by Jenny Frame
The housekeeper opened the door. “Morning, Miss Holly.”
“Hi, could I speak to Queen Beatrice please?”
“Of course, they’re in the kitchen. Follow me.”
When she walked into the large ranch kitchen, she found the sweet domestic scene of a family breakfast. George had Teddy on her knee, and was feeding her bits of toast, and Bea was making some coffee. Bea smiled when she saw her.
“Holls, come in and have coffee.”
Holly curtsied to George and said, “Morning, Your Majesty. I’m sorry to interrupt you both.”
“Not a bit of it.” George wiped Teddy’s mouth with a napkin and said, “Teddy and I were just off to feed the horses. We’ll leave you two to chat.”
“Horsey, Mum,” Teddy said.
George lifted Teddy up into her arms and said to Bea, “Do you have the bag ready, Mummy?”
Bea lifted a cloth bag from the kitchen counter and handed it over. “Apples, carrots, and a bag of sugar lumps. The horses will love that.”
Bea kissed her daughter and then gave George a lingering kiss. “Be good—both of you.”
“Will do. Let’s go, Teddy bear.” George strode out and Bea gave a big happy sigh.
“You look a happy woman,” Holly said to her.
“I am.” Bea brought over the coffee and told Holly to sit. “This was the best idea ever. A whole week, just me, George, and Teddy, no servants, no officials knocking at our door at any time of the day or night. I can just be a wife and a mummy.”
Holly knew the strain not living a normal life put on her friend. She was such a free spirit, and being in the gilded cage alongside George was hard, even harder since Teddy came along.
“I’m happy for you, Bea.” Holly sat down gingerly and groaned.
“Saddle sore?” Bea said while pouring her coffee.
“Just a bit. I don’t know how I’m ever going to go on this picnic at the end of the week, but I promised Quin.”
“And that’s important to you?” Bea said.
“Yes. I don’t want to let her down. She might look like this tall, strapping, tough soldier, but deep down she’s really quite sensitive.” Holly didn’t want to mention Quincy’s nightmares, that was too private, and she wouldn’t break her confidence.
“You really care about her, don’t you,” Bea said.
Holly took a sip of her coffee, as if that would give her the courage to say the words out loud. “I think I might be falling for her, but—”
Bea clapped her hands together with glee. “Yes, I knew it. Aren’t I always right? Wait, what’s the but?”
“Well, it’s going to sound stupid now, but after one of the first times I’d argued with Quin, I went to confront her.”
“And?” Bea wasn’t following her.
“I was frustrated because she wouldn’t be angry, annoyed, show any emotion or anything, so I kissed her on a whim.”
“You kissed her?” Bea laughed.
“Yeah, it was out of anger and stupid, and afterwards we just pretended it never happened,” Holly said.
“But you’ve talked about it since?” Bea asked.
“Last night, that’s the thing. I was cutting her hair—”
Bea slammed down her cup in surprise. “Wait, Quincy let you touch her regulation hair?”
Holly nodded, and Bea blew out a breath. “She must care about you.”
“The thing is, she told me that stupid, done in anger, joke kiss was her first ever.”
“Aw, how sweet!” Bea grinned.
“It stopped me in my tracks. I mean, I’ve had more experience with women than her, and maybe I’ll be the first of many. I was in love once and got my heart broken. I’m older and ready to settle down, and I don’t want to play around.”
“Holls, Quincy is straight as a die, in a nonsexual sense. Does she seem like someone who would play with you for a bit, then move on?”
Holly took another sip of coffee and said, “If she was Story St. John, yes, but Quincy, no. Then again, who knows? She’s kept her emotions locked up for so long, who knows what she will feel when she explores her sexuality? I’d be her first.”
“First and last, I would say. Let me tell you a secret no one else knows.”
“What?” Holly inched closer.
“I’m George’s first, and only. She never so much as kissed a woman before I met her. She got it right the first time when she picked me,” Bea said quietly.
