by Tiana Laveen
“Well, it didn’t happen often, and she hasn’t slept with me in three years. Closer to four. She felt guilty.”
“Well, I’m glad one of you did. You two were toxic as fuck.” Viper huffed. “I love you, you know that, but you’re crazy. I’m not giving you anything unless you promise me that you’ll leave her alone.”
“You can’t tell me to leave your mother alone! Who do you think you—”
“Don’t do this shit, try to turn it around, make it some power struggle between father and son. I’m not the moral police, but you’re wrong.” Dad sucked his teeth, crossed his arms, and looked away. “You’re playing with fire, toying with each other’s emotions. The only reason why Mamá hasn’t told your wife is because then Ricky would know, too. If he dies, what do you think she’s going to do? Sing like a bird because she wants to hurt you. You both like hurting each other, and it’s messed up. Diego and I grew up surrounded by a bunch of bullshit because you two couldn’t get your stuff together. Now you have the boldness to sit here, on my couch, in my home, and try to tell me to stay out of this shit? Ha! Man, father or not, straight up, this is some bullshit and you know it. Don’t tell me not to tell you to leave her alone. I have the right.”
“It’s none of your business.”
“You made it my business! You think I wanna hear about this backwards shit? I don’t! You dragged me into this because you’re sitting there, and I’m sitting here. I’m not the one askin’ for money so I can screw my ex-wife while I’m still married and living with another woman, now am I?”
“All right, all right!” Dad raised his hand in surrender. “I won’t do it. I won’t ask her for sex. I’m being selfish, I guess. I dunno, but she was mine first, you know? I feel like she will always be mine… But yes, I know you’re right. I love Veronica, too. Just differently, Dominic. It’s possible to love two women, you know.” He grimaced at his father. The man talked more bullshit sometimes than anyone else he knew. “Your mother and I had something incredible, but we wanted to kill each other every other day. I never stopped loving her. It was difficult. It is still difficult, after all these years. Then, when we…” His Adam’s apple bobbed up and down as he got emotional. “When we lost our son, your brother, Diego, we got close again. I don’t understand how I can hate and love someone so much, all at the same time.”
Viper excused himself and grabbed his phone from the kitchen.
“I was going to write you a check, but they all say, ‘Dr. Dogology.’ I want to keep all business expenses separate.”
“Ayyye! That’s the name of your dog training services now?”
“Yeah. Majesty helped me come up with it. I said I wanted something catchier than ‘Dog Training Academy.’”
“That’s great, Viper. Funny, too!”
“I’m going to send the money to your CashApp. Then, you send it to Mamá, okay?”
“Yes, yes.”
Viper typed the information in, then hit ‘Send.’
They talked for a while longer, then he walked the man to the door.
“Like I said, I will pay you back.”
“You’re my father. I don’t want your money. Mamá needs her cash, so just make sure she gets it.”
His father nodded, then leaned in and kissed his cheek.
“Dad, I do have a question for you though, since you’re here.”
“Yes, what is it?”
“Remember that crazy friend of yours who lives in Orlando? The one you met in jail that one time?”
“Maceo… Yes. We still talk from time to time. In fact, I saw him last year. What about him?”
“I had a little problem out that way not too long ago. And based on what you told me about him, I think he might be the man for the job.”
“What kind of problem?”
“Harassment. It traumatized my girlfriend’s son. I don’t like that.”
“I don’t like that, either.”
“I tried to play it their way, deal with it in court, but of course, my side wasn’t considered, and I was forced to pay the ticket. The money didn’t mean shit to me. It’s the principle. You don’t get to make a little boy and the woman I love cry, and not pay for that. Walk away like you didn’t do shit.” His eyes narrowed. The darkness swelled within him, and his forked tongue longed to take a swipe at a motherfucker. The fangs were coming out, and he wanted nothing more than to taste fresh blood. “You think Maceo could help me out?” He smirked.
“Viper, what are you cooking up?” His father gave him a suspicious look, mixed with a hint of mischief.
