Tierney acquiesced. It wasn't like either of them had money for a hotel. Certainly not when they were facing whatever extra charges would come from fixing their homes and replacing their damaged things. Elliot was leaving a wide swath in his wake.
They made a plan and he handed over the copied address as he climbed out of her car and watched her drive away. He couldn't help the sinking feeling that everything was going to go even more sideways than it already had. Would she even show up?
CHAPTER FORTY-ONE
Tierney read the message that Ronan had already settled in to the cabin. He had said earlier that he was picking up dinner. There had been something in the wording that suggested he didn’t think she would show up.
She could admit she'd almost turned around several times. It was easy to talk herself out of getting her own hotel room—too expensive, too easy for Elliot to find her. It was harder to talk herself out of taking her nearly full tank of gas and just driving away. She could grab Sean ... if she even knew where he was. But that was the point, even if Elliot tortured her, she wouldn't be able to tell him where to find her son. In the end, she'd headed to the cabin simply because it was the only reasonable option.
First though, she had gone back to the house and worked with the officers on scene. It took three of them and the whole bag of treats to find Mr. Kittens. The big lug was cowering under a bush. Probably a smart move, she was near to where she'd last seen her babies, but safe from most of the damage. Mr. Kittens was a mess, but one of the officers provided Tierney with an old towel and she had the cat wrapped up and brushed off quickly. Within a few more minutes, the panicked mama was back in the cardboard box, reunited with her babies. She licked each one of them, checking them over and making Tierney glad the vet had cleaned the soot off.
Maybe the mama cat hadn't abandoned them after all. Maybe she'd simply been petrified, just like Tierney. Maybe running was the only thing the cat could think to do.
"Same, sister. Same," Tierney told the cat as she buckled the box into the passenger seat.
She was exhausted and not ready to face Ronan again. But there were no distractions left. Also, she needed to get the kittens into a house and out of the car. She told herself Ronan would have food waiting, and she knew she needed it.
By the time she walked in the door of the small cabin, she was ready to fall over.
He must have found the frog by the porch, because he had the lights and the heat on. The one-bedroom bungalow somehow managed to be even smaller than her place was ... had been.
The neighborhood was worn down just like the outside of this place. Repair patches littered the walls. It seemed as though someone was attempting to remodel it, but at none too quick a speed. Tierney couldn't complain.
"You made it," Ronan greeted her, making it sound again as though he had doubted she would show up.
Did he not realize she had no other option?
She set the box of kittens onto the table, but even before she let go, she realized that was not safe. So she moved it to the corner behind the couch. Tierney couldn't help but wonder if this house, too, would burn and if it would burn with them inside.
One task down, she headed back to the table where Ronan had set out the food. It was nothing brilliant, just Philly cheesesteaks and fries, but it was hot and she desperately needed it. But she didn't quite make it to the table. She needed something else more.
Ronan was standing in the kitchen, leaning against the counter, in the same place he'd been when she walked in the door. He stayed motionless as if afraid to spook her, as if waiting for her to make a decision. So she made one and she walked right into his arms.
For a moment, he didn't seem to believe her. Or he didn't want her there.
For the moment, she didn't care. She just needed to feel him there, solid and steady. Upright when she was about to fall over. She could hold onto him, even if he wouldn't put his arms around her.
Tierney knew she didn't deserve his touch, not after what she'd put him through, not when it was so complicated even before any of that.
Her breath let out and her shoulders dropped. She felt safe here, even if it was just an illusion. She didn't know how long she'd plastered herself to him before his arms lifted and held on loosely. He seemed to understand she just needed a rock to rest against for a moment.
When she finally felt like she could breathe again, she lifted her head to say, "Thank you." But the words didn't come out.
His mouth crushed down over hers, the heat flaring immediately. Ronan's arms tightened, no longer comforting her, but holding her in place so he could ravage her.
She'd been so tired, but every cell flared to life. She needed this, needed him inside her, needed to escape for a moment and pretend she could have him, that she could love him. His hands were already unbuttoning the front of her shirt, finding her breasts, peeling back her bra and making her arch her back. She pressed toward his touch then his mouth, her fingers lacing through his hair, holding him in place.
But only for a minute. Then she was scrambling to unhook her bra and toss it aside. She yanked at his shirt ungracefully, tugging and twisting until he helped. He was still pinned between her and the counter, but she wasn't going to give him space to get away. They kissed like hungry lovers as they tried to unzip and shed each other's jeans. It would have been comical had Tierney been able to feel anything but the flames that consumed her. She wanted this man.
Everything was going to go to hell. She knew it.
If she could have this one moment, this one more time with him, she told herself she would be okay.
She wasn't sure she was even going to survive the next several days, and somehow that made this free-for-all a ride with only pleasure and no consequences.
They stood naked and needy, hands reaching, clothes balled and dropped on the floor. She stroked him, enjoying the way his head dropped back, the way he was held mesmerized by her touch. But then he returned the favor and she cried out as his fingers found her wet and ready.
