by Lisa De Jong
Staley nods.
“On page four, there’s a clause on adultery that reads: ‘If any party steps outside the marriage, he or she forfeits his or her half of the marital property.’ If you turn to page seven, you’ll see Marley’s signature.” He looks at me with a jerky smile as if I should be proud he called me by my first name. “Marley Mason was caught cheating on Cole Mason in her office. She admitted to as much, which is a clear violation of the agreement.”
Staley looks over at me. “Is that true?”
“Yes.”
Cole’s lips curl up, but I get the satisfaction of knowing that the smirk is only temporary.
“Is Mr. Mason asking that the clause be carried out in its entirety or is he willing to negotiate the terms?” Staley asks, glancing between both sides of the table.
Davis smiles. “He would like for it to be carried out.”
“Marley, do you have anything you’d like to add?” Staley asks, turning his attention back to me. “It’s your turn, if you’d like to make an argument.”
“I do actually,” I say, pulling the stack of photos from my file. It may be thin, but it’s all I need. I lay them out one by one in front of Cole and his high-powered attorney.
Cole’s smile falls quickly, and his face pales.
Davis sits quietly, lips moving silently before words finally come out. “Where did these come from?”
I shrug. “I don’t think that matters. Every photo is time and date stamped, and the woman can be identified as Bridget Flannery. I did my own research and found out she’s a lawyer out of Chicago. I can’t say for sure when this started, but the two of them started working on a case together about eight months ago.” I pause for a second, sliding one particular picture forward. “This is probably my favorite. Cole called me on my birthday and said he couldn’t make it home because of some issues in the case. It appears the only issue he had was that he couldn’t wait until they got back to the hotel to put his hands all over her.”
“The dates and times on these photos have to be wrong!” Cole yells, scooting his chair back.
“If you want to argue about this, I have someone who I think would be more than happy to attest to when these were taken,” I say, glaring at him.
Cole covers his face with his hands as he leans back. He wanted to trap me so that he could have everything—the money, the business, and maybe even her—but his selfishness backfired when he chose River as his pawn. He should have just ended the marriage if he wasn’t happy with me. He’d have half. I would’ve been heartbroken, but we wouldn’t have had to go through all of this.
Staley quickly thumbs through them. I tried to make it easy for him by putting them in chronological order. “When do you claim Marley’s indiscretion first began?” he asks, glancing over at Cole’s side of the table. “I see when this started.”
Davis crosses his arms over his chest, glancing up at the boring white tiled ceiling. “Two weeks ago.” His client obviously didn’t mention any of this to him.
“Well, Marley, are you willing to negotiate?”
Watching Cole’s reaction is what I wanted the most. And my car, I want that too. Everything else I get from this is for her, the woman he victimized. “I’m willing to give Cole the house as long as he assumes the mortgage. If he’d rather sell it, I want half the profit. I’m willing to give him three months’ worth of living expenses from our joint accounts, which I think is more than generous since I’m not obligated to give him a penny. And I’m willing to sell Cole the law practice for the market value if he can come up with the funds to buy it. If not, I’ll sell it to someone who can.”
“If you don’t want the firm, why the hell don’t you just give it to me?” Cole yells, finally uncovering his face. I’ve never seen it so red.
“It’s mine. I can do whatever I want with it.”
“You’re fucking ridiculous!”
I smile. “I guess I just joined your club.”
He reminds me of a first-year lawyer who has just been handed his ass in the courtroom. Clueless. Speechless. His fingers smooth over his temples as he fixates his eyes on the tabletop. Davis leans in to whisper something in his ear. Cole glances up at me, but as soon as he sees me watching him, he looks back down. The room is so quiet I can practically hear him thinking.
“He can keep his Lexus, as long as he can cover the payment,” I add. After he takes out a business loan, inherits the house and car payments, his lifestyle is going to change. Can’t say I feel sorry for him.
“I’ll accept the terms,” Cole says quietly. “I want an independent business evaluation on the firm so I can work on how I’m funding it. And, I’d prefer to sell the house.”
Staley jots down a few notes. “Are you sure you don’t want to talk to an attorney about this before we sign off, Marley?”
I shake my head, feeling more at peace than I have in a while. “I think we’re good.”
“Okay,” he says, shaking his head. “I’ll draft this up and send you each a copy to sign. Cole, you’ll have seven days from which the valuation comes back to decide if you want the firm or not. From that point, you’ll have thirty days to come up with the funding necessary to complete the transaction. Marley, how would you like the sale of the house to be handled?”
“I’d rather not go back. I’ll choose the realtor. Cole can deal with getting the house prepped. I guess we can divide what’s in it after everything is said and done.”
Honestly, I don’t want much. I’d rather let go of anything that reminds me of him and this marriage anyway.
We wrap up a few more details, then Staley dismisses us. With the sadness now comes relief. Cole calls my name as I walk down the hall, but I ignore him and step outside. Some things are better left in the past. He’s one of them.
DIVORCE ENDS A PHASE IN YOUR LIFE, but it also leads to a chance for a better one. The paperwork hasn’t officially been signed, but the ink is only a formality.
