“So?” Sophia stops talking. I open my eyes and look around the room. She’s already fully dressed in the same thing she was wearing only an hour ago.
“So what?” I ask.
“What do you think?”
“I don’t know, Sophia.” I shrug. I already told her what I thought, and she didn’t want to hear it.
“I really want to know.”
“I already told you what I thought,” I say. I’m trying to avoid actually saying the words, but all signs are pointing to the fact that this might be inevitable.
“I want to hear it again. If it’s still what you think,” she says cautiously. She’s no longer ranting. If I do this, I’m going to have to proceed with caution.
“I don’t know your mother, Sophia, but the woman I met today seemed fine to me. She seemed happy. Maybe she seems so different to you because she’s actually happy for once. She’s no longer worried about her cancer or dying. Maybe she’s just trying to live her life to the fullest.”
Sophia doesn’t say anything. I wait for her to process what I’ve said. Her face remains expressionless, and, after a while, I start to get worried that this was the wrong way to proceed. She’s not getting this. She’s not in agreement, and we’re going to get into another big fight. But then she surprises me.
“Maybe you’re right.” She shrugs. “I’m going to go downstairs and talk to her.”
That night at dinner, things between Sophia and Danielle are at a stalemate. Sophia spoke with her mother in private, and I don’t know what was said. All I know is that somehow things got worse. They are no longer fighting, but just ignoring each other.
Danielle was planning on leaving before dinner, but O, of course, got in the middle of it all and insisted that she stay.
“You can’t leave now, you just got here. Please stay for dinner. You must stay for dinner!” she said, grabbing her arm. Much to my and Sophia’s dismay, Danielle agreed.
Dinner becomes divided into two camps. Sophia only speaks to me and Danielle only speaks to O. O doesn’t bother to speak to Sophia, who I’m now convinced that she hates wholeheartedly, but she does speak to me. Sophia doesn’t speak to O nor her mother. I try to speak to both O and Danielle, but when I do, Sophia ignores me and stares at her plate.
Awful. Shitty. Ridiculous. All words that come to mind to describe this dinner, one of the worst ones of my life.
Finally, when the dessert comes, I see the light at the end of the tunnel. It’s almost over, I say to myself. You just gotta hang in there for half an hour more. Forty-five max.
“Ahem.” Danielle stands up and raises her glass. “I’d like to make a toast.”
O leans forward in her seat, exhibiting the eagerness of a first grader on her first day of school. Sophia, on the other hand, shrinks in her seat as if she wants to disappear.
“I would like to thank you, Opal, for being such a wonderful hostess. I know that I came without much of an announcement, but meeting you has been quite a treat.”
“No, please.” O blushes. “It has been my pleasure.”
“I would also like to thank you, Sophia. You aren’t as excited about me being here as I thought you would be, but nevertheless, it has been wonderful to see you again. I’ve really missed you, honey.”
I look closer and there are small tears pooling at the bottom of her eyes. Sophia looks at her, too.
“Thanks for coming,” she manages, which seems to be enough for her mom, who smiles widely.
“And finally, I would like to thank you, Jax.”
That’s unexpected.
“Thank me? For what?”
“For everything, of course. For my life. The money that you gave us. No, that you gave Sophia for my treatments. It has been a lifesaver in the truest sense.”
“What money?” O perks up.
“Oh, you know, the money that Jax gave me to pay for cancer treatments. Our insurance company refused to pay for the experimental treatment and, if it weren’t for that money, I’d be dead right now.”
I shake my head.
“No, I’m serious, Jax. I would be. You saved my life. And of course, I have to go back and thank my little Sophia for taking care of me during all of those years, and for finally getting out of the house, so that I had some space to date and find myself a man.”
“Mom.” Sophia shakes her head. But Danielle ignores her.
“I’m terribly sorry that my daughter is acting like this,” she says to Opal and me. “I’ve taught her to behave better than this, that’s for sure.”
“Oh, really? Is that what you did, mother? And when was that? When I gave up my future to stay home and work at some shitty diner to take care of you when you were dying of cancer? Or when I came here to pay off the debt for your cancer treatments?”
How did this nice toast suddenly get so out of hand?
“Debt? What debt?” O turns to me. “What is she talking about, Jax?”
She finally got it. I can’t believe it took her this long. But then again, she’s always been a bit slow.
Damn.
Fuck.
Shit.
How the fuck did this come out? Why didn’t Sophia keep her mouth shut?
“Nothing, no debt,” I mumble. My mind races to find just the right excuse that makes sense to this story.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
No one says anything for a few moments.
“I don’t understand,” O says. “How much money did you give them exactly?”
“Not much.” I shrug.
“Oh my God, no! It was a lot, O,” Danielle insists. Fuck her. Fuck her!! I want to scream.
“But how much exactly?” O asks.
“You didn’t tell her?” Danielle turns to me. “You were so generous and you didn’t brag about it? O, it was $250,000. Can you believe that? It was more money than I’ve ever seen. And your wonderful brother, he just wrote Sophia a check after meeting her only a few times. His heart is so big.”
