Howard winked. “Nothing like the original.”
Ellie returned to the bedroom mirror and removed her head scarf. The chemo had taken all but a few wisps of white hair. Howard turned away, his throat tightening. He closed his eyes, trying to hold onto the image of the lively girl he first saw at the malt shop so many years ago.
Howard dabbed his eyes with his handkerchief and blew his nose. He inhaled deeply and released a shaky breath. Turning back he found Ellie wearing the brown wig, the ends curled under at the shoulders. In his mind’s eye his love looked just as she did on their first date.
Howard opened the car door for his wife as he had every time since their first date. “Madame …”
“Thank you, kind sir.” Ellie noticed the single red rose on the seat and clasped her hand to her chest. She brought the bloom to her nose, closed her eyes, and imbibed its scent. She smiled and gave her husband a kiss on the cheek. He took her by the hand and helped her into her seat.
Howard closed the door and shuffled around to the driver’s side and got behind the wheel. When he started the car the seatbelt chime complained. Ellie gave him the look.
“I know, I know. Don’t think I’ll ever get used to wearing a seatbelt.” Reluctantly, he buckled up.
Howard switched the radio from AM talk radio to an oldies music station. The perfect soundtrack for their date.
As they drove, Howard was struck anew how much the town had changed since their first date. The diner they used to frequent had a For Lease sign out front. The old bowling alley had been demolished and replaced by a strip mall populated with a cellular phone store, a dry cleaner, a sushi restaurant, and another place serving shawarma, whatever the hell that was.
Fruit and vegetable stands were replaced with coffee shops and fast-food restaurants. The woods Howard and his friends used to play in became a subdivision. Memory lane sure had changed.
“Remember when this all used to be farmland?” Ellie asked, gazing out the window.
“I remember old man Tillman chasing me and my buddies out of his watermelon patch with his shotgun! Marty got a butt full of rock salt. Never seen him run so fast!” Howard laughed. “Howled like a cat in heat!”
Ellie laughed too but it degenerated into another coughing fit. Howard dug in his pocket for his handkerchief, but it was hard to retrieve while sitting. He wrestled with his pocket when a horn blared. Howard cranked the wheel, steering back into his own lane.
“Howard!” Ellie shouted breathlessly, pointing as they barreled toward a parked car.
He had overcorrected. The parked car seemingly came out of nowhere. Ellie put her hands in front of her face, bracing for the collision.
Howard swerved and barely avoided sideswiping the parked car.
The light ahead turned red.
He stomped on the brake and came to an abrupt stop, the seatbelt digging into his chest.
His heart pounded. Ellie continued hacking. He finally dug his handkerchief out of his pocket and handed it to his wife. The light changed and Howard pulled over at the next opportunity.
Ellie’s coughing slowed. She gasped for breath. Howard put his hand on her shoulder.
“Breathe, Ellie. Just try and relax.”
She closed her eyes and finally got her breathing under control.
“Are you okay?”
Ellie took a deep breath through her nose, inhaling from the oxygen tube. She nodded. “I’m fine.” She wiped her mouth and returned the handkerchief to her husband.
Howard took it from her shaking hand. Blood spotted the handkerchief.
“Do you need to go the hospital?”
“No, I’m fine, really. Just need to catch my breath.”
Howard’s heart sank. He wanted tonight to be perfect. Doddering old fool. He’d nearly gotten them killed. He glanced at the bloody handkerchief. “Maybe we should just head home.”
“No!” Ellie coughed again then pleaded with her eyes. “Tonight … is our night … Not the cancer’s.”
Howard took her hand and kissed it. She smiled. He wanted to say something but he feared his voice would crack. Instead he shifted into drive and held her hand all the way to the drive-in.
The blood-red sun settled atop one of the last remaining tree lines in the area. A slim crescent moon appeared amongst the amassing black clouds. It boded well for the drive-in movie screen. The darker the better.
