by Maine, Miley
Now, I don’t know if the same can be said for Rebecca’s friends since Maggie has never been keen on me, but this isn’t high school. It doesn’t really matter what our friends want, this is about us.
“I am going to make the best of this,” I say, half as a promise to myself add half as a promise to Rebecca, not that she listening to me. “I’m going to make every day amazing.”
I keep thinking about what Rebecca and I talked about last night when we were discussing the future. She mentioned marriage... well, I mentioned it first in a roundabout way, not that it was my main intention, and now all I can think about is another wedding.
She’s right, we don’t need another big fancy event because it was hard work last time, not a lot of fun for us, because we were so busy trying to make sure that everyone else was happy. If we’re going to do it again, then it will be a different story. It will be a special romantic event just for me and Rebecca. Oh, and Jenny too because I’m pretty sure she isn’t going to let us get married without being involved.
I would love nothing more than to call her my wife again. I didn’t ever want to stop calling her that, and although it might seem that we’re moving quickly considering all the drama we have been through, we are all in. We are in this for the long haul, we have been married before, so why not be married again?
With that thought in mind, I sneak out of bed, trying my hardest not to wake Rebecca up, and I grab my clothes quickly. As I pull them on, I rush into the bedroom to check on Jenny, who thankfully is still asleep as well, which gives me the time and space to leave for the moment.
I know that Rebecca said she didn’t want a romantic proposal, and I don’t think that I should go all out like I did before, but this isn’t us returning to our old marriage where I had secrets, this is going to be a new start for us, a fresh beginning, and the best way to symbolize that is with a new ring. An engagement ring, or a promise ring, letting her know that this is for real and that I will do everything I can for her in the future.
My pulse races as I exit the house as quietly as I can, so as not to disturb anyone. The moment the door clicks behind me, I smile like a madman, not even caring who is looking at me...
To be honest, the only people out this early in the morning on New Year’s Day are dog walkers, very dedicated joggers, and people doing the walk of shame. I’m the least interesting person walking the streets.
It takes me a while to find any jewelry stores open, but luckily there will always be someone happy to make some cash no matter what the day is. I find a really cute ring store with some unique pieces to offer.
“Do you know what you’re looking for?” The girl behind the counter asks me. “Because I’m here if you need any advice.”
“I’m looking for an engagement ring,” I tell her eagerly. “But this isn’t my first time doing it.”
“Oh.” I suddenly realized the sounds when she gives me a look of horror. “I see, so you have been engaged before. How many times?”
“Only once... to the woman I am proposing to today. Things got off track, but we are getting back together again.”
She stares at me like I have lost my mind. I think my story has made her regret talking to me at all. It probably sounds insane, I’m sure this isn’t the idea of being sorry to anybody else, but for me and Rebecca, it is perfect. This time around we have learned from my mistakes and it will be better. I have full faith in us. I know that we can make it work. No one else has to see what I do, Rebecca and I understanding how we work is enough.
“Anyway, I know what I want.” I point to that ring now eager to get out of here. “That’s the perfect ring for us, thank you very much.”
She places the ring in a box and hand it to me quickly, keen to get me out. I’m sure she assumed that this is a hangover or drunken mistake and I’ll be trying to return the ring as soon as I realize what I’ve done. But that is not what’s happening here.
I clutch the bag tightly to me as I leave the store, wanting to keep the ring close to my heart as I carry it back to Rebecca. I don’t really have a plan for when I get home, I’m not sure what I’m going to say, but I’m not going to think about it. When the time comes, I will just speak from the heart...
Although, going in without a plan seems less of a good idea the closer I get to the house. I half wonder if I should walk a lap around to try and get some words in my head. I almost do it as well, until I noticed the light on in the living room. Rebecca and Jenny are up, probably wondering where the hell I am.
“Shit.” I grab my key quickly. “So much for the surprise.”
But as I head inside and I inhale the lovely smell of bacon, I realize that Rebecca hasn’t exactly been worried about me, she hasn’t been calling the cops filing a missing person’s report, she’s been cooking breakfast.
“Hello?” I call out almost with amusement. “Rebecca? Jenny?”
Of course, it’s my daughter who rushes to my side first. “Daddy, guess what? We made you breakfast.”
“You did? Why did you do that? That’s very nice of you.”
“Mommy wanted to do something nice for you. She said you deserve it.”
Oh my God, it isn’t just me trying to make things right again, I’m not the only one putting in effort, she’s doing it as well. This is incredible. If we’re both fighting for the same thing and aiming towards the same goal, there’s no way we can’t achieve it.
Jenny grabs my hand and takes me in to the kitchen where the smell of food nearly overwhelms me.
“Do you need a hand? Do you want me to do anything?” I ask, not really thinking that I can’t do anything because I have this very important thing in my hands.
“No, I’m fine,” Rebecca replies in a hurry. “You guys take a seat; everything will be done in a moment.”
Jenny and I do as she commands, but I don’t stay in my seat for long. I can’t sit still because I’m so excited. I pace up and down, trying to decide when would be the best time to do it. I’m struggling to work out whether planning is a good thing or not. I think a bit of planning and a bit of going with the flow is the perfect combination... at least, I’m about to find out if that’s the case.
