It had made quite an impact to come home from work to find empty closets and drawers and spaces where some of their joint possessions had once resided. He’d been one step away from calling the police to report a burglary when he’d found her note. The one ending their relationship and destroying the dream of having a family together.
‘I want the baby’s things,’ she insisted, and walked on into the nursery.
‘You’re kidding.’ Did she really not think how much this would hurt him by taking away that last connection, or did she simply not care? Given her past behaviour, Cal presumed it to be the latter.
The pressure of Izzy’s hand at his lower back reminded him that someone did understand the significance of this to him and cared about it. Now he just wanted Janet to take any reminder of her out of his life for good.
‘There’s no point in wasting all this. It’s not as though you’re going to need it.’ She went around the room, helping herself to the toys and bits and pieces dotted around the room and tossing them into the crib.
He was close to correcting her and informing her he did have a use for it, but he glanced at Izzy, who looked as horrified as he was, and she shook her head, making it known she didn’t want a protest. Though Janet didn’t deserve to walk away victorious, it was clear Izzy wanted Janet out at whatever price it took, instead of prolonging his agony.
The unwanted surprise appearance did prove one thing to Cal. He didn’t, couldn’t love her any more and he hoped that once she’d taken every last trace of their relationship away he’d forget all about her.
‘Is Darren keeping a tight hold of the purse-strings? I don’t blame him.’ Cal had never denied Janet anything so perhaps she was missing being that pampered princess who’d once resided here. The thought of a possible rift didn’t bring him any pleasure when their relationship had come at the price of his. Although he wasn’t beyond making a dig.
‘No,’ she snapped, much too defensively for Cal to believe her. ‘These were bought for the baby so I’m taking them for the baby.’
‘Chosen by me and paid for by me.’ More fool him for doing it and ending up here fighting over ownership of furniture for a baby that wasn’t his.
‘So you don’t want him to have anything?’ Janet cradled her bump and played a lament on his heartstrings. She was having a boy, a child he’d once seen himself playing football with and spending that father/son bonding time together as he’d done with his dad. He’d wanted that baby to have everything but that was when Cal had believed he’d be the one to see him make use of it all.
‘I didn’t say that, Janet.’ If she was here for an argument he wasn’t going to give her one because he no longer had the passion to fight. Not with her, anyway.
‘In that case, you can start dismantling everything and take it down to the car. She can help you.’ Janet’s inclusion of Izzy in her demands was where Cal drew the line.
‘No, she won’t. Where’s Darren? He can help with the heavy lifting.’ It said a lot about the man that he’d let Janet come in here alone. Darren was a coward, along with the other names Cal had assigned to him over the months for not stepping up for the woman he’d got pregnant and allowed to carry on a relationship with someone else.
‘He’s waiting in the van. He didn’t want a scene.’
‘If he wants the furniture he can get his backside in here and help. I’m not doing it on my own and Izzy’s not either.’ He was already on his knees, unscrewing the sides of the cot for easier removal. The purchases he’d made when he’d been so excited for the future now held nothing but resentment for him. He was only sorry he’d promised it to Izzy and had to go back on his word.
Janet glared at Izzy, who was hovering in the doorway, then at the new pots of paint and finally at Cal’s bottom where Izzy had left her mark.
‘Oh. My. Goodness. You two are moving in together?’ She laughed as she finally took in the scene.
‘We are but it’s not what you think.’ Their set-up was none of Janet’s business.
‘That’s priceless, making out as though I’m the bad person here when you two were carrying on behind my back the whole time. I knew there was something going on between you. Perhaps that’s why I was driven to Darren.’
There was no way he was going to let her play the injured party and deflect the responsibility of her actions onto him and Izzy when they’d done nothing wrong.
‘In case you’ve forgotten, you’re the guilty one here. The decision to cheat on me and lie about the baby was entirely down to you. Now, I suggest that, to avoid any more unpleasantness, you go and wait in the van and send Darren in to collect whatever you believe you’re still entitled to. After that I don’t want to see or hear from either of you ever again.’ He was trying to hold the emotion back and as a result he sounded menacingly in control. It was deceptive but hopefully effective because he didn’t want to subject Izzy to any more of this toxicity.
Once Janet was gone they could start with a clean slate in whatever capacity she’d allow him to participate in her life. It had to be an improvement on being the sap Janet had taken him for when they were starting from a place of honesty.
This was the first time he’d had a chance to vent about what Janet had done to him and she simply puffed herself up with indignation and stomped away rather than admit to being in the wrong.
Cal set to work dismantling what was left of the nursery, so Darren could take it away without further discussion. There was nothing left to say except to apologise to Izzy for dragging her into this whole nightmare with him. His desire for a family had brought him nothing but trouble.
* * *
Izzy managed to hold her tongue until the furniture and unwanted guests had left the premises. She’d never been the woman’s greatest fan but the nerve of Janet to come here and lay claim to everything ranked her the lowest of the low.
