“Any particular reason you didn’t want to fill me in after any one of the many emails I sent?”
I’d hoped to keep the rest of the night light. I had to get on a plane in a few hours and then who knew when I’d see her again, but there were things I needed answers to so that I’d know where I stood when I left.
“Because I knew you’d come and say all the right things and we’d be here.” She waved a hand between us.
“Which is where exactly?”
“Sexed and talking feelings.”
I threw my head back and laughed. “I missed the hell out of you.”
“You look good,” she said. “Single life agrees with you.”
“Being in the same room as you agrees with me.”
She rolled her eyes. “Just because I slept with you doesn’t mean I’m going to start letting you feed me lines.”
“I’ve never fed you lines, sweetheart. We belong together. Tell me you don’t feel it?”
“Look, I’m not going to pretend I haven’t missed you. I wondered if it was possible you really cared for me or if you were just getting over your broken heart. We’re so different and I know you’ve done everything you could to show me you were sincere, but part of me believed you were just salty about being rejected and wanted to prove you could have me.”
I chuckled. “I’m salty as hell, sweetheart, but I meant every word. Those two weeks with you may have only been fourteen days, but they’ve stayed with me more than all the other days in my life. I can’t shake you. Don’t even want to.”
“I think maybe I hit you in the head too hard.”
“Maybe so.” I placed a soft kiss to her mouth and let my lips linger.
When I pulled back, she threaded our fingers together. “I came to New York because I needed to know if what I had with Richard was right for me. It was obvious really quickly that we’d grown apart, but I had to make sure my reservations about him weren’t because of you. I did consider reaching out after that, but when I looked you up online there you were all over LA. And I couldn’t even be mad about it because you thought I was with Richard.”
“But you were anyway.” I squeezed her hand.
“Try not to let it go to your head.”
I set my mug on a small table next to the couch and scooted closer. Her feet were pulled up under her and I grabbed both ankles and straightened her legs to rest on top of me. Dainty toes and cute feet – was that a thing? Because I was digging hers. Blue nail polish and all.
As I ran a finger down the arch of her foot discovering she wasn’t ticklish, she continued. “So, you can see why I didn’t respond to your emails.”
“If we’re going to give this a go, you’re going to have to accept that ninety-nine percent of what you see or read about me online is bullshit.”
“So, you didn’t kiss a Brazilian supermodel?”
I closed one eye and pulled my mouth into a grimace. Technically, Julianna had kissed me, and without giving me much warning. It’d lasted only long enough for me to get my bearings and end it, but did anything but the end result really matter to her?
“No. That did happen.” I held on to her feet as she tried to pull them away. “I meant everything I said in those emails. And so much more. I’m crazy about you. Yeah, after you left with Richard, I tried to move on, but I couldn’t.”
“What did you mean, if we’re going to give this a go? I live in New York, you’re in California. Speaking of, when do you have to head back?”
“Tonight.”
She bit down on her bottom lip.
“We’ll figure it out.”
“I’ve done long distance before, remember?”
“Yeah, but not with me.”
She smiled. “God, you’re cocky.”
I pulled her onto my lap and brushed her hair behind her shoulder. Placing a kiss on the bare skin between her neck and shirt, I offered what reassurances I could. “We’ll make it work. If you think a few thousand miles will deter me, then you’ve a lot to learn about me.”
“Okay.”
An hour later I left already knowing it’d be a long week, or maybe even weeks, before I could get back. I wasn’t a man that could provide her a lot of things right now, but determination I had in spades.
I needed to try and sleep on the plane if there was any chance I was going to make it through training tomorrow, but first I connected to the on-flight Wi-Fi and ordered flowers for every day for the next month. Then I sent her an email.
March 23, 12:41 a.m.
From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Subject: I miss you
Things I’m grateful for today:
1. Airplanes
2. Wi-Fi
3. You
4. Orgasms
5. Second chances
Finn
P.S. Can I take you out on a date next Saturday?
Finn
“What’d the doctor say?” Foster asked as he came in from practice. I’d missed today’s scrimmage to meet with the team doctor about my calf.
“He thinks two more weeks.”
“Are you coming with us to Texas this weekend or gonna stay back and feel sorry for yourself again like last weekend? I had no one to celebrate with after the game.”
“Like that’s ever stopped you from having a good time.”
He smiled. “It’s true. The only thing a guy needs to have a good time is a positive outlook. Body shots out of spilled vodka or however the saying goes.”
I stared at him a second.
“Lemonade out of lemons. You’ve never heard the expression?”
I laughed and shook my head. “I’ll see ya later.”
When I got to my truck, I plugged in my phone and called Adele.
“Hey,” she answered shyly. We’d talked every day this week, some nights for hours and yet she still sounded nervous every time.
“Hey there, gorgeous. How was your day?”
“Good. Thank you for the flowers… again.”
“You’re welcome.”
“You’re sort of ridiculous. You know that, right?”
I chuckled lightly under my breath as I drove. I cast a quick glance at the phone, wishing I could see her. “I like to think of it as endearing.”
