IV.
BURLESQUE OF FAERIE.
As Planche was, in effect, the Father of Classical Burlesque, so was healso, even more irrefragably, the Father of the Burlesque of Faerie--ofthe fairy tales of the nursery, and especially of those derived fromFrench sources. Memorable, indeed, was the production of Planche's"Riquet with the Tuft[18]"; this piece was the precursor of somethinglike twenty others from the same pen, all written on the same principleand in the same vein. Planche had been to Paris, and had there seenPotier playing in "Riquet a la Houppe." He came home and straightwaywrote his own version of the story, partly in verse, partly in prose,having in Charles Mathews a Riquet not equal indeed to Potier, but withobvious merits of his own. Vestris was the Princess Emeralda, and JamesBland Green Horn the Great--Rebecca Isaacs, then only a little girl,being the Mother Bunch. The result was complete success, carrying withit great encouragement to the dramatist to persevere in the new path onwhich he had entered.
[18] At the Olympic in 1836.
These fairy pieces of Planche's were not burlesques quite in the sensein which his classical pieces were, but they belong, nevertheless,to the burlesque _genre_. Each treats lightly and humorously a storyalready in existence; each includes parodies of popular lyrics, as wellas songs written to the airs of popular ditties; and the burlesquespirit animates the whole. Every now and then, the writer, risingsuperior to parody, produces a lyric which has a definite accent of itsown. Here, for example, in "Riquet with the Tuft," is a song accordedto the grotesque and misshapen hero. It has genuine wit as well asgenial philosophy:--
I'm a strange-looking person, I am, But contentment for ever my guest is; I'm by habit an optimist grown, And fancy that all for the best is. Each man has of troubles his pack, And some round their aching hearts wear it; My burden is placed on my back, Where I'm much better able to bear it.
Again, tho' I'm blind of one eye, And have but one ear that of use is, I but half the world's wickedness spy, And am deaf to one half its abuses; And tho' with this odd pair of pegs, My motions I own serpentine are, Many folks blest with handsomer legs Have ways much more crooked than mine are!
Nature gave me but one tuft of hair, Yet wherefore, kind dame, should I flout her? If one side of my head must be bare, I'm delighted she's chosen the outer! Thus on all things I put a good face, And however misshapen in feature, My heart, girl, is in the right place, And warms towards each fellow-creature!
The origin of "Riquet with the Tuft" is to be found in Perrault's"Contes de ma Mere l'Oye." Planche went to the same source for his"Puss in Boots: an original, comical, _mews_-ical fairy burletta"(Olympic, 1837), in which Charles Mathews was an incomparable Puss,with Bland as Pumpkin the Prodigious, Vestris as the Marquis ofCarabas, and Brougham as a very Irish ogre. In this there was a gooddeal of prose dialogue, of which the following scene between Puss andthe three maids-of-honour may be taken as a diverting specimen:--
_Chatterina._ You're in the army, I presume?
_Puss._ No, ma'am.
_Chatt._ Why, you wear moustaches.
_Puss._ Yes, ma'am, yes; but that's because--because I can't help it, you see. I belong to a club, and all the members are obliged to wear them.
_Chatt._ What club?
_Puss._ It's a sort of Catch Club.
_Arietta._ What, musical?
_Puss._ Very.
_Ari._ And where do you meet?
_Puss._ We meet alternately upon each other's roof.
_Skipperella._ _Upon_ each other's roof?--that's quite a new step.
_Puss._ I beg pardon, did I say _upon_? I meant _under_.
_Ari._ You can sing, then?
_Puss._ I can squall a little, _a la_ Cat-oni.
_Ari._ Who taught you?
_Puss._ Cat-alani.
_Skip._ And dance, too?
_Puss._ I remember the time when I would have run anywhere after a ball.
_Skip._ What is your favourite dance?
_Puss._ The Cat-alonian Cat-choucha.
_Chat._ Well, never mind about singing and dancing; suppose we fix upon some game to pass away the time, at which we can all play?
_Ari._ I'm content.
_Skip._ And I.
_Puss._ And I. What shall it be?
_Chat._ "Puss in the Corner."
_Puss._ No, no, I don't like that.
_Chat._ Choose one yourself, then.
_Puss._ My favourite game is "Cat's Cradle."
_All._ Oh no, we can't bear that!
_Chat._ Come, name another from your catalogue.
_Puss_ (_aside_). Cat-alogue! They grow personal!
The subject of "Puss in Boots" was afterwards handled by H. J.Byron.[19] In this case we find the monarch of the piece calledNoodlehead IX.; the Princesses are named Biddi, Coobiddi, andChickabiddi; and there are two woodcutters called Gnarl and Knot. Thepuns in the dialogue on the word _cat_ are even more numerous than inthe older piece, and somewhat more varied. As thus:--
[19] At the Strand in 1862, with Rogers, Clarke, Miss A. Swanborough, Miss C. Saunders, Miss F. Josephs, and Miss F. Hughes in the principal parts. The full title of the piece was "Puss in a New Pair of Boots."
_Will._ What! left his youngest child, a cat!
_Bob._ It's true.
_Will._ Well, that's a _feline_ sort of thing to do.
Again:--
_Cat._ I am, as you perceive, sir, an I-_tale_-ian, But never scratch my friends, though I'm an n_ailey'un_; It's only foes that ever raise my fur.