I can see the anger building within O. She purses her lips. Narrows her eyes. “That’s definitely one way of putting it.”
“What? Whatever you’re going to say, just say it already, O. Come on out with it.” I can’t stand this anymore.
“Oh, you want me to just say it? Okay. Fine. What about me?”
“What about you?”
“You knew that I needed money. That mom and dad cut me off. And instead, you just chose to give that money away to strangers. How could you?”
“They needed it for something better, O. All you would do is go shopping and party.”
“Fuck you, Jax! I’m your sister. Who cares what the hell some strangers in a diner need the money for? That’s their problem. This money, it’s our money. Our family’s money. And you had no right to give it away just to get some pussy.”
“That’s not why I did it.”
“I don’t care!!” O is hysterical. She’s walking around, pacing, screaming. I’m keeping my distance. I feel like she’s going to explode at any minute.
Chapter 29 - Jax
After the fight…
O and I continue to scream at each other. It’s like we’re children again. Nothing matters now, but to yell at each other. Whoever says the meanest, loudest thing wins. Wins what, though? Neither of us knows.
“I can’t believe you did this for her!” O’s face is flushed. She feels like she’s losing. I know because she always starts to bring other people into the fight when she feels like she’s losing ground.
“What’s wrong with her?” I ask. “She’s perfect.”
I say it. I mean it. I glance over at Sophia. She smiles.
“She’s white trash!” O screams. “Trash! Trash!”
“Fuck you, Opal!” Sophia pipes in. I don’t want her to be a part of this, but she already is.
“Who the hell do you think you’re calling trash?”
“You, you bitch!”
O puts her hands on her hips. She thinks she�
�s gaining ground. Her attention is diverted to someone weaker. Someone without a strong position. Or so she thinks. I look over at Sophia. Her face is expressionless. Her eyes are unflinching. It’s like she has something on O. She knows something she shouldn’t.
“At least I’m not the one who’s pregnant. And unmarried. Single. Am I right, Opal?”
Pregnant! What the hell is she talking about? O’s not pregnant.
“What’s she talking about, O?”
I wait for O to fight back. Tell Sophia to shut up, send her to hell. But she doesn’t. Instead, she breaks down. Her legs buckle under her and she drops to the floor.
“O!” I go to her and wrap my arms around her. I’ve never seen O this fragile. At least, not since her boyfriend killed himself the day before their prom.
“What the fuck are you talking about, Sophia?”
“It’s true.” She shrugs. I hate how cold she is. A few moments ago, I felt nothing but love and warmth for her. But now, all that’s gone.
“It’s true,” Sophia insists. “Isn’t it, O?”
I’ve never heard her call O that, and I hate the way she says it.
“O?” I ask. Her face is buried in my shoulders. She’s sobbing.
“Yes,” she mumbles. “I think so.”
I continue to hold her. Sophia stares at me. Something in her eyes tells me that she’s sorry. I pull away from O and she stands up on her own two feet.
“Tell me what happened.”
“He left. He left me,” she sobs. “And your girlfriend has no right to go through my bags!”
“Yes, I do! You were the one who told me to put all your shit away because you’re such a princess that you couldn’t do it yourself.”
“Sophia, please,” I say.
“You’re telling me to be quiet?” Sophia gasps.
“Yes, I am. Can’t you see that O’s having a difficult time here?”
“I can’t believe you’re taking her side!”
“I’m not taking anyone’s side. There are no sides. There’s just this crazy situation that I just heard about,” I say.
I turn to O. “How did this happen? Why?”
But she doesn’t say a word. Instead, she sobs and buries her face in her hands. I fuckin’ knew it. I knew it. O’s ex, if you can call him that, was such an asshole. He was a ruthless playboy that cheated on her incessantly and told her he loved her.
“I just don’t understand what you saw in him, O. He was such a dick.”
She shrugs and continues to cry.
The three of us stand in a semi-circle, unsure as to what to do. Danielle sits motionless at the table.
Finally, I turn to Sophia.
“How long did you know?” I ask.
“Ever since I unpacked her bags the other day. I was going to keep this private, but…”
“You had no right to keep it private,” I say. I don’t know why I said that. When Sophia’s eyes grow big with astonishment and shock, I want to take those words back immediately, but I can’t.
“What are you talking about?” Sophia crosses her arms across her chest.
“Nothing.” I shrug.
“This wasn’t even her news to reveal! You bitch,” O hisses.
“Okay, I’ve had enough of this.” Sophia throws her hands up and turns to leave the room.
“Where are you going, darling?” Danielle walks after her.
“I need to get out of here.”
Danielle follows her out, leaving O and me alone in the room. I turn to her. I don’t know what to say. I want to yell at her for being so stupid. How could she just get pregnant like this with that moron’s baby? And is she planning on keeping it? What will our parents say?
But she looks at me with her large puppy dog eyes, and I can’t do any of those things. All I see is my sister and that she’s lost. Alone. Scared. Terrified, probably. I would be, and I wouldn’t even be the one who’s pregnant.
“Are you okay?” I ask quietly. “Can I get you something?”
