‘No,’ Alexa said numbly. ‘You don’t.’
‘So it’s settled, then! I’ll see you tomorrow.’
‘I... Yes, you will.’ She cleared her throat. ‘Could you please put Benjamin back on the phone?’
‘Of course.’
There was another pause, then a, ‘Yeah.’
‘I have an hour for lunch today and clearly we need to talk. Can you meet me at St George’s Mall at one?’
‘Yes.’
‘It wasn’t a real question, but I’m glad you agreed. It makes things easier.’
Chapter 5
‘What were you THINKING?’
It was the first thing Alexa said when she saw him. A bit rude, in his opinion, but he allowed it because she’d made a good impression on his mother. Nina had murmured her approval and patted his cheek in affection. All this came after she’d read him the Riot Act for keeping his relationship a secret.
‘Hello, Alexa,’ he said calmly. ‘Would you like to have a seat at one of the coffee shops? It is lunch, after all. And I haven’t had breakfast. A busy morning,’ he added, taking her elbow lightly and steering her through the crowds of people milling about. ‘What with speaking to your brother about our fake relationship, having my mother find out about it, and then, of course, my actual business, which is open, but why would they need the manager and acting head chef there for the lunchtime rush?’
‘I have responsibilities, too.’
‘And yet here we are, gallivanting in the middle of the day.’
‘It’s not gallivanting.’
But she said it under her breath. He took it as agreement. How could he not?
St George’s Mall had once been a busy street in Cape Town, but it had been reimagined for pedestrians. Now people walked through the bricked area lined with green trees and yellow umbrellas without the bother of traffic. There were three men playing drums a little way away from them, a boy who couldn’t be older than nine dancing to the beat. Tourists browsed through the stands selling jewellery and African-inspired crafts. Residents walked with purpose to get to where they needed to be, or stopped at one of the cafes to grab something to eat. Police presence was heavy, but quaint, since they monitored the area on horses.
It was one of his favourite places, just fifteen minutes away from his restaurant. It screamed with the vibrancy of Cape Town, which was one reason he loved his city. He wasn’t sure why Alexa had suggested it, since it was further away for her than for him. Could she have been considering him? Or was she merely trying to minimise the chances of someone she knew seeing them together?
He would have related to that, except his mother already knew, so his father would, too, and they were the main people he cared about. It was too late for keeping secrets for him.
‘Hey,’ she said, snapping her fingers. ‘Can we sit here? Or should I ask another time?’
‘Sorry,’ he muttered, and gestured for her to sit.
They took a few minutes to look at the menu. At least, he did. She’d glanced at hers quickly, then set it down and was now watching him.
‘You must be thinking it’s a pity you don’t have X-ray vision with how you’re staring at me.’
‘Hadn’t considered it before, actually. Just like I hadn’t considered having to talk to your mother and be manoeuvred—quite expertly, I might add—into having dinner with your family.’ She slapped her hand against her leg under the table. ‘I’m not even your girlfriend.’
He exhaled, hoping the nervous energy in his body would escape from his lungs. No such luck. It stayed in his chest, bouncing around as though it were being chased by a happy puppy.
‘Let’s get something to drink.’
‘Why would you let your mother think we’re in a relationship?’ she asked, ignoring him. ‘This turns something that could easily be solved into something so much more—’
‘Alexa,’ he interrupted, his voice slicing through her panic. ‘Let’s get something to drink. We can talk about it afterwards.’
Her jaw locked, but she nodded. The waiter came over. He ordered sparkling water—he needed a break from the coffee. It was probably the cause of the nervous energy. Probably—and Alexa got rooibos tea. When the waiter left, Alexa stared wordlessly at him. To emphasise her displeasure, she folded her arms and leaned back.
He took a deep breath.
‘My mother being under the impression we’re together wasn’t my fault,’ he said slowly. ‘Lee ambushed me this morning—’ that was more aggressive than what Lee had done; or maybe not ‘—and when he was talking about the relationship, my mother walked in. I’d forgotten some papers at home and she thought I might need them.’
He could hardly be upset with her for being sweet.
‘Anyway, she found out, and since I’ve never told her about any of my relationships, she kind of latched on to the information. I couldn’t tell her it was a lie without...’ He grasped on to the first thing he could think of. ‘Without your brother overhearing it.’
‘Couldn’t you have told her when he left?’
‘No.’ Anger made the word choppy. ‘She was excited. I couldn’t disappoint her.’
‘People survive disappointing their parents.’
The words were so unexpected, so cool, his anger fizzled.
‘Is that what happened to you?’
‘It doesn’t matter.’ Her features softened, but the lines around her mouth were still tense. ‘What’s going to happen when she finds out we’re not really together, Benjamin? You don’t think she’s going to be disappointed then? You don’t think she’s going to hate knowing that you lied to her? That you don’t have a girlfriend?’ She blushed. ‘I mean, I’m assuming. I don’t care about your romantic—’
‘Of course I don’t have a girlfriend,’ he said, affronted. ‘Do you think I’d be pretending to be your boyfriend if I did? Do you think so poorly of me?’