_Will._ Well, really you're a charming _furry_-ner.
Once more:--
_Will._ What can you do?
_Cat._ My pictures folk applaud; They say they're scratchy, but resemble _Claude_. I'm not much of a linguist, my good friend, But I've a-_talion_ at my finger's end; I can't dance well amongst young ladies, yet I come out very well in a _puss-et._ I sing at times like any _cat-a-lani_.
_Will._ Your favourite opera is----
_Cat._ The _Purr_-itani.
In the course of the piece King Noodlehead sings a song in which somefun is made of the conventionalities of Italian opera:--
At the Opera, and at Covent Garden as well, I have always observed that the expiring swell, Tho' you'd fancy just there he'd be shortest of breath, Sings a difficult song just before his own death. Such as diddle, diddle, diddle, Chip chop ri chooral i day, That's how they arrange things at the Operay.
And I've likewise remarked that the young hero-ine Walks about in a low dress of thin white sat-in, Defying the fog, and the cold and the damp, And also rheumatics, and likewise the cramp. With a diddle, diddle, diddle, etc.
I've remarked that the peasants who come on the scene, Are, p'raps, awkward, but still most offensively clean, They lay monstrous stress on the "_whens_" and the "_whats_," And sing--"Oh, joy"--together like mere idi-ots. With a diddle, diddle, diddle, etc.
One of the prettiest and wittiest of Planche's adaptations fromPerrault's store was "The Sleeping Beauty in the Wood," seen at CoventGarden in 1840. The Beauty was the Princess Is-a-Belle--of course,Mme. Vestris; the inevitable King--Thomas Noddy of No-Land--wasthe inevitable Bland; James Vining was Prince Perfect; andBrougham was a woodcutter--one Larry O'Log. But the most whimsicalcharacter in the piece was played by Harley--the Baron Factotum,"Great-Grand-Lord-Everything," who may be compared with Pooh-Bah in Mr.Gilbert's "Mikado." In "The Mikado," Ko-Ko is "Lord High Executioner ofTitipu," and Pooh-Bah is "Lord High Everything Else"--he is "First Lordof the Treasury, Lord Chief Justice, Commander-in-Chief, Lord HighAdmiral, Master of the Buckhounds, Gr
oom of the Backstairs, Archbishopof Titipu, and Lord Mayor, both acting and elect, all rolled into one."The Baron Factotum is even more embarrassed with offices and duties. Ashe says at one juncture:--
I shall go crazy. Ye who sigh for place, Behold and profit by my piteous case. As Lord High Chamberlain, I slumber never; As Lord High Steward, in a stew I'm ever! As Lord High Constable, I watch all day; As Lord High Treasurer, I've the deuce to pay; As Great Grand Cupbearer, I'm handled queerly; As Great Grand Carver, I'm cut up severely. In other States the honours are divided, But here they're one and all to me confided; They've buckled Fortune on my back--until I really feel particularly ill! Young man, avoid the cares from State that spring, And don't you be a Great Grand anything.
He then sings, to the tune of "Where the bee sucks":--
Who would be a Great Grand Lord High, All the blame on him must lie; Everywhere for him they cry, Up and downstairs he must fly-- After all folks, verily! Verily, verily! Few would live now Under the honours beneath which I bow.
The programme of the "The Sleeping Beauty" bore the following notice:--
In strict accordance with the Modern School of Melodramatic Composition, Eighteen years are to be supposed to have elapsed between the First and Second Parts; One Hundred years between the Second and Third Parts; and considerably more than One Hundred after the piece is over.
Planche went again to Perrault--directly or indirectly-- for his "BlueBeard" (1839) and his "Discreet Princess" (1855). The last named (from"L'Adroite Princesse") was notable as including in its cast Robsonas Prince Richcraft, and Emery as Gander the Stupendous. In "BlueBeard" Bland played the Baron Abomelique (the hero), Mme. Vestris theheroine (Fleurette), and John Brougham, the actor-dramatist, an Irishcharacter--the O'Shac O'Back. How often has this fascinating subjectbeen dealt with since! Dozens of pantomimes have had it for a basis;the burlesques founded on it are not quite so numerous. The best knownare those by H. J. Byron (1860) and Mr. Burnand (1883); there are alsotwo others by H. T. Arden and Frank Green.
But it was to the "Contes des Fees" of Madame D'Aulnoy that Planchewas most largely indebted for his fairy stories. The list (extendingfrom 1842 to 1854) is quite an imposing one. First came "Fortunio, andhis Seven Gifted Servants," based on "Belle-Belle, ou le ChevalierFortune." Next, "The Invisible Prince, or the Island of TranquilDelights," taken from "Le Prince Lutin." "Le Rameau d'Or" suggested"The Golden Branch," and "The King of Peacocks"[20] had its originin "La Princesse Rosette." From "Le Serpentin Vert" was derived "TheIsland of Jewels"; from "L'Oiseau Bleu," "King Charming, or the BlueBird of Paradise"; from "La Grenouille Bienfaisante," "The Queen ofthe Frogs"; from "La Biche au Bois,"[21] "The Prince of Happy Land,or the Fawn in the Forest"; from "La Princesse Carpillon," "Once upona Time there were Two Kings"; and from "Le Nain Jeune," "The YellowDwarf and the King of the Gold Mines." "Beauty and the Beast" was takenfrom a tale by Mme. le Prince de Beaumont; but Planche claimed that thetreatment was wholly new. He had Vestris for his Beauty, Harrison thetenor for his Beast, and Bland for his Sir Aldgate Pump, the father ofBeauty. "The Good Woman in the Wood" was from a story by Mme. de laForce; and "Young and Handsome" from a faerie by the Countess de Murat."Graciosa and Percinet" likewise had a French origin.
