by Harlow Layne
Every second feels like hours. My emotions are ping-ponging inside me going from despair to anger to guilt. I should have gone with her. If I’d been by her side, nothing would have happened.
My dad holds his phone out for me to read a text that just came in from Mom. Delilah’s parents along with Ava are getting on the first available flight and will be here tomorrow.
“Thanks. I wish they were here now, so they could get us answers.” I pull out my phone to see a dozen messages and missed calls, but don’t bother to read them. What I do see is we’ve been here for well over an hour without an update. “What’s taking so long?”
“I can’t say, Son, but she’s in good hands.”
“What if it’s the baby? I tried to feel if there was any movement and felt none. What does that mean?”
“It could mean a number of things.” He claps me on the back and digs his fingers into my tense shoulder muscles. “Perhaps the baby was sleeping.”
I hear what he doesn’t say, though. Maybe the baby wasn’t moving because she’s hurt or worse.
“When I see her, I’m asking her to marry me. I can’t wait any longer. I’m done giving her time.”
“Maybe asking her first thing isn’t the smartest thing, Son. She’ll likely be out of it, and if not then in pain. Wait until she’s safe at home.”
“You think she’ll say no?” I couldn’t bear the possibility.
“Not on a normal day, but after today and whatever else she’s gone through, we don’t know what’s possible. Feel out the situation before you storm in there and demand marriage.”
“I wouldn’t demand it. I’d do it proper,” I bite out.
“Would you? Did you plan on asking with her in a hospital bed after being attacked?” I shake my head because he’s right. “No, you didn’t, so you’re going to wait, and then she’ll say yes.”
“What if she doesn’t pull through? I’ve never seen anyone as messed up as she is.” Deep down, I know it was Stanton. What if he keeps coming back until he gets the job done?
“She’s strong.” He moves to squat down in front of me and locks eyes with me. “I know it’s hard while we sit here waiting, but you have to believe in how strong she is.”
“Is this what being in love is like? Always fearing the worst is going to happen?”
“Somedays, but for the most part, it’s spending your life with the person you love most in the world. Your best friend, lover, and confidant. It’s having someone there to share all of your good moments with, but also your bad.”
“I want to be in there for her,” I say hoarsely.
“I know you do, Son, and you will be. You said she was unconscious, so she doesn’t know if you’re there or not.”
I know he’s right, but that still doesn’t make it any easier.
“When I tried to get back there, I told them the baby is mine,” I confess, making sure no one overhears.
“She is yours. She may not have your blood, but that little girl will always be yours, blood or not.”
The door swings open, and this time I don’t have it in me to stand. A woman in scrubs looks around the room as she takes off her mask. “Mr. Black?”
“Here,” I jump up and rush the short distance to her.
“I wanted to inform you that your daughter has been born. Right now, she’s in the PICU being checked out. As soon as you can visit her, someone will be out to bring you back.”
My daughter.
“It’s too early,” I argue.
“It is, but she’s breathing on her own. Like I said, someone will be out to get you as soon as you can meet her.”
“What about Delilah? Is she okay? We’ve had no word on her.”
“As you know, she was badly beaten up. One of the complications was the placental abruption, and we had to perform a cesarean. Ms. Williams is in recovery and once she’s awake and asking to see you, you can see her.”
“Is she going to be okay?”
The nurse looks around and then leans in to speak quietly. “I’m not supposed to give you any information, but I can tell you this. She’s going to be sore after the c-section and the bruises. There are a couple of fractured ribs that will make moving around more difficult, but give her some time and she’ll be fine.” She moves back a step “I need to get back in there. It’s a busy night. It must be a full moon or something.”
“Thank you, doctor. I appreciate it more than you’ll ever know.” My body sags with relief and now I feel drained.
“You’re a father.” My dad pats me on the back. “How does it feel?”
“Exhausting.” I chuckle humorlessly. “I missed her birth. She’ll always know I wasn’t there.”
“But you can tell her how much you wished you were. That you were right outside the doors. She doesn’t need to know the rest. At least not for a long, long time. I’m going to step outside to call your mom and tell her the good news.”
All I can do is sit down and nod. My mind is whirling with the news. We haven’t even decided on a name yet. We thought we had time. We should have stayed home and then none of this would have happened.
Pulling my phone out, I dial her dad’s number. He answers on the first ring. “Hello? Max?”
“Hey, I just wanted to let you know a doctor came out said they had to perform a c-section so the baby’s here. She’s in the PICU and Delilah’s in recovery.”
“Have you seen either one of them yet?”
“Not yet. She made it sound as if I’ll get to see the baby first. I don’t know if Delilah ever woke up. When I found her, she was—”
“She’s going to pull through. She has to,” Ryder chokes out.
“The doctor made it sound like she would, but until I see her awake with my own two eyes, I won’t stop worrying.”
“Call me after you see her and keep me updated. We won’t be there until around eleven tomorrow morning.”
He sounds just as worried as I am. I’ve been a father for all of two minutes and I already can’t imagine how it would feel to be thousands of miles away from my little girl knowing she’s hurt and there’s nothing I can do about it.
