by Amber Nicole
After I pull back into the driveway and turn my car off I sit there for a few minutes just trying to get my heart to stop racing and my head in the game. She never told on me. Why? She didn’t owe me a thing. I have been a right asshole to her. The whole senior class has been. Does this mean that after everything I've done she still wants to protect me? She may give me another chance? Do I want another chance? My head is all kinds of fucked, but I do know that I don't want to spend another minute without her in my life again. Gracie is my one. She always has been.
A knock on my window startles me back to the present. “Are you coming in?” Gracie’s brother, Grayson, shouts through the glass. Nodding my head I open my door to get out. He bends over me not, allowing me to move. “You should know she’s leaving. The lies and hallucinations she's been telling us about lately are showing her injury has affected her mental health. So don't get too attached again Tristan.” What the fuck? I'm completely speechless. He stands back up allowing me to exit my car.
“What lies has she been telling, Grayson?” This dude is giving off super sketchy vibes. “How do you know they are lies? What has she said? From what we have discussed I think she has a sound mind.” I walk away from him, but he grips my arm hard and spins me back to him. “What have you discussed, Tristan?” he asks in a squeaky tone. “Answer me Tristan! What has Gracie told you?”
I just watch the color fade from his face, then turn back towards the house. Yeah something fishy is going on here, and if they think they’re sending my girl away they have another thing coming.
22
Gracie
My parents are whispering in the corner by the coffee maker. Damn I really want coffee. “Mom, may I have some coffee please?” Moving out of the way I reach up into the cabinet and grab two mugs, might as well make Ash a cup, we never did get to drink the coffee I made earlier. Pouring the coffees and doctoring it the way I remember he likes his—Omg I remember how he likes his coffee. Doing a happy dance in my mind I walk over and set them on the table before returning to the refrigerator seeing if there is anything to eat. Ah, I forgot I made homemade cinnamon rolls the other night. I grab the plate and stick it in the microwave for thirty seconds just to heat them up a bit. The front door flies open and I turn around to a very frustrated Ash. “You are not sending her away!” he yells at my parents. What? I’m not going anywhere, am I? My parents are sharing a worried expression. “Tristan, how about you take a seat? It seems Gracie has made you a coffee and has heated up some of her homemade rolls. If I remember correctly you used to love them. We have a lot to discuss. I’m not sure who told you we were sending Gracie away. Nothing has officially been decided.” “What!” I shout, “Why would you even be discussing this? Send me away where?”
I walk over to the table, slam the plate down in front of our coffees, then stand in front of my so-called parents. “I’m waiting,” I say, crossing my arms. Ash moves up behind me pulling me in against his chest. I turn to look at him and can see the fury in his eyes. Unwrapping myself from his arms I grab his hand and tug him towards the table, “Come Ash I’m starving and this looks like it’s going to be a long conversation.” I tell him quietly.
Stepping towards the chairs he pulls mine out for me. I look up at him with a small smile, sit down and pull my coffee closer to me while he takes his seat with a loud sigh. Leaning over I push the plate closer to him. I hear him chuckle before snatching one from the plate and grabbing his own coffee. He has a big smile on his face. “You remembered. You really are getting some memories back.” I give him my biggest smile then nod.
“WHAT! You're getting memories back?” Grayson shouts from the doorway. He’s shaking and very pale. “Gray are you okay? Have you eaten today? Come sit down, have a roll.”
Stumbling over to the chair beside Ash he plops down, running his hand over his face. Ash slides the plate his way. Taking a bite he looks at me. “Thanks Gracie, you always have been my sweet girl. I’m fine just a lot going on. Mom, Dad why don't you sit as well we have a lot to discuss.” He waits until my parents are seated before turning to face me. “Gracie there are some things we would like to talk to you about. Some things that have been happening that are causing us some concern. Just let me get everything on the table before you start disagreeing okay?” Looking at the real concern shining through his eyes I nod. Might as well, I mean I'm still waiting on my punishment from disappearing again.