[20] This, first played at the Lyceum in 1860, was afterwards revived at the St. James's with Miss Kate Terry as the Princess.
[21] Other versions of this tale have been written by Maddison Morton (at Drury Lane), and by Mr. Burnand (at the Holborn in 1868, under the title of "The White Fawn").
It was, however, in each case only for the fable that Planchehad to give thanks: everything else--even in most instances thenomenclature--was his own. And that nomenclature was often veryingenious and amusing. Thus, in "Fortunio," we have an impecuniousnoble called Baron Dunover (played by Morris Barnett). In "TheInvisible Prince" the name of the Queen of Allaquiz is Blouzabella;her son is the Infante Furibond;[22] and among her courtiers are theMarquis of Anysidos, Count Palava Torquemova (who introduces theambassadors), and Don Moustachez de Haro y Barbos (Captain of theGuard). In the same piece, the Princess of the Island of TranquilDelights is called Xquisitelittlepet, and her ladies in waiting areToxaloto-tittletattle and Itsaprettipetticoat. Soyez Tranquille (witha clever suggestion of Soyer) is the _chef de cuisine_ in "The King ofthe Peacocks," in which there is also an Irishman, The O'Don't KnowWho, and a German, the Baroness Von Huggermugger. Planche's kings andqueens have mostly comic names. There is Giltgingerbread the Great,with Tinsellina, his consort, in "The Island of Jewels." There isHenpeckt the Hundredth in "King Charming"; there is Fulminoso thePugnacious in "The Queen of the Frogs"; there is Periwigulus the Proudin "Once upon a Time there were Two Kings." Henpeckt, again, has avalet called Natty, and a porter called Nobby. Elsewhere we come acrossan usher named Antirumo, an Indian named Tan-tee-vee (of the tribe ofTal-hee-ho), and an evil genius named Abaddun. The Yellow Dwarf ischristened, very appropriately, Gambogie.[23]
[22] This part, originally played (in 1846) by James Bland, was played by Mr. Toole at the Adelphi in 1859, and afterwards by George Honey at the Princess's.
[23] The part of the Yellow Dwarf was first played (Olympic, 1854) by Robson, of whose performance Planche says that "So powerful was his personation of the cunning, the malignity, the passion and despair of the monster, that he elevated extravaganza into tragedy." At one point his delivery of the lines moved Thackeray almost to tears. "It is not a burlesque," he exclaimed: "it is an idyll."
"The Yellow Dwarf," it may here be chronicled, is the title of aburlesque by Gilbert Abbott a'Beckett and by Mr. Robert Reece;A'Beckett's being produced in 1842, Planche's in 1854, and Mr. Reece'sin 1882. "Beauty and the Beast" has been made the subject of travestieby Mr. Burnand. The "Fortunio" of Planche was also rivalled in the"Lady Belle Belle, or Fortunio and his Seven Magic Men" of H. J. Byron(Adelphi, 1863).[24] This last was in a thoroughly H. J. Byronic vein,with a Count Collywobbol among its characters and the usual supplyof puns and parodies. Here are a few of the best of the puns. ThePrincess Volante is a very Atalanta in her fondness for race running:--
[24] Byron was indebted to Mme. D'Aulnoy for the idea of his "Orange Tree and the Humble Bee, or The Little Princess who was Lost at Sea" (Vaudeville, 1871).
I'll run a race With any living ped, through wind or rain; Some like what's handsome--I prefer the _plain_. I have this morning run a spanking heat, Two miles in just ten minutes.
_King._ Wondrous _feat_!
_Prin._ Everything pedal has its charms for me. I'd have gone miles the great Miss _Foote_ to see. My tastes are visible e'en at my meals; My favourite fish, of course, are _soles_ and _eels_. Pota_toes_ I consider are _A-oners_, Though I've a preference for scarlet-_runners_. And when at children's parties I am present, I think a game at four-_feits_ very pleasant.
"The White Cat," by Planche (1842), has among its _personae_Wunsuponatyme, King of Neverminditsnamia; Prince Paragon; and Jingo, aCourt fool. In "The Fair One with the Golden Locks" (1843), the Kingis called Lachrymoso,[25] and the woman of the bedchamber Molly-mopsa.Finally, there is "The Seven Champions of Christendom" (1849), in whichCharles Mathews played Charles Wag, Esq., "in attendance on" St. Georgeof England. With this ends the list of Planche's compositions of thiskind--a remarkable contribution to the stage literature of wit andhumour.
[25] Lachrymoso was played by Mr. Toole at the Adelphi so recently as 1860.
