One of the guards leaves as Dad answers.
“Bay,” he says. “We heard from Rosemary, but we don’t know all of what happened.”
“Dad.”
“I’m here too,” Mom says.
I wince. She’s got to be so upset with me. I’ve always been Dad’s favorite. He’s a dark fae himself, but I really crossed the line with the stunts I pulled this time around.
"We won't stand for this," Mom says. "I'm sure that whatever this is, it's nonsense. You don't deserve to be locked away, and for what? Humans at least have trials. Why don't we?"
“Mom, you don’t need to worry about me. I’ll be fine.”
“What exactly happened?” Dad asks.
“I got mixed up with the wrong crowd,” I mumble.
“If you’re taking the fall for other fairies—” Mom starts.
“That’s not it, Mom.”
She grunts. I’m sure she didn’t like that I interrupted her. Rosemary’s always been Mom’s favorite, even though I’m sure Rosemary doesn’t even realize that. Mom’s tough on us both.
“Didn’t I always say you have issues?” Dad asks.
I wince. He said that before, but it had always been a joke. Now, he actually seems to mean it, and it hurts.
“Yeah, but they all stem from you, remember, Daddy Dearest?”
“You have no idea,” he mumbles.
I lift my eyebrows, suddenly wishing he and I were the only ones talking. Had he ever been sent here? He’s a good and light enough fae now compared to what he might have been. My wings used to be as clear as Mom’s and Bay’s, but now, they’re as dark as Dad’s.
“Who all is in this wrong crowd?” Mom presses.
“Not really a crowd, Mom. Just one guy.”
“What’s the fairy’s name?”
I wince. “Not a fairy.”
There’s silence on the other end.
“Never mind that,” Mom says firmly. “We promise to fight for you, dear, don’t we? Rosemary told us that you didn’t take part in the killing, but we didn’t need to be told that.”
I appreciate her wiliness, her belief, but it’s misguided.
“I’m not guilty of that,” I say heavily.
“You will not stop fighting this, do you hear me?” Mom asks sharply.
“Why don’t you go and make some tea?” Dad suggests.
“I do not need calming tea right now!” Mom shouts.
“Mom?”
“Yes, dear?”
“Make some tea.”
Mom grumbles and mutters, but then I can’t hear her anymore.
“It’s just you and me,” Dad says.
“She’ll be able to overhear—”
“My end only.”
I hesitate.
“You got mixed up with a demon, didn’t you?” Dad asks.
“Maybe.”
“You can tell me.”
“You’ll hate me.”
“That’s not possible,” Dad murmurs.
“You’ll judge me.”
“For what? For being my daughter? Because you and I both know that life doesn’t always turn out the way we want it too.”
“I realize that.”
“You made mistakes.”
“More than a few,” I admit, “but my life turned out this way because of my actions. I don’t want Mom to waste her time, to waste her life, trying to get me out. Maybe I deserve to be in here.”
“Bay, I find that hard to believe.”
“I’ve done wrong, Dad. No joking around. I did things that would make your skin crawl.”
“There’s nothing you could’ve done that would make me hate you.”
“Oh, yeah?” For some reason, I’m all fired up.
A glance over my shoulder reveals that the guard in the room has stepped out, and I clear my throat.
“Dad, I drank blood from a human and almost killed the guy.”
“Ah, so that incident with Mark Fox was you.”
“Wait, how did you know about that?”
“Let’s just say that my job is involved in ensuring that we stay out of the noise from both the fairy courts and from the humans. Any time there’s an incident, I need to make sure that it can’t be traced back to fairies.”
“How did anyone even know a fairy had been involved?” I wonder aloud.
“When other fairies have done the same as you,” he murmurs. “I never thought… Your mom and I hoped that by not sharing my past with you girls meant you wouldn’t be tempted to repeat it, but I failed you.”
“Wait. Are you saying what I think you’re saying? You…” I glance over my shoulder and drop my voice. “You drank blood too?”
“I did.”
My heart pounds in my chest. “Dad, I…”
“It’s dangerous and addicting. It causes our magic to become amplified because our magic draws on nature itself. You can take too much, though, and it can cause corruption. You need to resist as much as possible. Any urges—”
“I wouldn’t say I have any.”
“Thank the moon for that,” he murmurs.
“Dad, I’m sorry. I knew I was getting in too deep, but…”
“You don’t have to apologize. If anything, I should be apologizing to you. I failed you.”
“No, you didn’t.”
“You didn’t feel like you could talk to me. If that’s not a failure, then I don’t know what is.”
I swallow hard. “Dad…” Tears prickle my eyes, and I angrily blink them away. I am not the kind of fairy who cries.
“What is it, Bay?” he asks.
The kindness in his voice angers me. I don’t deserve compassion. He knows what I’ve done.
Well, some of it.
“I thought I loved Zoth. I was blind. Stupid, so very stupid! But I was blind with Spring and Thistle too. I… I don’t trust my own judgment.”
"You need illumination more than ever."
I wince. “Zoth didn’t want me to have that.”
“And that’s why he killed the professor,” Dad says evenly. “It’s all coming together now.”
I nod miserably.
