around to the other patrons. The people who were alone all had something to occupy them. A woman with a Kindle, a guy with a laptop, another with a paper. I picked up the paper. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d actually read one. “Thanks.”
Jilted Jock : A Hero Club Novel Page 14
