Annalise’s hand flew to her mouth. “His sister? And his nephew? Are you serious? Holy cow. I’m so glad I was right – I mean, not that I was right, but that he didn’t keep something like that from you. Or that he’s not a cheating jerk. And seriously, Sammie. I’ve spent the last day and a half thinking about how you were right. I did kind of push you into this, after you said you didn’t want to date anybody for a while. I made you call him back when you said you didn’t want to. It’s your life, and I shouldn’t have pressured you like that. I’m sorry. Of course I forgive you! Can you forgive me?”
“Of course,” I said, and I felt most of the tension in my body that had been building up leave with one big exhale. My best friend didn’t want to ditch me. I could deal with anything in life, as long as I still had Annalise. “And you were right to push me. I was so scared of taking a chance and getting hurt again. You’re never going to truly know happiness if you never know what it’s like to be hurt, are you?”
I was such a baby. I didn’t mean to, but I felt tears spring up in my eyes. Annalise really was just looking out for me.
“And I didn’t want you to know regret, like I do,” she said, sounding tearful herself. “I think about it all the time. Things I wish I’d done differently. When you click with someone, sometimes you just know, right? Then sometimes things happen and you can’t turn back time and do things differently. I didn’t want you and me to be sitting around the table together having tea, fifty years from now, two old maids with remorse for what did hadn’t done. I don’t want either of us to wonder how our lives might have ended up differently.”
I’d never seen my best friend like this before – brave, bold, fearless Annalise, with a red nose and teary eyes. “What do you mean?” I asked her. “I mean, I know what you mean, but it sounds like you’re talking more than just me and my fear.”
She reached out for a paper napkin and blew her nose. I waited. “Me and Ben,” she finally explained.
My jaw dropped. “But I’ve been helping you explain to your parents for the last four months why you ended things! We went over the list together so many times before you did it. You didn’t think you were compatible long term. Kids, money, travel, family, work... all of that. He wanted one thing, you wanted another.”
“I know,” she said. “But who’s to say that we wouldn’t change our minds one day? I miss him so much, Sammie. I think about him all the time. I still love him. I remember our first date and it was just like the way you described your date with Blake. Fun, sweet, exciting. Sometimes when someone comes in to your life you just know, right? You know they’re going to be a big part of your life. I didn’t want you to miss out on that and have regrets.”
“He’s somewhere upstairs right now,” I said. “He was in that warehouse. I heard on the news that three firefighters were transported to St. Luke’s to be treated, so I came here. I know I don’t belong here, but I couldn’t help it.”
“You didn’t miss your chance,” said Annalise. “You should go find him.”
“You didn’t miss yours either,” I told her. “It’s not too late. You can still call him. Tell him what you told me.”
She looked hesitant. “You know I hate to admit when it I’m wrong. Maybe he’s moved on by now.”
“Well, that’s just silly. Letting something like pride stop you from having the future you want and deserve. You’ll never know unless you try, right?”
“You got me there.” Annalise smiled at me through her tears. “Maybe I will call him. Tomorrow. Tonight’s your chance. Now or never, right?”
I nodded and got up from the table. I walked quickly towards the elevator, and before I could change my mind, got in and quickly pressed the button for the third floor.
The Pine Ridge hospital wasn’t all that big, but still, it was easier to find the firefighters than I’d thought. Two TV cameras and a couple journalists were hanging out at a nurses’ station, trying to get information. I hovered in the background, scanning the hallways for a familiar face.
“Can you give me any comment on the extent of the injuries?” asked one reporter.
“I’m not at liberty to give that information,” said the nurse, in a monotone that told me it wasn’t the first time she was telling them.
I didn’t recognize any of the reporters, but on the other side of the nurses’ station, filling up a paper cup at the water cooler, I thought I recognized the woman I’d seen interviewed on TV who had said Blake was her brother. He was the older one, I remembered him saying, and she was a tough-as-nails tomboy named Camille. I looked closer, and I was pretty sure it was her.