‘I’m so sorry, Cal. That was just...’ Heartless. Cruel. Cold. All of the above ‘...unbelievable.’ It was heart-wrenching to see him slumped against the half-painted wall, sitting on the floor of the empty nursery. Janet’s actions and manner tonight gave her some insight into how she’d treated him at the end of their relationship and it wasn’t a pretty picture.
There was no justification for treating someone like Cal, who was kindness personified, in that manner. There wasn’t a flicker of doubt in Izzy’s mind that as a fiancé he’d been anything other than as loving and supportive as he was as a friend.
‘You shouldn’t have had to witness that, Iz.’ He hung his head, clearly embarrassed at how things had panned out in front of her, but she was more concerned about how tonight’s events had affected him.
‘No, Janet should never have waltzed in here the way she did. I can’t believe she had the audacity to turn up with Darren and take what didn’t belong to her.’ It was rubbing salt into the deep wound she’d inflicted, as though she never wanted it to heal.
Cal picked up a soft, cuddly sheep that had been left behind. ‘It does look as though I’ve been burgled. At least she left Lamby behind. I’ve had him since I was a kid.’
He gave a sad smile that demanded she immediately hug him, but he couldn’t manage to hug her back.
‘I think he’s had a lucky escape if you ask me. Who wants to live with a horror like that? Lamby will be much happier here with us. White furniture’s too impractical anyway. Give it a week or two and everything she took will be permanently stained with puke and poo. She’ll regret it someday.’
Nothing she could say would ever ease his pain, but she was here if he need her to jolly him along or keep him busy if he started to dwell on things again. It would’ve been so much worse if he’d have been left here in this shell of a nursery alone.
‘I hope you’re right.’ Even so close she could sense him withdrawing from her when they needed one another more than ever.
‘Next time we have a da
y off we could go shopping. I’m past the danger stage, touch wood, and I’d like to get organised. I’d appreciate your help in pointing me in the right direction to get what we need.’ It was her attempt at including him more in this pregnancy, to give him something to look forward to, but she was taking a chance her good intentions might upset him further. The last thing she wanted to do was drag him around baby shops if it was all still too raw for him.
‘I do happen to know of all the best recommendations when it comes to safety and quality.’
‘I don’t doubt it,’ she said with a small laugh. He was so meticulous and thorough in everything he did. Assessing every possible risk was part of his job.
‘She dumped me with a note taped to the fridge, you know. All those years living together, making plans for the future, and I wasn’t worthy of a proper conversation. No apology, no explanation. “I’m leaving you for Darren. The baby’s not yours, it’s his.” I mean, what could I have possibly done to deserve that? I spent weeks, months racking my brain, trying to figure out what I’d done wrong. Did I neglect her, had I become too clingy? Was I too boring or working too much? I’m still none the wiser after tonight.’ His eyes were glistening with unshed tears Izzy wished she could wipe away.
‘If anything good can come out of this it’s that you can see this is none of your fault. Janet wouldn’t have hesitated in casting up your faults if she could’ve blamed you for her behaviour. She has no excuse. The cheating, the lies, using the baby to get what she wanted—it’s all on her. You were unlucky to have ever met her.’ From now on they should concentrate on the future, instead of looking back.
‘It still happened and it’s not something I can easily forgive or forget.’
It was so uncharacteristic of Cal to be so despondent, but she knew from experience you had to hit rock bottom before you could claw your way back up again. Surveying the abandoned nursery, surely, he’d found his.
‘No one would expect you to but please don’t let her continue to ruin your life. Think of this as a new start. Now you’re completely free from Janet and everything associated with her. I appreciate you, even if she doesn’t.’ From tomorrow Izzy was going to do everything in her power to help him move on with her.
Chapter 6
‘Cal, we have enough stuff to open our own shop.’ Izzy glanced around the newly refurbished nursery, imagining their two little ones here.
They’d left it a couple of days after Janet’s surprise visit before venturing out to replace the items she’d purloined. Even then Izzy had waited until Cal brought up the subject, instead of pushing him into a situation that might have made him uncomfortable. He’d been her personal shopper, pointing out the best products to suit her requirements, and she’d chosen the colours and theme for the room.
Unsurprisingly, Cal had insisted on paying for everything, though she’d sworn to pay him back somehow. Retail therapy had helped him cast off the shadow that had fallen over him after a certain someone had briefly come back into his life.
It was important for her to include him in these decisions for the babies so he’d stop hovering on the periphery of this pregnancy and become more involved. He was good at the practical aspects, such as the redecorating, but he’d yet to express his feelings about the situation. He was bound to have doubts and fears for their future just as she had, and it wasn’t going to do any good keeping them bottled up. She didn’t want to find out there were problems too late, the way she had with Gerry. That had been devastating enough but now there were children to think about too.
It wasn’t going to serve anyone well if Cal maintained that emotional detachment when the babies were born. Especially when Izzy knew how much love he had to give. She only had a few months to convince him she wasn’t Janet and it was safe for him to open his heart again.
‘We’ll have to get used to it. Twins are going to come with a lot of baggage and mess.’ His immaculate home was going to be disrupted by two demanding, messy little beings. She didn’t want it to come as a shock after he’d spent every spare minute putting the furniture together to complete this showroom nursery of her dreams.