“Wow, you’re George’s one and only?” Holly allowed herself to think that maybe this could work.
Bea took her hand and said, “Maybe you are just Captain Quincy’s one?”
***
For the rest of the week, Holly spent all her time with Quincy, trying to gauge if Quincy really wanted what was growing between them. On Friday, after nearly a week of basic training in riding, Holly had promised to ride a trail to a nearby lake for a picnic with Quincy. Her riding hadn’t improved a great deal, but enough so she could go on a short ride. So Quincy said, but Holly was still scared of the prospect.
Holly checked her appearance in the mirror in her bedroom. The jodhpurs one of the female stable hands gave her were just tight enough to catch Quincy’s attention. She smiled, remembering catching Quincy looking at her bum a few times during their riding lessons.
She was determined today they would talk about what was between them, and if Quincy was slow on the uptake, she would just need to kiss her and ruffle her feathers.
“Are you ready to go, Holly?” Quincy shouted upstairs. Holly knew she had been waiting for a while.
“Just coming,” Holly shouted back.
“I’ll go and get the horses saddled up. Could you bring my wallet? I left it in my bedside table,” Quincy said.
“Okay, see you soon.” Holly walked next door to Quincy’s bedroom and chuckled when she saw how tidy it was. She quickly opened her bedside table and lifted Quincy’s wallet. Underneath was a neatly folded piece of paper with her name written on it.
Holly knew she was invading Quincy’s privacy, but she just couldn’t not look at it. She sat on Quincy’s bed, opened up the piece of paper, and started to read.
Sometimes when I look at you, I stop breathing and wish I could be the one who makes you smile and laugh, but how can I be that for you when I can’t feel? If I let myself feel, I would—well, I don’t know what I would become, but it is terrifying to me.
When Holly finished reading, she lowered the letter. “Bloody hell.”
***
“Holly, relax. You’re doing fine,” Quincy said.
Holly was holding on to the reins with a death grip, and her thighs were gripping her horse like steel.
“We’re not riding far, are we?” Holly said.
“Not too far. Don’t worry.” Quincy was leading them down a wooded forest trail that led to a lake. It was only a fifteen minute ride usually, but with the slow pace they were doing, it would take a lot longer.
“I’m really proud of you, Holly. You’ve faced your fear.”
“It’s worth it to spend time with you, Quin.” Holly managed a smile through her tension.
That meant so much to Quincy. Holly was doing this just to spend time with her, boring Captain Quincy? Quincy’s heart thudded with new feelings of love and hope, something she hadn’t felt in…she couldn’t think when. All because of Holly Weaver.
They rode on through the woods until they came to a small clearing. “We’re here. I’ll get you down.”
Quincy jumped down from her horse with ease and tethered it to a tree next to some grass, then went to Holly. Her knuckles were white from holding the reins so tightly.
“I hate this bit, Quin,” Holly said.
Quincy stroked Holly’s horse to keep her calm. “You only have to slip your leg over, and then slide. I’ll catch you, I promise.”
Holly closed her eyes. “I can’t. It was different at the stables. I don’t like this.”
Quincy reached her arms up to her. “J
ust slip one leg over, and I’ll catch you. You trust me, don’t you?”
Holly opened her eyes and looked at her. “Yes.”
“Okay, then. Hold Honey’s mane and slide your leg over. I promise I won’t let you fall.”
After a few false starts, Holly finally slid her leg around, then started to panic. “I’m going to fall, I’m going to fall.”
“No, you’re not.” Quincy put her hands on Holly’s hips. “Can you feel my hands?”
“Yes,” Holly squeaked.
“I’ve got ahold of you, so just slide into my arms.” Quincy stepped as close as she could, and Holly inched down her body slowly.
Quincy felt slightly guilty about the feelings Holly’s body was inciting in her, since she was so scared. But when Holly’s backside slid into her groin, it lit a heat inside of her. Holly was on the ground now, but neither moved. Their bodies were tightly pressed together, and Quincy kept her hands on Holly’s hips. She had an insatiable urge to pull Holly even tighter into her groin.
