Amanda and Angel were chatting away as they got ready, but Janie only caught about a third of their conversation. Alexandra was busy being fussed over by the hair stylist, looking uncomfortable with the whole process.
Once Janie was as pretty as she was going to get, she did her duty and went over to check on the bride.
“How are you feeling? Nervous?” Janie asked, smiling.
“Impatient is more like it,” Alexandra shot a meaningful glance at the stylist and Janie laughed.
“I bet. Can I get you anything? A mimosa, maybe?”
“God, yes. Please.”
“Coming up.”
Janie went over to the table where an array of fruit and pastries were spread out for them to snack on while they got ready. There also happened to be two chilled bottles of champagne and a carafe of orange juice, along with four glasses.
Janie went ahead and mixed one for each of them and then took them around to each woman, beginning, of course, with the bride.
“I propose a toast.” Amanda raised her glass and glanced around at each woman. “To my beautiful sister and the badass bitches she’s lucky enough to have for bridesmaids.”
Alexandra laughed and rolled her eyes but shouted, “Here, here!” before draining half of her glass, much to the chagrin of the stylist who was trying to curl her hair.
Amanda drained her entire glass and then handed it back to Janie with a wink. Angel sipped hers politely and then set it aside as she finished fixing her long dark hair.
When the stylist finally left, Alexandra slumped in her chair and heaved a sigh of relief.
“That took forever,” she complained.
“But you look stunning,” Janie said.
“I do, don’t I?” Alexandra smirked. “I guess it’s time for the dress.” Alexandra sat up and clapped her hands together excitedly.
Alexandra was not one to get overly excited about clothes, but when she’d found her dream dress at that second hand shop, it had been love at first sight. As soon as she’d tried it on, there had been no doubt that it was the perfect dress for her.
They moved to the closet and Janie pulled out the garment bag that contained Alexandra’s wedding dress. Alexandra put a hand on Janie’s arm and looked over her shoulder to where the other two girls were still chatting and drinking their mimosas.
“I sent the package to Connor this morning with a note explaining what he needed to do. He sent one back a little while ago and said he’d do it.”
“Thank you,” Janie replied. Her eyes began to water. She was so truly grateful to have such an amazing loyal friend. Who else would go out of their way for a friend on their own wedding day?
“Of course. Honestly, I’m excited to see how this all plays out,” Alexandra giggled and then quickly covered her mouth as if she’d said something she shouldn’t. Janie wanted to ask if maybe Alexandra knew something that she didn’t, but she decided to let it go. It was Alexandra’s day, after all. She didn’t want to monopolize any more of the day than she already had.
Janie laid Alexandra’s dress down on the bed and unzipped the garment bag, pulling the dress out into the light. The morning sun hit the dress and they all let out a collective gasp.
“You are going to be the most beautiful bride,” Angel said, running a finger gently along the bodice of the dress.
“Alright, ladies,” Amanda said after a moment. “Time to suit up.”
An hour later, Janie, Alexandra, Angel and Amanda were gathered in the small anteroom near the door to the gardens where the ceremony was going to be held. Alexandra appeared to be a pillar of calm, whereas Janie felt like her heart might explode and she may throw up, not necessarily in that order.
She hadn’t seen Jackson face to face since that horrible night nearly a month ago. The only time she’d even heard his voice was when she’d listened to the voicemail he’d left her. And although she’d listened to it more times than she cared to admit, it wasn’t the same. She was so anxious to finally see him, finally talk to him, that she couldn’t stand still.
When the hotel's event coordinator opened the door to tell them it was time, Janie practically ran for the door, forgetting that she was the last to go down the aisle before Alexandra.
She took a deep, calming breath and moved aside so that Angel and then Amanda could position themselves ahead of her at the door to the gardens. The string quartet began to play Pachabel’s Canon in D and Angel marched away in time to the music with Amanda following a few beats later.
Janie waited and, when it was her turn, made her way down the path on shaky legs. She focused on her steps, rather than at the man standing at the end of the wide aisle. She reminded herself to walk slowly and smoothly, and to smile. She finally reached the end, taking her place beside Amanda, before she risked a glance over at the other side.
Connor stood there in his dress coat and pressed white shirt, his black bow tie perfectly knotted and precisely straight. He wore a red tartan kilt, buckled on the side with a black leather sporran in the front that was decorated with a silver thistle.
It looked good on him, as did the look of hopeful expectation that he wore as he looked down the aisle, waiting for his bride to appear.
Jackson, of course, stood just beside him. Connor looked good in his wedding finery, but Jackson was positively mouthwatering. The black jacket accentuated his broad shoulders and chest and the crisp white shirt showed off his beautifully bronzed skin.
He stood, his hands folded in front of him, a handsome silver watch glinting in the son on his left wrist. She looked up at his face, one she’d come to know so well in such a short time, and simply took the time to appreciate how much she’d missed it; how much she’d missed him.
He looked up and their eyes met. His gaze was intense, but Janie couldn’t tell if it was because he still cared about her, or because he hated her.