They’d gone for an underwater theme, the room now festooned with cartoon sea creatures featuring on matching mobiles above the cribs and on the bedding. It was the kind of lovingly put-together room she wished she’d had as a child, instead of the generic spare bedrooms she’d always been designated. When the children were old enough to choose their own décor, she’d make sure their rooms were tailor-made to suit their individual interests and personalities so they never felt like interlopers, the way she had. Their home had to be somewhere they felt safe, wanted and surrounded by people who loved them.
‘You know we’re going to take over this house?’ She eyed the boxes containing the highchairs and baby-walkers they wouldn’t use for a while but which were already taking up space.
‘Trust me, I know exactly what chaos I’ve invited into my home.’ He didn’t sound completely thrilled at the prospect but the smirk ghosting on his lips suggested he’d accepted the consequences.
After Janet’s stunt she wouldn’t have blamed him for changing his mind about sharing his house with anyone again. In the same position she might’ve decided it preferable to live on her own instead of inviting another pregnant woman to stay. To Cal’s credit, he hadn’t waivered in his decision to have her move in. He was reliable in that way and it was part of the reason she’d made a big decision regarding the twins.
‘Cal? I have something to ask you.’
‘Ask away.’ He’d finished installing a night light that played a lullaby and projected moving images of seahorses and jellyfish around the walls. Izzy thought she might start sleeping in here herself if he made it any more appealing.
‘Feel free to say no...you’re under no obligation... but I was wondering if you’d consider being my birthing partner?’ From the second that blue line had appeared on the pregnancy test she’d been determined to do it all on her own because she hadn’t seen any other option. These past weeks Cal had shown her he was there for her day or night.
Although she didn’t want to rely on him too heavily, with the twins on the way it was clear there were going to be more appointments, more risks involved, and these were times when it would be good to have someone holding her hand. It was also her plan to have him there to bond immediately with the babies and fall in love with them the second he saw them.
‘You mean, like, be there at the birth?’ Cal stopped tinkering long enough to come towards her, making her stomach flip. She couldn’t tell if it was her hormones reacting to having him close or the babies letting her know they approved of the idea.
‘Yeah. I thought you might like to be there.’ She didn’t have a partner or family member invested in her pregnancy, and Cal was the only person who had a right to be present in the delivery room with her.
‘If that’s what you want.’ There was no indication that was what he wanted, but she was working on eventually teasing that information out of him.
‘Just so we’re clear, that doesn’t entitle you to boss me about.’ This role didn’t give him carte blanche to interfere, and she’d remain the independent woman she’d always been.
‘Okay, no pregnancy boot camp. I promise not to attempt to take over in any way. Although I hope that doesn’t mean we can’t discuss things like your birth plan or what sort of pain relief you’d prefer. It’s good to look at all available options and work out what’s best for you.’
At least he was thinking ahead on her behalf and it gave her hope that he wasn’t going to leave her in the lurch when she’d need him most. Even if it was only on a practical level so far.
‘You can help me draw up a suitable list of names too. Although I am putting my foot down now and saying no to suggestions of Bill and Ben, Pinky and Perky or any other such monikers.’
‘I’m guessing that rules out This On
e and That One, too,’ he said with a grin, but she knew he’d take the job seriously.
If there was one thing Izzy could guarantee her babies it was that they’d have somewhere to call home, and Cal had played a huge part in making that happen. No matter how reluctantly.
* * *
Cal walked into the office as Izzy was rubbing her hand across her chest with that pained expression on her face again. He set a tall glass of milk and a packet of antacids on the table before her. ‘For the heartburn.’
She’d been getting a lot of that recently and particularly at night if the sounds of her pacing her bedroom were anything to go by.
As a result, she was becoming tired and irritable but as she refused to take time for extra rest, all they could do was wait for the symptoms to gradually ease as the pregnancy progressed.
It was difficult trying to look out for her best interests and avoid becoming a nag. There was a fine line between offering advice and interfering, and he knew he was currently straddling it. Especially since she’d asked him to be more involved as her birthing partner. She would’ve known he’d take that privileged position seriously and it wasn’t something she’d assign to him on a whim. He was surprised when it had taken her so long to share the news about the pregnancy with him.
Cal wasn’t the sort of man, or doctor, who thought pregnant women should necessarily be wrapped up in cotton wool but sometimes there was cause to be concerned. Multiple pregnancy carried a higher risk of complications anyway but as he spent the working day alongside Izzy he knew how hard she worked and the high-octane, high-stress-level environment she did it in.
‘What would I do without you?’ Izzy batted her eyelashes at him and accepted the prescribed treatment.
‘I think you’d manage pretty well,’ he muttered, refusing to get drawn back into that role of faithful servant he’d become during Janet’s pregnancy. It had hurt that much more when it had all been taken away from him, knowing she’d been taking advantage of his devotion and making a fool out of him. He wasn’t going to let that happen twice in his lifetime.
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