I took a deep breath and remembered Annalise’s words. Now or never. I walked over to the woman. “Hi,” I said. “Are you Camille? Um, Blake’s sister?”
She looked at me warily. “Where are you from?”
“Pine Ridge,” I answered, before I realized what she meant. “Oh! No, I’m not a reporter or a journalist or anything. I’m a librarian, I’m Sammie, I know your brother.”
“He didn’t mention you,” she said, studying me.
“I, um oh, I’m so sorry, I’m so awkward. I went out with him, not a lot, just a few times.” A few sounded so much better than once, so I let the little white lie rest. “I was just wondering how he’s doing. I texted him as soon as I saw the fire to see if he was okay, but I know he’s been too busy to reply. I saw you on the news, and heard that firefighters were taken here, so… well, I came.”
She relaxed a bit. “Oh, okay. Yeah, he’s here. He’s doing fine. He had to jump out a window so they wanted to check him out. He didn’t run out of air so he didn’t have to be treated for smoke inhalation or anything. I’m just waiting for him to be released so I can drive him home. They’re not going to keep him overnight.”
“Oh, that’s such good news! You must have been so worried.”
She seemed to warm up to me a little more. “Yeah, it’s been an anxious night for us. Clay was pretty upset. I know he’s probably too little to really understand, but he and Blake are so close. He’s more than an uncle to him, you know? I don’t know how much Blake has told you, but Clay’s dad isn’t really in the picture anymore, so Blake’s filled the gap in every way he could.”
He hadn’t told me any of that, but I just nodded like I knew what she was talking about. Now wasn’t the time to get into personal histories. “He told me you guys were close.” He had, technically, said that. I just hadn’t known that there was a nephew in the picture as well.
“I don’t know what I’d do without him,” Camille sighed. “If you want someone you know is always going to be there for you, Blake’s the person you need.”
“Do you think I could see him?” I blurted out, before I could stop myself. “Just for a minute or two. I know that he needs to go home soon and rest.”
Camille only paused for a second. “Sure,” she said eventually. “He’s just down the hall. Room three-eleven.”
“Thanks a lot,” I smiled at her to show appreciation as best I could. Then I took a deep breath and walked down the hall until I came to his room. The door was ajar, but I couldn’t hear any voices coming from inside. So I knocked.
18
Blake
“Almost done,” the nurse at St. Luke’s told me. “I just need to run through your vitals one more time and then we can pronounce you good to go. I’m sure you want to get home and get some sleep in your own bed.”
“I sure do,” I said. “Nothing against your hospital, but there’s nothing like your own bed.”
“Agreed,” said the nurse. “I’m going to go get your chart and a blood pressure cuff and I’ll be back in just a few minutes. Don’t go anywhere, now,” she joked, and left the room.
“No worries,” I smiled, and sat back in the chair. There was a bed in the hospital room, but I didn’t want to sit on it. I wasn’t hurt. I didn’t need to be in a bed I wasn’t going to be sleeping in.
Joe had suffered from smoke inhalation and was going to
have to stay in the hospital for a few days. I was so thankful it wasn’t worse. Ashley and the kids would be getting him back living and breathing and all in one piece. Nobody knew yet why the air tank on Joe’s back hadn’t been full. Maybe it hadn’t been put away properly, or maybe there was a leak in it. There would be time in the days and weeks ahead to do an investigation and figure all that out, but for now, we were all just grateful that Joe was still with us.
Camille had stopped by my house and picked up some jeans and a T-shirt for me to change into when I left the hospital, and was waiting out in the hallway to drive me home once I was discharged. She had raced to the hospital with Clay after the ambulance, and she’d only broken down when she’d found out I was fine. Clay was asleep on the hard plastic couch in the visitors’ lounge, so I was eager to get out of here so he could get in his own bed as well.
There was a small, hesitant sounding knock on the door. Usually the nurses just barged right in. “Come in,” I yelled.