“Well, then. Zoth feared that if you learned and discovered who you truly are, that he would lose you. That says something, Bay. That says a lot about who you truly are. Don’t forget what Professor Luna did get to teach you before her untimely death.”
“Dad?”
“Yes?”
“You didn’t fail me. I failed. I was lured into darkness, but I dove in head first. No one is to blame but me. I mean, Dad… I sold fairy dust on campus. I’ve done plenty of things I shouldn’t have even before I met Zoth. I can’t turn back the clock, but I can admit to what I did. I don’t know if I regret everything I did, but I do have some regrets.”
“That’s what you need to change,” Dad says simply. “Work on having no regrets. Your choices matter. Your decisions matter, but what matters most is if you can live with yourself, if you can live with the consequences. You can get through this.”
“I will. I know I will.” I bite my lower lip. “I just don’t know who the fairy will be who finally flies out of this joint.”
“Don’t worry about that fairy yet. Just concentrate on the here and now.”
“Are you done talking yet?” a guard calls.
“Just a minute,” I call without turning around. I’ve been so focused on talking to my parents that I didn’t even take much stock of the room. Dark stone walls, no chairs, not even a table. The phone’s attached to the wall.
It seems like I’m in a cell already.
“You better go,” Dad says. “I love you, Bay. I probably haven’t told you that enough over the years.”
“I love you too, Dad.”
I hang up and close my eyes. I just wish I could believe that he loved me, and even more so, I wish that I could love myself.
8
Who am I? I feel like I don’t even know anymore. Normally, I’m so carefree, frivolous, happy. Not anymore.
Zoth took that from me.
Or, rather, I allowed him too. I pretended that his affection was good enough for me, and I pretended to be happy. At times, I wasn’t pretending with him, and that’s the problem. Everything became a huge, convoluted mess in my mind, and now, I’m a wreck who’s about to be imprisoned.
Well, I’m going to find myself despite the bars, and I’m going to be carefree and happy again if that’s what I want to be.
That settled, I turn around. The guard who flies into the room isn’t one of the guards from earlier. He has dark red hair and piercing green eyes. The whites of his eyes are tinged blue, making him look more magical than most fairies.
“Bay?” he asks.
“Yes.”
“I’m Drake Figbite. Will you come with me?”
“You’re going to take me to my cell?” I ask.
“Yes.”
“I hope you’ll follow me inside,” I purr.
Drake just shakes his head. “You aren’t the first to flirt with me.”
“Oh, I don’t doubt that,” I murmur. “You’re a delicious hunk of a fairy.”
I'm not lying either. It doesn't hurt any that his uniform looks like it's painted on. His muscles bulge that much. A lot of fairies are on the leaner side, but not Drake.
“You need to come along.” He cocks his head toward the door.
Instead of touching me like the others have, he just flies along, expecting me to follow, and I do, pretending to be a good little fairy, but I linger behind him, so I can watch his ass. It's plump, the kind of ass you want to grab and slap.
Clearly, I didn’t love Zoth if I’m already eyeing another fairy in a sexual way, but I’ve always been a looker. Looking never hurt anyone. It’s acting on impulses that can get you in trouble, and honestly, all I want to do right now is look. I am not about to touch, kiss, or do anything else with any guy right now. That’s the last thing I need. If I start to get that itch, I’ll just scratch it myself. Sex fucked up my life, and I need to get my head on straight.
“In here,” Drake directs, pointing to a room down the hall from the phone room.
I wink at Drake as I fly by him. There’s a desk in here, covered with papers and other objects. No candles, no light source. There’s a faint glow from the walls, though, and that’s the only illumination in the place. I wonder if that’s the case for the entire prison.
“Sit if you please,” Drake says, gesturing to the chairs along the side wall.
“And if I don’t please?” I ask.
He shrugs, not even bothering to look at me. “You can do as you like.”
I narrow my eyes at him. “That’s not the point of this place, now, is it?”
“For the second, you aren’t yet a prisoner. Not until you’ve finished being processed.”
“And what does processing entail?”
“We’ll commence once you sit.”
“So if I never sit…” I wink even though he’s still not looking at me.
“You can sit right now,” he says firmly, “or I’ll make you sit.”
I exhale deeply and comply, but I definitely don’t sit like a lady. My legs are spread wide apart, and he can see that I’m not wearing any panties.
He finally turns to me, notices my lack of panties, rolls his eyes, and proceeds to grab my hand. With practiced ease, he rolls my fingers in ink and takes my fingerprints. It's more than just my fingerprints, though. It also allows for a magical trace. Any magic I've done recently, he'll be able to track down with ease now.
“Easy peasy,” I say.
"That is the easy part, yes," he grunts. "Now this, this is a bit… rougher."
He returns to the desk and uncovers a spiral, torturing-looking device, and I swallow hard.
“That’ll strip me of my magic, won’t it?” I ask, my throat dry.
“Not exactly. It’ll sever the bond between your person and nature.”
"We draw our magic from nature, so it's the same diff," I snap.
“Yes.”
“Can it be reversed?”
“Of course. If you are to ever leave this place, it will be reversed first, of course.”
