At least there’s something I can do. Despite getting headaches, I’ve started medicating myself again, to be prepared. But even with that, how does this work? Do I ask Hell to take one of those pills? What if he takes one and I’m not in the mood? Do we have to arrange a time and place? Coordinate our schedules? Whatever happened to spontaneity? Seems we need to have another discussion; I just suspect neither of us knows how to approach it. One thing for certain, for us to have the heart-to-heart talk we need, he has to be with me, not at the club.
Jay’s quiet on the short journey. Another thing I lay at Hell’s door. He’s not been around enough for her to get comfortable with him. When we arrive and park, she hangs back, her eyes wide as she takes in the compound. I’ve been to Tucson before, and this is an old converted industrial building, miles removed from the only other clubhouse she knows. I see the brick building through her eyes. It’s bound to look a little foreboding. A far cry from the ex-vacation resort in Arizona. She’d been spoiled there. Though, I suspect, once she gets inside, it won’t be all that different.
Paladin’s clearly been waiting for her. He comes out of the clubhouse as soon as we’re parked, his enthusiastic welcome slightly ruined by the fact a scantily clad Tulia, the youngest club girl, is tearing after him.
“Pal! Wait up. Aren’t you coming to the barbeque? Thought you and I could…”
Pal turns and glares at her. His long strides, her short but more speedy ones, mean they’re both near the car when Jayden steps out. “Tulia,” he says sharply. “Get back inside.”
“But Pal…”
“Pal?” Jayden’s stepped out. Her eyes wide, her nostrils flaring as though sensing a rival. “Who’s this?”
“No one,” he replies sharply. “Just a club whore who doesn’t know what’s good for her.”
The two girls stand, their eyes shooting daggers at each other. I wait, interested to see how this plays out. Jayden’s going to have to find some backbone if the club girls see her as competition, especially if it’s a man they’ve already had.
Paladin steps between them, his back toward Tulia. “Get back inside. I’ve already told you I’m not interested,” he tosses his instruction over his shoulder. “Jay, it’s so good to see you.” He holds out his hand. I inwardly give an exasperated sigh as Jayden reaches out to take it. She trusts him. I wish she wouldn’t.
“Scat,” Hellfire steps to my side, slipping the keys to the SUV into his pocket, and scowling at the club girl.
“Whores are going to be at the barbeque?” I question him. They never were allowed in the past, not when the kids were around. But then, my children haven’t been kids for a long time.
“Under sufferance,” Hell replies. “Brothers asked for them.”
“They can’t keep their hands to themselves for one afternoon?”
“They’ve been told to behave.” He nods pointedly at Jayden who’s walking hand in hand with Paladin, the latter talking animatedly. I wonder whether he’s explaining Tulia’s presence, and, whether Jayden believes him.
The sun is shining. It’s a pleasant spring day. I follow my own man around to the back where the grills, set up in the remains of the old furnace, are already emitting aromas which, despite my reluctance to be here, are making my mouth water. Eyeing the picnic tables, the preponderance of males, the smattering of scantily clad females, I uneasily wonder what the afternoon will bring.
Two people I don’t see are Jayden and Paladin. I frown. Damn it. Where have they gone? I should have warned her to stick by my side. Only been here a minute, and I’ve already failed as a chaperone.
Chapter 23
Paladin
Fuck these club girls. There are five of them, and each one seems to have trouble understanding when I say no, I mean it. They look on me as someone new, someone they haven’t yet taken for a test ride. My only qualifications are that I’m a biker, and unfamiliar, a challenge. I’ve had to fend each of them off.
I’d been looking forward to Jayden arriving, giving her a tour of where I’m living now, and showing her off to my brothers. She looks fucking gorgeous today, figure-hugging jeans, knee-high boots, and a leather jacket Ella had bought her in recognition of the lower temperatures here. Her long blond hair brushed until it shines, flowing around her shoulders. I’m proud to walk in with her, but hope it won’t be long before I get that scowl off her face.
I was going to take her straight outside, but decide to detour. “Want to come see my room?”
“Oookay,” she agrees, the strung-out word betraying her hesitation.