“The people in my office are starting to give me funny looks.”
Yeah, that’s right, I’d sent them to her office instead of her apartment. Sharing the beauty of flowers… or maybe just making it known she had someone who wanted to give her those things. I wasn’t trying to lay claim or anything that caveman, but I wanted the whole office, fuck, the whole damn world to know she deserved it. All the ridiculous, all the over the top, completely frivolous gestures a man could make.
“I looked at flights this morning. I can be there Friday morning around seven, but then I’ll have to turn around and come back Saturday night so I can get back in time for therapy Sunday morning. Maybe we can have breakfast before you go to work on Friday?”
She didn’t respond.
“Or not. I’ll probably be tired so I can crash and when you get off work, we can have a proper night out.”
I checked my phone to make sure the call hadn’t ended.
“Adele? Are you still there?”
“You’re really coming this weekend?”
“Uhh, yeah. We’ve been talking about it all week. Did you make other plans?”
“No, sorry, nothing like that. I’m glad you’re coming. I’m just surprised. I saw you last weekend.”
“Yes, and it’s already been four painful days without you.”
Her light laughter filled my truck.
“Get used to it, sweetheart.”
“All I’m trying to say is, it’s not necessary. I know you’re busy in LA and I don’t expect you to fly here every weekend.”
“Good because once I’m cleared to play, it might be every other week until I can find a day to fly out.” I pulled into my driveway and hit the
garage opener. “I know you and what’s his face went weeks without seeing each other, but that’s not the type of relationship I want.”
“You keep saying relationship, but Finn, we haven’t even tried dating yet. Don’t you think we’re rushing things?”
I killed the engine and sat in the silence asking myself if she was right. Was my need to push ahead at breakneck speed some unresolved wound from the fact she’d chosen Richard over me – the second woman in my life to leave me for someone else in the span of a month?
I knew, deep in my gut, that wasn’t it.
“Dating is for getting to know the other person and deciding if you like them. I already know how I feel about you and even though it was months ago and only for a short while, those nights sitting on your couch together were better than any dates I’ve been on. If you need to slow down to catch up to how I feel, we can do that. But I don’t need it. I already know I want to keep you; I don’t need a date or ten to figure that out.”
I picked up the phone and hit the FaceTime button. She accepted a second later and I was staring into those blue eyes I’d missed like hell. She thought I could go weeks, as in plural, without seeing her? Girl was crazy.
“You’re pretty sweet when you want to be.”
“Does that mean I can come?”
“Yes, I’d love to see you, Finn.”
My plane was delayed, so I didn’t get into New York until after eight on Friday morning. Adele was already at work, so I took a nap, and then ventured out to meet her for lunch.
Grabbing flowers on top of the ones that should have been delivered seemed like overkill, but I didn’t want to show up empty-handed. A café one block before her building came into view. A cupcake store with bright colors and the smell of sugar so thick in the air I swore I could taste it. There was a short line, so I stared at the many flavors while I waited.
Chocolate wasn’t just chocolate, it was Triple Choco Addict. A red one with hot pink sparkles was Dazzling Strawberry. And so on and so forth. A man couldn’t ask for any one of them without sounding ridiculous, but when it came my turn, I leaned on the counter with one hip and with the straightest face I could muster, asked, “Can I get a dozen of the Better Than Sex cupcakes?”
The girl behind the counter bit back a smile.
“Should I have gone with Orgasmic Vanilla instead?”
Her cheeks pinked.
“They’re for my girlfriend.”
“I’d go with half of each.”
Adele walked out of her building at noon on the dot, eyed me with a large hot pink box and smiled hesitantly. “What’s in the box?”
“You’ll see.”
“Where are we going? I’m starving.”
“I was hoping you’d be okay with letting me stuff you full of sugar and kiss you senseless. I didn’t plan on real food. We can grab something else though, if you prefer?”
She giggled and linked her arm through mine. “Sounds perfect.”
We found a bench outside a small park. Adele’s eyes widened and her smile was bigger than I’d ever seen as I lifted the box on the cupcakes.
“Those look divine.” She went for the chocolate one, lifting it from the box and testing the frosting by running her index finger along the edge and bringing it to her mouth to sample.
“Better than sex?”
“Excuse me?”
I took a big bite out of an Orgasmic Vanilla and tried to talk around it. “The name of the flavor.”
Once she’d taken a small nibble, I asked. “So, is it?”
She blushed. “No.”
“Try this one. It’s Orgasmic Vanilla.” I fed her from my half-eaten cupcake.
“Mmmm. That one is good too.”
We shared our cupcakes with each other and when I offered her another, she shook her head. I set the box on the bench next to me and moved closer.
“Did you really think we were going to eat twelve cupcakes for lunch?” She asked, smiling.
“Didn’t know how hungry you’d be.” I dipped my head to take her lips with mine. I kissed her softly. A tougher challenge than it sounded. I’d waited for months to be able to kiss her whenever I wanted, but some part of me also realized she needed to know the things I wanted from her went beyond physical.
