What talented family members she had. She still considered Cruz one of hers. He was Mari’s father, after all. The dear man had agreed to waive all fees and to pay for his sound and lighting systems and crews to be brought into town out of his own pocket, which was extraordinarily generous of him.
Her board had really come through to pull this off in such a short window of time, especially when she had been curled up in her bed, wanting to disappear.
By the time they arrived, the venue was filling up. She knew they had sold out.
Somehow, she wasn’t sure how, Stella managed to hold it together through the opening act, a local band of high school students, two of whom she knew had been in foster care.
She clapped and rose to her feet along with everyone else when they finished and then a few moments later, when Cruz came out to wild applause.
Instead of focusing on her grief, she forced herself to focus on the excitement of everyone around her as he started performing. Cape Sanctuary and the surrounding communities certainly loved their hometown boy.
After three or four songs, Cruz stopped and gripped the stand microphone.
“Tonight, as you all know, this concert is a benefit for a cause important to me. Open Hearts supports foster families throughout Northern California, families who are helping kids in need.”
His face took on that soulful look that drove fans wild. “A lot of my fans don’t know this but there was a dark time in my life when I was one of those kids in need. A wonderful, caring neighbor took me in. Those of you from Cape Sanctuary know her well because she’s been helping troubled kids for years. This next song is dedicated to Stella Davenport, one of my personal heroes.”
Her face went hot and everyone looked over at her as Cruz picked up an acoustic guitar and started singing “Ripples,” one of his early hits, a ballad about courage and change and how small acts of kindness can change the world. It was always an emotional song, and as she looked around, she saw she wasn’t the only one sniffling.
His band segued into another of his hits, this one with a sexy salsa beat that always made the crowd dance. As the fans rose to their feet and started swaying, Stella suddenly felt trapped, claustrophobic.
Her pain suddenly seemed too big for her to keep contained.
She had to get out of here, to a place where she could breathe again.
“Excuse me. I need...some water,” she said to Ed.
She made her way to the aisle and rushed off the field.
“Let me stamp your hand so you can come back,” a ticket agent said. She blindly thrust her hand out, but it was shaking so much it was tough for the woman to stamp it.
Without a clear destination, only needing to be away from the cloying press of people, she headed to the edge of the park, where Driftwood Park turned into Driftwood Beach.
It was quieter here, with only a few people walking by or trying to hang out and listen to the band without paying for tickets.
She plopped down onto the sand, letting the soothing music of the waves wash over her.
She had only been there for a moment when someone joined her. Somehow, she knew without looking away from the vast expanse of sea whom she would find.
“When you said you needed water,” Ed said, “I assumed you meant a drink. Not the whole ocean.”
“I think it was my spirit that was thirsty.”
He was such a good man. A good man who deserved more than she could offer right now. Still, she didn’t push him away when he sat beside her and pulled her into his arms.
The sense of safety and warmth and peace was overwhelming. She wanted to close her eyes and simply rest here, with the Pacific murmuring its soft song.
“Stella. Don’t shut me out this time.”
She sighed. She didn’t have the strength to push him away. Not when she knew now how very much she needed him.
Ed Clayton soothed her soul even more than the ocean waves.
“Why did you walk away twenty years ago?”
“You know why. I had to focus on the girls. You didn’t need a ready-made family when you were still in medical school.”
“Did it ever occur to you that sometimes you don’t always know what’s best?”
“All the time.”
“We loved each other. We could have figured out a way to make it work somehow. You don’t have to carry everything alone. Then or now.”
Tears began to trickle down and she sniffled. She had caused so much pain for both of them, thinking her way was the only way.
“I love you, Stella Davenport. In good times and bad.”
She didn’t deserve him. But, oh, how she wanted another chance.
“I know you’re grieving your baby. Take as long as you need. Just don’t shut me out, okay? Not like you did then.”
“I don’t know how to navigate this,” she whispered.
“Like anything hard in life. You breathe through it for one minute at a time. That becomes ten minutes, then twenty, then an hour. And before you know it, you’ve made it through another day, then a week, then a month. And if you’re lucky, very lucky, you have someone there to hold your hand and help you through.”
“You’re right. That’s the only way.”
He entwined his fingers with hers. His skin was warm and she thought of how many lives he had brought into the world with those hands.
“The difference this time is that I want to be standing by your side, Stella. I’m not going anywhere.”
She rested her head on his chest and he wrapped both arms around her, resting his chin on her head, both of them looking out at the last dying rays of the sun.
“I wanted to be a mother. But as I listened to Cruz tonight, I understood in a way I never have before that there are many pathways to being a mother. I was a mother to Bea and Daisy, to Cruz, to the other young people I have cared for in my home and taught at school over the past twenty years. I don’t need to have a baby to nurture children.”
“It just so happens that I have a daughter who could greatly benefit from some of that nurturing,” he said. “And if you decide down the line you want to try again for a baby, the traditional way this time, it’s possible I might know somebody who would be more than happy to help you out with that.”
