by SM Olivier
He was just one of many that may never have wanted to be adopted or wasn’t adopted by the Isaacs,’ but they still had a considerable impact on their lives. It always amazed me the new things I was learning about the complexities of their lives before coming into it.
“It’s been a while since I’ve celebrated Thanksgiving with other people,” I admitted before turning to Lucas. His mouth was full, but I could see him attempting to talk.
The last couple of years, mom worked, Sean disappeared, and Lucas and Mickey ended up traveling to Lucas’ brother’s college for the holidays. Since Yoon had passed away, they didn’t celebrate holidays the same. Madison would invite me on occasion, but her family liked taking vacations to places like Greece, Paris, and the Bahamas over school holidays.
“You’re invited and so is your dad,” I said, aptly interpreting his look.
I knew his older brother wouldn’t mind. He was so self-absorbed, and nowadays he seemed almost annoyed by his dad and brother. Yoon had been the glue to hold their family together. Now with her gone, he wasn’t even going to attempt to pretend family meant anything to him anymore.
“Sweet,” Lucas gushed. “I can’t wait. I’ll tell dad now…” He started to rush out of the room.
“It’s still like a month and a half away,” I protested with a laugh.
He ignored me as he bounded forward.
I laughed once more and shook my head.
“I’ll start reaching out to the others.” Zane smiled warmly at me. “If you’re sure?”
I nodded. “I’m sure.”
I still had a long way to go to reach a “normal” level, but I had to make goals and work towards them, otherwise, the darkness lurking at the edges would continue to pursue me. It was best to acclimate quickly and stay busy so it wouldn’t consume me.
“Sweet!” Chad said excitedly with a sub raised to his mouth. “I get to see my future sister-in-law with her harem, and I get front row seats when the others realize what’s going on.”
“Chad,” Crew and Kyler growled out together as the others, not in our family, looked at him in confusion.
Chad chuckled and winked at me. “I swear it’s never dull in the Isaacs’ household, and I remember when we had that homicidal kid with Tourettes living with us.”
I looked over at Lochlann, who grimaced and shrugged.
Wow. That was another story I wanted to hear about.
“Have room in your harem, beautiful?” Chad grinned at me.
I heard Crew and Kyler growl once more, and I wavered between embarrassment and annoyance by him placing me in the spotlight in front of my Shadows and the other men that had come into work today.
I smiled guilelessly and shook my head at him. “Sorry, it’s full, and I already told you I’m only interested in real men.”
The room erupted in laughter once more, and I winked at him as he gave me a mock crestfallen look.
He shrugged. “I’m still dropping the bike off myself.”
“You’re really pushing your luck, Chad.” Golden smirked at him. “I didn’t forget how much you dislike mice. I’ll go to the pet store and release them in your room if you continue to hit on my girl.”
Chad's face lost color. “That’s cold, man.” He shuddered, then scowled at Golden.
“Do you remember when that little one got into the painting booth last month?” Ronnie chuckled as he elbowed one of the other employees, who laughed.
“Screamed like a little girl,” the guy said.
We all laughed at Chad’s expense, and it felt so good to feel this at ease in front of new people. None of them seemed to dissect me or made me feel uncomfortable. For that, I was thankful.
“Mice are creepy,” Sal muttered.
More laughter ensued.
“It would be nice to take a road trip.” Ronnie smiled. “You have room for us, Loch?”
“We have a competition to attend this coming weekend, then Homecoming the week after. How about three weeks from now?” Loch looked over at me.
I nodded in agreement.
“And you know we have plenty of room. Even for you, Chad.” Lochlann grinned at the other man.
“I’ll get a hotel room, but I’m still delivering the bike,” Chad muttered mutinously.
Once again, laughter lit up the breakroom. The guys were ruthless as they teased Chad.
They began talking about the delivery and visit details as I finally took a bite of my sandwich. I spent the rest of lunch listening to the easy camaraderie between the men. When I was nearly finished, I realized I wasn’t the only one that needed this outing: the guys seemed to have needed it just as much.
It was just a bonus that we were doing it together and “healing” as one.
6
●
Breathe with Me
The weekend went by entirely too fast. It felt like I had barely blinked and it was Sunday night.
Now back home, I had just put Clay down for the night while Maisie was in the shower. Her music was blaring, and I knew I had the unpleasant task of asking her to turn it down once more.
She had just discovered a love for music within the last week or so. I believed Golden felt some residual guilt for ignoring her, so he had purchased a small mp3 player. Later, she’d confiscated Paxton’s Bluetooth speaker and conned him into syncing it with her mp3 player.
She was growing up way too fast. Over the last few weeks, she also decided that baths were “babyish” and wanted to take showers, which wouldn’t be so bad if she didn’t insist on spending hours in there as well. I wasn’t ready for these teenage tendencies quite yet. If she was exhibiting this type of… attitude now, I was frightened to see how she behaved once hormones raged through her body.
Lochlann came out of his room and gave me a rueful smile as I gently closed Clay’s door behind me. He shook his head at me in silent commiseration and gently knocked on the bathroom door right as Maisie started belting out, off-key, the lyrics of Lose You To Love Me by Selena Gomez. It was so loud, and she was butchering the words. I covered my mouth to contain my giggle as she sang words that were definitely not in the song.
