Discovery

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Discovery Page 65

by Douglas E Roff

“I could arouse you myself, you know.”

  “Is everything in your world about sex?”

  “Everything in everyone’s world is about sex, in one way or another. That’s an inescapable and fundamental fact. We exist to procreate. Everything else flows from that.”

  “Freud?”

  “Fuck no. Pure Misti. I just happen to like sex. A lot.”

  ***

  Two hours passed at regular speed and by the time Misti walked through the front door, Adam was conscious and in the kitchen.

  “Something smells good. Whatcha cookin’?”

  “A little pasta dish I learned about on one of my travels with Dad. Very tasty and easy to make. A little boneless chicken, a little lemon, some sifted flour and some herbs and spices and bingo, you have part of a dish. Then the pasta, made just right al dente and some white sauce, which is easier to make than you think, and bing, bang, boom, we have dinner. A small tossed salad, which I will toss, some fresh baked bread, or rolls, some butter and a little sparking water …”

  “No wine?”

  “Sometimes we must compromise perfection when we wish to be a fake Italian. I myself am willing to sacrifice the otherwise obligatory wine. Alas, I do not drink myself. But in the future, please feel free. I put no curbs on your journey to becoming a full-fledged Italian.”

  “I thought Mexican was your favorite?”

  “It is. And so is Chinese and so is American. But diversity in all things is indeed the spice of life. I love food and, I dare say, food loves me right back. So, have a seat so we can eat and talk. How was ju-jitsu?”

  “The dream may be over in the family. The girls don’t want to fight. They want to dance, or swim or play soccer. They want their Barbie’s.”

  “Yeah, just wait ‘til Grampa Edward hears that. He’ll have them at the Krav Maga studio in Vancouver soon enough. Dad isn’t going to let the girls go girly girl on him. You wait and see. The girls will fight. Just maybe not today.”

  “I guess. We’ll see though. Cindy won’t let Edward bully her like he does the rest of us. She’s wickedly tough, mentally strong and fully aware of the ‘Edward effect’. Not sure in a contest of wills that he has a chance. But maybe.”

  “C’mon wife, have a seat and let’s eat. Then, I will tell you all about my special super powers …”

  “Oh, God. Not that again. Getting laid isn’t a super power. I’m your wife.” Misti laughed.

  “You mock me, but we’ll see for how long, woman. Then you’re mine, all mine I say.” Adam laughed the creepy mad scientist laugh, which Misti playfully ignored.

  “Ummm. This is good. Who made this?”

  “Your wedding day mega rock just got smaller. Keep it up and you’ll be heading for CZ territory.”

  “Yeah right. Five minutes alone with you in the other room and it’ll be half a carat larger.”

  “Confident, aren’t we. And a little cocky.”

  “Nope. I just love my man and know how to manage him, that’s all.”

  “Manage? Me? I really doubt it. I’m immune to your wily charms woman. I’m an Alpha Male.”

  “Of course, you are sweetie. Now pass the butter. And this is good, too. I’m a lucky girl.”

  “Finally, the truth is revealed!”

  ***

  “So, what is it that Edward doesn’t know about your super power? What haven’t you told him, exactly?”

  “I suppose Dad gave you the whole eidetic memory, hyperthymesia, photographic memory speech nonsense?”

  “Not nonsense, but yes he did.”

  “Well, let’s cut to the chase then. I don’t have eidetic memory because I’m not a child. I don’t have hyperthymesia because I can remember anything but external data. So, it isn’t that either. And I don’t have a photographic memory because that doesn’t really exist anyway. Except in the movies and fiction novels.”

  “Leaving you as a mnemonist. It’s the only other plausible explanation, according to Edward.”

  “And no, it isn’t. This is an example of taking one fact that cannot easily be explained with modern medicine, brain physiology or psychiatry and trying to jam into what is known or believed to be known. The fact is, nobody except me knows what this actually is and I’m not tellin’ anyone. Except you, of course.

  “Of course.”

  “I think some of Dad’s friends would like to get some brain tissue samples for the microscope but that is definitely not ever happinin’. No joke, I thought Dad was going to let them drill. Mom had to intervene and put a stop to that.”

  “Thank God.”

  “So, the situation is very complex, and I don’t claim to understand how this came about or what it is in scientific terms. But I do know how it works and I know how to use it. And it is very bizarre.”

  “I’m wet with suspense.”

  “Hold that thought. But the deal here is very simple. I can store and recall vast amounts of information that I store away logically. Like files on a computer. It is like the Method of Loci, but it really isn’t that. It simply is. I can tell myself to remember something, and I do. I tell, myself to forget something and I do that too. I can direct data from one place or another and even locate it in several different places. Method of Loci, right?”

  “I guess.”

  “Nope. It isn’t that because once I tell myself something, I don’t know where it goes, only that it is out of my immediate thought process. I assume it redirects somehow to my unconscious mind. I have never consciously trained myself ever. So, in truth, I was gifted with this ability. By whom and for what purpose, I do not know.”

  “And?”

  “And there’s one more thing. And this is the fun part. I have found a way to consciously access my unconscious mind and all the crazy shit that goes on in there.”