Up ahead, the marquee sign flickered to life displaying tonight’s double feature.
THE GLOB—3D:
AND
THE THING FROM PLANET X
Ellie gasped. “It’s a creature feature!”
Howard grinned. “Just like on our first date.”
They drove up to the ticket booth and Howard handed the middle-aged woman in the window their tickets. The woman smiled and leaned over to see who Howard had with him.
“Are you sure you two are old enough to see these movies?” She gave Howard a wink.
“Just barely,” Howard said. “And I promise we don’t have any friends in the trunk.”
Ellie giggled and Howard put his hand on her leg.
The woman reached out the window. “Here’s your 3D glasses. And no funny business in there,” she said. “I’m gonna keep an eye on you two!”
Ellie giggled again and whispered, “Good luck once the windows get steamed up!”
Howard pulled into the drive-in lot and found a spot in the center, near the front. Just like on their first date. He prayed this wouldn’t be their last.
By the time Howard reached the concession stand his knees ached something terrible. Spotting the Restrooms sign, he decided to make a pit stop. With his enlarged prostate and arthritic knees, he should’ve parked closer to the concession stand than the screen.
Howard got in line at the concessions counter and ordered the same thing he did on their first date—two hotdogs with mustard (no onions), a large bucket of popcorn, and a large drink with two straws. His friend Josh said if you can get your date to drink from the same cup, then kissing was only a few more inches. And no onions in case it actually worked.
Wedging the popcorn bucket under his arm, Howard grabbed the cardboard food tray and headed back to the car, careful not to trip and fall on the uneven gravel lot. His balance wasn’t what it used to be.
Howard grinned as he passed some teenager’s hand-me-down Ford with its windows already fogged up. Back in his day, the windows didn’t get steamed until the second feature.
Squeals came from the playground as children climbed and ran and chased each other without a care in the world. Pleasant memories flooded back of his and Ellie’s children climbing on giant fiberglass elephants, hippopotamuses, and giraffes on this very same playground.
Howard glanced around, disoriented. Why couldn’t he find his car? He meandered from row to row. So many cars. Ah, finally. Howard walked up to the car and a strange face scowled back at him. He jumped back, spilling some of the popcorn.
“Sorry!”
Damn newer cars all look alike. Howard wandered for several minutes before finally spotting his car.
Approaching the passenger-side door, Howard held the food next to the window to get his wife’s attention but her eyes were closed. He fumbled the food tray and popcorn bucket in an attempt to rap on the window but his arms were too full and he feared he’d dump their entire dinner on the ground. He sighed and shuffled around to the driver’s side and set the food on the hood.
As he reached for the door handle a spike of fear pierced his chest. No. Not today. Not now. God, please, not yet!
Howard jerked open the car door and dropped into the seat with a grunt. Her eyes were still closed. She looked … peaceful.
Howard reached for her, his hand trembling. Then stopped. He wanted to know—needed to know—but the answer terrified him. Taking a deep breath he steadied himself and felt her wrist. Her arm felt cold.
Wait, was that a faint pulse? Or just wishful thinking?
“Ellie?” He coul
d barely speak her name.
She didn’t respond.
Howard’s heart beat hard enough for both of them. He held his shaking hand in front of her slack mouth to feel for respiration. Her breathing was either too shallow or …
His throat clenched. Again, he called her name but nothing came out but a choked whisper. His eyes blurred.
Mustering every ounce of courage he had, he checked her carotid pulse.
Ellie’s eyes sprung open and she gasped, startling Howard.
“What? Where?” Her chest heaved as she tried to get her breath under control.
“It’s okay, Ellie. I’m here.”
She glanced around, confused.
“I’m right here, honey.”
Seeing Howard, her breathing slowed. She placed her hand on Howard’s cheek and smiled.
Ellie’s smile faded. She looked confused. “Weren’t you going to get us something to eat?”
“I did but I thought you were …” Dead? Howard shook the horrible notion from his head. “… asleep. And I didn’t want to wake you.”
