I heard more screaming; Kendra?
Light exploded, and someone shouted for Lucian, and my instincts said to get up. To fight. I rolled onto my stomach as I watched Katarina slapping Hades as he drove his fist into Lucifer repeatedly. They disappeared after Hades shouted something to Lucian, but he wasn’t listening. His midnight eyes watched as I struggled to get up.
Katarina moved her assault on me, kicking me and screaming blurred words that I couldn’t hear through the drums beating in my ears. Everything sounded far away, even my own cries as she kicked me. Sound came back at a deafening roar and I grabbed her foot, pulling her down.
I got to my feet, barely. My body felt wrong, and my hand touched my head, coming back covered in blood. My skull felt soft, broken. I watched as Katarina got to her feet and stumbled towards her. My first attempt to get her was clumsy, as if I’d drunk too much whisky. I lunged again, letting the darkness take a little more control than it ever had before.
Lucian spoke to Katarina, distracting her as I moved closer on clumsy feet, my equilibrium fucked.
“Let me help you, Katarina. We can be together again, but this time free of the seal,” he murmured, and tears swam in my vision. “We can kill her and make you whole again, and we can have a child together. We can be everything you ever wanted.”
“You kill me every time! In every life! Do you know how frustrating it is to discover who I am and who you were to me, only for you to strangle the life out of me the moment I do? I loved you more than life and you, you killed me. That wasn’t enough for you, you couldn’t let me go. Instead, you cursed me to relive this one, this cursed life where I fall in love with you and then you murder me. This time, though,” she seethed. “This time, I get here and you don’t even notice me. You go for her, everything that was wrong in me that I put in her because that is what you love, and it’s why you love her! She’s just a piece of me. You didn’t even look at me when I threw myself at you. I came to you naked last night and you threw me out of your room because I wasn’t your precious Lena. Well, look at her now! Is she still everything you wanted?” She laughed.
I lunged without thought. I grabbed the sides of her face, capturing it as I held on to her with everything I had.
“Kendra,” I mumbled, unable to get words to come out right. I let a little more darkness in. “Kendra, please.”
“She’s gone, you stupid whore!” Katarina screeched as she struggled to get away.
“Kendra!” I screamed, and it echoed through the clearing, bouncing off the mountaintops as I started to fall to the ground, losing my hold. I pushed everything I had into the words, the spell, fighting for Kendra to come back, even if only for a moment.
“Lena,” she whispered as she held me up. Her gaze looked at my face and she turned white. “Oh my God, Lena, what did they do to you?” she whimpered.
“I’m…fine,” I uttered as I held on to her.
“I knew you would know it wasn’t me,” she whispered as tears rolled down her cheeks. “I knew you would be able to tell. I couldn’t fight her. I’m so sorry for the things she said to you, they weren’t true.”
“We don’t have time for that, Kendra. I need you to listen to me. We’re not both making it out of here alive,” I mumbled brokenly. “I love you. I love you so much,” I cried as I leaned against her for strength. “We have to take care of Mom, you understand?”
“You will,” she said softly. “You can’t separate me from her; you will live, Lena. I love you more than life. I understand what you have to do. Tell them I love them, all of them. You will be okay; I will stay with you, always.”
“Kendra, I’m so sorry,” I sobbed as my hands held on, knowing the moment I stopped holding on, she’d be gone from me.
“I understand; it is okay. I know what you have to do,” she replied through tears. “It’s okay, it will be okay.”
“No!” my mom screamed, and I couldn’t look at her. I didn’t have the strength to do what I had to do and look at her. She was losing a daughter tonight. “Lena, you stop! Get away from her, she’s your sister!” Mom screamed through the pain as she figured out what was happening.
“I have to end the game,” I said softly. I felt blood dripping from my lips. My body was going numb; if I was going to have the strength to end the game once and for all, I had to do it soon.
“You’re going to be a mama,” she said as a giant sob tore through her. “You tell him I loved him, that I would have been the best aunt in the world. You tell him about me, Lena. Promise me?”
“He’ll know,” I said as I started to falter, only for her to help me stand. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry I didn’t realize it sooner.”
“I don’t blame you, for anything. I know what she said, but you didn’t know. I never blamed you. When you think of me, know I’m with Joshua and that I’m okay. I love you, Lena. You’re not just a piece of that bitch, you’re my other half. You’re my sister.”
“I can’t fight her off any longer,” I sobbed as I tried to hold on. “I love you, I’ll always love you. Death isn’t the end, Kendra. You will be okay,” I whispered as I stepped back, swaying on my feet.
Katarina backed up, screeching as she took control. “You stupid bitch, you can’t kill me!”
* ~*~*
~Lucian
I watched, unable to pass the fucking protection barrier. Lena’s head was bad, so fucking bad that if we couldn’t get to her soon, she’d die. She’d somehow managed to get to her feet, but I could feel her fading, unable to get to her. My heart pounded for the first time since I could remember. My chest ached as I screamed out in frustration.
“Katarina, come to me. I can help you,” I lied, my throat clenching against the blood that was trailing down from Lena’s head wound. I’d watched her with Lucifer, fighting to survive, and those around had felt the world tremble at my anger, felt it quake in my presence.
