by LJ Swallow
Skin to skin, her breasts against mine, her heat and aching need to match mine pull me tightly until the strings finally break. Her kisses become urgent, her hands on me, wanting everything, and I lose the control I’ve wanted to.
I’m not the vicious creature who kills, I’m a guy who this girl believes deserves happiness. Pulling my mouth from Maeve’s, I meet her eyes and our heavy breaths mingle. She’s in my control, but one she wants to give. As I work my fingers. Maeve’s hand closes over mine.
“Stop.”
I swallow and obey, opening my mouth to apologise, the words caught in my throat when she curls her small hand around me, moving her legs until the moment I’ve held back from comes into reach.
Her mouth tips into a small smile. “But don’t stop.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes.”
Taking a shuddery breath, I keep my eyes on Maeve’s as we finally connect in a way I’ve tortured myself with in my dreams. I’ve barely started to move inside her when a pain to match the one I felt in my vision of the past screams through my mind and spreads through my limbs into my chest. I’m being crushed from the inside, heart and lungs straining with agony.
Maeve reaches out again as I pull away. “What’s wrong?”
I can barely hear her, every ounce of desire cut dead by the agony. Worse, I can’t feel her anymore—not her energy or her skin.
“You weren’t hurting or frightening me.” Maeve tries to pull me towards her, but her touch is like an electric shock. “Not at all, Tobias.”
“I know,” I say through gritted teeth and dip my head. A cold perspiration spreads across my forehead. “I can’t. This hurts.”
“What does? Holding yourself back?”
I shake my head and struggle for breath. The heat from Maeve’s body grows stronger, but the taste of her on my lips becomes bitter. She breathes heavily, face and neck flushed as her blood races in her veins.
I can’t smell her either.
Everything connecting me to Maeve is destroyed.
I move further away, as desperate to break contact as I was to make love to her and Maeve’s distress fills the hollowness in my heart. Whichever man I am with Maeve will never bring us anything but pain.
I sit on the floor, head in hands. As my heart slows and desire drops, my pain begins to subside.
“Do you mean physically hurts?” she whispers in shock as she touches my back.
I jerk at the burn from her fingers. “Yes. And I thought I’d be the one to hurt you.”
I’m in hell.
I’m in the fucking hell I deserve.
“This is the curse.” Maeve’s tearing eyes harden. “There’s nothing we can do until we break the curse!”
I rub an arm across my forehead. “No. But—”
“Don’t say it!” she shouts and the words pound at my aching head. “Don’t say I can’t! If I can take on Gabriella or Anastasia, I can break a fucking curse.”
I snap my head up and look at her gripping the sheet to herself, eyes filled with fury.
“And if beating the two women kills me, there’ll be no need.” I shuffle forward and touch her cheek, ignoring the way the usual buzz zaps me like I’m gripping an electric fence. “We tried. I tried. Please believe that I love you and at least know I’d never hurt you.”
“No, Tobias.” A tear tracks down her cheek. “You won’t die. We’ll survive this—all of us. Together.”
The pain subsides as my racing heart slows, and I press my lips to Maeve’s forehead. I’d give anything—every single second of the ecstasy in my past—for one chance to experience the same with Maeve now.
But the Winterfall I killed told me the truth.
I’ll never have happiness.
As long as I live, unable to show my consuming love for the girl who’s a part of me, I’ll never be at peace.
Chapter Fifty-Nine
MAEVE
I always wanted my reality dragged away from the hell I’m facing, but not in the way I experienced last night. I’m in a new hell, scared I’ll lose one of the most important people in my life. In another cruel twist, the closeness I finally found with Tobias has dragged him further away from me.
We sat together, and he held me while I cried trying to bring me comfort despite his own pain. We talked about the little things in life, avoiding the ones looming over us. In a strange way, the intimacy from knowing tiny details such as his favourite movie or place to visit halfway makes up for the physical intimacy denied us.
Halfway.
Never fully.
I stayed with him until the early hours, dozing and waking with my cheek pressed against his chest, trying not to think about earlier.
But we never spoke about what will happen today and didn’t mention the end, instead parting with a kiss that broke my heart and soul. All I want is Tobias with me at the end. The very end—where we all survive and our lives start together. All of us.
Tonight.
I glance at Amelia’s bed. She should be here with me, not sneaking in later. With term called to a halt early, there’s no time to properly organise an end of term dance, but now I’ve discovered one is going ahead, I’m doubly nervous.
At least this will be held outside in an area surrounded by security. Garrett ensured the extra guards would watch us, but I’m happy we won’t be inside the building. The students are safer outside and, after today, everybody will leave the academy.
Time ticks by until the time I’ll sneak away and join Tobias as he watches the tunnels for the two women. How soon until I can leave and face whatever the hell is down there?
Amelia and Matt checked in again this morning to confirm they’re okay and still watching. One of Alaric’s contacts told them Gabriella is on the move, so they’re on alert. I’d like to be optimistic that somebody could prevent them arriving on campus, but Gabriella and Anastasia are in every vision. Once, I’d question how they’d find their way on campus, but the answer is easy. Anastasia’s temporal magic.