“I’ll make it up to you tonight with real food. Dinner anywhere you want.”
She smiled. “Deal. Now kiss me like you mean it. I’ve only got fifteen minutes until I have to get back.”
Anywhere she wanted turned out to be her place. We went shopping for groceries together, which turned out to be fun. She perused the vegetables and I perused her.
Even though I knew she wasn’t much for cooking, I let her order me around in the kitchen. Adele wielding a sharp knife was a little scary. Hot, but scary.
“Learned to cook, I see.”
“Not really. I finally admitted defeat that I’m never going to be the next Gordon Ramsay and found one simple thing I could cook. Literally, I Googled the easiest recipe on the planet and found this fifteen-minute pasta meal. I have it at least twice a week.”
We sat on the couch with our food and caught up on life. We’d talked on the phone, but in person it was so much easier to let the conversation flow naturally.
“Have you been back to California much?”
“Just for Christmas.” She ducked her head a little, pausing with her fork stuck in the pasta on her plate. “I’m sorry that I left the way I did, without even hearing you out.”
“I suppose I understand. You two had history.”
“That’s true. I did feel like I owed it to Richard to try and make things work, but if I’m super honest, I think I was hiding behind him because I was afraid of what would happen if I admitted how I felt about you. Being with someone like you scares me.”
“I’m not someone. And you don’t need to be scared of me. Ever.”
She nodded.
“When did you two end things?” She still hadn’t told me a lot of the details surrounding her breakup with Richard and I’d selfishly wanted to forget about any reminder that she’d chosen him over me.
“Right after the new year. Richard is a great guy and he’s everything I thought I wanted, but…”
She hesitated, but I hung on her every word and I needed to know how that sentence ended.
“What?”
“But those two weeks with you changed me. It reminded me that I’m not meek or scared. After rehab, I made myself believe I was. Maybe I thought if I hadn’t changed then it meant I’d failed somehow. Failed the program, failed myself, failed Chance.” She met my stare straight on. “You made me feel strong again and allowed me to picture a new life, wild and adventurous. Might take some time to put it in action.”
“I didn’t do anything. Besides, you’ve been living on your own taking on the city – I’d say that’s pretty wild and adventurous.” I found her leg under the table and wrapped mine around it.
She dropped her fork and looked at me with hunger and need. Looked like dinner would have to wait. Standing, I took her hand and helped her to her feet.
“Wanna do something else wild and adventurous?”
She nodded, wide eyed.
Scooping her up in my arms, I walked us toward her bed. A shelving unit acted as a barrier between it and the living / dining area. I hadn’t been on this side and I may not have paid that close of attention now if it hadn’t caught my eye. It was the picture I’d sent her of me and Marshmallow. It wasn’t framed like the other photos, but she’d printed it on photo paper and set it where she could see it. And the cherry on top, she’d placed it in front of an old photo of her and Richard at CJ’s first birthday party. Take that, Dick.
I set her down and circled her neck with both hands as I kissed her softly.
She moaned deep in her throat and arched her pelvis up to make contact. I ground down in slow circles.
“I want to fuck you in every way possible – ways I’ve never even thought of, but right now, I’m go
nna make love to you, sweetheart.”
We laid in bed naked talking and making out like teenagers for most of the day on Saturday. Neither of us mentioning the time ticking by or the fact I was leaving in a few hours. She asked about California, the team, Marshmallow, and I made her fill me in on her job and the life she’d built in New York.
With her head on my chest, I’d nearly drifted off when she asked, “Have you seen her?”
At first, I had no idea who she was talking about. Honest to God, I hadn’t even thought of her today or yesterday – and all the days since reconnecting with Adele, Cindy had only been a fleeting thought mostly in regard to avoiding her.
“She’s called a few times, and I saw her at a charity event, but so far I’ve managed to not speak to her.”
“Really?” Adele lifted her head and looked at me. Even in the darkness I could make out the surprise in her expression.
“There isn’t much to say.”
“Don’t you want some sort of closure from it all?”
“Her bailing on our wedding day is all the closure I need.”
“Finn.” The way she said my name, like she pitied me, made me realize how true it was. There was nothing left for Cindy and me to say to one another.
“Maybe it’s juvenile to avoid her, but I don’t think talking it out will do anything but piss me off. She made her choice and I’m glad she did. The execution was harsh and I’m not sure I’ll ever feel the same way about weddings again, but it led me to you and for that I’m grateful.”
She seemed satisfied with my answer and I blew out a breath, glad to be done talking about Cindy. I didn’t want to bring any of that baggage into my time with Adele.
Neither of us felt like doing much as the hour to leave grew closer. We settled on the couch watching TV, tangled up and somber. The ride to the airport was silent. Adele came with me, even though I told her it wasn’t necessary. I was hopping on a plane to California and wishing there was some way I could take her with me.
Jilted Jock : A Hero Club Novel Page 16