She stilled, though her eyes, big and bright, remained steady. ‘You want me to say no, but experience has taught me I can’t say that without reservation.’
He had no reply to that. What could he say? But it left a bitter taste in his mouth that she thought that of him. He didn’t deserve it. The only thing he’d done that was morally ambiguous was offer her chef a job at In the Rough. Even then he’d done things above board. Victor Fourie had accepted Benjamin’s offer without a comment about what he’d left behind. In the same way he’d left In the Rough behind when he’d moved on a couple of months ago.
Then again, he could see why she’d have that opinion of him. He worked with her brother, a man she had no relationship with. A man who treated her poorly, and apparently went out of his way to do so. Lee had used Benjamin to that end, too, and he’d unwittingly become a tool to hurt Alexa with. Frankly, he was still working out how he felt about it. Especially since he’d considered Lee a friend until all this had happened.
His fake relationship had thrown everything into upheaval. Including his relationship with his mother. He wasn’t proud of it, but he couldn’t bear to break his mother’s heart. Up until today, he hadn’t even known his mother wanted him to be in a relationship. But the happiness in her voice as she questioned him about his girlfriend—his first, according to her—told him otherwise.
He couldn’t tell her it was all fake. He loved her too much. And yeah, maybe he’d get over disappointing her. But in that moment, it hadn’t even occurred to him.
The waiter interrupted his thoughts, and when the man walked away, he sighed.
‘I’m sorry. About my mother. I wasn’t thinking. Or I wasn’t thinking properly.’
She held the mug in her hands as if to warm herself, though it was a typical summer’s day.
‘I’ve been there,’ she murmured. Then she set the mug down and took her head in her hands instead. ‘I was there—yesterday. Because of my stupid brother, I caused
this mess and—’
She hiccupped. An actual hiccup that was most likely the precursor to a sob. His hand shot out of its own volition, grasping her arm and squeezing in comfort. A hand left her head and rested on his hand.
And just like that, he knew he was in trouble.
Of course, he’d known that before. The entire thing with Alexa was, as she said, a mess. But before, he’d still had some control over his actions. He wasn’t helping her because she needed help. Well, not only because she needed help. He also wanted to help her with his own free will. The moment she showed him vulnerability, though, that free will had waved goodbye and jumped on the nearest plane to anywhere but his mind. Because now he wanted to help her because she really needed help. She was distraught, and things needed to be fixed, and he was the ultimate help when things needed to be fixed.
He’d done it with his mother and father for most of his life, more so as an adult. He’d done it with his last girlfriend. His cousins. Friends. And he would do it now, with Alexa.
He curled his free hand into a fist.
* * *
She was crying. In public. In front of him. Because she was pregnant and because she had to tell him the truth. It was terrifying.
She pulled away from his touch, comforting—disturbingly so—as it was, and reached into her bag for a tissue. She found one, mopped herself up, and sternly told her hormones she wouldn’t stand for tears again. When she was certain they’d got the picture, she downed the rest of her tea, lukewarm now, because of the tears, and looked at him.
His expression was inscrutable. She didn’t know if that made her feel better or worse. But she couldn’t rely on him to make herself feel better. So she took a deep breath, held it for a few seconds, then let it out. It was shaky at best; hitched at worse. She did it again, and again, until it came smoothly. Then she said, ‘I’m pregnant.’
He stared at her.
She cleared her throat. ‘So, you see, you have to tell your mother the truth or she’ll think the baby’s yours and things will get more complicated.’
He still stared at her.
‘I wouldn’t have told you if I didn’t have to. I went over it in my head a million times last night, and again, after that phone call with your mother.’
He didn’t say a word. She pursed her lips when they started to shake.
No, she told the tears that were threatening. I had you under control. You can’t disobey me.
‘I didn’t want you to know,’ she said, thinking that speaking would distract her. ‘I didn’t want anyone to know until I had no choice but to tell them. No one knows besides you. Because somehow, my decision is now going to reflect on you.’
He kept staring, but his mouth had opened. She had to wait a while longer before he said anything.
‘You’re pregnant?’
She nodded.
‘We have to tell people the truth.’
She clenched her teeth when the statement brought a fresh wave of heat to her eyes. She would not cry in front of him. Not again.
‘Okay.’ Her voice broke as she said it. Damn it.
‘They’ll think the baby’s mine, Alexa,’ Benjamin said, his voice pleading. ‘My mother and your brother and everyone else. We can’t just break up then.’
‘Why not?’ she asked desperately. ‘Who cares what they think?’
‘I do.’ His face was stern. ‘It’ll be my reputation on the line.’
‘It doesn’t have to be,’ she said, desperation once again taking the wheel. ‘You can tell them I cheated on you.’
‘What?’
‘Make me the bad guy.’ She hated the thought of it, but it was her only option.
‘You’d rather have everyone think you cheated than tell the truth?’
‘I don’t care what everyone thinks,’ she said heatedly. ‘If Lee finds out I made this up because of him...’ She met his gaze. ‘He took my property and my restaurant years ago and he had no reason to. If I give him this, it’ll fuel him for years.’