  “That’s not possible, is it?”

  “Maybe not but then I can do it at will. There seems to have been an error or two in the development of my neural pathways. Something went off course and this is what I got. Maybe someone else got autism or the DNA for musical genius or mathematical prowess. But whatever went wrong with me gave me all these crazy other talents. And there’s more.”

  “More?”

  “I can access other parts of my brain too. Parts that none of us might want or need. Some parts are primal and dark. Other parts let me travel inside.”

  “Inside what? Travel where?”

  “I can travel and visit my entire mind. I can see it, like an exhibit at an art gallery. I know how my mind and brain works together and I’ve seen them both in detail and close up.”

  “You’re scaring me, Adam.”

  “It shouldn’t. Somewhere around six or seven years ago, I learned finally how to control everything after years of trying to learn how. I’ve been mostly in control of my processes since I was a teen, but it isn’t easy reining in the bits that want to elude you down in the boiler room.”

  “Boiler room?”

  “My un-conscious. The place where I do my best work. My workshop, my inner sanctum and my playroom. When I tune out, that’s where I go.”

  “Why not tell Edward? Why not tell the world? This is … news.”

  “Exactly. It is news and news that is private. To me. For me. I don’t want the attention or anyone asking for time to study me. I’m not a lab rat and they won’t be allowed anywhere near my brain.”

  “But something this huge should be studied. Or written down or something.”

  “It is. By the only researcher that can carry out the study safely. Me. And me alone.”

  “What can I do to help?”

  “Easy. Love me. Help me. Be my best friend. Watch over and protect me. Distract me. Occupy me. Edward is right about one thing. You are the missing part of my life that allows me to carry on in this baffling world that I have such difficulty understanding. Now the last piece of the puzzle has fallen into place, and I can finally share myself, my entire self, without worryi
ng about one thing or another. Without hiding or lying or dissembling. Without being my father. I have a lot more to tell you and we have a lifetime to figure all of this out. But this is where we start.”

  “Super power, eh?”

  “Something like that. Can’t fuck people up like you and can’t cope with my surroundings very well, at least not yet. But I can improve and learn how to be happy. Or at least happier. I can do more things because I’m with you. I can be myself because I’m with you. Everything I hope to become is because of you.”

  “No pressure.”

  “None. Let it loose Misti, let it all out now. I am and I will. It’s a new world for you and for me. Only we can take this journey and neither of us can go alone.”

  “You want to explore my darkness? My dark places?”

  “Every bit and every experience, every thought and every emotion. Every dark place and good deed, as well as the depths you have never wished to explore. We can go there. Together and look at each item in the grocery store, then decide how to use it. Or put it back on the shelf for later.”

  “There are things that I have wanted to do, things I have done that are just not right. Even I know that. You can’t help me with my own demons. Nobody can.”

  “That’s where you’re wrong. And if you will learn to trust me, I can help you make sense of it in ways you cannot imagine. Can you do that?”

  “I don’t know. I don’t know how, or even where to begin. Do you?”

  “Yes; yes, I do. And I’ll do one other thing for you. And this is the best part of all.”

  “Don’t scare me anymore. This all sounds like crazy talk.”

  “I know. It is crazy talk, unless I can do what I said. Then it isn’t crazy; it’s real.”

  “Then what else is there?”

  “I can experience … something. I think it’s God.”

  “Right. If you say so.” This was a bridge too far for Misti.

  “Tomorrow morning when we wake up, I want you to remember this conversation. Your doubt and your anxiety. It’s OK. But in the morning, you will know, not believe or understand, but know I am not making this up.”

  “How?”

  “We’ll do a little experiment tonight and then you tell me what you think tomorrow. No drugs, no chemistry, no machines. Sleep with me tonight and we’ll talk again tomorrow.”

  “No funny business. Just go to bed.”

  “Sex would be nice. It’s a gateway.”

  “Liar!”

  “Alright, I made that up. But the rest of it’s true.”

  “We’ll see.”

  “Being a mom again?”

  “Not with you. Getting ready for that litter of kids you promised. You can never practice being a mom too soon or too often. Kid management is not gonna be easy in our Clan.”

  ***

  Adam arose early the next day, as was his practice. Misti stayed in bed for hours longer than usual and only got up in the early afternoon. She dragged herself into the kitchen, where Adam was seated at the kitchen table reading manuscripts.

  “Do I look as bad as I feel?”

  “A little. Interesting hair style and I think your PJs are on backwards. Did I do that?”

  “You wish. Was it the sex or that other thing you did?”

  “The hair might have been me. I mean, I was some-body last night, if you know what I mean. You seemed to be into it at the time.”

  “I feel. I feel like someone sucked everything out of my brain last night. Hell, even now I just … hurts. I hurt.”

  “I can make it unhurt. Come here.”

  “What are you going to do? Not that shit you did last night.”

  “Come here, you little baby. I’ll make the hurt go away.”

  Misti came over and sat on Adam’s lap, as he held her close and gave her a sweet and gentle kiss.

  “Close your eyes. Now clear your mind like I taught you last night.”

  “OK.”