“I’m cooking some red and blue soup, papà, but I have to let it sit and cool. Revenge, as they say, is a dish best served cold. But don’t worry, I’ll add some heat. I wouldn’t be a true Latin King if I didn’t bring some of that caliente fire…”
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
Twinkle in Your Father’s Eye
“Grandpa, my report card came out last week. I got a B in my English, and the rest were all A’s!” Troy exclaimed, his eyes big and smile as wide as the sun that shone down on them in the park. He jumped up and down in front of the man. “Can I have some money? Five dollars for each A, and four dollars for the B. Deal?” Daddy laughed and picked him up, then swung him around. The fake doting father… What a crock of crap.
“That sounds like a deal to me, Troy!”
It doesn’t matter what comes out of his mouth. It’s a lie.
Majesty moved leisurely back and forth on the swing, her lips pursed and her heart beating hard with anxiety. Daddy had called her out of the blue, and she’d accidentally answered his call while browsing her social media. Damn iPhone… He’d said he was about twenty minutes away and wanted to stop by, and she’d had no excuse to offer to avoid that visit. After being caught off guard, she’d settled into the realization that all the running she’d been doing from the man needed to come to an end, anyway. So, she’d agreed to meet him at the park since she’d been on her way out the door.
The man had to be up to something. Daddy was always up to something. The very sight of him bothered her because she resembled him so much. No matter how much she wished it weren’t true, they had the same eyes and hair. Daddy looked like Billy Dee Williams with his smooth, wrinkle-free chocolate skin, wavy salt and pepper hair, and a suaveness fit for a charismatic king. Yet, he acted more like the sneaky, diabolic lizard creature, Randall Boggs, from the Monster’s Inc. movie.
“Troy, go on over there on that slide and let me see how you go down it!”
“Okay, Grandpa. Watch dis!” Troy ran in the direction of the slide.
Daddy waved to Troy like he was watching some parade, then inched close to Majesty. Here comes the Greatest Bullshit Show on Earth! Step right up, ladies ’nd gents! Be prepared to be amazed at all the lies one mothafucka can tell in a single bound! It’s a bird… It’s a train… It’s Suuuuuper Liar!
She held onto the chains and kept on swinging, pretending every now and again that he wasn’t even there. All he did was stare at her with puppy dog eyes.
“Daddy, what do you want?”
He had the nerve to look shocked, even throwing up his arms in consternation.
“Majesty, what in the world would make you think that I want something? Can’t a father come see his daughter and only grandson? It’s not like I haven’t been trying to already.” He chuckled, looking about as if he had an invisible audience to back him up. A car drove slowly past. The sounds of an old classic, ‘Brandy’ by Looking Glass, drifted from the red Honda.
“You either want something, come to dig for information, or are gearing up to ask for something later down the line. This is how you make little deposits so when you drop the bomb, it doesn’t seem so out of left field.”
Her father’s smile faded. She stopped swinging and got to her feet.
“I missed you, Majesty. I haven’t seen you in forever. Thank God for Facetime, and Allison sending me photos. And she’s not even my daughter; she just feels sorry for me, or
I wouldn’t even know what Troy looked like! I wanted to see my grandson. It’s not fair how you’ve been doing me. There are no ulterior motives. Now, you can believe whatever you want.”
“Thank you, I will… Troy, be careful!” she called out as he abandoned the slide and worked his magic on the monkey bars, showing off, acting like some gymnast for all to see. Last time he’d done a flip, he’d ended up with a bump on his head that didn’t heal for several days. His friend had drawn a smiley face on it, and they’d named it ‘Freddy.’
“I know I wasn’t the best father. I’ve admitted that before, Majesty. What do you expect me to do? I’ve been trying. He began to count off his fingers. “I call you all the time… you don’t return my calls. I’ve written you messages on your social media. I get no response or the comment is deleted, and now, you’ve blocked me. I text you, same thing. You didn’t block me on your phone because you know I call to speak to Troy, or I’m sure that line of communication would be cut off, too. What can I do to make this right? I can’t go back in time, Majesty, but I can move forward.”