‘What do you mean, your property? Your restaurant?’
She scoffed. ‘Please don’t pretend you don’t know what Lee did. It’s an insult to you and me both.’
‘I have no idea what you’re talking about.’
He seemed genuinely confused. Though that could have as easily come from the news that she was pregnant as from this. She sighed.
‘I found the building for In the Rough. Came up with the name, too, because of the neighbourhood. I was determined to turn that place—my place—into a diamond.’ The memory of it curved her lips. ‘I went through hundreds of listings to find it, and I was so excited because it was finally time. I’d spent eight years working towards that moment, and finally...’ She trailed off when a wave of sadness crashed over her. ‘Anyway, I was supposed to take my parents to see it. I mean, I did take my parents to see it. But I made the mistake of telling them where it was when I scheduled the event with them a week before. We always had to make plans in advance with them.’
She shook off the resentment that she’d had to schedule the meeting with her parents in the first place. Second, but not by much, was that they’d told Lee.
‘They told Lee, and he bought it out from under me. He offered to rent it to me. I declined. He would have never allowed me to do what I wanted to do.’ She waved a hand. She wasn’t sure what it was meant to signify. ‘And then I heard you two had become partners. It made sense. If my brother was the devil, I suppose I considered you a demon. My dreams had turned into my own personal hell.’
It was as funny as it was heartbreaking. She was sure the small smile she hadn’t been able to resist conveyed both.
‘I knew none of that.’
‘Would it have changed anything if you had?’ she asked, wanting to know.
A complicated array of emotions danced across his face. She supposed she could understand it. It was a good business decision to be a partner with Lee. He came with property, a smart name, business knowledge, and experience. He also came with baggage: her. She had no idea whether Benjamin cared about that, but what she’d told him now didn’t reflect well on Lee regardless. Unless he shared Lee’s opinion of her, and her brother’s lack of scruples, in which case it wouldn’t change anything.
But he wouldn’t look this tortured if things hadn’t changed for him, would he? Or was she grasping at straws, desperate for someone, anyone, to finally be on her side instead of Lee’s?
‘It’s smart to be in business with Lee,’ came the careful answer. ‘He’s a good businessperson.’
‘You still think so after what I told you?’
The stare flickered. ‘He’s been good to me.’
She licked her bottom lip before drawing it between her teeth. Then she nodded. ‘I suppose that’s fair.’
Disappointing, but fair. But it helped sharpen her idea of him. She’d been faltering on what she thought of him because he hadn’t deliberately set out to hurt her with the restaurant. But after what had happened with her chef, and now, with his opinion of Lee remaining unchanged... It was best if she didn’t think he was someone he wasn’t.
‘If we tell my brother the truth, he’ll use it against you, too,’ she said.
His lips parted, as if he hadn’t considered it. Or maybe he didn’t believe it was possible.
‘It’s too complicated to continue this lie, Alexa.’
She exhaled. ‘Okay.’ It was time to leave. She needed to recover from all this in private. She needed to prepare, too. ‘Give me a few days. It shouldn’t make a difference for you, but it’ll help me figure some things out.’
He gave a slow nod. ‘Then I guess I’ll tell my mother.’
‘Let me.’ She had no idea why she said it, but it was too late to take it back. ‘I’ll come to dinner tomorrow. I’ll tell her I dragged you into this and that you were being
the perfect gentleman. I’ll explain to her what happened with my brother, and how you couldn’t come clean with him near by. We’ll make you come out of this smelling of roses.’
‘Why?’
‘It’s the least I can do after the trouble I caused.’ She took out money and tossed it on the table. ‘Call Infinity with the details about tomorrow.’
She hoped he couldn’t see her shaking as she walked away.
Chapter 6
He offered to pick up Alexa at her flat. Partly because his mother had taught him to be a gentleman, and partly because he felt bad about the way things had gone the day before. He blamed it on his shock. She was pregnant, and he was the only person who knew. It seemed significant. It shouldn’t have. She hadn’t told him because she wanted him to know, but because it made their lie infinitely more complicated. Though he wanted to help her, he couldn’t see how to. And he’d disappointed her because of it. But rather her than his mother.
Nina’s reaction to the news that he was in a relationship had been surprising. After her shock and the millions of questions that had come with it, she told him how happy she was that he was dating.
‘You’re always taking care of us, Benny,’ she’d said. ‘I was worried it stopped you from living your life. But now you have someone!’ She had clasped her hands in glee. ‘I can’t tell you how much I’ve wanted this to happen.’
He could only imagine how she’d react if she thought he was having a baby. He was worried enough about telling her the truth.
He took a shaky breath and rang Alexa’s doorbell. Tried to keep his jaw from dropping when she opened the door almost immediately.
She wore a light pink dress, cinched below her breasts and falling softly over her stomach. He thought it might be a wrap-around dress considering how the material crossed over her body, parting in a slight V at her legs, ending in two different lengths. The V revealed two gorgeous legs, toned, sliding down into heels that matched the exact shade of the dress. There was another V, though he kept himself from looking at that too closely, since it appeared at her chest.
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