But it wasn’t the nurse who came through the door. It was Sammie Rowell. I’ve never been more surprised in my life.
She smiled shyly when she saw me. “Hi, Blake.” She took a timid step into the room.
“Sammie,” I said. “Whoa. You’re pretty much the last person I thought I’d see here tonight.” After a rough day at the office, my filter wasn’t tuned up.
“I know,” she said. “I’m sorry. Um, I think I owe you an apology. Scratch that, I know I owe you one.”
“You don’t owe me anything.” I shrugged. “Your feelings are your feelings. You didn’t owe me a date if you didn’t want to spend any time with me. You’re allowed to date who you want.”
“But that’s just it,” she said. “I did like you, a lot. I do, I mean. Present tense, not past tense.” She gave a quick smile, and I felt my heart swell. “I didn’t make my decision based on accurate information.”
“What do you mean?”
“I saw you at the mall on Saturday,” she confessed, her cheeks reddening a bit with embarrassment. She looked away for a moment then looked back at me. “Um, this is really hard to tell you. It’s not my finest moment, for sure. So… I was out shopping with my best friend and I saw you there with a little boy.”
“That was my nephew,” I said. “Clay, my sister, Camille’s, little boy. The rest of our family is in Texas, and Clay’s dad is mostly absent. So I help her out whenever I can, with babysitting, or whatever she needs.”
Sammie nodded. “I know that now,” she said. “I talked to Camille outside a bit, in the hallway. But when I saw you with Clay that day I assumed that he was your son. Um, he really does look a lot like you. My imagination ran away a little bit and I was picturing you secretly married with a kid, going out two-timing your wife with me.” Her words spilled out fast like she was trying to get past her confession as quickly as possible.
I burst out laughing. I couldn’t help it. “Wow, I must have given a terrible first impression if that was the first thing you thought of! I would’ve told you if you asked me, you know. I hang out with Clay and Camille all the time. We’re all we’ve got around here. It would have come up soon enough, I just didn’t want to bombard you with my family history all in one night.”
“I know,” she said. “I should have asked you about it. Better still, I should have come over to see you guys when I saw you. I was just cautious about dating again. My last relationship ended kind of badly, and I was paranoid and looking for red flags where there weren’t any. And please understand something… this was about my insecurities and not about your first impression. Please believe me on that. I feel like I’m saying this a lot lately, but do you think you could forgive me?”
My head was full of thoughts tumbling over each other, fighting for attention. Joe in the burning building. The convoy in Iraq under fire. Sammie’s delighted face on the Ferris wheel. Clay and Camille. Leaving the library that day, humiliated after being turned down flat. And now Sammie in front of me, explaining why she had turned me down, and asking for forgiveness.
I was slightly offended that she had automatically thought the worst of me, but then again, it had taken a lot for her to come here and admit she’d been wrong. And I couldn’t lie, I hadn’t been able to get her out of my head.
“Of course. That’s an easy one.” I smiled at her, and she smiled back. She let out a breath I could only assume indicated relief.
The moment was interrupted by the nurse who came bustling back in, holding a thermometer and a blood pressure cuff. “Let’s just get you all sorted out,” she announced, expertly wrapping the cuff around my arm while simultaneously sticking a thermometer in my mouth. “Oh! You’ve got a guest. Who’s this?”
“I’m a friend,” said Sammie to keep me from having to answer with a thermometer in my mouth.
“Are you the one driving him home?” asked the nurse, taking the thermometer out of my mouth. “Or was that your sister.”
“His sister is driving him,” said Sammie, at the same time as I answered, “Yes, she’s the one driving me home.”
Sammie stared at me. “You want me to drive you?”
“Of course,” I said. “I think we have a few things to talk about, and I’ve got a little time right now. No need to put it off.”
The nurse smiled and backed out of the room. “Well, you’re officially discharged, so you’re free to leave whenever, and however, you want.”