She smiled, her first genuine smile in what felt like a lifetime. “I believe I would enjoy that very much, Dr. Clayton.”
He laughed softly and a breeze caught it. She kissed him as the waves brushed against the shore and the stars began to pop out, one by one.
As their mouths met, familiar yet new, she felt that breeze carry some of her sadness out to sea.
36
BEATRIZ
She always enjoyed watching Cruz perform.
Her ex-husband came alive on stage. He was not only musically gifted but also energetic and athletic and engaging, with the stage presence that had turned him into a star.
No matter what song he performed, people couldn’t look away.
Women old enough to be Cruz’s grandmother were actually weeping at times as he sang. His fan base wasn’t strictly female, though. Guys admired his guitar work and the whole persona of Cruz Romero.
It seemed strange when she tried to articulate it to herself, but she was proud of him. Cruz had followed his dream of making music and turned it into something bigger than either of them could have dreamed, back in the days when they had existed on ramen noodle soup and peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.
How many hours had she spent at his side, listening to him try out the lyrics to a new song? Or trailed across the country after him as he played in small clubs and tried to convince somebody, anybody, to listen to his demos?
Those had been wonderful, heady times and she would always be grateful for them.
But she also remembered the heartbreak the first time she found out he slept with
a groupie while he was out on tour. Then another. Then another.
She had fallen out of love with him somewhere along their journey, maybe the fifth or sixth time she caught him cheating on her.
That didn’t mean she couldn’t appreciate his talent and the way he had the crowd at the ballpark totally engrossed in the show.
Except, maybe, her. She kept looking over to where Shane sat, on the other side of the stage and four or five rows back. He was with his new assistant coach Marcus Robinson, who had also come from playing professional football, and a couple of their players.
She told herself she was only looking back to check on Stella after she left, but she knew that was a lie. Anyway, Dr. Clayton had immediately risen to follow Stella, asking Bea if she would mind keeping an eye on Rowan for him.
Once when she looked back, she was almost positive she saw Shane looking in her direction, but he shifted his attention back to the stage quickly.
He wasn’t with his French teacher tonight. Bea didn’t know what to think about that.
She tried to shift back to the concert as Cruz ended a long up-tempo song that had most of the crowd dancing and reached for the microphone again.
“I want to thank everybody for showing up tonight. This has been amazing. There’s nothing like a summer evening in Northern California and what a beautiful venue, here in my hometown of Cape Sanctuary.”
The crowd went crazy, cheering loudly both for Cruz and for hometown glory.
“I have two people especially to thank for tonight. If not for one of these people, I wouldn’t be standing here. I wouldn’t be standing anywhere.” Cruz grinned and the crowd laughed along with him.
“I want to introduce you all to my special guest, Gabriel Ellison.”
Beside her, she heard a gasp from Daisy, who straightened to attention to watch a moment later when a surprised-looking Gabe came out from behind the stage and mounted the steps to join Cruz.
Bea didn’t know what was going on but she was more interested in Daisy’s reaction than whatever Cruz had planned. Her sister couldn’t seem to take her gaze away from Gabe, her expression a raw mixture of emotions that totally shocked Bea. Pain and longing and something else she couldn’t read.
Her sister was in love with him! Talk about secrets! Forget about Marguerite—now, this was something worth talking about. Her careful, introspective, sometimes boring sister was in love with an adventurous filmmaker who had probably not spent more than a month in one place in his life!
She suddenly remembered Daisy saying Gabe had been the one to tell her she needed to let her family know about Marguerite.
Something was definitely going on between the two of them. She had known there must be more to the story when the two of them had ended up sharing responsibility for that sweet little dog.
Daisy was in love with Gabe Ellison, but judging by the misery on her features, the relationship wasn’t going well.
How could Bea fix that?
She couldn’t, at least not right this moment, so she shifted her attention back to Cruz, realizing he was telling the crowd about how he had met Gabe.
“Some of you know that I was attacked almost a month ago at a concert very much like this one, on a beautiful summer evening. If not for the bravery of one man, that would have been the night the music died, for me, at least. Gabe Ellison stepped in front of a knife for me. We were all but strangers, yet he was willing to risk his life to protect me. This man right here is the very definition of a hero.”
The crowd went crazy at that, roaring and clapping. Daisy, Bea noticed, clapped harder than anyone.
As soon as they quieted, Cruz went on, “Gabe, from the very bottom of my heart, thank you. In your honor, I am donating one hundred thousand dollars to the Open Hearts foundation.”
Again, the crowd went crazy. Gabe looked shocked, especially when a couple of scantily dressed girls came out carrying one of those giant cardboard checks, written to Open Hearts.
Oh, Stella would love this, but she wasn’t back yet. At least there were a couple thousand people with their phones out, videoing the moment.