Cole has called me over a dozen times since we left mediation yesterday. I’ve declined each one. With time, I might get to a place where I can let him speak his piece, but right now, I need space. In a couple months, I’ll be free of Cole for good. Everything will be settled, and we can move on with our lives.
As I walk into the bar to meet the girls for wine night, I feel as if I don’t belong. Like I might be a stranger to them because my life has changed so much, or because it’s so different from theirs.
Lucia is the first to greet me, as always. “There’s our girl. We’ve missed you the last couple weeks.”
“And we hear you have a lot to talk about,” Jenna pipes in.
I take a seat between Lucia and Becca. I can’t help but notice the glass of lemon water that sits in front of Becca. At first, I feel bad for her since she can’t enjoy her usual glass of Moscato, but then I think of how lucky she is to have a baby growing inside her. The sadness I’ve been doing such a good job of hiding begins to surface. I’m a thirty-three year old soon-to-be divorcee. Falling in love again is the scariest thing to me right now. That fear is going to slowly diminish my chance of making my dreams of having a baby come true.
“Marley,” Becca says, waving her hand in front of me.
Slowly, I slip back to reality. “Sorry. It’s been a rough couple days.”
“Do you want to talk about it?” Robyn asks from across the table. “You don’t have to if you don’t want to.”
I tap my fingers on the table, looking around for our waitress.
Lucia’s hand covers mine as she uses the other to reach across the table for a bottle of pinot noir—my favorite. “We got you covered.” She can’t pour fast enough.
I sip, relishing in the delicate, fresh taste. If I’m lucky, by the end of the night it will take me to my happy place, at least until tomorrow morning when I wake up with a headache and an upset stomach. “Cole cheated on me for at least a couple months.”
As I glance around the table, no one seems surprised. “What?” I ask
, before taking another sip.
“Cole has always had a weird aura surrounding him. I hate to say it, but I don’t think that surprises any of us,” Lucia says, gaining collective nods from around the table.
“Well, someone could have said something to me!”
“What were we supposed to say?” Jenna asks. “Hey, Marley, we think your husband is a bit off. Maybe you should reconsider your relationship. I mean, if we thought he was actually cheating on you, we would have told you.”
They’re right. I keep most of the thoughts I have of their husbands to myself. It’s not really my place.
“I get it,” I say, polishing off the last of my glass. Lucia fills it back up immediately. “He paid the guy I slept with so he could catch me in the act. He wanted everything.”
“Oh my God,” Becca says, choking on her water. “How did you find out about his affair?”
“It’s a really long, complicated story, but it’s going to be okay. When we went through mediation yesterday, I got everything. Some of it I’ll sell back to him, but his plan backfired.”
“So what happened with the other guy?” Robyn asks.
River has consumed my thoughts even more than Cole lately. I’ve read his letter over and over the last couple days. He lied to me, but he kind of did it for all the right reasons. River isn’t easy to resist; no matter how much I tried, I couldn’t. If it was the same for him with me, I could understand why he did what he did. His letter made me feel less used, and more like we were two lost souls who crossed the same path at the same time. I can’t help but wonder what would be if we’d met under different circumstances. Even if he didn’t pursue me for genuine reasons, he may be the most genuine thing I’ve ever had.
“He’s gone,” I say. My eyes tear up.
“Why do you sound so upset? It sounds like that asshole deserves a little payback too,” Lucia points out.
I shrug. “He’s not a bad person. Like I said, there’s a lot more to it. I’d rather not talk about it right now.”
“I can’t decide if I’m relieved my life is more boring than yours or not,” Robyn admits.
We all laugh. It feels good.
“What?” Robyn asks.
Lucia is still laughing. “I just don’t understand why your husband wouldn’t want sex on Tuesdays when you come home drunk.”
Robyn’s mouth hangs open. “I’ve never thought about it that way. What do you think would happen if I tried to make a move on him when I got home tonight?”
This is the point where things start to get a little crazy.
“Will he be awake when you get home?” Jenna asks.
Robyn shakes her head.
Now, this is getting fun. “What does he sleep in?” I chirp in.
“Usually just a pair of pajama pants,” Robyn answers, her face reddening.
“So, here’s what you’re going to do: Crawl into bed naked and lay beside him then slip your hand in his pants and stroke him until his body catches up to what’s going on. That should wake him, and when it does, if he’s not ready to fuck, you seriously need to reconsider your marriage.” Lucia should write a book on this shit.
Robyn’s eyes are easily double in size. “You guys are insane.”
“Do you want to have fun or not?” Lucia asks, giving her the side eye.
“I’ll do it,” Robyn says, “but I’m going to need more of this.” She lifts her wine glass.
The rest of the evening is spent talking about every pointless subject that five women can conjure up. By the time I jump into a waiting cab to head home, I’m feeling pretty good. Life isn’t perfect, but little moments like the one I just had make it better.