I kept my eyes on Sammie after the nurse was gone. “Well? What do you say? Mind giving me a lift?”
She beamed back at me. “Not in the least,” she said. “I’ll take you home now, but maybe we can get together for dinner tomorrow night. I’m assuming you won’t be on shift for another couple of days.”
“You’re right. I’ve got some down time coming. So about dinner. You mean it?”
“You bet I do.” She reached out and took my hand, and together, we walked out of the hospital.
Epilogue
Sammie
I couldn’t stop laughing. Blake and Ben had been cracking blonde jokes all night long. Joe had wisely kept his mouth shut since Ashley told better blonde jokes than he did. She was blonde after all, so she had more right to tell them than any of us did. Honestly, Ashley told better jokes of any kind, anyway.
It had been eight months since the night of the Union Avenue fire and Joe’s close call. Eight months since I’d driven Blake home from the hospital once he’d been deemed fit as a fiddle. And it had been seven months since he’d told me he loved me. Since that night, I’d been on top of the world.
Many things had changed during that time. I’d learned to trust again, but with Blake’s sure and steady approach to relationships, that hadn’t been that difficult. Champ was now a regular at my house and I loved having him around. I’d become friends with Joe and Ashley and loved them as much as Blake did. We’d become the fearsome foursome so fast it was almost impossible to remember exactly how it happened.
Then suddenly, our little circle grew. Annalise had taken her own advice with my encouragement. She’d called Ben and poured her heart out to him. They were now engaged again and would be married in just a few short weeks. The six of us had a group date night at least once a month.
“Right, Samantha?” I came back to the present when I heard Annalise say my name.
I blinked and looked around sheepishly. “Oops. I zoned. What was that?”
“I was just saying I’m looking forward to the fair this year. You can run across the most interesting finds there. Did you ever tell Blake what happened at the fair last year?” Her conspiratorial look made me cringe. I’d never mentioned to Blake that I’d seen him in the calendar. It wasn’t that I didn’t want him to know, there just hadn’t been a reason to tell him.
Blake’s eyebrows went up. “Why would she have to tell me what happened there last year, Annalise? I was there with her.”
Annalise laughed and everyone else but me leaned in to see what she meant. I breathed out and turned my head. “Co
me on, Sammie. Tell him. There’s no harm in it now.”
Joe let out a whistle. “Whoa. This must be good. I can hardly wait.” Ashley elbowed him and tried to keep a straight face.
“Annalise, do I know this story?” Ben leaned over to her and whispered loud enough that everyone could hear.
“No, you do not, my love. But when you hear it, you’ll be entertained.” She looked at Blake and smirked. “You promise not to get mad, Blake?”
“Now you’ve got me worried. I’m not easy to anger, so if you think I might get mad I have no idea what’s up.” He turned to me and tilted his head. “So what have you been hiding from me, Sammie? I’m man enough to take it no matter what it is. And of course, Champ here is too crazy about you for me to get away with anything that might jeopardize his spot on your couch.”
“Annalise, I’m going to kill you. Really.” I wasn’t sure I was up to sharing this in front of everyone, but I wasn’t thinking fast enough to deflect. And in reality, there truly wasn’t any harm in telling him about it now. I glanced sideways at Blake and smiled grudgingly. “It’s not that big of a deal.”
“Cool. Then you can tell me what she’s talking about.” He leaned over and his eyes blazed with humor as he bumped my shoulder with his.
“Oh, all right. I went to the fair with Annalise the weekend before I met you.” I shrugged. I was about to continue when he cut me off.
“That’s it? Wow, some bombshell. I have no idea why you kept that from me. Annalise, good call to make sure I was made aware of her deception.” He snickered and got up to get a second slice of chocolate cake.
“Oh, that’s not the main part of the story. In fact, that’s nothing more than a little-bitty set up to the main event.” Annalise gestured for me to continue.
First Impressions (Hero Hearts: Firefighter) Page 9