From Planche's "Seven Champions of Christendom" to the "St. George andthe Dragon" of Gilbert Abbott a'Beckett (1845) and the "Sir Georgeand a Dragon, or We are Seven" of Mr. Burnand (1856) is a naturaland easy transition. In A'Beckett's piece, Kalyba, the sorceress, hasstolen St. George when a child, in order that he might fall in lovewith her, and so rescue her from prophesied destruction. Getting rid ofher with a wave of her own wand, he turns up with his fellow Championsat Memphis, where King Pt
olemy is in a state of impecuniosity, theDragon having swallowed up all his resources. The monster demands theKing's daughter Sabra, but St. George contrives to trick him out of thelegal securities he holds, and eventually destroys him by the powerof the steam press. There is a vein of allegory running through thepiece, which has, however, its share of _jeux de mots_. Thus, Kalyba'shandmaid says to her:--
Your hair, my lady, 's getting rather dry, Some of the Russian balsam shall I try?
_Kaly._ Well, p'raps you may--yet no--upon the whole, Anything Russian's hurtful to the _Pole_. The very thought my nervous system shocks, O! would that mine were like Chubb's--safety locks! Should I turn grey, I'd bid the world good-bye.
_Maid._ If you turn grey, it would be time to _dye_.
Elsewhere there is some sarcasm at the expense of the newspapers. St.George says to Sabra:--
These evening papers, blow the horn and cry them; Inviting every one to come and buy them. This is the way the sort of thing is done-- (_Crying_) Se-cond edition here! the _Memphis Sun_, Wondrous intelligence! for here you have in it The sudden resignation of the Cabinet.
_Sab._ The Cabinet resigned!
_St. G._ No, that's mere vapour! You must say something, just to sell the paper.
In Mr. Burnand's version, which is the longer of the two, there ismuch more story, and there are many more puns. St. George has not soprominent a place in the action, which is more elaborate and varied;while the dialogue is in the writer's most rollicking mood. Take, forexample, these, lines of Kalyba's, addressed to her sirens:--
_1st Siren._ Madame, there is a four-oared boat in view without a steerer.
_Kalyba_ (using pince-nez). P'raps the Harvard crew. No, they don't row _half hard_ enough for that; Take care! they'll go ashore upon the flat. They don't row well, but with uncommon pluck; The stroke wants art--p'raps he's a stroke of luck. I wonder where they come from! maybe Dover! A crab! as sure as _eggs_ is _eggs_ they're _ova_! Attract them here; you must not let them pass; Some visitors--give me my looking-glass (_they offer telescope_). Not that (_they give her a hand-mirror_). Now sing, as Sirens did before us; We _lure_ all here with tooral _looral_ chorus. To practise bathing arts we've our diploma. (_All have by this time produced the hand-mirrors and combs._) To attitudes! (_All pose themselves combing hair, etc._) We're in a state of _comber_.
Here, again, is a specimen of daring pun-making:--
_Vizier._ Sultan of Egypt, this pathetic tear Proves you've one faithful _Vizier_ left--_viz. here_.
_Sultan._ My star is set.
_Vizier_ (_looking at star on Sultan's breast_). With honour you have borne it. Stop! if your _star is set_ in diamonds, pawn it.
_Sultan._ The real one--this sham one's rather tasty-- Is gone: so _requiescat_--sir--_in pastey_.
A popular subject with the writers of burlesque for Christmastide hasbeen the time-honoured one of Cinderella. The first travestie of anyimportance was by Albert Smith and Kenny, seen at the Lyceum so longago as 1845. Next came H. J. Byron's version at the Strand in 1860,followed by Mr. Green's in 1871, Mr. Wilton Jones's (at Leicester) in1878, and Mr. Reece's (at the Gaiety) in 1883. A provincial burlesqueon this topic was called "Done-to-a-Cinderella," and in America therehas been a "Cinder-Ellen." Mr. Reece's piece was called, simply, "OurCinderella"; Mr. Jones's, "Little Cinderella." Byron's was christened"Cinderella, or the Lover, the Lackey, and the Little Glass Slipper."It has been a great favourite with the public ever since it was firstplayed with Maria Simpson as Cinderella, Miss Oliver as the Prince(Popetti), Miss Charlotte Saunders as his valet Dandino, John Clarkeas the Baron Balderdash, and Rogers and Miss Lavine as Clorinda andThisbe. Over and over again has this clever piece of work served as thebasis of pantomime "openings" both in town and country.
Following the traditional story closely enough, it bristles with thepuns in which Byron revelled, and which he poured forth with singularand somewhat exhausting lavishness. Thus, we find Dandino saying:--
As I've made my bed so I must lie. Continuing _bed_ metaphor, sir--I, When quite a child, the blackest draught would drain, And took my _pill_--oh! on _account o' pain!_ And as my youthful feathers all unfurled Seemed formed to make a _bold stir_ in the world, Little dreamt I I should appear a valet as, For I seemed born to reign in royal _palliasse_; But suddenly the future seemed to frown; Fortune gave me a quilt, an' _I'd a down_.
A little farther on Dandino and the Prince, who are about to exchangecharacters for the nonce, have the following little contest inpun-making:--
_Dandi._ But I must have a change of toggery: This coat, you will admit, is not the best cut, And neither is my waistcoat quite the _West cut_. I must di_vest_ myself of that affair: These buckles ain't the thing for _Buckley_ Square.