I paced the line, watching as Lena backed away and turned towards her mother. She was going to kill her sister, and then she’d want me dead when I told her of the child and what it held. She’d hate me, and this fucked up game would replay because now it’s inside of her. My child, my child held a monster inside of him. He held my seal in his tiny form, already being overtaken by it before he ever got to draw a breath.
My eyes burned and I lifted my hand, pulling it away after I’d wiped whatever the fuck was on it. I stared at the moisture, blinking.
“Look away!” Lena whispered and I turned, looking at her mother who already hated her for what she’d become even though she tried hard not to. She’d hate her for what she was going to do: free her sister. “Please look away,” she begged brokenly, and her gaze skimmed over me. “Make them look away!” she screamed, and Alden moved into action, pulling Fiona against his chest. She fought against it, slapping him as she struggled to get away to see what was happening with her children.
My gaze slowly drifted back to Lena, who nodded softly at her grandmother and then almost collapsed from the small motion. Her hand slipped into her skirt’s pocket and she stood taller, prouder as she faced Katarina.
Spyder inched closer, as if he’d catch her once she fell. She wouldn’t fall; she was Magdalena, fierce and strong even though everything was stacked against her.
“Lena,” I whispered, and her gaze lowered to the ground before her eyes lifted to me and held mine. Her pupils were blown, but the look in her eyes made my stomach churn with unease.
“You think you can kill me?” Katarina growled as she seethed her anger at Lena. “You can’t even fucking stand up! You ruined everything. You are nothing; without my soul, you are empty and devoid of life. You were created to die; you’re not even worth the air you breathe.”
“I don’t have to kill you, Katarina,” Lena whispered as she tore her gaze from mine and lifted her head.
“
The only way you can kill me is if you…you can’t!” Katarina screeched as she watched Lena in horror.
“I win. Lucian will not kill our child, and you will no longer control my sister. This ends here, now. You will never be reborn to hurt any other witch ever again,” Lena brought the knife up to her neck.
“No!” I screamed, sending the world tilting as anger pulsed through me.
The blade slit through her flesh, opening her neck to the bone. The knife dropped to the ground, bouncing against it. I struggled to remain upright as I watched her hands grasp at her neck. Her legs gave out and she hit the ground, kneeling on them. Her body crashed against it as her blood seeped into the ground.
“Let me in!” I demanded, but it was still Katarina in the body. She took in the morbid scene before her; Lena was gasping and making noises, but it was the only thing coming out as blood bubbled from her lips.
“Lena!” Kendra screamed as she rushed to where Lena was on the ground. “No, stay with me, oh, God, stay with me. This wasn’t the plan,” she sobbed as she picked up Lena and rocked her in her arms. The coven was silent, everyone in shock; no one was putting it together. Lena’s hand touched the ground as her eyes fell vacant, lifeless. I screamed as I fought the protection barrier, and then Spyder was kneeling, pleading to Kendra to bring Lena to us.
The moment she’d been moved out of the circle, I fell to my knees, holding her as Vlad sliced his wrist and pushed it against her mouth. It was useless, she was gone. The moment the soul expired, she died. Tears formed in my vision and I buried my face against her blood-covered chest as the Fae and everyone worked to save her. The witches chanted, Kendra screamed hysterically, pissed that she was still here, but her sister wasn’t.
Lena gave her life to save her. She gave her life to keep me from killing our child. She knew she wasn’t living, and she was aware that half her head was crushed. She’d shielded Kendra and everyone from seeing it. She’d fooled them all.
“She’s not coming back,” I muttered as I lifted my head, pushing Vlad away. “She has no soul. She can’t be saved,” I said, but they continued to try. “Get the fuck off her!” I snapped, watching as Spyder touched my shoulder; he’d felt it too. The bond was gone. It had left with her. I knew I’d feel it if she was lingering, but she left us. She freed me, but the cost for it was her life, and I’d have played this game until the end of time to spare it.
“Lucian, she has to be shrouded in the cloth of purity,” her grandmother whispered as she stood mere feet from me.
“She’s gone, there is no rebirth for her,” I growled coldly. “She released the little bit of her soul Katarina planted, and in doing so, she can never be reborn. She can never come back. She’s just fucking gone.”
“I’m aware of it, but that of the child she freed isn’t. It deserves to be buried and have a chance at life, whenever Hecate chooses it.”
“Fuck Hecate,” I snarled. “The child is mine; it holds something I have to get back.”
“No, it doesn’t. We placed runes upon her skin to free the innocent soul from the seal. It is dormant inside of her body. It has no soul to attach to. Lena knew she would die when she came here; the sand foretold her death. She made a choice to save her family and protect you, so let us finish what she started. Let her not die in vain.”
“She knew she would die and she still came?” I demanded.
“It was her choice to make,” she said, her tears running freely down her cheeks as I rocked Lena’s lifeless body. “She told me to tell you if it should come to pass, that some love is worth dying for. That she gave her life so that you would be free, and that every curse upon your skin will leave with her death. Katarina is no more, nor can she ever be born again. Her soul is fractured. She cannot ever be reborn. You are free of her forever.”