“Okay let’s begin. First your hallucinations. Some of the things we have talked about. Gracie your nightmares are extremely vivid and completely one hundred percent false. Mia would never have tried to kill you, she was your best friend. You're not sleeping, you're losing weight again. You walk around like a zombie half the time. You wake up screaming almost every night. Your panic attacks are increasing and becoming more intense. I think we need to find a solution to this. Now Mom, Dad, and I have discussed this at length there is a six-week program in California for rest and relaxation in a mental health clinic that I think will help you immensely.”
“Six weeks? No, absolutely not, I just got Gracie back. You are not taking her from me for six weeks. Not going to happen. I don’t know what's really going on here but something isn't sitting right with me. These so-called hallucinations you say she's having are while she's asleep. Nightmares happen. I understand that it's affecting her sleep but she didn't toss or turn once last night when she was in my bed.”
My mom gasps and slaps her hand over her mouth, anger shining in her eyes. Cutting Ash off she snaps, “Your bed? So you two are back together again? Or have you just turned into a little slut Gracelyn?”
“Excuse you, when have you started talking to Gracie like that Christine? I’ve heard enough this clinic is complete and utter bullshit. Gracie go pack a bag you’re coming home with me. I don’t trust them not to ship you off in the middle of the night. Also make sure you grab some warmer clothes it's supposed to snow this coming week.”
What? He wants me to live with him? Has he lost his mind? Just yesterday he was throwing me in his trunk and humiliating me. I know we had a breakthrough this morning, but I don't feel one hundred percent comfortable being alone with him twenty-four-seven. But he is right, last night was one of the best sleeps I’ve had since waking up from my coma. Biting my lip I contemplate going with him. “Ash I don’t know if this is the best idea?”
“You're damn right this isn't a good idea. You’re seventeen and not going to live with a boy that you barely remember. Mom tell her no. This is ridiculous. She is going to Ocean Cove for six weeks during the holiday break so she can rest and get back to her old self. She is a danger to herself, and the lies she's been telling could really hurt some people. Plus we have already put down a deposit on an ocean view suite.”
“You wanted to send me away during the holidays?” That really hurts me. I guess Ash had similar feelings because he snorts and rolls his eyes.
“What lies Gray? All I’ve told you about are my nightmares. How are they lies? I know they’re false, I never said they were real. Or are you scared I might decipher some flashbacks about you and my best friend? Is that what you're really worried about?”
“LIES! I told you before Gracie that Mia was like a little sister to me.” Slamming his hand down hard on the table he bends over getting right in my face, practically spitting with anger. “I will not allow you to keep telling lies and ruin my relationship with Anna.”
“Back away from her now Grayson. I have no qualms about punching you in the face.” Ash stands up pushing Gray back into his chair. When have I told lies? “I haven't told a single person what you're saying Gray. I only talked to you, well and Dr. Pepper, about my nightmares and flashbacks. I would never want to ruin your life. I am so confused right now. Ash I don't want to move in with you but I will maybe stay this weekend? I just need to get away from this drama right now.” Getting up I move around the table and head upstairs to pack a bag. I hear Ashton and Grayson screaming at each other from the landing. I sigh,
yeah a weekend away may just be what I need.
23
Ashton
Blown away, I am completely blown away. Who the fuck is this family sitting around me? I know for a fact this isn’t Gracie's family. The family I remember would have done anything to keep Gracie around not send her away, and Grayson—fuck. What the hell happened to him, he’s acting like a paranoid tweaker. Is he on something? Maybe that's what it is; he's on drugs. Not wanting to be around these imposters another minute I stand up ready to follow Gracie when I hear her footsteps coming down the stairs. Perfect timing. Grabbing her bag in one hand I tug her out the door and to my car. I open the door for her then toss her bag in the backseat. Rounding the car to my side I see Grayson standing on the front stoop. Giving him my nastiest look I flip him off, get in my seat, slam the door, start the car then get as far away from that place as I fucking can.