She looked down at the dirt and pebbles, the tired grass, and the sneaker imprints along the ground. When she looked back up, Daddy was still standing before her, tears in his eyes. He placed his hand on her shoulder.
“I don’t want nothing from you, baby. But I do want to tell you what a great mother you are, and how proud I am of you. I heard you were almost finished with college, that you work a million jobs to make ends meet, and you bought a nice house for yourself and my grandson. Your mother and I made a lot of mistakes, but you weren’t one of them. I’d do it all over again if I was guaranteed that I could make you again.”
She blinked a couple of times, then searched for Troy on the playground. She soon spotted him on a seesaw, jerking it up and down and laughing, pretending there was someone on the other side with him. She couldn’t help but smile.
What a silly child. My sweet, beautiful, silly child.
Troy had her father’s smile. Damn him.
“Daddy, I’ve been standing here listenin’ to your sales pitch: Your generic tryna-pull-my-emotional-strings-by-rustlin’-up-some-tears speech with the shaky voice ’nd all.” The man huffed and rolled his eyes. “And I’ve decided, for Troy’s sake, I’m going to try to deal with you. But I can’t make any promises.” Daddy nodded and sighed. “You’re like one of those commercials that goes, ‘I won a structured settlement, it’s my money, and I need cash now!’ You ain’t J.G. Wentworth. You think just because now you feel like being a father, that you can be one. I’m grown now. It doesn’t work that way.”
“I know what this is about, and I know why you’re angry, Majesty. I shouldn’t have taken my issues I had with your mother out on you. She made things difficult for me when I left, and instead of fighting harder for you, I ran off.”
“Yup, and now you blame her for everything, too, when some of it wasn’t even her fault. On top of that, you made a whole ’nother family… Troy! Please don’t climb up the slide backwards!”
They were quiet for a spell. Daddy put his hands on his hips.
“Well… Majesty, you look good, honey.”
“Thank you.” He did as well, but she refused to compliment him.
“How have you been?”
“I’ve been fine. Just fine.” She kicked a pebble around. The awkward silence went from a few seconds to what felt like an eternity. “Troy loves you a lot. That’s why we’re here at the park. I answered the phone by accident. Guess it was your lucky day.”
Daddy stood a bit straighter, smiling big at Troy yet visibly choked up. He had religiously sent Troy presents over the past three years. To his credit, he’d been consistent. He’d started out of the blue, just like this strange visit. He’d call Troy regularly, in fact. Yet, when he’d ask that Troy pass the phone to her, she’d refuse to engage in conversation. At times, she couldn’t really understand why she was being so stubborn. I guess I wanted him to hurt, just like he hurt me…
“I do want to say one thing. I appreciate you for trying to help with Troy, Daddy. It’s hard raising a child… tryna keep him not only well taken care of, but safe and happy. I couldn’t imagine missing out on his life. I couldn’t imagine having a child, and then forgetting they even exist.” She swiped her knuckle along her eye, the tears stinging now.
“I’ve been trying to make things right. You told me a long time ago you didn’t want anything to do with me after that blow up we had years ago, so I waited for a while. I shouldn’t have done that. I should’ve just called you and apologized. I had much on my mind at the time, including a lot of guilt, and I took it out on you.”
In the heat of an argument several years ago, Daddy had told her to stop bringing up old shit, that she was just like her mama, living in the past, and that she’d made mistakes too, such as getting pregnant by a thug who’d ended up dead. Then, to drive the knife in deeper, he’d added that her child was a bastard like so many other Black children in the world. So basically, she’d become another statistic. His words had hurt her to her core—reached in all the way and tore her heart out.
“I tried to treat Troy well, make you see that I was for real about making amends, but you’re obstinate. You didn’t budge.”
“I don’t have to jump when you say jump.”
“I know that but look how long it has been. I decided to just drive over here… ’cause I needed to see you. Majesty, why did you never call me back? Text me back? I understood your resistance initially, but why did it take so long? I just have to know.”