“I feel safe now.” Holly moved her head back so that her hair was brushing Quincy’s cheek.
Quincy closed her eyes and pressed her nose into Holly’s soft hair. When she felt Holly press her bottom back into her, she snapped out of her lustful daze. “Um…I’ll see to the horses if you want to walk down to the shore.”
Holly smiled teasingly. “All right, Stompy.”
***
Quincy showed her how to build a fire, and she helped light it by getting down low on the ground and blowing on the tinder. It was exciting to see the fire burst into life.
They got the tea on the fire and started to eat their picnic. Holly was fascinated by the flames dancing in the fire. She didn’t think she’d ever been so content, sitting here on a log by a lake, with a cup of tea, next to Quincy. That was the best part. It was funny. Even though Quincy was much more relaxed, she still didn’t say much, but that didn’t matter because her body was relaxed, and her whole demeanour was different. Being talkative just wasn’t her way.
The only way she was able to express herself was in the letter she had found.
Wait. Had Quincy left that letter visible, so she would find it and read it? It was strange that she’d forgotten her wallet. Quincy always remembered and planned for everything.
“Do you want more tea?” Quincy asked.
“No, I’m fine,” Holly said.
She saw Quincy tap her fingers against her tin teacup, as if she was nervous.
“Holly?” Quincy cleared her throat. “Have you ever been in love?”
Holly nearly spat out her mouthful of tea. “My God, Quincy, you stay silent all this time, and then open with that?”
Quincy looked down at the pebbled ground. “We are trained in the military to only give and receive the important information.”
“That’s an important piece of information to you?” Holly said.
Quincy threw the rest of her tea on the ground and stood. “It doesn’t matter. Let’s get packed up.”
Holly grasped her shirt and pulled. “Hey, sit down. This date isn’t finished yet. I learned to ride—well, not ride, but survive riding on a horse for you, so sit.”
Quincy appeared surprised by her reprimand but sat back down. “I’m sorry if it’s personal. I’m just interested.”
“Why?” Holly pushed her. She wanted to see if she could get Quincy to tell her how she felt.
Finally Quincy looked her straight in the eyes and said, “I wanted to know how a beautiful, vibrant, fun-loving woman like you wasn’t in a relationship like your friends Queen Beatrice and Lali.”
“I haven’t wanted to fall in love for a long time. My first love broke my heart, as I told you.” Holly gave her a brave smile.
Quincy narrowed her eyes. “What did she do?”
“We were at high school together, went to the same university, and made all these plans for our future—but one day she told me she’d met someone else, and my world fell apart. You know what she told me? Let me go and make me miss you, and then we could maybe have another chance someday.”
“Bloody fool. She really said that?” Quincy asked.
Holly nodded. “Yep. She really said that. You know, sometimes I wish I could grab my younger self and give myself a shake for even shedding a tear over her.”
“What did you say to her?” Quincy asked.
“With tears rolling down my face, I told her to shove it up her arse and walked off.”
Quincy burst out laughing, which was rare for her. “Good for you.”
“Yeah, I might have been a fool in love, but I wasn’t an idiot. After that I didn’t want to feel that way again. So dependent on someone, so out of control. I mostly dated men and tried to live up to my man-eater reputation.”
Quincy unexpectedly took her hand and said, “She wasn’t worthy of you.”
Holly looked down shyly. “I don’t know about that.”
The conversation stopped there as if both of them were scared of saying what was quite obviously hanging between them. Holly was trying to build up the courage to tell Quincy how she felt when Quincy stood up.
“We better get the horses back to the stables.”
Shit. You’ve lost your chance, Holls. She got up and watched as Quincy very carefully doused the fire and made it safe.