I can see Gracie’s tears in the corner of the rearview. Reaching over I grab her hand and squeeze, not saying a word, but just letting her know that I’m here. We pass the coffee shop we used to frequent. Maybe a caramel macchiato will cheer her up. I go to ask her but she's fallen asleep. Her family was right about one thing. She really does need more sleep. The bags under her eyes are almost purple. I never really noticed them before. Nightmares, she's been having nightmares about that night. Makes sense it was a traumatic thing to live through. Why are they about Mia trying to kill her though? I guess I can agree with Grayson about one thing. That’s definitely a hallucination. Mia had her issues, suffering with a mental illness of her own for most of our teenage years, but she adored Gracie. She told me once that if I didn’t marry her she would. She loved her, and Gracie loved her in return. When we first met Gracie and her family they basically adopted us. Some of the best times of our childhood were spent in the Rose’s kitchen. Mia was there more than I think Gracie was sometimes.
Feeling my butt vibrate I gently let go of Gracie’s hand then wiggle till I can dislodge my phone from my back pocket and the seat while keeping the car on the road. It’s a message from Bianca. Yeah that can wait. Dropping my phone in the cupholder I decide to pull off into the school's parking lot and let Gracie nap.
Her hand moves up my thigh and she slowly undoes my pants. “Baby, I’m so glad you agreed to meet up tonight I haven’t seen you in ages.” Bianca tries to pout in a sexy way, but it just doesn’t do anything for me.
“Look, I’m here for one thing, you know that. So are we hooking up or what?” My voice comes out harsh but she doesn’t seem to notice.
“I know you think you’re not ready to move on baby, but it’s been ages,” she whines.
“Just get out.” I don’t know why I keep doing this. I’m not sure I’ll ever move on.
“Okay, I’m sorry.” She goes back to caressing my thigh. “I can make you feel good baby.”
I don’t stop her, even though I know I should.
Gracie starts to stir letting out the cutest little moan and snapping me out of the horrific memory. The noises only make my attraction to her grow more. I’m dealing with an uncomfortable problem from sitting here listening to her. The sounds she makes in her sleep brings back memories of what we did last night. Forcing myself to think of extremely disturbing images helps just in time. She sits up straight and looks around, and I see the confusion in her eyes.
“Ash, why are we at school? Did you change your mind about me staying the weekend?”
“No, not at all I just wanted to let you sleep. Plus I figured when you woke up you would be hungry so I decided to stay in town. Do you want to grab some lunch?”
She won’t look at me, just keeps staring out the windshield. “Gracie,” I say, gently gripping her chin to turn her head towards me. When her eyes meet mine I see she's on the verge of tears. “Hey come here.” Unclicking her belt I slide her onto my lap causing her to straddle me with her knees. Grabbing her tight around her lower back I hug her, eventually she nuzzles her head into my neck and she grips me hard around the neck returning the hug.
“We will figure all this out okay Gracie? I know I keep saying it but I mean it. I'm sorry for everything I’ve done, and I know that's not enough but I’m going to make this past year of torment and misery up to you. This I promise. So how about that lunch?”
She giggles into my neck. “Okay Ash. Lunch sounds great.” She smiles. I can't help but smile back. Sliding back into her own seat she puts her seatbelt on then looks at me expectantly. “Well? Where are we going?”
Shit right I have to drive. Tearing my eyes from her I start the car and head to one of our favorite places for a quick bite.
“Okay, wow yeah that was delicious. I’m going to have to try and make that sometime.”
“You have. Many times in the past, so I don't think you will have any issues recreating homemade seafood alfredo,” I say laughing at the expression of amazement on her face.
“I’ve made this? Well then we need to go to the store before your house because I’m making it again tomorrow and the next day. So good.”
“How about we just order another for later? I kinda have plans tonight. I’m hoping you will come with me? It’s Smith's eighteenth birthday party. We don’t have to stay long but I do have to make an appearance.”
“Ash I don't think I should, everyone has been really cruel to me and I don't want to deal with the bitches and dicks except maybe Hope.”
I cough so much at her response I end up spitting my water everywhere and everyone stares at me.