“Are you okay?” Rebecca asks me curiously as she brings in the plates of food. “You look weird.”
I smile and nod but don’t say anything until she has left the plates on the table there’s no chance of her dropping the bacon and pancakes all over the floor. Then once she has nothing in her hands, and she turns to face me in her oversized black tee shirt, her hair up in a messy bun, and not a scrap of makeup on her beautiful face, the moment feels perfect.
I drop to one knee, I pull the ring box out of the bag, and I pop it open to show her the diamond encrusted band I have inside.
“Oh my God,” she gasps as she claps her hands to her mouth. “I thought we were joking... I didn’t mean you had to... what is going on here, Taylor?”
“Rebecca, you agreed to marry me once before, and I wasn’t the best husband to you. I wasn’t the man you deserved. But I have learned my lesson now and I want a second try if you will let me. I want to prove to you that I can make you the happiest woman alive, and I will really do it this time, I promise you. You and Jenny are the most important people to me, and I will always put you and your needs first. I will never keep anything from you again, and I will always communicate with you like I promised. But none of this feels right unless you’re my wife. The last year has been horrible without you, I have barely been able to cope. I don’t want to go through another year without having you with me forever. So please... please give me another chance... Please agree to be my wife again.”
“Wow.” she’s in floods of tears all over again. “I can’t believe you did this; you really are something else.”
“Mommy.” Jenny tugs on her tee shirt. “Say yes, Mommy. I want you and Daddy to get married again. You will look like a princess; I can be a bridesmaid.”
“Oh, Jenny, of course I’m going to say yes.
I would love nothing more.”
“So, say yes then,” I insist. “If we are going to do this right, then we both need to do it perfectly.”
She holds out a hand to me and wiggles her naked ring finger which really doesn’t look right. I much prefer that gorgeous figure of hers when it’s claimed by me. I can’t wait to have a ring of my own on my finger as well, letting the world know that I am hers.
“Yes,” she replies eagerly. “Of course, I will marry you. I will marry you whenever you want me to.”
I slip the ring on to her, before jumping up to hold her in my arms and hug her as she becomes my fiancée again. This time everything is a lot more intense and it feels a lot more real. This time I know we are both committed to making this the best future we could possibly have.
I can’t wait.
33
Rebecca
January 2nd
January 2nd. What an important date for this family. The day that I am supposed to have Jenny back, putting an end to Taylor’s ten days with his daughter. It’s when we are supposed to go back to every other weekend, just like we used to... but we can’t go back now because everything is different. Now as I look across the breakfast table and I see the man who I am engaged to for the second time, and our beautiful child happy as anything, I don’t know where we’re going to go next. What is our next move?
“Huh, look at that,” Taylor comments pointing towards the calendar. “I just noticed the date. This is the day that everything comes to an end, isn’t it?”
“What?” Jenny looks utterly horrified. “I thought that you were going to get married. I didn’t know that we were going back to our old house. Mommy, I’m confused.”
“Oh, sorry darling.” Taylor takes Jenny’s hand. “I didn’t mean to upset you; it was just a joke. I wasn’t thinking. You guys aren’t going anywhere. I’m never letting either of you go again.”
“You mean I’m going to stay here? Forever?” Her eyes light up with excitement. “I like this house. I would like to stay here.”
Those words make my chest tighten up a little. I wasn’t considering that as an option. I don’t know what I thought was going to happen though really. I haven’t really thought about it. I’ve been so wrapped up in everything, that I haven’t had time to work out where we go from here.
“But what about our house, sweetheart?” I ask her with concern. “Do you like it at our place?”
“I do, but that’s our old house isn’t it? This is new.”
I stare at Taylor to try and see what he thinks about this, but he simply shrugs at me and smiles as if the choice is up to me. But I don’t know what the hell we should do. I don’t know what I want at all. I feel like I’ll be happy anywhere.
Our old house has a lot of memories, we built a life there, we went through a lot together. It would be a shame to say goodbye to all of that, to put it behind us and never look back again, because if we did move out, I wouldn’t ever want to go back again. Moving home is exhausting and I wouldn’t want to do it more than the one time. If we ever came here, then here is where I want to stay...
But would I want to live in this house? It’s lovely and there’s much more space than we had before, but I didn’t come here planning to stay permanently. It was only supposed to be for ten days...
But the way that Taylor is looking at me, I know he would be happy to make this place our home forever.
“Err... I don’t know,” I answer honestly. “I don’t know where to go. I’m not sure what to do now. I can’t make that decision. Someone else is going to have to do it for me.”
I stare at Taylor, basically begging him to decide on our behalf, but he doesn’t.
“Jenny, I think you should decide,” he says instead. “Your Mommy and I can’t do it.”
“It’s up to me?” she looks utterly delighted. “I can make the choice?”
“Yes,” he tells her decidedly. “What do you think, Rebecca?”