The world tipped and tilted, and she could have been falling but she was safe in his arms. It took a second to realize he'd lifted her and was carrying her the short distance to the table. Instead of sweeping aside the food and drinks, movie style, he pulled out a chair. Setting her on her feet, he sat down, grabbed her hips and pulled her onto him.
The hot pressure of him sliding inside sent her head back as his fingers gripped into her hips, moving the two of them together.
They pushed against each other, each reaching for a peak. It was one Tierney knew she'd only find with him. Whatever she was to Ronan, he'd always been her dream. And here she was, getting one tiny slice of it. As usual, they didn't talk, but moved together like they were one.
Her name was reverent on his lips as he came. Tierney, not Emily. She didn't want to go back to being that naive, stupid girl. She liked who Tierney was, even if she wouldn't be Tierney for much longer.
When her own waves of brain-melting pleasure had finally left her human again, she leaned her head down onto his shoulder.
"Tee?"
She didn't answer. She liked that name, too. It made her not just Tierney Doyle, but his.
The world came back into focus. She was naked, straddling a man with a scar on his side, in a kitchen that had seen better days.
"Tee?"
She shook her head again. She could feel the world crowding in around her, stealing the joy she'd found.
CHAPTER FORTY-TWO
It had been two days and they should have been blissful. But somehow the happiness couldn't creep in around the corners. Tierney remained walking on eggshells that Elliot Vander clef had scattered in every direction.
He knew that by laying low he was keeping them guessing, making sure they never really rested. It was working.
She'd been waking at all hours. Though she slept well when she slept next to Ronan, she still wasn't making it for more than a few hours at a time. Often, she would get up and check all the locks
before coming back to bed. She'd lost the knives and the baseball bat in the fire. The gun had been on her, but she liked knowing there were other options. She'd been pulled from the safety of the familiar, and it was another layer of stress.
Elliot was good at that.
This time, however, before she could roll out and put her bare feet onto the hardwood floor, Ronan had draped his arm across her waist, his naked body pressing into hers. Despite the fact that she'd had more sex in the past two days than she'd had in the past 10 years, she could tell that wasn't what he was going for.
With a soul deep sigh, feeling something big coming, she rolled over to face him. She tried to keep his arm across her, wanting or needing that contact. "What is it?"
With a deep breath of his own, he shook his head. His expression was pained, and she hated that he'd woken up that way. She was afraid she knew what he wanted. The thing they hadn’t yet addressed.
He didn't look away from her, but he wasn't quite making eye contact either. "What you said about Wayne Davies ...?"
Though she’d seen it coming, Tierney still felt it pierce deep in her heart. Her whole throat clamped down and she waited, unable to speak.
"It was true, wasn't it?"
Fuck. Why this, why now? But she'd thrown it at him, hard. She had to expect it to bounce back sooner or later. "It was true."
"Tell me." It was soft, but a command she couldn't deny.
So she barely raised her voice above a whisper, unable to speak the words loudly, unable to wound him any more than she already had. She told him about Sean getting sick and needing to go home early. "They had been together upstairs."
"No question?" he asked.
Somehow, she understood: He wanted to be sure that she wasn't misreading the situation. She almost said, they weren't fucking making crafts, Ronan, but she held it back. This time, she said as little as possible. So, she simply nodded. She was certain.
"I'm assuming it wasn't the only time?"
This was harder to answer. She looked away, though she didn't mean to, and hoped he didn't think she was lying. She was just uncertain how to tell this man that his wife, her sister, had not been the faithful woman he'd believed she was. "I saw them together other times over the years."
"You said you thought Paddy wasn't mine."
Shit. She'd had to throw that back at him. "I don't know, Ronan. I really don't."
"It's okay." He held his hand up. But it wasn't to stop her from talking, just from apologizing.
She was grateful he felt that way. The whole mess wasn't her fault, but she had certainly had her own role to play.
When he'd been quiet for a while, it was clear he was waiting on her, and Tierney could not deny this man anything.
When she started talking, it all came gushing out. "I saw her with other men over the years. I ran into her in Lincoln with some blonde guy later. That might be Paddy's father ..." But she didn't finish the sentence. Father wasn't the right term, sperm donor was correct. Ronan had been Paddy's father. She skipped beyond that. "The day that I caught them, it wasn't the only time I saw her with Wayne. And it was clear it wasn't ..."
She didn't know how to say this next part.
"A one-time incident?" Ronan asked, sarcasm dripping as he saved her from having to tell him.
They stayed silent for a few moments, Tierney absorbing what she'd just done. Had she pulled out the knife she'd stabbed into him earlier? Or had she simply twisted and plunged it deeper? She didn't know yet.
Ronan seemed to be trying to make sense of it all. His next question was one she was wholly unprepared for. "Why did you keep it a secret? I thought we were friends. Wouldn't you tell your friend something like that?"
It had been hard enough hurting him but the twist of shame at her betrayal might be worse. She deserved to be held accountable for the part she had played. She was in large part responsible for this hell. She'd wondered sometimes if Siorse and Paddy might still be alive if Tierney had told Ronan what she knew. They might have gotten divorced, and her sister wouldn't have been in that place at that time. But Siorse would never have forgiven her.
