by J. Sterling
I turned to face them both. “You’re not going to be mean again, are you?” I directed the question toward my dad.
“I’m going to try my damnedest, but that’s a hard habit to break.”
I knew he was talking about me and James being together. But this was something I was willing to fight for now. Once being with James had become an actual option, something we could both have without causing our parents to kill one another, I realized just how badly and deeply I wanted the chance to be with him. There would be no giving up on us now. I refused to go down without a damn good fight, and I braced myself for it, assuming that it was about to come even though my dad had just been cordial as hell.
My mom interjected, “Your father will absolutely behave himself and be on his best behavior from this night forward. Won’t you, dear?”
He looked down at the woman he’d been married to for over thirty years and grimaced only slightly as he responded, “I’m going to try.”
“Uh-uh.” My mom shook her head with disapproval. “You’re going to do more than try.”
My dad swallowed hard, and I watched the lump in his throat move up and down. “I’ll be nice,” he slid out under his breath.
My mom patted his arm like he was a good boy. “Didn’t you have something you wanted to say to Julia?” She continued to direct the conversation, and I felt like I was in an episode of The Twilight Zone where everything was a little backward and roles had reversed.
“I’m sorry I kicked you out. I was wrong to do that. Even with or without what happened tonight, I should have never done that to you. I was just so mad; I couldn’t see straight.” He tugged at his salt-and-pepper hair, the distress written all over his tired eyes.
“I know.” I started to add that it was okay but stopped myself because it wasn’t, and I didn’t want to excuse his behavior.
“I think I was mostly mad because I had known it was coming. I had seen that storm brewing in the distance years ago, and I knew, once you crossed that line, there’d be no going back for either of you. I knew I wouldn’t be able to keep you two away from each other, no matter what I did. Can you ever forgive me for trying?”
My eyes watered with my dad’s admission. “If you can forgive the Russos, Dad, I’m willing to forgive just about anything,” I said and meant it, my heart feeling so full that I thought it might burst inside my chest and flood my entire body. Ten more seconds, and I’d drown in a sea of my heart’s own emotions.
Thankfully, the words stopped, and I hugged each of my parents before heading outside. I cast a quick glance at the Russo house and noticed that all the lights were still on. I wondered if they were discussing the evening more, like we had been, or if they were still celebrating.
My legs begged me to cross the imaginary line that no longer existed and knock on their front door for the first time in my life, but my mind stopped me. It was too tired for more words or feelings tonight, and so I trudged toward my tiny bungalow instead, a hot shower and my bed not only calling my name, but also screaming it.
Poor Jeanine had been texting me all night, threatening my life if I didn’t at least give her a thumbs-up or down emoji. She informed me that she couldn’t sleep until she knew something, ANYTHING—she had written in all caps.
I sent her a quick response with a thumbs-up to calm her nerves and told her I’d fill her in on everything tomorrow. My best friend was going to lose her mind over what had happened here tonight. And that would make two of us.
SPREADING RUMORS
James
My parents and I stood around our butcher block table, each of us nursing the last bit of wine in our respective glasses as I checked my phone for at least the hundredth time since we’d gotten back from the La Bellas’. I wondered when and if Julia was ever going to text me like I’d asked. My mother teased me after the tenth time she caught me checking, and I had nothing to say for myself, except that I was a determined man who was currently obsessed with all things Julia La Bella. I had it bad.
“She’ll call you,” she tried to reassure me, but I wasn’t convinced.
“I asked her to text when she got home. What if her dad changed his mind and told her to stay away from me again? He wouldn’t do that, right?” I glanced between my parents, who looked more relaxed than I’d ever seen them before, their shoulders no longer tense, their faces no longer creased with worry lines.
My dad spoke up, “He won’t change his mind. He can’t. Not now that he knows the truth. And I saw the weight lift off of his body the same way it lifted from mine. Can’t imagine he wants to go back to carrying it again. I sure as hell don’t.” He blew out a relieved breath, and it shocked me how much stress we’d all been forced to live with without truly realizing the physical effects.
I almost asked my parents if they were okay with the idea of Julia and me being together, but I didn’t. Their blessing would make things easier, but I honestly didn’t give a shit anymore. Nothing and no one was going to stop me from getting the girl. Not this time. Not ever again. And I decided that if Julia didn’t send me a text within the next thirty minutes, I’d go over to her house and punish her just like I’d promised.
Hell, maybe that was exactly what she wanted. I wouldn’t put it past my girl to push my buttons for fun. No sooner were the thoughts crossing my mind than my phone vibrated across the table, alerting everyone to the fact that I had a text message. I reached for it like it was a fire I needed to put out, a huge smile plastering itself on my face without my consent as soon as I noticed the sender’s name on the screen. It was the name I’d had for her in my phone since we were teenagers even though I’d only seen it come across my screen once before—Julia LBR.
Here’s your text, bossy.
I laughed out loud when I read her message, and my parents both looked at me with the dopiest expressions on their faces.