_Prince._ You shall be decked in gems of vast expense, And be a gem-man in a double sense. Your servant, I will wait, clean boots, wash glasses; Thus serve a nob, a_n' ob-serve_ all that passes.
_Dandi._ Then you'll obey me till you've found La Donna? You _pledge_ your princely word?
_Prince_ (_shaking his hand heartily_). _A-pawn_ my honour.
An even better instance of Byron's tendency to run a pun to death is tobe found in this colloquy between the Prince and Cinderella. The lattersays:--
_Cind._ Cinders and coals I'm so accustomed to, They seem to me to tinge all things I view.
_Prince._ That fact I can't say causes me surprise, For _kohl_ is frequently in ladies' eyes.
_Cind._ At morn, when reading, as the fire up-burns, The print to stops--to semi-_coaluns_--turns. I might as well read Coke.
_Prince._ Quite right you are,-- He's very useful reading at the _bar_. (_Chaffingly_) Who is your favourite poet?--Hobbs?
_Cind._ Not quite. No, I think, _Cole_-ridge is my favourite; His melan-_coally_ suits my situation; My dinner always is a _coald coal_-lation, Smoked pictures all things seem, whate'er may be'em, A _cyclorama_, through the "_Coal I see 'em_"
More acceptible in, pantomime than in travestie, "Little Red RidingHood" has nevertheless been the heroine of at least one burlesque whichhas made its mark--namely, that which Leicester Buckingham broughtout at the Lyceum just thirty years ago, under the auspices of EdmundFalconer. He had Miss Lydia Thompson for his Blondinette (Red RidingHood), and Miss Cicely Nott for the young lady's lover, Colin. Thefairy element was freely introduced, and instead of the wolf of theoriginal there was a Baron Reginald de Wolf ("the would-be abductor ofBlondinette, who finds he is sold when she 'ab duck'd herself to escapehim"). Here and there one gets in the "book" a glimpse of parody; asin--
My protege--my protege, Ah! never look so shy, For pretty girls seem ugly When a gloom is in their eye.
Or, again, in--
They say the peasant's life is sweet, But that we know all trash is, O; He very little gets to eat, For often scarce his cash is, O.
Teeth then he gnashes, O, Gnaws his moustaches, O; But jolly are the hours he spends When plentiful the cash is, O.
Passing over "Jack the Giant Killer," which H. J. Byron made thesubject of a burlesque, and "Jack and the Beanstalk," which wastreated in the same vein by the late Charles Millward, we cometo the travesties suggested by stories in the "Arabian Nights'Entertainments." These are fairly numerous. We may note, in particular,some of the versions of the tales of Aladdin, Ali Baba, PrinceCamaralzaman, and Abon Hassan, which seem to have offered mostattractions to our comic writers.
The first "Aladdin" of importance was that given to the world byGilbert Abbott a'Beckett in 1844. This was entitled "The Wonderful Lampin a New Light," and had Wright for its Aladdin and Paul Bedford forits Magician. Next in order of time comes H. J. Byron'
s "Aladdin, orthe Wonderful Scamp,"[26] which has shared the fate of his "Cinderella"as a basis for pantomimes. In this his fondness for _jeux de mots_ isas patent as ever, as well as the ease (without conspicuous finish)with which he fitted words to the songs of the day. Of direct parodythere is little in this "Aladdin," which, however, opens with a briefsuggestion of "The sea, the sea," sung by the Vizier:--
[26] In this the original Aladdin was Miss Marie Wilton; the Princess Badroulbadour, Miss Bufton; Widow Twankay, Rogers; Abanazar, Clarke; The Sultan, Miss Charlotte Saunders; and Pekoe, Miss Fanny Josephs (Strand, 1861).
The tea! the tea! Refreshing tea. The green, the fresh, the ever free From all impurity. I may remark that I'll be bound Full shillings six was this the pound-- Full shillings six was this the pound. I'm on for tea--I'm on for tea! For the savour sweet that doth belong To the curly leaf of the rough Souchong, Is like nectar to me, nectar to me, nectar to me. Let others delight in their _eau de vie_-- What matter, what matter? I'm on for tea.
During the last twenty years there have been four other notableburlesques on the "Aladdin" subject--Mr. Alfred Thompson's (1870), Mr.Green's (1874), Mr. Reece's (1881), and Mr. Geoffrey Thorn's (1890).With Mr. Reece's are associated pleasant memories of the bright "streetboy" of Miss Farren, Mr. Edward Terry's whimsical magician, and thegrace and refinement of Miss Kate Vaughan's Badroulbadour.
Second only to "Aladdin" in acceptability both to authors and topublic, is the story of "Ali Baba, or the Forty Thieves." Here, again,A'Beckett is (with Mark Lemon) to the fore with the travestie called"Open Sesame, or a Night with the Forty Thieves." This was produced atthe Lyceum Theatre, and had Mr. Frank Matthews for its Ali Baba, Mrs.Alfred Wigan for its Ganem, Wigan himself for its O'Mustapha (he wasan Irish Mussulman), the beautiful Miss Fairbrother for its Abdallah,Keeley for its Hassarac, Miss Georgina Hodson for its Cogia, and Mrs.Keeley for its Morgiana. _There_ was a cast for you! How many burlesquecasts of our own time could lay claim to so much talent and beauty?Cassim, in this piece, had to make one admirable pun:--
Such heaps of gems I never saw before: E'en Mortimer can't boast of such a Storr.