“There is one more person I need to thank tonight. I would like to get her up on stage, too, if I could. Everybody give a hand for my beautiful wife, Beatriz Romero.”
Everything inside her froze. He couldn’t have called her out, had he?
She shook her head vigorously but the crowd around them, all people she knew from town, urged her to go up on stage. She was seriously going to kill the man, the first chance she had.
“Come on up here, babe,” he said again.
“Go on, Mom,” Mari said, eyes wide with shock.
She did not know what to do, but with everyone in the crowd watching—with their daughter watching—she was pretty sure she didn’t have much of a choice.
Daisy gave her a sympathetic look as she rose on knees that suddenly shook and made her way to the steps to the side of the stage. The security team made way for her, and as she started to go up, her gaze seemed to instinctively find Shane, who stood a half head taller than just about anybody else there, big and blond and gorgeous.
With the glare of the spotlights burning on her, she couldn’t see his expression. She didn’t need to. She knew he would be frowning.
As soon as she was on stage, Cruz wrapped his arms around her in a tight hug that again made the crowd go nuts.
“What the hell are you doing?” she whispered to Cruz, hoping his mic didn’t pick up the words.
“What I should have done a long time ago,” he said.
Suddenly, before she realized what was happening, he started to go down on one knee. Oh, no. He wanted to propose again. She could not let that happen but how on earth was she going to stop it?
In a panic, she looked again toward Shane, wishing he could come rescue her, but she couldn’t see him. She had to do this herself.
On instinct, she snatched the microphone out of Cruz’s hand and headed to the other side of the stage, hoping with all her heart that he hadn’t made it all the way down to the stage yet.
“Have you all had a fantastic time tonight? Give it up for our hometown hero, Cruz Romero.”
The crowd cheered like crazy. She was aware of him coming to take the microphone from her but she wasn’t going to surrender it that easily. Sure, he had a headset mic, but he couldn’t talk over her.
“If we all ask Cruz really nicely, maybe he will sing the song everybody wants to hear, his first Grammy-winning single, ‘Life Rolls On.’ What do you say? Can we persuade him?”
The noise level was off the charts. Cruz didn’t look happy with her but she didn’t care. She had told him over and over she was not getting back together with him. It was unfair of him to try pressuring her into it, in front of two thousand of her closest friends.
As she might have predicted, Cruz couldn’t resist giving the crowd what it wanted.
“I was saving that one for an encore, but since you asked, we can do it now.”
His backup band hit the first chords and Cruz started to sing. While he was busy catering to his fans, she slipped back down the steps, into the crowd.
“That was so awesome!” Rowan Clayton looked absolutely thrilled that someone she knew had been on stage with Cruz Romero, which Bea found hilarious considering Mari, Cruz’s daughter, was quickly becoming Rowan’s best friend.
“Was it?” She looked for Shane but she couldn’t see him. She needed to talk to him. To explain once and for all that she wasn’t getting back together with Cruz.
“Nice save,” Daisy said.
She smiled a little just as Stella and Ed came back to join them.
“What did we miss?” Stella asked.
“We’ll tell you later,” Daisy yelled over the music. “But Open Hearts is going to be able to expand its operations, maybe all the way down to the Bay Area.
”
Bea didn’t know what had happened between Stella and Dr. Clayton, but she thought there was a different light about Stella. She still seemed sad, which was totally understandable, but there was also something almost hopeful in her expression.
She was also holding hands with Ed and didn’t seem to want to let go. She and Daisy both noticed at the same moment and exchanged a smile.
Good for Stella. She deserved a great guy like Ed Clayton, who clearly adored her.
Bea deserved a great guy, too.
The knowledge hit her like the stage set falling on her.
If she wanted a good man like Shane, she had to be willing to fight for him, no matter what.
With new drive, she listened to the few remaining songs in Cruz’s repertoire. He didn’t sing the new one he had been working on, the one he’d asked her help on. She could only be glad for that.
“Can we go backstage and see Dad?” Mari asked when the lights came up and the exhilarated crowd started to disperse.
The last place Bea wanted to go was backstage to face the ex-husband she had just brushed off in front of all of his adoring fans, but she couldn’t figure out a way to avoid it.
“For a moment. I imagine he’ll be busy talking to fans.”
“I just want to tell him what a good job he did,” Mari said. “And Ro wants a picture with him.”
After making sure it was all right with Dr. Clayton, she led Rowan and Mari to the area that had been roped off for post-concert mingling among the musicians, the crew and their special guests.
Security instantly let them through with her all-access pass.
As she might have expected, Cruz was surrounded by fans. He spotted them after just a moment, though, and made his way toward them. He hugged Mari and went to hug Bea but she managed to avoid it by reaching down to adjust her sandal.
“Great show, Dad,” Mari said.
“Thanks, Mar. We had some technical difficulties but the fans still seemed to like it.”
“You remember my friend Rowan, right? She came to Universal with us.”
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