She shakes her head no. She sits back down. I look her over, up and down. I look for signs of pregnancy, but there are none. Except that she didn’t drink this evening. Strange. I didn’t notice that before.
“I hate that girl,” she says. I sigh.
“You two just got off to a bad start. You came in here ordering her around. What did you think was going to happen?”
“I thought she was the fuckin’ help, Jax. How was I supposed to know that she’s your girlfriend? You said that she worked here.”
“She does. But that’s not all she is. I don’t know. It’s complicated.”
She smiles. I don’t remember the last time I saw that beautiful smile. It puts me at ease.
“Tell me about it,” she says, rubbing her non-existent belly.
I ask her about the father. At first, she doesn’t want to talk, but eventually she caves. They have been on and off for two years. This happened during one of the on-times.
“At least he’s got money,” I say.
She shrugs. “I don’t care about the money.”
I look around the room. Frantically, as if I’m searching for something.
“What’s wrong?” she asks.
“I’m just looking for my sister. Because this girl in front of me who said that she doesn’t care about money, that can’t possibly be my sister.”
“Oh, shut up.” O laughs. I’m glad that I’m still able to make her laugh. “I’ve grown up. I’m going to be a mom.”
“So I heard.”
“She had no right to tell you. That’s why I got so mad at her. That and my hormones are all out of whack now.”
“I know.” I nod. “But she did. So what? Do you want me to keep your secret for you?”
Chapter 30 - Jax
When she leaves…
“Yes.” She nods. “I just can’t tell anyone else yet. I can’t have Mom and Dad finding out. Not before I decide what to do about all this.”
“Oh, so you’re not decided?” I ask.
“Don’t get so excited. I’m pretty sure I’m going to keep it. I just need some time. I’m not sure how to break it to them quite yet. I need time.”
I nod. I understand. Mom and Dad are difficult people to break things to. They have so many standards and rules. Plus, they are way too easily disappointed by their children. Whenever you present them with a new idea, it’s very important to have an answer for everything. And with this whole situation, they will eat her alive.
“Will you help me?” O asks. “Help me come up with a plan?”
I smile and nod. Not sure what kind of plan we can come up with, but some sort of plan would be better than nothing. I know that for sure.
“You owe me,” she adds.
“Owe you for what?”
“For giving away a quarter of a million dollars to some stranger.” The tone of her voice shows that she’s joking, but not really.
“It was for a good cause.”
“Oh, please.” O rolls her eyes. “Good cause, my ass. If that had been some guy with a humpback and his mother was dying, you wouldn’t give two shits about them.”
I roll my eyes. Shrug. Shake my head no. But we both know that she’s right.
“Just tell me one thing, okay?”
“What?”
“Why her? What’s so special about her?”
I think about it for a moment. I want to say it’s because she’s the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen. Or the funniest. Or the wittiest. But none of those things are true.
“She was the only one who said no. A couple of times, too. And then, I just had to have her.”
O throws her head back and laughs. “You guys are all the same.”
I nod in agreement. Perhaps, we are.
“Okay, so? Now that you had her? Was she worth it?”
“Yes,” I say immediately. “Yes, she was.” I would say that to O anyway, even if Sophia wasn’t worth it, but it’s not a lie. Everything in my body says that I’m ri
ght. That what we have has been right and good and perfect.
“So now that you know the truth, that Sophia and I are the real thing, you’re going to have to treat her a little better. A lot better.”
O laughs and rolls her eyes, but agrees.
Before leaving, Sophia’s mother stops by to bid us goodbye. I’m not sad to have her go, but I’m surprised that she’s leaving so soon. I invite her to stay half-heartedly, but she insists that she must go. Luke is waiting for her. She has a plane to catch out of LAX. Our goodbye is short. She thanks me again for the money and shakes my hand. She congratulates O on her pregnancy, tells her to not worry and call her at any time if she has any concerns. O agrees and, by the tone of her voice, I know that she actually might. It’s odd how well O and Danielle connected. O isn’t one to make friends easily with other women. The closeness that I see between them reminds me of how far apart O is from our own mother. But then again, relationships between mothers and daughters are often difficult and treacherous. My mother barely spoke two words to my grandmother, and I have hardly anything to say to my father.
“What about Sophia? Should I call her down?” I ask.
“Oh, no, there’s no need. We already said our goodbyes. It was a pleasure to meet you both.”
After Danielle leaves, I go upstairs to see Sophia. Something doesn’t feel right. I call her name going up the stairs, but she doesn’t reply. I say it again when I knock on her door. But again I hear nothing.
“Sophia?” I ask, opening the door. “Are you okay? Your mom just left.”
Her bags lay open on her bed. They are half full of clothes and she sits on her bed facing the window. She doesn’t turn around, but as I get closer, I can see that she has been crying. Her eyes are puffy. Her makeup is smeared and her cheeks are red.
“What’s wrong? Are you okay?”
She shakes her head no. She opens her mouth to say something but gets choked up by her tears.
“Why are your bags out? Where are you going?”
She takes a moment to gather herself. She stands up and wipes away her tears. “I’m leaving,” she says.
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