The music changed and the guests stood as Alexandra stepped out on her father’s arm. She was practically glowing from head to toe. The dress was a masterpiece of cream colored satin. It was sleeveless with a plunging v-neckline that ended in a champagne colored sash embroidered to match the mesh overlay on the a-line skirt.
The beadwork on the dress was exquisite - the type you could only accomplish by hand. The geometric design gave the dress a vintage art deco feel that suited Alexandra perfectly. It was simple, timeless and positively stunning, just like her.
But the most beautiful feature of all was the smile on Alexandra’s face. It was the smile of a woman who was so deeply, completely in love and about to share the rest of her life with the man of her dreams. She looked at Connor as Alexandra grew closer and the sheer love and joy on his face made her envious.
Janie’s heart squeezed as for just a moment she envisioned herself walking down the aisle toward the man of her dreams - the man standing five feet away. Her eyes watered and Janie dabbed at them gingerly, trying not to smudge her makeup.
Alexandra finally arrived, handing Janie her bouquet of cream and red roses, and the music tapered off.
The ceremony was short and sweet and it was soon time for Connor to kiss the bride. And to everyone’s surprise, it was no ordinary church kiss. Connor kissed her thoroughly, taking his time, and then swept her up in his arms and carried her down the aisle, with Alexandra laughing the whole way.
The music for the recessional played, and Janie took a wobbly step forward, silently blaming the combination of high heels on gras for her near misstep. Jackson stepped forward, offering his arm and she took it, turning her eyes toward the door and focusing on not tripping on her own feet.
Jackson’s arm was warm and firm beneath her fingers and she had to resist the urge to let her hand slide down toward his hand and interlace her fingers with his. She’d remember the way it felt to hold his hand until her dying day and she craved some kind of contact with him, even if it was just holding his hand.
“You alright?” Jackson asked, his low rumble sending a shiver down her spine. G
od, she loved his voice.
She cleared her throat. “I’m fine. You?”
“Yup.”
There was an awkward silence for a moment, and she couldn’t stand it. Now that she’d heard his voice again, she wanted him to keep talking.
“I met your mom. She’s very nice. And very pretty. She has great taste in clothes, too.” Janie knew she was babbling, but she couldn’t seem to stop.
“She liked you too,” he said, his voice laced with amusement.
“Oh, really?” Janie couldn’t help how hopeful she sounded. She wanted Jackson’s mom to like her. She wanted Jackson to like her. She hoped he still did. She hoped she hadn’t completely ruined things between them.
“Yeah.”
There was another pause, and just as they were about to reach their destination, they both spoke at once.
“Janie, I-”
“Jackson -”
“Okay, into the anteroom here, if you would please,” the coordinator said briskly, ushering them back into the room they’d been in earlier. Janie’s hand fell away from Jackson’s arm and they moved apart as they moved into the room. “As soon as the rest of the party is here, we’ll let the guests filter into the reception for the cocktail hour and we’ll get started on the photos.”
Janie nodded and went to take a stand by the window. Amanda and Parker arrived, followed shortly thereafter by Angel and Sam. The moment was gone. There was nothing to do now but wait.
Alexandra and Connor were sitting together on a small loveseat in one corner of the room whispering sweet nothings, or more likely naughty nothings, to each other in low voices.
“That man is all kinds of infuriating,” Amanda muttered, coming to stand beside Janie at the window.
“What?”
“Nothing,” Amanda said, shaking her head. “I could use a drink. Suppose we could get some more of those mimosas delivered down here before we do the photos?”
“Maybe. I don’t know.”
“Ah, well. How long could pictures take, anyway?” Amanda shrugged.
✽✽✽
Two. Fucking. Hours. They’d spent two hours taking photos. They took photos of the couple, then the bridal party, then just the men, then just the women. Then they took photos with the family, then with everyone and their cousin. Then they moved to another location and did it all over again.
Jackson’s face hurt from smiling and his guts were in knots after two hours of being near Janie without actually being able to talk to her or touch her.
Aside from a few stolen words as they’d walked down the aisle together, they hadn’t said a thing to each other.
He’s just stood around, sneaking glances at her when he could. She was absolutely perfect in her dress. He thought all bridesmaid dresses were supposed to be hideous so that the bride looked better or some shit like that, but apparently he’d been wrong.
All three women wore red satin dresses that were similar to Alexandra’s, only the bridesmaids didn’t have any fancy beading and they were cut just above the knee. They all looked nice, but Janie… she was something else.
The red in the dress complimented her smooth, pale skin and the cut accentuated her curves in the best possible way. He wasn’t even sure what she was wearing underneath since no bra he’d ever seen would fit beneath the neckline of that dress.
Her hair fell in soft waves that were pinned so that they draped over one shoulder, exposing the flawless column of her neck, which was uninterrupted by any necklace. The only jewelry she wore was a pair of ruby teardrops dangling from her ears.
He’d had to keep looking away and reminding himself that he was wearing a kilt. He didn’t think Alexandra would appreciate it if he was in her wedding photos sporting wood.