“Beck is staying with November and Asher with some of the other kids. He doesn’t know what’s happening. Should I tell him?” I don’t want him not to trust me after this.
“Not yet. Let him have tonight.”
Yeah, tonight. Tomorrow he’ll see his mom and know there really are monsters in the world.
“I’ll call you when I know something more,” I tell him, and then hang up.
Leaning back in my chair, I stretch my legs out, close my eyes, and wait.
When I open my eyes again, it will either be a new beginning with my family or the worst/best day of my life.
21
Delilah
Confused, I blink, or at least I think I’m blinking except when I try to open my eyes, I’m only met with blackness. I try to wipe at my eyes, but my arms are too heavy to lift.
I want to sit up and figure out where I am, but pain and something else altogether keeps me down. My entire body feels like it's being held down by a lead weight and my head is foggy. I can’t remember where I am or what I was last doing.
Where am I?
“I think she’s waking up,” a familiar voice says.
Dad?
I try to turn my head toward the sound, but it’s like I’m under water and can’t come to the surface.
“Beauty?” Max questions, and there’s a squeeze of my hand.
My fingers spasm in his hold, or at least I think they do.
“Open your eyes, beauty.” There’s a strange warble in his voice that has me doing everything I can to open my eyes to no avail.
A hand smooths over my forehead. “Take your time, sweetie. I know it’s hard.”
“Fight, baby girl,” my dad chokes out.
I try. I don’t want my loved ones to worry about me. I want to wake up and tell them everything is going to be okay, but instead, blackness wi
ns out.
I wake up the same way over and over again. I have no idea how much time passes between each episode. Each time I try to move and try to open my eyes, but I’m unsuccessful so many times I don’t know if I’ll ever break out of this in between.
The next time I wake up, something feels different. I’m still in pain, but now it’s more localized. My face and stomach throb. Tears sting the backs of my eyes and then I feel wetness trail down my cheek.
“Delilah, come back to us. We need you. Your daughter needs you.” My mom’s voice is close but far away at the same time.
My daughter?
Why would she need me?
Bradley.
I remember.
He found me and dragged me into the trees.
My face.
My stomach.
My baby.
What happened to my baby?
My hand makes jerking movements until it’s covering the area of my torso that throbs.
I don’t know what happened, but I can feel the difference. My baby’s gone.
After what feels like forever, my eyes finally blink open. The world is blurry, but each time I blink it becomes more focused.
First, I see my mom’s blue hair. There’s no denying her blue shade. She’s leaning against someone. My dad. I blink again and see the worry lines around his eyes and the way he’s holding my mom together.
“Mom? Dad?” I rasp out.
Blinking again, I see their heads pop up before they lean close and take my hand in theirs.
“Baby girl,” my dad sighs out. “You’ve had us so worried.”
I tug at their hands and place them lightly over my deflated stomach. “Where’s my baby?”
My dad brings our hands up to his mouth and kisses my knuckles. “She’s fine. She’s in the PICU waiting to meet her mom.”
I watch as my mom hits the red button on my bed. A moment later a voice calls out into the room. “Yes,” a stern, but feminine voice rings out.
“My daughter’s awake and talking.” She says this as if I’ve been awake before but didn’t speak.
“Okay, I’ll inform the doctor and he’ll be in soon.”
“Where’s Beck?” He was at the game. He must be so scared.
“He’s with my mom and dad,” I hear a rumble from beside me.
Turning my head carefully, I see Max sitting on the other side of the bed. He has dark slashes under his eyes that make it look like he hasn’t slept in days.
“Max,” I rasp out. I lift my hand, wanting to touch his face, but the tubes in my hand tug when I move, so I stop. “Come closer.”
He leans in, but it’s not enough.
“Why won’t you move closer?” I whisper, wanting to feel the scruff on his face.
“I’m afraid I’ll hurt you.” His fingers twitch over mine.
“I want to touch your face. You look so…” I don’t want to tell him how worried and bad he looks when I have no idea how long I’ve been here.
“You can say bad. Awful, even. I haven’t slept in two days. Neither have your parents. We’ve been so worried about you. The doctors couldn’t explain why you wouldn’t wake up.”
“I’ve been here for two days?” I ask as I try to sit up. But there’s a sharp pain on one side along with my whole stomach. I’m weak and it feels like my stomach has no muscles to use. No matter how hard I try there’s nothing but pain.
Mom stands and pushes me down gently. “No, no, no, honey. Lay back. You have to take it easy.”
“What’s wrong with me?” I look at each of them, waiting for them to tell me the damage Bradley inflicted upon me.
“They had to deliver the baby by c-section, but like your mother said, she’s fine.” My dad smiles at me and brushes his fingers along my hairline. “You’re pretty banged up. You have two fractured ribs and lots of bruises, but they’ll all heal in time.”
A doctor and a nurse come in ushering everyone from the room so they can check me out. I answer all their questions, but my sole focus is on when I can see my daughter. It’s my one and only goal.
“Have you seen her?” I look from my parents to Max once they’re back in the room and sitting around the bed. “Is she beautiful?”