Lochlann chuckled too before he opened the door. “Hey, Mai?” he called out. “I’m turning down your music, and you need to sing quietly so you don’t wake up your brother.”
“Get out!” she immediately squealed. “No boys allowed! I need my privacy.”
Lochlann sighed deeply before pushing his glasses up with his thumb and forefinger to rub the bridge of his nose in vexation. “I’m not ready for this,” he muttered. “I thought I had a few more years yet.”
I laughed once more. “I got this.” I stepped into the room. “Hey, Mai?” I called out louder. “I’m turning down your music and checking on your mop.”
By mop, I meant her hair. Maisie’s hair was outrageously long and fell to her waist. It was also super thick, so she tended to leave shampoo or conditioner in it because she didn’t know how to wash it properly quite yet.
“Thanks,” Lochlann muttered before he began to turn away.
I grabbed his wrist. “Can I sleep with you tonight?” I inquired.
We rarely shared the same bed. I think Lochlann was still cautious about being caught, especially with my Shadows in the house. We had finally convinced them to take the apartments above the garage tonight. I was slightly salty when Cooper went over my head and asked Grandpa if it was permissible not to be directly in the same household as me.
After this weekend, I thought we had made some headway. Cooper seemed more relaxed and laid back than I had ever seen him, and I’m pretty sure a bromance had formed between Sal and Kyler. Unfortunately, Cooper was back in timeout for me. Little Snitch.
I was just thankful Grandpa assured him that it was more than copasetic for them to move out there with the other security measures we installed. He even suggested that they work out a schedule to take a couple of days off a week, and either mornings or evenings off. He informed them that they didn’t
need to be on duty twenty-four seven.
“I’d love that,” Lochlann murmured before placing a kiss on my forehead.
“Get out!” Maisie shrieked once more. “No boys!”
I turned to see her mutinous expression, and sure enough, soap suds clung to the crown of her hair. We wanted to let her exercise her independence, but we realized it would take some time before we felt confident that she could handle some tasks without supervision. Showers were one of her undertakings, but she was adamant that none of the guys help her any longer.
I supported her decision to keep her “privates” private, but it made it harder for me since I was the only female in the house. I didn’t mind it, but I learned how to time her showers now, so it didn’t interfere with my sleep schedule or interrupt anything else I had going on.
Lochlann gave me another crooked grin and a loud sigh. “See you in a little bit,” he murmured.
I smiled back at him. “I’ll come to your room after I get my stuff ready for tomorrow,” I said quietly in return.
We still were super careful what we said and did in front of Maisie. She was way too observant and had a motor mouth. I could imagine her little butt telling her teacher about Loch and me. Until we figured out a plan of how this was all going to work, we needed to be discreet.
I knew Lochlann had some kind of plan; I just didn’t know what it was yet.
●
After taking my shower and packing my dance and school bag, I slipped back upstairs. The house was relatively quiet, and I knew everyone had sought out their rooms. Even with a house full of people, it was almost eerily quiet.
Since my return, Kyler, Crew, and Zane had chosen their rooms here. I really appreciated their presence, despite the fact they had their own homes. I knew Kyler and Crew would go home from time to time to check on it or pick up some stuff, but they were here the majority of the time. As for Zane, I couldn’t remember the last time he ran home for anything.
After school, he saw his mother on the days he taught classes or didn’t have a late practice. It seemed to be enough for Anya.
I was surprised that Anya hadn’t seemed to mind when Zane essentially told her that he was moving in here for an indefinite period. Her ability to recognize our mutual desire to be near each other truly touched my heart. She was rising in esteem in my eyes the more I got to know her.
After Yoon, she was probably the second most significant female role model ever to grace my life. I loved my previous dance instructor, but she hadn’t seemed to care about my personal life as much as Anya did. I couldn’t forget her support of my relationships and judgment-free approach to them as well.
I finally reached Lochlann’s room, and my hand was poised over the door to knock when he unexpectedly opened the door. My initial reaction was fear, but then it turned into amazement. I had rarely seen him without his glasses, and his eyes were brilliantly blue without the reflection of the glass.
Don’t get me wrong, he was sexy as hell with them on; but without them, there was no barrier to prevent me from appreciating the blue of his eyes. His eyelashes were surprisingly long and dark for his fairer coloring.
He must have asked me something, but I was unable to compute his words. I was too dumbfounded by his natural beauty.
“You have beautiful long lashes,” I blurted out in semi-embarrassment.
It wasn’t the only thing beautiful on him. He was already dressed for bed, or should I say undressed. His lean, sculpted chest was on display, and his dedication to lifting weights and working out was evident. His pajama bottoms were just low enough to show his tempting Adonis belt. I didn’t know if it was just him or my forced celibacy that made me acutely feel my desire. I had a feeling that, with or without being celibate for the last few weeks, his lack of dress would still have made that burn of hunger deep in the pit of my stomach.