“If I’m to leave this place?” I cross my arms as best as my cuffs will allow.
“Yes. Not everyone who is locked away will be released.”
“But I will be.”
“That is not up to me to decide. The warden will.”
“Will I meet him?”
“Who?”
“The warden.”
Drake’s eyes settle on me, and I feel as if he’s seeing me for the first time. “Nebulo Bramble is busy right now,” he murmurs.
“Does he know about why I’m here?”
“I’m sure he’ll be brought abreast of your… activities.”
“I need to talk to him.”
“Trust me. It’s actually a very good thing that he can’t see to you personally.”
I shiver. There’s a clear warning in his words. The warden is like a king, and I’ve always hated fairy kings. That’s why I like to be a free fairy.
Only I'm not free anymore.
A caged bird shouldn’t sing, shouldn’t bother to fly.
But they do.
And I’m going to too.
“What are you waiting for?” I beam at Drake. “Go ahead and strip me of my magic.”
“It’s not a pleasant experience,” he warns.
“Have you ever had it done to you?”
“Of course not.”
“Then you don’t know about the experience. I’m sure it’ll be fine.”
He eyes me curiously, a bit of skepticism in the slight frown curling his lips downward. He doesn’t believe me, but fairies can’t lie, and I wink.
“You’re a bit crazy, aren’t you?” he murmurs.
“Normal’s overrated, don’t you think?”
“Depends on the definition of normal.”
He places the device against my temple. A slight touch, and I feel as if my soul is on fire, that it’s burning away. I let out a hiss, and then the burning sensation leaves me, but I’m left with a feeling of isolation that I’ve never felt before.
The cuffs alone had dampened my magic, but it hadn’t been stripped away. It lingered yet, mostly out of reach.
Now, it’s gone.
My breathing’s hitched, and the guard eyes me carefully.
“What?” I snap.
“You took that better than most.”
“Ah, so I can handle the pain, the humiliation, the fucking despair better than most, can I?” I sneer.
“Then again, maybe not.”
I can’t help it. I laugh a bit, shake my head, and sigh. “This is cruel and unusual punishment.”
“I know.”
The words are so simple, but they humanize the guard, and I look at him again. He’s a hot guard, and he has a heart.
He must not have been working here long, then, because dealing with traumatized dangerous fairy prisoners all day cannot be a fun task at all.
“What’s next?” I ask. “Time for me to be taken to my cell?”
“No, actually.” Drake grimaces. “I really fucking hate this part.”
He mumbles the last to himself, but I straighten and even stand up.
“What do you have to do?”
“It’s warden’s orders, and I can’t disobey them.”
I snort. “Why would you disobey them? I’m just another prisoner.”
“We’re all prisoners to our mortal shells,” he says.
“Then I’m a two-timed prisoner,” I grumble.
“Yes, yes. I was trying to relate to you, you know.”
"I do know, and I also recognize that you're trying to do that, so I won't hate you for what's about to come. What is it?"
“Are you worried?”
“No.”
“You should be.”
His soft tone cuts away at me, and I scowl, wanting to push him away, not wanting him to get too close, but al
ready, I can feel it. I need someone to be my friend. I've always had more friends than I've known what to do with. Girls want to either be my friend or hate me, and guys all want to fuck me. I was told by a much older fairy when I was just thirteen what he wanted to do with me. I just laughed and used vines to tie him up before flying away.
I was kissed by a boy that I liked a week later.
I lost my virginity when I was fourteen.
I wouldn’t say that I use people. No. I just liked to form connections, and the best way to form a connection with a guy is through sex.
Honestly, I’ve always wondered if I would be happy long-term with only one partner. I’ve never told anyone that before, though I might have hinted at the idea with Rosemary some, just to tease her. I still remember how wide her eyes got when I talked to her about anal. She’s so light at times!
“What is it?” I ask Drake.
“I’ll just do it.”
“No,” I beg, touching his wrist. “Tell me. I want to be prepared.”
“I have to drug you.”
I stiffen. “What will it do?”
“Make you agreeable.”
“I’ll listen to suggestions,” I say bitterly.
He nods. “Yes, but it doesn’t last long. Just until you’re in your cell.”
“Good.” I swallow hard. “Ah, are prisoners drugged more often than that?”
“The warden leaves it up to the guards, at our discretion. Most don’t tend to, but then again, most of the inmates learn very early on not to mess with us.”
“You don’t seem so bad,” I murmur.
“Maybe that’s just because it’s your first time, first day.”
I stare into his piercing eyes. He’s not bluffing. He has an edge to him that both frightens and thrills me.
“You aren’t entirely light, are you?” I whisper.
“None of us are.” He inhales. “Are you ready?”
“Are you?” I counter.
He runs a hand through his dark red hair and then picks up a vial from the desk. The stopper is actually a syringe, and he drugs me.
Immediately, I lose control of my body. I slump against him, and he catches me just before my head goes near his groin area. He drags me along toward my cell. I can't even move my head to see the other prisoners, and no one speaks. There's not a single peep. Considering how full this place is, that's a very unnerving sign.
Dark Fae Penitentiary: First Transgression Page 4