But where will this place her? She can only appear in places she’s been before. Has she been beneath the academy? Questions tumble around my mind as I tie my hair from my face and brush the front of my blazer ready for the final assembly.
If this were my old school, the ceremony would take place outside in the summer sunshine, but there’s no chance of that here because the mistrusted hemia wouldn’t be able to attend.
I haven’t seen Theodora since our meeting with Garrett and Sofia, and I’ve half-expected Confederacy interference, but they’re focused on the recent murders. I strongly suspect Theodora used magic against somebody in charge to allow her the extra days. Should we have insisted the academy closes too? But what authority do we have and how would we explain?
Somebody might stop me.
Garrett and Tobias alternate between watching the tunnel entrance, and Sofia has retreated back to watching her students with more intensity than usual. I’m guilty that I mistrusted her, but her zeal is only a few steps from Theodora’s.
Everybody wants to protect and all they do is destroy.
My thoughts turn to Andrei and his isolation with the other hemia, the ones watching each other in suspicion over who attacked the students and punished them all. Andrei’s outburst when told he and the others weren’t allowed to walk the academy halls anymore shone a spotlight on him at the time.
The marks on my skin are barely visible now—pin pricks that look like tiny spots. I’ve ached to be with him since that night, craving the high to snuff out the constant fear. However much I try to live in the present, the future is always with me.
A knock on the door draws me away from my thoughts and I answer. Jamie stands outside dressed in his full academy uniform, the groomed, good-looking guy I met on my first day. If only I’d known that the vision of his death was nothing compared to what would assault me later. He smiles, but his eyes hold the same stress as mine. We have half a plan because we don’t know what to expect.
<
br /> Tiptoeing, I kiss his cheek but he moves to kiss me properly, mouth soft and his kiss tender. “Where did you go last night?” he murmurs as he nudges my ear with his nose. “Andrei?”
“No. Tobias. I needed to see him before... everything.”
Jamie gives a curt nod then slides his hand in mine. “I understand. I haven’t seen Ash today. Have you heard from him?”
“He called me earlier to say he can’t find Clive and the guys. They never attended the end of term Gilgamesh party last night and they were the organisers. I heard a rumour spreading that the hemia killed them too, not only the witches.”
“That’s not true,” he retorts. “The hemia are stuck inside.”
“I know. Ash is worried about today.” We walk along the hall, which is busy with students. The mood in Walcott remains sombre and the distance between students who want tolerance between the races and those who want segregation grows daily.
Yvette watches us pass but remains silent and I’m confused why she’s stayed. Her disapproval and disgust don’t touch me. I’m distant from this normality, unable to focus on anything but knowing the day will end in chaos and death.
Jamie squeezes my hand. “We’re prepared, Maeve.”
“I don’t want people to die.”
“And that’s why the ceremony and dance tonight will be held on the grounds, remember? Nobody will be in the building.”
“Theodora can’t think extra guards and wards can keep Dominion out.”
But she does.
“Your runes are alongside the Blackwood ones now. That will stop them if Theodora is right. Anastasia and Gabriella will be trapped if they go down there.”
“I hope so,” I whisper.
With a sigh, Jamie wraps an arm around my shoulders and kisses me on the top of the head. “We’ve got this.”
Trepidation unlike any I’ve experienced before follows me as we make our way outside.
I hope so.
Chapter Sixty
MAEVE
I sit beside Jamie as I watch the students make their way across the lawns towards the chairs arranged in three rows for the separate houses. The space mimics the hall where the whole academy meets; we’re outside, but the atmosphere is the same.
Magical lights resembling the stars in the night sky decorate the edges of the large white marquee close by; the canvas doors are pinned back, revealing circular tables decorated in silver and with flower centrepieces in the house colours arranged together on every table.
The area chosen for the ceremony is at the opposite side of the grounds to where the tunnels lead and far from the main building—too far, according to the grumbling witches joining us.
Metal folding chairs are placed in a row on a small dais beneath a willow tree, a makeshift stage for Theodora and her professors. Small gift bags rest on a table beside a trophy. Prizes? Did the professors judge the challenge based on what we achieved before the abrupt halt?
The chatter around drops as Yvette nudges her friends, her face souring into a poisonous expression. I don’t need to look to know why. Six hemia join the other Petrescu kids and I panic when I can’t see the seventh hemia—Andrei isn’t here.
Garrett takes Tobias’s place on stage, as he and Sofia sit either side of Theodora’s central seat with the others around—every professor and not only house heads.
Apart from Tobias.
I watch the stunning woman walk across the stage, as always looking like a Hollywood celebrity. Theodora wears her favourite blue suit today; the short skirt touches her knees and matching blue spiked heels add length to her slender legs. She’s every part the usual Professor Lancaster.
What does her connection to this place mean? She helped us, but her determination to keep the academy safe could be for an entirely different reason. How did Theodora think she could keep something of this magnitude a secret? She managed to contain the presence held below the academy for years but refuses to accept the situation changed. Her faith in my magic holds and I wish I had the same unwavering belief.