Ellie looked around confused. “Then where is it?”
“I left it on the hood.”
Ellie raised an eyebrow.
“To keep it warm. Until you woke up.” Howard chuckled nervously. “I’ll go get it.”
Storm clouds obscured the moon. Lightning flashed somewhere in the distance. A moment later a low rumble of thunder resonated, setting the mood for the creature feature.
A test pattern flashed on the drive-in screen and counted down from five to one before an animated band of popcorn, soda, and candy danced across the screen singing, “Let’s all go to the lobby.”
Ellie laughed and slapped Howard’s leg. “Boy, does that bring back memories!”
“Do you want me to go get you anything else?”
Ellie gazed at Howard and smiled. “I have everything I need right here.”
Howard put his arm around his wife and pulled her close. She felt so small. So fragile. He wanted to squeeze her but he feared she might break.
The credits rolled and a message displayed on the screen cuing them to don their 3D Glasses. It took some effort to get them to fit over their bifocals but they managed just in time to see the title card zoom at them …
THE GLOB! … In 3D!
Thunder rumbled, as if on cue.
The movie opened at the La Brea Tar Pits in Hancock Park. Oil derricks pumped away with the Santa Monica Mountains in the distance.
An archaeology professor and a handful of his students clad in khaki shorts and pith helmets chipped away at the asphalt walls of an excavation pit. A female student dislodged a saber-toothed cat fang and cried out with excitement. Her fellow students gathered around as the professor verified her discovery.
Their excitement turned to screams when the earth began to rumble and shake. The archaeology students stumbled, fighting to stay on their feet but the earthquake was too violent.
The ladder fell into the pit, preventing their escape. A fissure split open the ground releasing plumes of steam. One of the students cried out as he fell into the chasm up to his armpits.
When the shaking subsided, the students rushed to help the young man hanging on for dear life over the steaming crevasse.
Suddenly, a viscous, black liquid oozed out of the hole.
Two students each grabbed an arm and dragged him from the bubbling sludge as his bottom half melted away. They quickly dropped him and backed away as The Glob continued to ooze out of the fissure, its oily black surface steaming as it engulfed the student’s remains.
One of the female students screamed and fainted.
Panicking, the others scrambled to climb out of the excavation pit but there was nowhere to run. The pit’s walls were too steep to climb out.
The gelatinous black substance spread across the pit floor, miring them down in its tarry morass. The bare legs of those it trapped blistered and popped as The Glob dissolved their flesh down to the bone. Their tortured cries were mercifully silenced as the molten sludge absorbed the rest of their bodies.
The professor managed to raise the ladder. But before he could climb out of the pit, the amorphous creature shot out a black tendril that lassoed his leg and pulled him down into the oily quagmire.
The Glob oozed up the ladder, freeing itself from its earthly confines, seeking to satiate its unquenchable appetite.
Ellie watched the scary parts through splayed fingers as she and Howard crunched their popcorn, losing themselves in good old-fashioned, B-movie nostalgia. The closest thing to heaven on earth.
Lightning flashed above the drive-in, quickly followed by a powerful thunderclap. The storm drew closer. Lightning continued to spider-web across the ominous purple sky. Howard had never seen an electrical storm quite like this. The speaker hanging from his window crackled with static each time lightning lit up the sky.
He hugged Ellie tight, knowing how fearful she got during thunderstorms, especially since they were surrounded by metal.
On the screen The Glob oozed down Main Street, consuming everything in its path—cars, lampposts, and people too slow to outrun it. The more it consumed, the bigger it got. Downtown was in complete chaos.
Police blocked off Main Street with their cruisers. The Glob rushed toward the barricade. The officers opened fire but the creature absorbed their attack without slowing. The Glob surged like an ocean wave, swelling high above the squad cars. The crowd gasped and screamed as it crested above them.