“What?” I tried to sound tough, but it was really hard to sound like a badass when you sported a giant smile you couldn’t control.
“Go get the damn girl already,” my dad encouraged, and he didn’t need to tell me twice.
I bolted out the front door and jogged over to Julia’s place, uninvited. I figured I’d beg for forgiveness from between her thighs if I had to, but I had a feeling she wouldn’t be too pissed at me for showing up, unannounced.
Knocking on her door when all I wanted to do was kick it down and have my way with her took more restraint than I possessed in that moment. I stood there, my arms pinned on either side of the wood frame as I waited impatiently for it to open.
The second it did and I saw her surprised face, I reached for her like she was the only air I needed and crashed my lips against hers, throwing the door open in my wake and moving us both deeper inside. She opened easily, her tongue finding mine without hesitation, as our mutual lust filled the space between us. I reached for her ass, squeezing it, and she hopped up. When her legs wrapped around my waist, I almost died on the spot.
“God, this is so much better than fake hating you,” she breathed out, her lips still pressed against mine as her eyes fluttered between open and closed.
I lowered her feet to the floor and held on to the back of her neck to keep her close. The last thing I wanted was her getting away from me before I was ready.
I continued to lick her lips, teasing her with my tongue before diving back inside her hot mouth. We moved in unison, our kisses as easy and natural as the sun rising and setting each day. It was like we’d been doing it our whole lives. I knew it was because she had been made for me, her lips the exact replica of what mine craved.
“We’ve wasted so much time being apart when we should have always been together.”
She slightly pulled away, my hand dropping from her neck to let her, as her hazel eyes softened with my admission. “You really believe that about us?”
She moved backward to her couch and sat on the edge as my body instinctively followed hers. I stood between her open legs, her thighs pressing against my leg
s, holding me in place.
“What? That you never stood a chance with someone who wasn’t me? Hell yes. It’s the truth,” I answered, steadfast in my feelings. I meant it. I believed it. And nothing would have ever changed my mind about it.
“And what about you?” Her smile was a little wicked as she toyed with me, but I knew she needed to hear me say it out loud, the same way I needed to hear the same admission from her.
No matter how strong either of us were, our vulnerability for each other lay right below the surface, two land mines just waiting to explode.
“Any other woman would have just been my version of a poor man’s Julia. A second-place trophy. A mere replica because I couldn’t have the original. And, deep down, I would have always known it and fucking hated it.”
Her jaw slacked with her surprise. It seemed like I was always shocking her with my words, but it wasn’t like it was the first time I’d admitted to having feelings for her.
“You know, you might have said all these things to me years ago and saved us both a little time,” she answered like a smart-ass, her hands rubbing the sides of my legs as she looked up at me, her eyelashes batting.
“Uh, I tried to do that, remember? That time in the vineyard when I told you I wanted to be with you, and you smashed my heart into a million pieces,” I said, bringing up one of the most painful memories of my young adult life.
Her eyebrows pulled together, and she looked distraught. “What are you talking about?”
I took a step back to not only break our physical contact, but to also look at her from a distance instead of so up close. “Um, that night in the vineyard. In high school?” I said it like a question because her confused expression hadn’t lessened.
“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” she said, her full lips pursing like she’d eaten something rotten.
“You’re joking, right? Messing with me?” I cocked a lopsided grin, but she shook her head.
“No. James, I honestly don’t know what you’re talking about. What night in the vineyard? Was this before or after you started that rumor?”
“You really don’t remember?” I asked as the pieces started to fall into place.
She hadn’t treated me any differently after that night, like I’d mistakenly thought. She didn’t even remember it. Hell, my ego had been so damaged that I’d read into everything she didn’t say in ways she never meant.
“Tell me, what happened?”
“It was the night you went out to drink all the wine. You were alone. Except for the four bottles by your side,” I started to explain as her expression shifted, her eyebrows shooting up and her hand covering her mouth.
“Oh my God. You were there. I remember now that you showed up, and I was so pissed about you being there. But I don’t remember anything after that.”
I crossed the divide I’d created, moving my body back in between hers, and relaxed the second her hands found my sides again and started moving up and down.
“I spilled my heart to you that night. Told you that I had feelings for you and that I wanted to be with you. You told me that I didn’t know what feelings were and that you’d never want to be with me. I even asked you again just to make sure. You were pretty adamant about your disgust for me.”
“James”—she looked like someone had just punched her in the heart—“I woke up in the vineyard the next morning, and I could barely remember going out there in the first place. The empty wine bottles were scattered at my feet, and I threw up the second I tried to stand. That night has always been a complete blur to me.”
“This whole time, I thought you remembered.”
“Is that why you started the rumor?”
I shook my head because that hadn’t been why at all. “You broke my heart that night, but the rumor was an accident,” I started to explain.
She scoffed, “How could what you said be an accident? You told everyone I’d slept with you!”
“Because I was in love with you, Julia. Why did you think I’d started it?” Clearing the air and healing old wounds was cathartic even if it hurt to relive it in the moment.