Elsewhere, O'Mustapha, who was a shoemaker, had to say:--
Business is dreadful bad--what's to be done? Where I sold fifty boots, I don't mend one. No longer Wellingtons are all the go: High-lows alone are worn by high and low. In vain upon my door this bill I fix-- "Five thousand Bluchers, all at 8_s._ 6_d._, Strong boys' at 3_s._ 9_d._"--folks once would use, But now it's quite another pair of shoes.
A'Beckett, however, did not lay himself out for punning in and out ofseason. His chief merit is the neatness of his style and the pervadingnature of his wit.
The most famous of all the Ali Baba travesties was that "joint-stock"burlesque, "The Forty Thieves," written by members of the Savage Club,and performed by the authors themselves at the Lyceum, in 1860, for thebenefit of the families of two literary men just then deceased. Planchewrote the prologue for this piece, and it was at once so brilliant andso admirably delivered by Leicester Buckingham that it nearly obtainedthe extraordinary honour of an encore. It was followed, three yearslater, by H. J. Byron's "Ali Baba, or the Thirty-Nine Thieves (inaccordance with the author's habit of taking one off!)."[27] Abdallah,the captain of the thieves (played by Miss Ada Swanborough), was heredepicted as a rascal of the quiet, elegant order, in sharp contrastto the Surrey-side villainy of his lieutenant, Hassarac. A colloquybetween these gave Byron an opportunity of satirising the melodramaticcriminal of the "good old times":--
[27] Miss P. Marshall, Ganem; George Honey, Hassarac; Miss Bufton, Cogia; Miss F. Hughes, Zaide; Miss C. Saunders, Morgiana (Strand, 1863).
_Abdal._ From all you say, my friend, you see it's plain That vulgar violence is on the wane; Therefore become more polished in your style, And, like King Richard, murder when you smile. I go into society, and none Know I'm a thief, or could conceive me one; I start new companies--obtain their pelf, And, having started them, I start myself; Swindle the widow--the poor _orphan_ do-- And then myself become an _off 'un_ too.
_Hassarac._ Bother! that's not of villainy my notion; Give me the tangled wood or stormy ocean-- A knife--dark lantern--lots of horrid things, With lightning, every minute, at the wings; A pistol, big enough for any crime, Which never goes off at the proper time; Deep rumbling, grumbling music on the drums-- A chord whenever one observes "She comes"; An opening chorus, about "Glorious wine"; A broadsword combat every sixteenth line; Guttural vows of direst vengeance wreaking, And thunder always when one isn't speaking. That was the style--exciting, if not true, At the old Cobourg;
_Abdal._ Oh, _coburg_lar, do--(_crosses to R._) You're horrifying me!
_Hassarac_ (_draws_). Spoon! sappy! duffer! Ha, ha! lay on, you milk-and-water muff-a, And _hem'd_ be he who first cries hold enough-a!
In 1872 Mr. Reece wrote for the Gaiety a piece called "Ali Baba a laMode"; in 1880 he prepared for the same theatre another version called"The Forty Thieves."[28] This latter, if I remember rightly, was thefirst of the burlesques in three acts. It presented in Mr. Terry (AliBaba), Miss Farren (Ganem), Mr. Royce (Hassarac), and Miss Vaughan(Morgiana), a quartett which is specially well remembered for the_verve_ and vivacity of its performance.
[28] A burlesque on the subject of "Ali Baba" was written by Mr. Gilbert Arthur a'Beckett.
The fortunes of Prince Camaralzaman have been pictured on the burlesquestage by the Brothers Brough, by Messrs. Bellingham and Best, by H.J. Byron, and by Mr. Burnand.[29] "Camaralzaman and Badoura, or thePeri who loved the Prince," was the Broughs' title, and they had theassistance of Mrs. Keeley, of Keeley (as a Djinn), of Bland (as theEmperor Bung), of Miss Reynolds (as Badoura), and of Miss Horton (asthe hero). Dimpl Tshin was the name given to one of the characters,and Skilopht that of another. The original story was followed in themain. Camaralzaman declines to marry at his father's request, and isincarcerated. In that position he soliloquises:--
[29] In the years 1848, 1865, 1871 and 1884 respectively.
'Tis now the very witching time of night, Which, were I free, would bring with it delight; Now could I drink hot grog, hear comic songs, Or join the gay Casino's gladsome throngs, Or drain, 'midst buzzing sounds of mirth and chaff, The foaming stout, or genial half-and-half; But here a prisoner condemned to stop, I can indulge in neither malt nor "hop." O, cruel Pa! to place me in this state, Because I would avoid your own sad fate. Dear mother, though a model of a wife, Gave me a slight distaste for married life. Better be thus than free, and have to stand "An eye like Ma's, to threaten and command."
Camaralzaman then breaks out into the following little bit of vocalparody:--
The Pope he leads a happy life, Because he hasn't got a wife; And one to take he's not so flat, He knows a trick worth two of that. No shrill abuse his ear affrights For stopping out too late at nights; No curtain lectures damp his hopes: A happy lot must be the Pope's.