He chuckled, interrupting my ogling before he reached out for my hand and led me towards the king-size bed that nearly dominated one of his walls. In my absence, he’d hired Kyler's new interior decorator. He had made his parent’s old room into his own.
Paxton and Golden readily agreed with it and told him that, since he was the estates' executor, he had every right to make that decision.
With that decision made, he couldn’t comfortably sleep in the room the way his parents had left it. His master suite had less feminine touches and had a more masculine modern vibe without feeling like you were overdosing on testosterone. It was sleek, clean, and had undercurrents of warmth like the man himself.
“I have to trim my lashes constantly,” he informed me sheepishly. “They rub against my glasses frequently and annoy the crap out of me.”
I laughed, imagining him with a pair of cuticle scissors trimming his eyelashes. “It’s such a shame to let them go to waste,” I teased. “Have you tried wearing contacts?”
He folded the blanket down on my side before he slipped in on his side. It took me a second to realize he seemed chagrined by the question.
“Promise you won’t laugh?” He gave me a lopsided tilt to his lips.
I held up the universal sign for scout’s honor even though I had never been a scout. He softly chuckled before I saw him physically swallow.
“I hate eyeballs,” he muttered, nearly unintelligible.
I had to hide my laugh of disbelief. “I’m sorry.” I cleared my throat. “Did you just say that you hate eyeballs?”
He rolled his eyes at me with a smirk. “Yes,” he said in exasperation. “I freak out over eyeballs. When I try to put in contacts, I can’t physically do it.”
I couldn’t help it. The visual Lochlann’s words evoked was entirely too much. I began to giggle. I tried to stop. Honestly, the look on Loch’s face had me laughing once more. I curled in on myself. I held my stomach as it literally began to hurt. I tried to catch my breath. And for the first time in a long time, I felt the laughter wasn’t just surface laughter, but the kind of laughter born from the depths of my soul.
“Knock it off,” Lochlann mock growled before he launched himself across the bed. He put me on my back, captured my hands, and pinned them above my head before straddling my hips. “If this is the way you react when I reveal my deepest darkest fears, I won’t tell you anymore.”
Lochlann was generally my most serious man. He was always so austere and carried the weight of his family and all our problems on his shoulders. He was such a stark contrast to Kyler; it was hard to believe that they were best friends. Kyler hid his demons behind his flirting and jokes, but Lochlann masked his with stoicism and seriousness.
I loved seeing these brief glimpses of his playful side. I loved watching him lower his guard. It was so uncommon, and I basked in this rare glow.
The look on his face made me laugh harder as I tried to buck him off with an upwards thrust of my hips.
“I can’t believe you get creeped out by eyeballs. I can’t see it,” I continued, laughing at my continual use of I in its other context. “I can’t believe you can’t place a thin lens in your eye, but you can use scissors so close to your eye.”
He found a spot right above my hips that was incredibly ticklish and sensitive.
“Nooo!” I howled in protest.
“It’s not nice to laugh at people's phobias,” he grunted as he continued to tickle me.
“Please stop,” I gasped. “You’re going to make me pee myself. I promise I’ll stop,” I wheezed between laughter.
“I don’t think you will,” he said relentlessly.
The need to pee was genuine, and my sides and face were hurting from laughter.
“Please, Loch,” I whined as I tried to buck him off again. “I will!”
I continued to thrash, and he continued to hold me down. When my core rubbed against his groin, I suddenly froze. He was aroused. I was breathless but now for another reason entirely.
He seemed to grasp the fact I’d realized he was hard, and he stilled as well. He closed his eyes, and I physically felt him shudde
r. He seemed to have a silent war within, and I felt the moment he began to pull away. Other than our brief hot moment in the shower, all his touches and affection had bordered on brotherly.
I quickly looped my legs around his hips. “No, don’t leave.” I was still breathless from laughter.
He groaned, and with one hand bracing himself above me on the bed, he took his other and ran it through his abnormally tousled locks. “Don’t make this hard on me, Peyton. Just a few more weeks and I can be free to show you how much I want you without feeling like I’m crossing a line.”
“I think we already crossed that line.” I frowned.
I didn’t want to push him out of his comfort zone, but I needed to move past this invisible barrier that had been erected between us. In so many ways we were closer, but it still wasn’t enough for me. I didn’t want my other relationships to feel like they were progressing while ours was at a standstill in a constant state of pause.
“I know,” he self-deprecatingly muttered as he dipped his head in the crook of my neck and shoulders.
I knew I shouldn’t tempt him further, but I couldn’t help but grind myself against him. He groaned, and I nearly smiled when he succumbed and began to brush featherlight kisses across my collar bone. I released my hands from his loose grip and delved my fingertips in his sandy-blond hair.
He continued to kiss me up to my jawline until he captured my lips with his. His kiss was sensual and thorough, just like him. I opened my mouth to his probing tongue and moaned at how erotic his movements were. His fingers skimmed under my shirt, and I quivered at the contact.
After several moments of making out, I started getting impatient and began to run my hands against his smooth, hard body. I smiled against his lips when I realized he must shave his chest, because I felt a slight stubble against my fingertips. I knew some guys that lifted as much as he did participated in that grooming routine.