"I love my sister," she started. "I know we were only actually sisters for a handful of years. And I know she didn't make the decision to take me in, her parents did. But she hugged me and welcomed me and told me she’d always wanted a little sister. She never called me stupid for the mistakes I'd made with Elliot, even though I called myself that over and over again. She was the one who told me that anyone would have fallen for him and that he chose me because I was young and beautiful. Siorse is the one who built me back up when I needed it the most."
The tears were flowing freely now. It was complex. "Siorse at eighteen kept a monumental secret for me. So when I caught her with Wayne ... I don't know. I don't know what it was. Clearly, she wasn't as sweet and angelic as everyone seemed to think." Tierney had always known her big sis had done ecstasy on school field trips, called her younger sister in the middle of the night to come drive her home when she'd been stumbling drunk, and maybe high as a kite. But now was not the time to tell Ronan that. Siorse was every direction at once, and this was the time for simple. "Maybe she panicked, but she threatened me. She told me she'd keep my secret as long as I kept hers."
Tierney wanted to explain more, to tell him she hadn't been able to break that. Siorse had put Sean's safety on the table, and there was nothing Tierney would put in front of her child. But now, all of it seemed like excuses that she didn't want to make.
There were no more words between them as he nodded. Maybe he’d suspected all along, because he absorbed it but didn’t seem devastated. A moment later, his arm tightened around her waist. His mouth found hers and she felt forgiven, even if she knew they still weren't safe.
CHAPTER FORTY-THREE
Tierney wiped down the bar as though it were another normal day. Nothing was normal. Her world was tilted.
Elliot might not have meant it, but his games had pushed her and Ronan together, giving her even more to lose.
Then, this nothing had set in, forcing her to pretend that life was as it always was. Though her father had managed to keep her out of the job for three days, suggesting it was better if she laid low after the house fire, she'd had to do something.
Unable to simply sit on someone else's couch and watch their three channels of TV while drinking soda and eating carry out pizza, she'd gone stir crazy very quickly. Sooner or later, Elliot would find them in their little cabin haven—if he hadn't already.
The world kept turning. She was getting updates on her house. Everything was either burned to a crisp, smoke damaged, or waterlogged. There were just a handful of items that could be saved. Oddly enough, strange random things made it through. Sean's baby book had a burned corner. But once she’d washed it off, it mostly survived. She'd handed it to Mom Doyle for safekeeping. The woman had cried grateful tears and hugged her tight.
A package of bacon had somehow been flung from the fridge into the side yard, perfectly intact. Two of the pillows from her bed seemed like they would be usable again. And the wall to her bedroom and the bath remained standing, most of the cleaners and bath items under the sink had made it just fine. Not that any of this was the kind of foundation she could rebuild her life on. She would simply have to start from the bottom up and it was going to be a harsh blow when she saw Sean again and had to tell him. If she got to see Sean again.
At least Ronan had his job again. She was happy for him, he'd gone as stir crazy as she had, and he'd been waffling back and forth on the border of batshit bored for weeks. But his return to work was another layer of "normal" that hid the stark fear that was now the base of her everyday life.
The front door opened wide, and Talia came through, her chair whirring. She showed up often once the lunch crowd was gone, when she could leave the crew at the bakery and head here. It was the right time for the bar, too, when Tierney would have time to chat and not just throw food at her and yell it was nice to see her a
s she whizzed by. She rolled her way down the street and the door opening wide to let the chair through always made Tierney feel better.
Tierney smiled at her best friend but didn't push her to move faster as she made her way to the bar. This was the best time for the chair not to have to fight general bar traffic, too. But Tierney did order up a grilled roast beef and cheddar on rye before Talia even made it to her barstool.
Tierney topped off a lemonade as Talia carefully handed over two tall cakes—one peach and one chocolate.
"Oh yes!" Tierney traded the drink for the cakes as she sniffed at the air. Technically this was a business delivery, but she loved Talia's style. It was great that her friend came into the bar all the time even though she didn't drink. For a short while, Tierney's day actually felt normal, like easy times when she didn’t have a constant cloud over her head.
Talia chatted her way through her sandwich and then stood up, aiming back toward her chair. "I've got to get back to the shop. No one wants cupcakes anymore in the cold. It's all hot pies, and they're more time consuming."
As per their usual song and dance, Tierney spoke up. "Can I pay you for the cakes?"
Snafu was going to sell them by the piece.
"Nope! I just got a free meal. And it's advertising," Talia grinned.
The sandwich Tierney had handed over wasn't worth anywhere near as much as the two cakes. They'd be gone before the dinner rush was halfway through. Tierney would send those who missed out down the street to get their own at Baby Cakes.
"No worries!" Talia called back as she whirred her way toward the door. It opened before she got there, Elliot Vander clef walking through.
He smiled at Tierney and waved to her as though he were an old loyal customer.
"Oh!" Talia's chair stopped and her head snapped around, darting to Tierney. The smile she plastered in place wouldn't pass even the simplest test. There was no mistake that Talia recognized this man.
Down in Flames (Wildfire Hearts Book 5) Page 19