The Broughs were always ingenious in their word-plays. Says one of thecharacters in this burlesque:--
Soon, I feel, with passion and disgust, Within this _bosom_ there will be a _bust_.
Again:--
I wonder how he'd look with a moustache; He's got none yet, though, thanks to sorrow's growth, He feels a little _down about the mouth_.
Says Badoura to a suitor whom she does not favour:--
I may be handsome, but I'll now be plain; So, I'll not have you, sir--you kneel in vain;
to which he replies:--
Can one so fair thus speak to her adorer? Your form a _Venus_, but your words a _Floorer_.
In the piece by Messrs. Bellingham and Best--"Prince Camaralzaman,or the Fairies' Revenge"[30]--we find, amid many well-conceived andwell-executed puns, a rather succe
ssful adaptation of the "To be, ornot to be" soliloquy, possessing the merit of being quite in keepingwith the character of the matrimony-scorning Camaralzaman:--
[30] These authors were happy in having Miss Ellen Farren to represent their hero, Miss Henrietta Lindley being the Badoura, W. H. Stephens and Mrs. Stephens the King and Queen, and Mr. Soutar the Skidamalink (King of the Isle of Ebony) (Olympic, 1865).
To wed or not to wed--that is the question Which weighs me down like midnight indigestion. Whether it is nobler in a man to bear The stings and taunts of an outrageous fair, Or to take arms against a married life, And, by opposing, shun it? To wed a wife-- No more; for by a wife we say we end The undarned stockings laundresses won't mend, The buttonless shirts and all the botheration That single flesh is heir to--a consummation Devoutly to be wished--forswear the club And wed, perchance, a flirt,--ay, there's the rub; For in our married lives what rows there would be, If all were not precisely as it should be! And who would bear a scolding vixen's tongue, Backed by a mother-in-law, not over young; The cook, who, when annoyed, the dinner burns, The insolence of Buttons, and the spurns That patient masters from their servants take, When one a quiet house might always make By keeping single? I'll not change my lot, But rather bear the ills that I have got Than fly to others that I yet know not.
In another passage, the "spiritualistic" craze is satirised in aso-called "chant":--
Abracadabra, mystic word, come down to us from the cosmogony, 'Tis the spell that binds the spirits beneath Mr. Home's mahogany; You've been to a _seance_, of course, when darkness baffles the searcher, And a spectral hand rises quivering--sceptics hint that it's gutta-percha. When ghostly fingers are tickling some foolish old fellow's fat dumpy knee, And the medium floats as easily as a modern bubble company; 'Tis then that the spirits are working--to asses the men they transmogrify By spells that have nothing in common with the generally received orthography.
Two of the burlesques on "Arabian Nights" topics are from the penof Francis Talfourd. First came--in 1852, at the Olympic--"Ganem,the Slave of Love" (with Miss Fanny Maskell as Fetnah, the caliph'sfavourite); and later--in 1854, at the St. James's--"Abon Hassan, orthe Hunt after Happiness" (with Mr. Toole as Haroun-al-Raschid). In theformer piece the wealth of felicitous punning is remarkable. Thus, inhis very, first speech, Ganem, coming in intoxicated, says:--
All things around me seem involved in doubt, I only know that I've been, dining out. I've made some blunder, sure--but how I've made it Is from my dizzy pate quite dissipated. A light upon my understanding breaks-- I must be drunk! Or what is it thus makes My head to stoop and butt the ground incline, Unless the butt of beer or stoop of wine? Now, to go on--so--Ganem, my boy, steady-- I can't go far--I'm too far gone already. Ah! could I swarm this lime, I might, _sans doute_, Learn from its friendly branch my proper route.
In other places we read:--
A needlewoman's life's, at best, but _sew-sew_
(which is as true as it is witty);
_Alkalomb._ He had the freedom, sir, to squeeze me.
_Giaffar._ Yes, You wouldn't check the freedom of the _press_.
_Caliph._ In his affections I stand no competitor
(_squaring up_),
And for that _belle's life_ you'll find I'm a _head-hitter_.
_Malevola._ I'm her abettor in the plucky course.
_Caliph._ You couldn't, ma'am, _abet her_ in a _worse_.
"Abon Hassan" is less freely endowed with verbal pleasantry, but it hasits fair share of puns, and the songs are numerous and bright. At theclose, the hero, addressing the audience, allows himself to drop intothe reflective mood:--
In mine, read a too common history-- How many an unfortunate, like me, With feverish haste the cup of pleasure begs, To find experience in its bitter dregs! The wretched man sips at the draught now hated. Unless, like me, he gets _a-man-sip-hated_. Beware, then, how you mix and make your cup,-- I'll give you a receipt for it: boil up In a clean vessel--say your own clay crock-- As much good humour as will form your stock; Throw in to others' faults a modest blindness, Adding a quart of milk of human kindness; Scrape up a few acquaintances, but you Had better take care they're your wife's friends too: Omit the mother-in-law, if you've the power, As apt to turn the milk aforesaid sour! Skim off bad habits from the surface: you'll Then let it stand--'tis better taken cool; Or, should you be in love a far-gone coon, Stir the whole gently with a virtuous "spoon"; In which case, flavour with a dash of sentiment, Garnish with smiles, and drink it with contentment![31]
[31] Another burlesque on the same story, entitled "Abon Hassan, or An Arabian Knight's Entertainment," was brought out at the Charing Cross Theatre in 1869. The author's name was Arthur O'Neil, and the cast included Miss Emily Fowler as the hero, and Mr. Flockton as Haroun Alraschid.