“I didn’t trust you. I had my defenses up. I still don’t trust you. That wasn’t the only time you’d hit below the belt. You didn’t come to my high school graduation, either. All because you were mad at Mama because of the child support thing from years ago. I was the one to punish in your eyes. I didn’t believe you loved me anymore after that. You just weren’t there. I used to call you when I was a teenager, and rarely got a call back. My sister and brother had their fathers who’d come around, but not mine… Not mine.” The breeze caught her hair and whipped it about. She wished it would cover her eyes for she didn’t want him to look into them.
She didn’t want this man to see her at her weakest.
He ran his hand absently over his pants and cleared his throat.
“Fathers, mothers, sisters, brothers… We ain’t perfect, Majesty.”
“No, we’re not. Funny though, I never asked for perfection. I just asked you to acknowledge my existence.”
“All we can do is our best. I didn’t do my best, and life is short. I’m sorry about any pain I caused you, and I know I caused a lot. I have plenty of excuses, some of which I think are legitimate and should be taken into account, but that doesn’t make it any less hurtful to you, and if you’re willing to talk to me now on account of Troy, then hey,” he smiled sadly, “I’ll take it. Come here and give me a hug.”
She hesitated for a moment, then walked to him and closed her eyes as he wrapped his arms around her and squeezed. She hadn’t felt his embrace in so long, it nearly shocked her system. She began to shake and fight tears. She struggled between wanting to hug him tighter and letting go all together. She decided to simply hug him back. Stay present in the moment.
The afternoon wore on. Daddy chased Troy around, huffing and puffing. She tried to keep from laughing as the kid gave him a run for his money. The old man was out of breath.
“Daddy, I have to take Troy home now. We’ll call you this weekend.”
“Do you promise?” Her heart beat a little faster when he looked at her like some poor soul in a need of a snuggle. She didn’t care how he made her feel, and how he was making her hope. Hope that finally, she might have the father she’d once longed for.
“Yes, I promise.” Troy threw himself in his grandfather’s arms, then the man put a twenty-dollar bill in his hand.
“Good job in school, young man. Keep it up!”
“Twenty dollars! I’m going to use this
to buy a dog, Grandpa!”
“A dog? I think it might cost more than that to get a dog, Troy.” He laughed. “But you could put it towards one, I suppose, as long as your mama says it’s all right.”
“Nuh uh. I got a connection, Grandpa. A hookup. Mama’s boyfriend, Viper; he can get me a dog.”
“Mama’s boyfriend, huh? What does this man do for work?” Daddy crossed his arms over his chest, his expression sharp and attentive.
“He trains dogs. Bad dogs. He trains ’em at his house, and Mama said he teaches classes on dog training, too, and now he bought a building to train ’em at. But he gotta train and hire um, what’s it called, Mama? Taffy?”
“Staff, Troy.” She huffed, aggravated that once again, her child was spilling all of her tea to the lowest bidder.
“Yeah, staff. He got a bunch of dogs, Grandpa, and he plays his music real loud. It shakes the whole street… like an earthquake. Sometimes the police come, but when they leave, he got it turned back up again. Mama used to be mad at him. She hated him. Now they call each other ‘baby’.” Oh, Lord. Majesty could feel her face flushing with heat as Troy told all her damn business! “…And he helps me with my math homework sometimes, too. He’s good with numbers. And then the cop slammed him against the car. He had a bruise on his arm when we went to Disney World, but it was hard to tell ’cause of all of his tattoos…
“He got a tattoo of a big ol’ scary skull and a naked lady, and a crown like the one on a king. And a lion… He slapped Mama on the booty in the kitchen one time when he didn’t think I was awake… His friends talk Spanish, too, and I found out that culo means ass in Spanish, Grandpa… He was doin’ wheelies down the street on his motorcycle… His friend came over one day when I was playin’ with his dogs, and the guy had a black eye. Said he got into a fight with some La Raza members… Viper is cool, Grandpa!”
And on and on it went. Daddy thankfully let Troy rattle on without asking her for more details, though it was obvious by his facial expression he was a bit concerned by what the boy was telling him. Daddy walked them to their car. She got in and made sure her son put his seatbelt on. How eager she was to head home, run a bath, and relax.