“OMG Ash are you okay?” Gracie gets out of her seat running to my side of the booth to pat and rub my back. Trying to calm myself down I take deep breaths then I turn to her. Looking into her eyes I say, “Bitches and Dicks?” I try to get it out with a straight face but I fail miserably. Giving me an odd look she just shrugs her shoulders and then giggles. “Yeah I mean their names are Bianca, India, Tinsley, Cheyenne, and Hope so they are the bitches. Bianca is Queen Bitch a lot of the time in my head. Then you have Dom, Isaiah, Carter, King, and Smith. So the dicks.” Can she be any cuter? I watch as she turns red in embarrassment. No longer being able to hold back I grab her and kiss her hard. She doesn’t take long to kiss me back. Not wanting to get kicked out from Bennies—which happens to be a favorite of ours—I reluctantly pull back, resting my forehead on hers. “That is the best thing I think I have ever heard and I can't wait to call them that sometime. As for your question you will be with me and I won't let them hurt you again.”
“I appreciate that Ash but I think I’d rather just stay home and maybe watch a movie or read. But you go have fun. I'll be okay. To be honest after this morning I need some time to myself. As for the other thing, don't take this the wrong way but I think we should keep this secret. Just between us for a bit. Is that okay?” Looking into her earnest and sincere eyes I would give her anything. “Yes that's fine Gracie. Let’s order you another alfredo and maybe some of their cheesecake. I know you used to love it. Then we can go home and watch a movie until I have to leave for Smith’s. You can try to pick something that you think I might like and I can pretend I really do like it when really I’m watching you, like that one time you convinced me to get into Game of Thrones. How does that sound?” I wink.
She grins at the memory I just gave her. “I remember that! Well you had me at alfredo, but now that you mentioned cheesecake I say yes thank you that sounds amazing.”
Giving her another quick kiss I flag the waiter down and place her order to go. We sit and talk about what movie to watch while we wait then grab her food and head home. Today started out rough but it ended perfectly. I got my girl back, even if it’s only for the weekend.
24
Gracie
I’ve been here over a month now, but in my defense Ash keeps the nightmares away. I’m getting the best sleep I’ve ever had. We’re still keeping things secret but when it’s just us we’re working our way back to being Gracie and Ash again, and I’m happy, really happy.
I’m getting my Ash back,
not that shell of a man I had been introduced to when I woke up from the coma. Memories are slowly returning to me, like the way Ashton always made me feel safe even when we were young. He wasn't just the love of my life, he was my best friend. The one I would call when my parents were fighting. The one who would cuddle on the couch and read to me when I was sick and my head hurt too bad.
He was there when I got my first period and was too scared to tell anyone—you can imagine me enjoying the memory of that one, not. He would wake in the middle of the night and call me if I couldn't sleep. He would give me flowers just because. Pink roses because they were my favorites. Things aren't completely back to the way things were before, and I don’t think they ever will be. We have a lot to overcome still, but I'm happy to have this Ash, even if it is in secret. We told Dom, and Hope but I trust them to keep it to themselves. We still haven't discussed anything about Mia, but I know that time is coming. I enter the locker room and come face to face with Queen Bitch, great I’ve been lucky these past few weeks I haven't seen much of her besides that god-awful GIF she's been posting all over social media. Yeah, Ash didn't know the day he threw me in with the pigs Bianca hid and recorded everything. Everyone thought it was hilarious, and even funnier to fill my lockers with manure. Yeah nasty. Thankfully that only lasted a few weeks. A sex tape of Bianca and her math tutor was suddenly released all over the school. Ash denies it, but I have a feeling he was a part of it. I think I’m starting to love him again. Bianca disappeared for the rest of the month. It’s almost been peaceful. I’m putting my uniform on when Hope sneaks over.
“Hey,” she whispers at me. I give her a smile in return. “Are you coming to the holiday party at Dom’s after this? From what I’ve heard Bianca isn't coming. I don’t know what Ash’s plans are but he never misses Dom’s family party. You should come. Shit I have to get back over there before they know I’m missing. Text me if you decide to come okay?” she runs back towards her locker right before Bianca comes over to her side. Whew that was close. Just another secret relationship I’m keeping, but I really enjoy my talks and girls’ days with Hope. Her and Dom seem to like each other so she comes around a lot when he just happens to be over at Ash’s. It's actually really cute. I slam my locker shut and my phone lights up.