Damn it. I don’t want her scared of me. Just wanted somewhere where we could talk uninterrupted. I’m also too embarrassed to say anything in case I’m misreading her reluctance. If she thinks I’m going to take advantage, she’s on the wrong track. Tugging a little on her hand, I don’t give her time to take in the bar area, before leading her to the stairs and then up and along the hall until we reach my room. Oh, shit. I left it unlocked and now the door’s ajar.
As it opens fully, Jay bursts out laughing when she spies a very large feline taking up the middle of my bed. First time I’ve actually been pleased to see Bitch. Her presence has broken the tension.
Quick as a flash, I tell her, “And that, is the only female that’s been in here.”
Her eyes shoot to mine. I’m telling her the complete truth, and can only hope she believes it. “Keep forgetting to lock the darn door. Cat must know who’s got a mind like a sieve. Hey, be careful…”
She’s crossing to the bed, her hand outstretched. Holding my breath, I wait for that paw to strike out, but damn Bitch is actually purring as she starts getting stroked. Jay’s attention on the cat, she asks over her shoulder, “What was that, outside?”
“Fuckin’ club girl not taking no for an answer.” I scowl. “Honestly Jay, sometimes I don’t think we talk the same language.”
Jay giggles.
“It’s not funny.”
“It is. And it’s a compliment, isn’t it? They want you?”
Gingerly, trying not to disturb Bitch and keeping away from her claws, I sit on the bed. “They want to try a new cock. They’re having a competition to see which of them can get me first.” Mace had explained to me. The brothers think it’s a joke and have been placing bets as to how long I’ll hold out. “But no one will, I promise you, Jay.”
When her eyes meet mine, I can see a maturity there as she asks in a serious tone, “How long can you keep refusing, Pal?”
“With you waiting? Forever.”
Stroking the cat, her hands having something to do, seem to make the conversation easier. It suddenly hits me we’re alone. In a bedroom. For the first time ever. “What if,” for a second I wonder if she’s speaking to Bitch, as that’s where she’s now looking. “What if I can never give you what you want?”
“I won’t be going with a bitch, Jay. Just want what’s best for you.” I love her. Have done for quite a while now. The feeling having gradually grown, morphing from being that of a friend or a brother into something else. As she’s matured, so has the way I feel about her. But I can’t tell her. Don’t want to scare her off.
I watch, intrigued, as Bitch gets up and stretches, then rubs herself against Jay’s arm. Even the darn cat is entranced by her. I hold my breath when Jay scoops her up in her arms and cuddles her. Don’t let her claws come out now.
Then Jay’s standing, carrying her to the door, placing her outside. “Sorry, Puss. I’m not sharing my man.” She closes the door, but not before eyeing the scratches under the door handle. A slight grin comes over her face as she realises how the crafty feline gets in.
“Better lock it. She’ll only be back.”
“I can see that. Clever cat.” She locks it. Another first. Her and I behind a locked door.
We both laugh as we can hear Bitch throwing herself at other rooms along the hallway. Then Jayden’s face grows serious, as she glances at the barrier between us and the outside world, then at me. She’s
biting her lip, making me want to soothe it with my tongue. My cock thickens in my jeans. It has to be because we’re behind a locked door, hundreds of miles away from Drummer, Slick, Ella and all the men and women who’d watch us like hawks back in Tucson. For the first time, I’m allowing myself to have a very masculine reaction around her. There’s no doubt of my feelings toward her at all.
Now the cat is no longer between us, I allow myself to move closer, pushing for something I never have before. “Can I kiss you, Jay?”
She rears back, looking startled. I hope it’s because my request came out of the blue, not because she finds it distasteful. Again, her teeth worry her lip.
“Never mind,” I say softly. “We’ll just go join the others. Food should be ready soon.”
“Pal,” she puts out her hand and touches my arm. “I’ve, I’m…”
“It’s not the right time.” I get it, I do. I’ll just live with my disappointment.
“I’m not sure whether it is or not. Sounds crazy, doesn’t it? I know you expect things to change between us, now that we’re here.” She glances around. “Alone.” A quick grin. “I can’t help but expect Slick to jump out of the closet.”