“That was my price to pay,” I seethed.
“And you are paying for it,” she pointed out. “You should respect her sacrifice, for you are not the only one who is mourning her.”
My face turned to her mother, who was screaming against Alden’s chest as he held onto her. Kendra was numb, staring down at her sister’s lifeless corpse. Her friends remained off in the distance, hugging each other as they cried without care of who saw them.
I stood, carrying her with me. “You can place the shroud around her, but I’m not leaving her fucking side until she’s placed in the ground. I don’t give a fuck about your traditions or laws; I’m not leaving her alone.”
Chapter 37
~Kendra Fitzgerald
They say dying is hard, but it’s not those who leave us who are forced to go on living. They’re just gone, finished, their story ends. Fuck people who say that. Living is harder, waking up every morning and pretending that life is normal. Somehow we do it, we rise and place one foot in front of the other. We pretend that there isn’t a void inside of us, a place that died with the one we loved.
Others expected us to get over the grief, but for me, it was as if I was missing a piece of myself. My other half had just ceased to exist.
They told us that she’d want us to be happy, but how the fuck would they know? Grieving was normal, it was the hearts way of reminding us that she’d been loved. It was the price we paid for loving them so much that we could never fully let them go. It was how we kept them alive inside of us, that pain; it reminded us that they’d lived.
I’d stayed away from the main hall for the most part, walking through the empty halls like a ghost as I worked through everything that had happened. I hated their pity, their looks of sadness as they whispered behind their hands of what she’d been, or what she’d done.
They had no idea of what she was, or who she was. She was my sister, the most powerful witch in our coven because, unlike us, she hadn’t had a soul to hold her back. She’d been a conduit of magic, an endless force that couldn’t be held back by mortal limitations. Not like the rest of us, no; she’d been fearless in her own right. She’d been selfless in both loving us and protecting us.
Day after day I’d wanted to lie beside her and just give up. I was tired of pretending that her loss wasn’t tearing me to bits and pieces.
Grief didn’t get easier; that was a lie to appease those left behind. You got stronger; you found ways of living with the never-ending pain in your chest. You learned to breathe again, to draw air into your lungs even though it hurt to do so. Lena had said it once, that death broke you, it stole a piece of you when it visited, and she’d been right. She’d stared down at Joshua’s casket when they’d carried it in for the service and said, “Fuck death; it fucks the living more than the dead. Life ends, it isn’t the dying who hurt, it’s the ones we leave behind.”
The day she died it had taken them hours to cease trying to save her as Lucian held her corpse. They’d tried everything from magic to vampire blood to bring her back. He’d fought against them, screaming as they tried to take her from him. In the end, only their unborn child’s soul swayed his hand. He released her body, and yet he’d refused to leave her side even now. Days had passed as the child’s soulless body was purified with his mother’s.
Lena would never be reborn. Only one soul had been allowed to find passage with the spell they’d cast, she’d given it to her child. She’d taken what little chance she had at being reborn and sealed her fate. Of course, she’d sealed Katarina’s in the process. She’d freed Lucian, something he hadn’t been able to do himself.
I’d stood with him as her body had been cleaned of the blood, revealing the extent of her injuries. She’d known she was dying, she had to have. The entire back of her head had been cracked open. Both pupils had been fully dilated, revealing a massive hemorrhage. How she’d managed to end the game was a testament of her strength and desire to free both Lucian and me from Katarina’s clutches. I’d watched as the runes were revealed, something she’d allowed Grandmother to do before she’d left the
club, knowing that she’d never return to it.
Lucian had worried about the child being alive inside of her womb up until that point. He’d given a short explanation of what she’d held inside of her. She’d held pure evil inside of her that not only opened the gates to other worlds, but tore through them, destroying everything that was good. Somehow, even with it inside of her, she’d remained pure. She’d remained devoted to those she’d loved.
Lena had been a bright light in a world filled with darkness, and somehow, she’d shined brighter than any of us.
I was angry at her for it, for taking the choice away from me. She’d fooled us all, made us think that I wouldn’t survive, and then she’d done it. She’d taken her life and with it the light she held.
Lena was buried beside Joshua beneath the giant oak that lined the property. There was no music to lessen the blow or lighten the crowd that had gathered. Her casket was carried by Lucian and his men, placed upon the ground beside where she would be buried. The coven chanted for her soulless body to find peace in any way it could. She’d given her life for mine, and I’d never forgive her for it. Lucian had placed her beside Joshua’s memorial and then moved to stand at a distance. No one followed him, but like me, he was probably angry that she’d made the choices for us.
As coven law dictated, Magdalena Fitzgerald would be removed from the history, fading away into the past as so many before her had. My hands slid to my belly and I wondered if Hecate would bless me with a daughter, one as strong as my sister had been.
“Kendra, it’s time,” my mother said as she placed a gentle hand on my shoulder. She had gone into a deep depression with Lena’s death, but then we’d known she would. Not even Alden could bring her out of it. It had only been two weeks since she’d died, and in all that time, Lucian had remained true to his word, never leaving her. It was as if he expected her to wake from a deep slumber, or maybe turn into something else.
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