Holly followed her up to the bank of the lake and Quincy offered her hand. When she took it, she knew this would be her last chance. When they got back they were having dinner with their friends.
“Quin?”
Quincy turned around. “Yes?”
“I wanted to thank you for today before we get back.” Holly moved closer and pulled Quincy to her by grasping her shirt.
And then they were kissing.
“Are you kissing me because you want to ruffle me up again?” Quincy pulled back and asked. Quincy was surprised at first, but then she began to kiss Holly back. She’d wanted to feel Holly’s lips again so badly, and now she had them.
Holly traced her finger across her lips. “No, I’m kissing you because I needed to. I needed to taste you and see if it felt as good as the last time.”
“And did it?” Quincy asked.
Holly nodded. “Oh yes.”
Quincy moved in to kiss her. She couldn’t get enough of the taste of Holly. Their kiss became passionate, and Quincy walked them back against the tree behind them.
Quincy’s barely restrained passion was pouring out and she couldn’t stop. She ran her fingers through Holly’s hair. She’d been dreaming of doing that practically since she met her.
Holly held on tight around her neck, and Quincy ran her tongue along Holly’s lips and inside her mouth. She tasted with her tongue and lips, the way she wished she could have the first time.
After a life of trying not to get involved with her feelings, Quincy was now revelling in them.
Holly grasped Quincy’s hands and put them around her waist. Quincy didn’t hesitate to slip them under the hem of Holly’s T-shirt and stroked her bare skin. Holly moaned into the kiss, and Quincy pulled their hips together, desperately seeking relief from the tension that was throbbing inside of her.
They finally had to break apart to breathe, and Holly said breathily, “You’re good at that. You sure you have never done that before?”
“No. Never. I’ve never needed or wanted to, until you.”
“Wow, you really are one of a kind. A girl’s dream,” Holly said.
Quincy suddenly felt an anxious fear deep inside of her. She knew if she ever made love with Holly, she would disarm her and demand that nothing be held back, and Quincy didn’t know if she was brave enough for that. Yet.
The horses picked that moment to start fussing, and Quincy took the opportunity to press pause. “We’d better get the horses back.”
Quincy could see a look of disappointment in Holly’s eyes.
Chapter Nineteen
When they got back to the pool house they had to get ready for dinner with their fri
ends, so Holly couldn’t get Quincy to talk about what had happened between them again. The longer they didn’t mention it, the more awkward it got, plus Bea and Lali weren’t exactly subtle over dinner in their encouragement for them to get together, which made things more awkward.
They got back to the pool house after a silent walk from the ranch house. It was as if after showing all the emotion and passion, Quincy was a little bit scared. Holly knew painting her model soldiers always brought calm to Quincy, so she suggested spending the rest of their evening painting.
Holly sat cross-legged on the couch next to Quincy, who had relaxed a good deal.
“I’m getting better at the faces,” Holly said, holding up her soldier.
Quincy smiled. “So you are.”
“I had a great day today, Quincy. Thanks for making it special. Teaching me to stay on a horse was a great feat.”
Quincy said seriously, “I had the best day I’ve ever had.”
Holly looked up and met Quincy’s eyes. She didn’t know quite how to respond to that. “Thank you.”
Then out of the blue Quincy said, “Helen told me not to feel guilty for having a good time with you.”
Holly took her hand. “Jacob’s wife?”
Quincy nodded and turned her gaze back to her soldier. Holly wondered of Quincy needed to talk about this before they could explore what they felt, because whatever had happened weighed Quincy down like a stone.
“What happened to Jacob?”
Quincy looked up, and then the walls behind her eyes began to shut, so Holly quickly grasped her hand. “Don’t run away from this. Tell me what happened, and then you’ll be free of it.”
Quincy pulled her hand back, got up, and said angrily, “I’ll never be free of it.”
Holly tried to keep calm. She had to show Quincy she wasn’t going to be scared off the subject. “I care about you, Quin. Nothing you say is going to change that. Come and sit down.”