I can’t believe we’re doing this, really leaving the choice of where we live to our five year old daughter, it seems absolutely crazy... but then again, if we can’t make a decision, and our choices haven’t always been smart, then why the hell not?
“Sure. You go for it, Jenny. Tell us where you would prefer to live.”
It’s tense while waiting for her. Jenny agonizes over this for what feels like hours. I can’t keep my eyes off Taylor the entire time. In the end he starts laughing and I can’t help but join in. This is nuts, but then again why not let our lives be nuts?
“I know what I want,” Jenny finally announces. “I think we need to move to the new house because it’s new, we need it to be new.”
Weirdly, through all of that madness, I think I understand exactly what she means. In her little five-year-old way, she is suggesting that we all have a fresh start. Much as it’s going to scare me to leave our old house and our old lives behind, not all the memories are nice ones back in the old house. In fact, there are some pretty awful memories including the divorce and the years of living there alone. Perhaps coming to this place where we can create a whole bunch of new memories is perfect for us.
“Okay.” I nod in agreement. “Let’s do it. Let’s move.” God, it feels utterly freeing to say that. Much better than I thought it would to be honest. I really like the idea of starting again now. “Let’s move to this house and start again. We could even go and get some of our things today and start transferring everything over. Oh, but Taylor, what are we going to do with the old house?”
“Well, there are lots of things we could do. We could sell it, rent it out, keep it for Jenny when she’s older... Whatever you want. But we don’t need to make the decision now, do we? We have all the time in the world to make these sorts of choices.”
All the time in the world... What could be more perfect than that?
“Well, should we go and get some things then? I’m pretty keen to get moving now.” I smile at Jenny. “I bet you feel the same, don’t you?”
She gives me a blank look back, but I suppose it doesn’t make any difference to her. She has just as many things here as she does at our house, so Jenny is fine wherever she is. It’s me who’s going to need everything moved over to really feel settled.
“I don’t think you should do it today,” Taylor says with a mysterious determination to his voice. “We might have other things to do today.”
“Other things?” I cock my head to one side curiously. “You sound like you have a plan. What are you talking about?”
Why is he just looking at me? Why isn’t he telling me what he’s thinking about? It’s unnerving me, causing nervous butterflies to flap violently the pit of my stomach.
“Taylor, what’s going on? You’re freaking me out here.”
He grins widely from ear to ear, but still doesn’t give anything away. I can’t imagine what it could possibly be. What surprise is bigger than proposing? I’d like to think nothing, but the look on Taylor’s face suggest otherwise.
“What’s that, Daddy?” He and I have been too involved in looking at each other we haven’t even noticed Jenny climbing under the table. When she reappears, she has something in her hand which she waves in the air. “I found this on the floor. You dropped it.”
He instantly tries to snatch it back from her, which tells me it has something to do with my surprise. But I don’t need to fight for it because Jenny is running, not letting Taylor get it. All I need to do is look back and laugh, while I watch the scene unfold.
“Give it back!” Taylor calls out, but he isn’t annoyed, he’s laughing. “I need that. I have to give it to Mommy.”
Eventually he manages to get it back from Jenny and he hands it to me. But it takes me a couple of moments to work out exactly what I’m looking at, and even longer to connect all the dots. This is why we don’t need to get our stuff moved in today, this is his plan.
“Are you for real?” I stare at him in shock. “Is this really what we’re doing today?”
&nb
sp; “It sure is. I organized it last night while you were asleep. You really are a deep sleeper. You should work on that.”
“Such a deep sleeper that you can wake up and book plane tickets for all of us? That’s insane.”
I jump up and throw my arms around him, hugging him tightly, holding him close to me.
“These surprises are a bit much, Taylor. You can’t just throw a surprise vacation on me when I don’t have anything prepared for it.”
“You only need to pack a bag,” he laughs. “We aren’t going forever. You have enough stuff here for that. And I will buy you whatever you want when we get there. I will buy you anything you need.”
How can I not be over the moon with all of this? He really is trying this time around. He really is doing everything he can to make me feel special and loved. I can see in Taylor’s eyes that we will never have the issue of him lying to me again. Nor will I do anything to hurt him either.
“So, the flight is this afternoon, huh?” I wiggle my eyebrows at him. “I need to get packed. So does Jenny. We don’t have a lot of time...” I start to walk away but turn back to glance at him over my shoulder for just a moment. “Do we have any plans? Is there anything in particular we are going to do?”
The cheeky smile on his face makes my heart flutter. I feel like I already know where this vacation is going to take us, but I want to hear it from him. I want him to say the words out loud, so I am certain.
“It’s Las Vegas, isn’t it?” he shoots a wink at me. “What normally happens in Vegas?” I offer him a one shouldered shrug, not giving away how much I have figured out. “Well, you wanted our second wedding to be private, and small, and just for us... So, why not find a little chapel? I’ll get you a wedding dress, I will buy Jenny a little bridesmaid dress...” Of course, that gets an extreme reaction from Jenny because this is what she wants more than anything in the world. “We are going to have a lovely vacation where we come back married. Together again and about to move into our new house together... What a way to start the new year.”