“With a shotgun,” I laugh. Understanding exactly what she’s thinking. We’ve both been conditioned not to respond to each other.
She inches closer to me. “Pal? I, I think I would like to kiss you.”
I inhale sharply. A moment I’ve anticipated for so long. I’ve kissed her forehead before, even her cheek, but until that peck on the side of my face the other day, which barely counts, she’s never taken the initiative. I’m nervous, I’ve kissed girls, of course, but no one who means as much to me as Jay does. All of a sudden I regret suggesting it, wanting the dream to go on a little longer rather than risk disillusioning her. What if I’m not what she expects? What if I do something wrong? Knock my teeth against hers? What if it’s awkward? Fuck, I’m scared I’m going to push her away.
Her breathing has sped up. How do I read that? Is she nervous too? Fuck, she has to be. Has she ever kissed anyone before? Did the fuckers who… No, don’t go there, Pal. Don’t even think it. And never ask.
I’m the man. I’m expected to make the first move, aren’t I? My hands are shaking as gently I raise my right, placing it against her left cheek. I lean in, oh so slowly, giving her every chance to move back. She raises her head slightly, her lips aligned with mine though inches still separate us. A gap which narrows too fast, yet at the same time, torturously slow. I can feel her warm breath against my skin, only a fraction of free space remains between our lips.
Bang! A hammering on the door. Both of us jump apart, my heart’s thundering in my chest. Jay’s hand covers her own, as shocked as I.
“Pal? Jay? You in there? Food’s ready!” It’s Demon. He’s trying the door handle.
“Coming!” I yell back, then, when I’ve unlocked the door, I raise my chin defiantly at the VP. “Bitch got in.” I tell him, explaining the bolt.
He grins. Accompanying his words with a wink. “Mo, Mom, sent me. Think she was worried what you’re getting up to.” Jeez. Perhaps it’s not Slick we need to worry about here. Seems we’re still not allowed time to ourselves. He leans in conspiratorially, “I won’t tell her you locked yourselves in. Don’t think she’d believe you about Bitch. Hi Jay.” He nods the last over my shoulder.
Looking around, I see Jay’s face is flushed as though I really had kissed her. That she’s embarrassed is putting it mildly. But I’m proud as fuck when she jumps to my defence. “The cat was just in here…”
“I’m messing with you,” Demon laughs. “Fuckin’ cat gets everywhere. Only tolerate her as she catches the mice.” He stands back, waving his hand. “Come on then.”
Swallowing back the request that he leave us alone to finish what we started, I hold out my hand for Jay to take, then lead her back down the stairs, across the clubroom, and out to where picnic tables are already filled. There’s still a short queue by the grill. Interestingly, it’s set up in what I’ve been told is the remains of the original furnace.
Jay’s grip on my hand tightens. I’m not surprised. It’s the first time my new brothers have seen her. Cad, already eating, catches my eye and gives me a thumbs up. Working closely with him, he’s one of the brothers I know best.
Thunder’s manning the grill, Runt and Wills, two of the prospects helping out. Both, close to my age, eye Jayden up with interest. For some reason, there’s no bar on prospects having a girl here, and something about the way they’re assessing her has me placing my arm around her waist and pulling her into my side.
“Might as well piss on her while you’re at it,” a voice, unmistakable as Lizard’s, says in my ear. “Hey, I’m Lizard. Seems your man’s too rude to introduce me to his lovely lady.”
As Jay gives a nervous laugh, she takes the hand he holds out to her. Instead of shaking it though, he raises it to his lips and kisses the back. Jay blushes, as my body goes rigid. Lizard laughs, using my confusion to step up and get ahead of us in the line. Turning, he winks at me over his shoulder.
Asshole.
We fill our plates, Jayden grabs some salad shit that doesn’t interest me, then I lead her to a table where there’s space, pretending I don’t see Moira beckoning us over. In order to avoid her, I belatedly realise I’ve joined the table where Pyro and Taser are sitting.
Both men’s eyes immediately go to Jay.
“Jay, this is Pyro and that there is Taser.” This time I take the lead.