Her hands moved from the sides of my legs to my waist, and I tried to focus on her words and not the touch of her fingertips sending sensations throughout my entire body.
“I thought you were trying to ruin my life. Like hating me wasn’t enough for you, and you had to take it one step further.”
“I never hated you.”
“I know that now, but I didn’t then.” She swatted at me before faking a pout.
The rumor really hadn’t been intentional on my part even though I’d been so bitter about her rejection that it probably looked that way from her perspective. Or at least, it would have, if she had remembered rejecting me in the first place.
“I overheard a few of my basketball teammates talking about you in the locker room one afternoon after practice, and I lost my shit,” I started to tell her the story as my mind flashed back.
“Hey, Russo. What do you think Julia would say if I asked her out?” my teammate Todd Lestare shouted.
I slung a towel around my shoulder as I opened my locker. “I have no idea. Why do you want to? She’s not even remotely your type,” I said, hoping he would take offense and back the hell off.
Todd usually liked girls who were a little less difficult, and the thought of him anywhere near Julia made my skin crawl.
“Maybe it’s time to branch out,” he said.
My hands balled into fists at my sides. “Running out of options?” I practically growled.
He laughed like it was the most absurd question on the planet. “Yeah, right, Russo. I don’t run out of options. Is it wrong that I want to be the one who takes the La Bella princess’s virginity? Think of it as a merger,” he said through a sly grin.
It took everything in me not to sock him in the fucking jaw as another teammate gave him a high five. I wanted to high five his face. With a chair.
“Well, I hate to be the one to break it to you, but you’re too late for that title.” The words were out of my mouth before I could stop them.
Dane suddenly appeared at my side and whispered harshly, “What are you doing?”
“Just go with it.” I gave him a hard look, and he shook his head.
“No way! Who’d she give it up to?”
I shrugged my shoulders, not wanting to say the words out loud since they were a blatant lie, but knowing that I would if that was what it took to keep him away from her.
Thankfully, I didn’t have to answer.
Dane stepped up, answering for me, “Come on, Lestare. A gentleman never tells.”
“You? Dane?” Todd looked at him in disbelief. “No fucking way.”
“No, not me,” Dane shot him an incredulous look as he gave a slight nod in my direction.
“Who then?” Todd looked between the two of us. “Russo? My man!” he shouted before raising his hand in the air and waiting for me to slap it.
I begrudgingly obliged, but that single gesture confirmed his guess and solidified the lie. It might be a shit thing to do, but I was convinced that I was doing the right thing by her. Todd Lestare would have taken something precious from her that he couldn’t give back, and he would have made sure everyone in town knew it’d happened. He would have humiliated her. And I had no idea I was about to do the same thing.
“But, wait, I thought you two hated each other?” another player asked.
“Yeah, well, sometimes, the hate makes it better,” I said, adding to the lie.
“Care if I ask her out? Take her for a spin?” Todd asked like Julia was a fucking car everyone was entitled to drive.
“Like hell,” I bit out in response before circling to face all of my teammates, who were suddenly all ears. “None of you assholes had better touch her or even think about asking her out. You hear me? She’s off-limits. If I hear otherwise, we’ll have a big fucking problem.”
“Never pegged you for the jealous type, Russo,” Todd
added before placing a hand on my shoulder.
I tossed it off. “Stay away from her.”
Her eyes were as wide as saucers. “Todd? Oh my God. No wonder you hated that I’d agreed to go to dinner with him!”
“I would have hated it anyway, but it made it worse that it was him of all people.” I swallowed the anger rising in my throat as I reminded myself that I’d gotten the girl.
I got the girl.
I got the girl.
“I can’t believe that’s how it started. I had no idea, and of course, I just assumed the worst,” she said with a shrug. “You know, that you were a total lying asshole who wanted to ruin me for all others.”
I felt a little stupid and immature, but I also knew that I’d do it all over again if I had to. “It killed me the day you told me to take it back. I knew that I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t bear the thought of anyone on my team touching you, let alone taking the one thing I thought I’d never get to have.”
“Surprise, Russo, you’ve had it.” She laughed and waved an arm in the air like a game show hostess. “And, just for the record, I was never interested in Todd Lestare.”
I swallowed hard. “Good. Because the thought of you with him makes me want to stab my own eyes out, so I don’t have to see it in my head.”
“Little dramatic, don’t you think?” she asked through a soft giggle, but I could tell she was enjoying the jealous side of me.
I wasn’t proud of it, but sometimes, feelings weren’t in our control. And, when it came to Julia La Bella, my resolve was only so strong, my emotions only so in check.
“Not when it comes to you. Not when it comes to us.”
“There’s an us now? Is this official?”
“There’s always been an us, Julia. You were just too stubborn or scared to admit it. Tell me you’ve always wanted me.”
She stayed quiet, purely to torture me I was sure.
“Julia,” I ground out, my knee moving to press against her core.
Her body writhed in response. “Fine. You know I have.”
“But I’ve never heard you say it.” My knee moved in small, torturous circles, causing her mouth to open and her tongue to peek out.