  “Now …”

  “Oh! Oooohhhh. Yes! That was an …”

  “Orgasm? Yes. Headache gone?”

  “You have to teach me that one.”

  “Never! What would you need me for then?”

  “Everything.”

  Chapter 64

  “I didn’t say that. Not exactly.”

  “Then what did you say? Exactly.” Misti was trying hard to be pleasant and engaging but failing badly. Adam noted that whatever it was that she was working on had captured Misti’s full attention and concentration. That she carried on a separate conversation with Adam and wasn’t listening was beginning to annoy him.

  Adam stood in the doorway of Misti’s second floor home office, as she hunched over her desk examining a primary document with a 10x lens. She had been wrestling with a particularly difficult translation of a new Gens document all morning and was trying to meet a deadline. Adam wasn’t helping and had become an unwelcome distraction.

  “I said that … are you even listening?”

  “Doing my best. I have a translation due tomorrow morning for a conference call. With Edward and some of his buddies at Berkeley. I’m sure this ability of yours is fascinating and important. I get that. But can’t we talk about it later?”

  “This is vastly more important than your teatime call with some stiffs. This actually matters.”

  “And my stuff doesn’t? Someone’s full of his oats today.”

  Adam was impatient. “Look, I can finish that for you while we talk. Give it here.” He reached out for the document. “C’mon hand it over.”

  “What on earth are your babbling about now? How are you going to translate this while we chat? I am having trouble with this. I don’t see how you can …”

  “Gimme. I wrote a new program. I was going to surprise you but now that’s spoiled. I need your full attention. So, hand it over.”

  “I think you just made that up, so I’ll pay attention to you. You’re worse than the girls on their worst day. You should know better.”

  “Do you want my help or not? I’m leaving in five-four-three …”

  “Seriously? OK, here. But the translation had better be good. I still have to check it.”

  “Check my work? Hardly seems necessary.”

  “Sweetie, you’re a genius but you aren’t perfect. Humor me.”

  Adam took the document, which was about seven pages with diagrams and formulas. “Should take about fifteen minutes. Maybe half an hour, tops. Then you can thank me properly.”

  “Didn’t I already thank you already – twice – this morning?”

  “That was then. This is now.”

  “As you were saying.”

  “I was saying that since I was seven I have been trying to ascertain exactly how my ability …”

  “Your superpower …”

  “How my memory ability actually works. I’ve been working with my own team on two fronts. First is understanding what my ability is and how to control it. And then how it actually works.”

  “Aren’t they the same?”

  “No. I know I have this ability and can use it sometimes for little parlor tricks. But I don’t understand it at all.”

  “Who’s this team then? MIT, Harvard, Chicago, Stanford?”

  “A guru in India and a Tibetan monk. This isn’t academic, this is real world stuff. Way beyond academic.”

  “What does your Dad think about your … team?”

  “Dad knows nothing and will never be allowed to know anything about this. He wanted to drill my head for answers. I don’t think the answer lies in my brain tissue. At least not most of the answer.”

  “Meaning?”

  “Meaning that there are four areas I have localized as promising but haven’t had any breakthroughs. There is the conscious mind, the unconscious mind, the superconscious/collective conscious mind and DNA. They all exist simultaneously in all modern humans, I’m certain but not like they do in me.”

&nbs
p; “My goodness. Cryptids abound in our little neighborhood, don’t they?”

  “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  “What are you, then? A new species of homo sapiens? Homo sapiens adamstjamesis?”

  “You mock but yes, it’s possible. In fact, it’s very possible.”

  “You’re serious, aren’t you?”

  “I don’t really have that much of a sense of humor, Misti. Especially about me. You may have noticed that by now.”

  “You’re a boring dullard. But kinda cute. So, tell me more. You have my full attention, Superman.”

  “The conscious and unconscious are well known, but not well understood. Are these two connected, if so how and what relationship do they have to the brain, brain function and brain chemistry? Are mind and brain the same thing or do they exist separately and independently?”

  “Same thing I’d say. Only way to verify your analysis, or anyone else’s for that matter, is by the scientific method. If there is no experimental proof, then it’s just a hypothesis. Besides getting into the whole mind-body thing smacks of spirituality and God. Not very scientific.”

  “Maybe. But is that the only way we can experience knowledge? Can something simply be, exist, that we don’t understand. Maybe cannot ever understand because it isn’t scientifically provable?”

  “God, again?”

  “No. Something way less religious and far more practical.”

  “Doesn’t normally work that way, does it?”

  “Maybe not now, but it used to. We know how certain phenomena work in the physical world because of science. But we used all sorts of tools and processes that functioned even before we knew the ‘how’ they worked. We might not have understood the chemistry or biology of wine. But we knew that if you drank enough of it, you’d get drunk. Now we understand the chemical composition of alcohol and how it interacts with the body and the brain. We didn’t before.”

  “Gotcha.”

  “But the mental aspect is still a quandary. And the phenomenon of terminal lucidity proves to me beyond any reasonable doubt that a serious argument can be advanced that the mind and the brain each exist independently of the other. Related somehow, I’m sure. But the two are not the same, not completely co-extensive.”

 

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