“Max thought you should see her first, and we tried to wait, but you were asleep for so long.” My dad’s eyes turn glassy for a moment before he rests his forehead on my hand.
My mom runs her fingers through his hair. “We didn’t know how long you’d be asleep, and I knew you wouldn’t want her to be alone for so long.”
No, I don’t want my baby girl to be alone. Not even for a minute. I want her to feel loved from the moment she was born. I hate that I couldn’t be there with her, but I’m grateful they were.
“She looks just like you did when you were born. She’s perfect.” She reaches out to touch my face, but stops. Her chin quivers. “Are you in much pain?” She looks to my dad. “Where is the nurse with her pain meds?”
“It hurts, but I’ll live. I want to see my baby.” I’ll give up all the drugs in the world that will make my pain go away if it means I can meet my daughter.
“The nurse should be here soon. She’ll make you feel better and then you can meet your daughter,” my dad says in a soothing voice.
“Did you decide on a name yet?” my mom asks with hope in her voice.
My poor baby’s been here for two long days without a name.
I start to shake my head but stop when all it does is make my head hurt more.
“Can I have some water?” I ask, my voice still rough from misuse.
“Of course, sweetheart. I should have asked you first thing.” She pours me some water and holds the cup with a straw in it up to my waiting mouth.
I take long draws, relishing the way the cool water feels against my parched throat. When I come up for air, I find everyone looking at me. “I guess I was thirsty.” I look to Max, who already looks lighter than he did when I first saw him. “I thought I had more time to name her. It hasn’t been that long since we found out for sure we’re having a girl.”
Max cracks a small smile, but it doesn’t meet his eyes. “She definitely wasn’t cooperating on that front.”
“Surely you must have had some names you like,” Mom urges.
“I do, but I also thought I’d know when I saw her. Never did I think she’d be born with these circumstances.” Emotion clogs my throat as tears well up and track down my cheeks. “She probably thinks I’ve abandoned her.”
“No, baby girl.” My dad stands and moves to stand up by my head. He brushes my hair from my face and dries my tears. “She doesn’t think that. You know I wasn’t there when you were born, right? I was on a plane and devastated I missed your birth, but you know what?” I barely give a shake to my head because I don’t know. “You didn’t care or know I wasn’t there.”
“I still loved you.” My lower lip trembles. “But you understand how I feel.”
Leaning down, he kisses my forehead. “I do, but don’t let it ruin your first meeting with her. She’s going to love you just as you love her.”
A smiling nurse different from before comes in with a wheelchair. “Let’s get you set up here,” she says as she changes out one of my IV bags. “Now hit the button here and we’ll give it a few minutes to work before we get you out of bed. Are the new parents excited to meet their baby?” she asks while checking my stats.
“Yes,” I answer and look to Max.
He gives me a weak smile. “I wanted to see her for the first time with you.”
“Come here,” I beckon him. This time he listens, and when he’s close enough, I lift my hands and pull him the rest of the way, so I can brush my mouth to his. I’m sure my breath is atrocious, so I don’t take it any further.
Hovering over me, he speaks so only I can hear. “I told them I’m the father. I thought it would get me back to see you, but they wouldn’t let me past the waiting room door.”
Cupping one side of his face, I try to ke
ep my voice steady as I speak. The number of emotions I’m feeling is overwhelming. “You are the father, Max. I hate that you waited but thank you. Let’s go see our daughter. Together.”
His eyes turn glassy as he nods. When his phone starts to ring, a look of annoyance crosses his face. He pulls his phone out and looks down at it. “Give me a minute, I need to answer this.”
I watch as he walks out of the room with his phone to his ear and then turns to my parents.
“He’s been so worried about you, baby girl.” My dad rubs my leg through the blanket.
“He loves you so much,” my mom says with a watery smile. “I’m glad you have him in your life.”
“Me too, Mom. Me too.”
It’s only a couple of minutes later when Max walks in with a beaming smile. All the worry is gone from his face and he looks like my happy Max.
“That was Cobi. They caught Bradley. Cobi said he’ll be by later to take your statement since they’ll need it to formally charge Stanton. They found evidence in his SUV that might bring down the rest of his family.”
“I won’t be safe until they’re all behind bars. If they know I’m the reason they arrested him, they’ll come after me. They won’t care if I just had a baby. In fact, they’ll probably think it will make it easier to get me out of the picture.”
“Don’t worry. You won’t be left alone until you’re safe,” Max grips my hand. “I’m not letting you out of my sight for a long time to come.”
“I guess it’s a good thing I like you then.”
“I guess so.” He winks.
The nurse who was in here earlier comes in with determination on her face. “Your meds should have kicked in by now, so let’s get you up and out of bed.”
While the pain has faded, I know it’s going to hurt getting up and I’m dreading it.
Standing at the side of my bed, she encourages me to move. “The first time will be the hardest and after that, you’ll know what you have to do to get yourself upright.”
Gritting my teeth, I swear I almost crack a tooth as I try to eventually sit up. It’s worse than I imagined, but now that I’m out of bed, I know I won’t have to get back in for a while.