Suddenly a bolt of lightning struck the drive-in theater screen. Electricity arced and popped across the screen sending showers of sparks raining down. Electricity surged through The Glob as a wave of black sludge poured out of the screen and into the drive-in.
Howard couldn’t believe his eyes. It must be a 3D optical illusion. He took off his 3D glasses and looked again.
Molten sludge continued to spill out of the screen. How was this possible?
“Ellie, do you see what I’m seeing?”
Flashes of lightning provided snapshots of The Glob amassing and oozing toward the drive-in patrons’ cars. Brake lights flared as others discovered the approaching threat. Muffled screams erupted from the other cars. A handful of patrons got out of their vehicles to investigate.
A terrified mother ran toward the playground, yelling for her kids. The children continued to climb on the equipment, oblivious to the imminent danger behind them. Their mother frantically waved them toward her, but her children didn’t want to stop playing.
The Glob swelled as it reached the playground.
Finally reacting to their mother pointing behind them and the rising chorus of screams, the children glanced back, but it was too late. A wave of black sludge engulfed the playground set along with the screaming children. Their mother dropped to her knees and released a tortured wail.
Headlights flared and cars sped in reverse, spraying gravel and ripping the speaker wires from their posts. Cars crashed into each other, horns honked, people screamed.
The creature continued to advance.
As the Glob reached them, drivers abandoned their vehicles and ran for the exits. Some weren’t as lucky. The dark, hungry mass engulfed their cars, dissolving metal, glass, vinyl, and any flesh trapped inside.
Howard couldn’t believe his eyes. He finally snapped out of his shock and slid behind the wheel. As he reached for the keys in the ignition, Ellie leaned on his shoulder.
He said, “Don’t worry, sweetheart. I’ll get us out of here.”
Starting the car, he reached for the column shifter to put the vehicle in reverse. Ellie slumped forward, her head thumping into the dash.
Howard stiffened. His heart pounded. Because he knew.
He gently leaned Ellie back. Her head lolled.
Howard turned off the ignition, sat back, and held Ellie tight as the insatiable black mass rolled toward them, consuming everything in its path.
B.D. Prince was born in Michigan, a dark fiction and comedy
writer who credits these proclivities to growing up near a cemetery and being endowed with a freakishly long funny bone. He ultimately moved to California to pursue screenwriting and get a tan. Prince has written everything from screenplays to one-liners for Joan Rivers. After completing several screenplays and publishing numerous short stories, Prince is currently working on a full-length horror novel and developing a project for television.
Welcome to the Underhill Cinema
Fran Wilde
Welcome to the Underhill Cinema
11/1/19 1:05 pm—Cambell Stevens: 5 pm, Underhill Cinema, meet me there?
11/1/19 1:08 pm—Virginia Bell: I love that place. It’s a mess. We going in?
11/1/19 1:09 pm—Cambell Stevens: You know it. Wear something nice? For the fans.
Cambell stared down the length of broken sidewalk beside the chain link fence and NO TRESPASSING signs outside The Underhill before he ducked beneath the fallen marquee. The rent-a-cop was watching Magnum-PI on his phone again, same as when Cambell did recon on the old theater the day before.
He was early, sure, but Ginny was usually earlier. For this episode of Ghost Town Caving, Cambell needed the extra time to set up lights and perch the drone cams just right without spoiling the surprise.
He cleared the plywood boards beyond the marquee, though it was a tight squeeze. Dust streaked his pawn-shop tuxedo jacket, and he had to use his GTC gear bag—with the glow-in-the-dark logo that Ginny had designed—to part the thick cobwebs. The drone rode his shoulder like a simplified crow, recording everything from the fading light to the pop of the webs as they parted.
He and Ginny had spent weeks researching the building for their season finale. When Ginny had gotten the call from Hollywood, they’d had to move the episode up. Rented a cheap car out of Portland and drove up US 5 until they found the place. Planned two days for recon and filming together, then she’d take the train down the coast to L.A.
Monsters, Movies & Mayhem Page 33