But somehow he’d managed to keep himself in check and make it through without embarrassing himself. When it was time, they lined up at the entrance to the reception hall and waited to be introduced by the MC. Once again, Janie had taken his arm, but this time there would be no opportunity to talk.
Their names were called, they walked into the room, smiling and waving, and took their seats at the head table on either side of where the bride and groom would sit. Finally, Alexandra and Connor were announced and they practically floated onto the dance floor for their first dance.
Soon dinner was served, and it was time for the speeches. Connor and Alexandra made one together, thanking everyone for being there to share the day with them. Alexandra’s father made one, threatening Connor with legal action if he ever hurt his daughter, and Connor’s father made one welcoming Alexandra into the family and introducing her to some of the Scottish customs she could expect when they finally came to visit.
Then it was his turn. He took a deep breath, stood up and delivered the speech that he’d prepared, referencing his notecards when needed. He wasn’t much of a writer, so he’d kept it short and folksy, wishing them well.
And by the time he was done, he really needed a drink. He left the mic stand and made a beeline for the bar, preparing himself for what he needed to do next.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
No. No, no, no…
Jackson was leaving. Just as she was about to give her speech, he’d walked away. She fought down her rising panic and pushed ahead. She had to give her speech. She couldn’t ask them to wait, but if Jackson didn’t hear it, it would be all for nothing.
The MC introduced her and there was nothing she could do except pray that somehow he would hear her. So she cleared her throat, stepped up to the mic, and spoke.
“Those of you who don’t know me are probably expecting me to get up here and say a lot of flowery things about love and how it’s patient and kind. Those of you who do know me are probably expecting some inappropriate, but highly entertaining stories about the happy couple.”
A few people in the crowd laughed and she paused before continuing.
“But, true to form, I’m going to surprise everyone by doing neither. Instead, I’m going to do what I do best and that is be brutally honest. See the truth is, love isn’t perfect. It isn’t always patient or kind. It isn’t a fairytale or a magic spell that miraculously solves all your problems and makes you a better person.
Love is hard. Love is scary. Love is not for the weak or the faint of heart. It’s a trial - a test that will make you question everything that you think you know about yourself. And sometimes… we fail. Because none of us are perfect and sometimes we aren’t prepared for all the ways that love can challenge you.
But, although people and love aren’t perfect, and it doesn’t cure all the world’s ills, if you pass that test, if you withstand that trial, something amazing can happen. You become stronger and braver and better than you ever thought possible.
And although sometimes we fail that test, if you’re lucky, failing will still teach things. Losing love can make you realize how important it really is. And if you’re very lucky, sometimes you get to retake the test and get a second chance.
Love is a crucible that, for a fortunate few, brings you out the other side a better version of yourself than you ever thought you could be. Someone who can see another flawed, imperfect person, a person who make mistakes, and love them anyway. Someone who… can make the decision every single day to be in someone else’s corner.
Connor and Alexandra have been through the fire and have been forged into stronger, braver, better people with a bond as strong as they are. They have chosen to commit themselves to each other, not just today, but every day.
Knowing both of them the way I do, I know that the love they have built for themselves is one that will stand the test of time. But, it won’t be easy, so please join me in wishing them a lifetime of luck and happiness. May you always choose each other. “
Janie lifted her glass to the couple, unshed tears stinging her eyes. Alexandra stood and came around the table, wrapping her in a tight hug.
“I love you,” she whispered in Janie’s ear.
“I love you, too,” Jani
e replied.
“Now,” Alexandra said, pulling back and looking at her with a smile. “Go get your man.”
Janie gave her a shaky smile and nodded.
There was a round of applause, just like after all the other toasts and Janie mustered a smile for the crowd before she hurried away, looking for the only person that mattered.
She skirted the dance floor, barely noticing the couples gathered there, scanning the crowd for any sign of the tall, dark haired man that had captured her heart.
When she finally saw him, she sucked in a breath and held it, steeling herself to tell him all the things she should have said weeks ago.
It was now or never.
He was standing by the bar, tossing back a glass of brown liquid. As soon as he set it down, he looked in her direction as if he’d been expecting her. Janie paused, just barely in her stride, until Jackson started toward her, that same intense look in his eyes.
Her pace quickened without her ever even thinking about it, until she was practically running across the room. Jackson’s steps picked up as well until they were both within a foot of each other. They both stopped dead and just… stood there, looking at each other.
Without a word, Jackson took her hand and turned, leading her out of the room and back to the small space where they’d waited before and after the ceremony. As soon as they were through the door, he closed it and locked it, releasing her hand as he placed both of his on the door, caging her in with his body.
“What you said…” He paused, swallowing hard and searching her face for something. She wasn’t sure what it was, but she didn’t look away. “What does it mean, Janie? Four weeks. A damn month since I’ve seen you or talked to you. You didn’t return my call. I thought for sure that you’d never want to see me again. And then no one could find you for two days. I was so worried about you.”
He stopped, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath.
“What does it mean, Janie. I can’t wait anymore. I need to know,” he said softly, looking down at her again.
Her Defender (MacLachlan Security Group Book 2) Page 27