On German faerie our comic dramatists have not drawn at all largely.Such pieces as Gilbert Abbott a'Beckett's "Knight and the Sprite,or the Cold-Water Cure," with Ondine as its heroine; H. J. Byron's"Nymph of the Lurleyburg, or the Knight and the Naiads," based on theLurline legend; and Mr. Burnand's "Rumpelstiltskin, or the Woman atthe Wheel," founded on one of the Brothers Grimm's narratives, areexceptional incursions in this field. The first was seen at the Strandin 1884, with Mrs. Walter Lacy as Sir Hildebrand, and with Hall andRomer in other parts. "The Nymph of the Lurleyburg" has often doneduty for the purposes of Christmas extravaganza. When it was firstperformed--in 1859--Miss Woolgar was the Sir Rupert the Reckless, Mr.Toole the Seneschal, and Paul Bedford the Baron Witz, the _locale_being the Adelphi. Mr. Burnand introduced into "Rumpelstiltskin"(Royalty, 1864) a few modifications of the German tale, inventing andimporting new characters. In one of the scenes he furnished a divertingsuggestion of the situation in "The Ticket of Leave Man," when therecomes the sudden and effective revelation of "Hawkshaw the Detective!"Among the _personae_ are King Tagarag the Tremendous, Prince Poppet,Baron Higgle-de-Piggle, Wriggleletto (the court spy), Jolinosio (amiller), and Fraulein Splitaharter (the belle of the village). Miss AdaCavendish was the Princess Superba.
"The Vampire"--a burlesque by Mr. Reece, which was played at the Strandin 1872--appears to have owed its origin about equally to the Germanlegend, the romance which Lord Byron wrote on the subject, and the playwhich Dion Boucicault founded on the topic in 1852. As, however, thelegend was the inspiration alike of romance, play, and travestie, thetravestie may be mentioned here. Mr. Reece had drawn the Vampire as abeing so fond of "blood," that he sought to possess it in the shape ofthe notebooks of two "sensation"-novelists, one of whom, Lady AudleyMoonstone, was admirably represented by Mrs. Raymond.[32] The followingspecimen of the dialogue has been handed down to us. Some one says to aWelsh corporal:--
On Monday and on Tuesday you were queer: Why drink on Wednesday?
_Corporal._ 'Cause I'm _Thursday_, dear.
[32] Mr. Edward Terry was the Vampire himself, and other parts were taken by Harry Cox, Miss Rose Cullen, and Miss Topsy Venn.
In the realm of Spanish legend there have been still fewer explorers.Albert Smith took one of Washington Irving's tales of the Alhambra,and fashioned it into "The Alhambra, or The Beautiful Princess," playedat the Princess's in 1851, with the Keeleys, Wigan, Harley, Flexmore,and Miss Vivash. H. J. Byron afterwards went to the same source for"The Pilgrim of Love," in the first cast of which--at the Haymarketin 1860--we find the names of Mrs. Buckingham White as the Pilgrim,Chippendale as his tutor, Compton as the King of Toledo, Rogers as theKing of Granada, and C. Coghlan as Mafoi, a Frenchman: a rather notablecollocation of distinguished players.
The Fables of AEsop have inspired at least one travestie--"Leo theTerrible," by Stirling Coyne and Francis Talfourd. In this piece(brought out at the Ha
ymarket in 1852) all the characters but fourwore the heads of beasts or birds--a lion (Bland), a wolf (Buckstone),a fox, an owl, a ram, a poodle, a cat (Miss Maskell), and so on. Thefour exceptions were Sir Norval de Battersea, Timoleon Sindbad Potts(Keeley), AEsop, and Gay; and the play opened with a _rencontre_ betweenthe two last-named worthies. AEsop began with a vocal parody on "TheLight of other Days":--
To write in other days as Gay did, The world is grown too fast; The rage for La Fontaine has faded-- The stream run dry at last. On me the world has turned the tables And turned to bad, I guess; For they who thus can spurn my Fables Must care for morals less. Stop; who comes here? If I to judge am able, 'Tis Gay, the worthiest son of modern Fable.
_Enter Gay dejectedly._
How dull and sad he seems!
_Gay_ (_soliloquising_). My old dominion On earth is gone.
_AEsop_ (_rising_). Gad! that's just my opinion.
_Gay._ AEsop! What brings you here? Why thus, by Styx, Are you, your staff and luggage, in a fix? As downcast as a 'prentice runaway.
_AEsop._ Am I? Well, _you_ look anything but Gay, But tell me--whither have you wandering been?
_Gay._ About the world. Such changes now I've seen-- Such altered views of virtue and rascality; There's not a fable left--'tis all reality.
_AEsop._ Reality! Why, bless your simple soul, The world's a fable now from pole to pole! Pills, politics, or projects made to cram one,-- What we called fables once are now called gammon.
In the end, the various animals express repentance for the wrong theyhave committed; and AEsop, in recognition thereof, restores them to theshapes they formerly presented.
A Book of Burlesque: Sketches of English Stage Travestie and Parody Page 6