Taser’s giving her a long assessing look. Too long for my liking. Suddenly he speaks, “So you’re the baby Pal’s been sittin’.”
Pyro slaps him around the back of his head. “Doesn’t look much like a baby to me.”
“What I was thinkin’,” Tase replies, rubbing his skull. “Now I see what Pal’s been makin’ such a fuss over.”
Is it wrong that I want my property patch on her? Or, if not that, a fucking big neon sign flashing over her head, mine.
Jay takes a delicate mouthful of food. It is good shit, Thunder can cook. But I don’t much care for her appreciative groan which goes straight to my dick. I can only hope it doesn’t have the same effect on anyone else, or I might need to kill someone. She swallows, then looks around.
“Anything here to drink, Pal?”
“Sure. Soda?” I start to stand, then waver.
“Go ahead, Brother. We’ll look after your girl.”
Which is what I’m afraid of. Jay in no way looks like jailbait. They know her age, don’t they? Fuck me, but I can’t remember. I hurry away, almost pushing brothers out of my path in my hurry as I go back to the coolers to get our drinks. Bottle and can in hand, I start to return to the table, when Sparky steps in front of me, impeding my progress.
“That’s her, is it? Nice lookin’ kid.”
“Yeah, that’s Jayden.” I confirm.
“You bringing her on the ride the weekend after next?”
“Might. Haven’t asked her yet. She’s not had any experience ridin’. Need to get her on the back of my bike to see how she takes to it.” I think for a moment. “Will there be any other women along?”
Sparky shakes his head. “Prez, Bomber and Buzzard may bring their old ladies. You’re the only other fucker who’d let a bitch up behind him.” He laughs and walks off. I swear he’s muttering no one else would be crazy enough.
I speed up, keep my head down, and end up back at the table without being stopped again. Jay’s laughing at something Pyro has said. At least she doesn’t seem to feel I’ve left her adrift. But then, she’s used to being around bikers.
“Sorry, got caught up.”
She smiles as she takes her soda. “Pyro and I were just getting acquainted. So Pyro manages the auto-shop, and you, Taser, what do you do?”
“I run the strip club.” If he’s said it so bluntly to shock her, it won’t work. She knows all about Angels in Tucson, the strip club Satan’s Devils own there.
Sh
e grins. “Always fancied trying my hand at pole dancing.” I’m not sure how I stop myself spitting out the mouthful of beer I’ve just taken.
“You’re not fuckin’ pole dancing.” I tell her.
Almost about the same time Taser points out, “Got a pole inside if you want to give it a try? I’m sure Titsy could give you some pointers.”
I growl, they laugh. Jay looks like she’s giving it careful consideration. Then she glances at me and smiles, managing to convey she was pulling my leg. A wave of relief goes through me. Her looking the way she is? Don’t want to see my brothers watching her slide up and down a fucking pole.
Chapter 24
Jayden
I’m having fun. I don’t know what I expected coming to a different club. I knew it wasn’t going to be like the Tucson chapter, that a family barbeque was a misnomer as there wasn’t much family here. But the men I’ve met so far have been alright. The problem I’m going to have is learning all their names.
It had been strange upstairs in Paladin’s bedroom. The first time I’d been alone with him. The first time he was going to kiss me. As I eat the food on my plate, I wonder what it would have been like if we hadn’t been interrupted. Would it have made the tingles that Moira had described go through me? The anticipation had almost been enough. Talk about bad timing, we’d been that close before Demon had knocked on the door.
Part of me wishes he hadn’t stopped us. The other part is glad, in some ways, that he had. It’s not that I don’t trust Paladin, I don’t trust myself. I don’t know the boundaries, when to stop, when to encourage him. I’m scared of him taking advantage and going too far like those men had in my past, but likewise, I haven’t any experience of successfully saying no. Would I have known when to stop? Or would he?
In two months, I’m legal. Many kids my age have already lost their virginity, obviously, mine went years ago, but I left school friends in Tucson who were sexually active and not ashamed of it. What does a date on the calendar matter? Particularly when different states, different countries, have different interpretations. Do I feel old enough? I feel ancient in many ways, a nervous kid in others.
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