My visions are never wrong.
I don’t know if anything will come out, but we’re definitely going in—unless I can stop the Dominion.
“Clive is still missing,” I whisper as I crane my head to study the shifters through the dim. “Who else?”
“Check with Ash,” Jamie whispers back.
I pull my phone from my pocket and quickly text him. My heart slams into my chest when I read his reply: All of them. Biting my lip, I turn the phone for Jamie to read the screen.
“Shit.”
Theodora begins her address, soothing voice magnified by the mic on the stand in front, but she can’t fill the space around the way she does in the hall. I’m on pins, heart rate refusing to slow as I watch every movement around me. Guards stand at the corners of the seating area and one either side of the stage.
The students aren’t in the hall. They’re safe from the fire.
“As you know, we’re required to perform some repairs on the academy buildings, which means we need to hold our assembly and celebrations outside.” I’m close enough to see her smile. “I’m afraid the library roof beams show signs of rot. Those who frequent the library may have noticed the temporary supports.”
Her over-explanation draws murmurs from around. “There’s nothing to celebrate,” mutters Yvette behind, loud enough for me to hear.
“I don’t wish you to miss out on the end of term celebrations and as we’re unsure how much of the roof is affected, we’ll hold our dance outside tonight too.” Heads turn to where she gestures at the nearby marquee and more low chatter passes between students. “And although we haven’t completed the challenge, the professors and I have added up the points awarded so far to choose the winning team.”
Katherine straightens and flicks her hair over one shoulder and Ash turns to us. Not all our team are here—Kimberly left for home early, Seamus is missing with Clive. Without Clive, two of the top performing teams will draw attention if chosen.
Theodora turns to Professor Turlington and words pass between them. She beckons for him to join her.
“Only three teams reached the potion creation stage. Professor Turlington tested the potions for purity and awarded points. I marked the teams based on co-operation.”
I glance at Jamie. Our team won’t gain many points from Theodora for that.
The potions professor clears his throat and bends over the mic stand. “I tested the potions on something small—an apple into an orange. The results were pleasing. However, only one potion completely changed the fruit and that was Team Three.”
“What?” exclaims Katherine. “No. Ours was the best and we finished quicker.”
I swear Ash’s face falls too. Losing to Clive is a blow.
Theodora steps up to take over and shields her eyes to look into the crowd. “Clive? Could you collect your trophy on behalf of your team?”
“Sure,” he calls.
He’s here? I twist around in my seat. The latecomers sit on chairs at the very back of the rows, the three with legs outstretched and touching the chairs in front. Clive hauls himself to his feet and stomps along one of the aisles towards Theodora. As he passes, he winks at me and I shudder. I’ve noticed his gradual change in size and appearance, but never any change to his mind. The guy isn’t a thinker, but his thoughts are duller than usual.
Clive effortlessly jumps onto the dais, ignoring the two steps leading up and stands, legs slightly apart, as he seizes the mic in one massive hand.
“This is bullshit,” he calls.
“Clive!” exclaims Theodora, and she attempts to take the mic.
She manages to snatch it from him, and he steps away. “Gilgamesh will not return to the academy next term,” he yells.
“That is your choice,” retorts Sofia, “but you don’t speak for the whole house.”
“I don’t, but he does.” Clive points into the dim.
Every student turns in their seats. The missing
shifters are in a row at the back, close to the trees, and somebody new sits in the end seat Clive walked away from. The person in the seat rises and stands in the gap between his row and the Petrescu to his left.
Vincent.
I snap my head back to Ash, who grips the back of his chair, staring in shock.
“How is he here?” I ask Jamie as I shrink back in fear. “The Confederacy are looking for him.”
A speechless Jamie shakes his head at me.
“Thank you, Clive,” Vincent’s voice booms louder than Theodora’s did when she used the mic. He strides along the makeshift aisle and leaps onto the stage beside a smirking Clive. “I’m here on behalf of the shifter council and—"
“No. That’s bullshit,” shouts out Ash. “Can someone get hold of him?”
Vincent laughs. “No, and no.” He tips his chin and looks to the three Gilgamesh kids at the back. “Introduce yourselves.”
But that isn’t who he’s talking to. The world around erupts into instant chaos as other figures appear from the shadows, and these aren’t students—not in human form, anyway. The Walcott girls three rows back from me scream as wolves and bears launch themselves at the guards who flank the corners of our gathering. I watch in horror as they fall back, unable to fight against the surprise attack.
Vincent tips his chin and shouts over the growling, “Everybody into the academy or we’ll pick you off one by one.”
“I don’t think so,” Theodora yells at him and the furious lamia meets him face to face.
“Don’t make me shift, sweetheart,” he snarls. “You won’t have much chance against a dragon.”
Before she can react, Garrett seizes Theodora’s arm and pulls her back. “Everybody sit down!” she yells at the students out of their seats, who’re ready to follow Vincent’s instructions.
No. They can’t.
“Everybody move to the fucking academy,” shouts Vincent. “Gilgamesh—if you’re with me, stay here. If you’re witch and vampire-loving traitors, go with them.”