I watch the city lights go by out my window until the cab pulls up in front of my building. I hand the driver some cash and step out into the warm, humid Miami air. It’s not until I look up from the sidewalk that I see him leaning against the front of the building in his jeans and a white T-shirt. My heart does the thing where it skips, and I have to take a deep breath to steady it.
“Hey,” he says, taking a couple steps toward me.
“What are you doing here?”
“I wanted to see how you’re doing. I figured you wouldn’t answer the phone if I called.”
For a long time, I stare at him, internally debating whether I should invite him up to my apartment so we can talk or whether I should just end it here. We’ve said goodbye a couple times, but somehow, we keep finding our way back to each other.
“Would you like to come upstairs for a few minutes?” I ask, nervously breaking our stare.
“Yes.” Even though I’m not looking at him, I hear the smile in his voice—the relief.
Without another word, I lead the way, unlocking the front door and starting up the stairs. He walks close behind me, his arm brushing my leg at one point right before we reach my floor.
“Have you been drinking?” he asks, when I sway as we reach my apartment. My head spins from standing too long, and I have no choice but to brace myself against the wall.
“Just a little bit.”
He slips the key from between my fingers and unlocks the door, holding it open as I stumble inside. Wrapping his arm around my back, he guides me to the couch, carefully helping me down.
I watch as he slips off my heels and walks to the small kitchen to grab me a bottle of water from the fridge. “Drink this,” he says, as he takes a seat next to me. Having a man near me reminds me of what Robyn is probably doing right now, and I giggle uncontrollably.
“What’s so funny?” he asks.
“I was just thinking about something.”
“Care to share?”
I shake my head. “It’s a girl thing.”
Seconds of silence fill the space between us. I’m drunk enough to have lost some of my inhibitions, but not drunk enough to lose all sense of control.
“Why are you here, River?”
“I wanted to see how you’re doing,” he whispers. I feel his eyes on me, but I focus on the blank wall ahead. Time hasn’t allowed me to do much with the place. “And I miss you.”
“I don’t want you to miss me.”
“Why not?”
“Because it will give me an excuse to miss you when all I want to do is forget you,” I admit.
My lack of inhibitions just hit him like a smack across the face. “Is that really what you want?” he asks, brushing his fingers through my hair. “Or do you feel like you have to?”
That magnetic attraction I felt all those weeks ago is still there. Everything that’s happened hasn’t lessened that one bit.
“I’ve read your letter over and over, but it doesn’t negate the fact that everything between us started with a lie. That’s not a solid foundation for a friendship, for a relationship, or for anything.”
“If I would have known you were the one who would change my life, I…” He pauses, scrubbing his hands over his face. “Fuck, Marley. I was screwed no matter what I did. If I’d told you the truth right away, we never would have happened. I was sure I was going to go my whole life without really wanting anyone, but that changed the minute you walked into your office that morning. Even if it was just once, I had to have you, but you’re not the type of woman a man has a one-night stand with. He becomes obsessed—addicted maybe. Then he tries again because he’s never felt anything like it, only to find he wants even more. I thought it was just an obsession, but I’m learning that’s what love is.”
“We would have never worked, River. We’re two different people with very different goals.”
“It would if you supported mine, and I supported yours.”
Looking over, I take in a serious River Holtz. He’s changed some over the last several weeks. “Maybe if we’d met at another time under different circumstances.”
He shakes his head. “I can’t accept that, Marley. I can’t get you out of my head.”
“You need to. I’m grateful for what you did for me. For showing me who Cole really is. For … ever
ything you’ve shown me, but we have to move on.”
With a few sentences, I’ve completely deflated him. What he doesn’t know—what I won’t tell him—is that it hurt me just as much to say each word. River showed me a passion that I don’t think can ever be met. Another man can try to recreate it, but that’s all he’ll do. He’ll never be River.
“Is there anything I can do to change that?” he asks, staring into my eyes.
“Is there anything you can do to change the past?”
Sad.
Defeated.
Broken.
I see all of it on his face. I feel it all of it in my heart. It’s like a sad, twisted fairytale about two people who have feelings for each other, but can’t be together because of circumstance—our own brand of forbidden romance. I’ve never known of anything good that came from a lie.
“Is this just another goodbye then?” he asks me.
“I guess it is,” I answer, tears welling.
Before I know what’s happening, he leans in to kiss my cheek—kissing my tears away. He lingers there long enough that my resolve starts slipping, but he pulls away before it completely falls from between my fingers, pressing his forehead to mine. “If you need anything, you can call me.”
I close my eyes as his breath hits my lips. “I hope you find someone who deserves you.”
“I need to go,” he says.
I want so badly to kiss those lips, but it would go against everything I just said. When he pulls away, I feel empty. I’m lost between telling him I’ve changed my mind, and just letting him go.
Following him to the door, I push that away and prepare myself to watch him walk away one last time.
“The new club opens late next month. If you ever get a chance, you should come see it,” he says with his hand wrapped around the doorknob.
I nod, anxiously. “Maybe.”
He looks at the door, then back to me. “Goodbye, beautiful.”
And before I have a chance to react, he’s gone.
LIFE HAS CHALLENGED ME the last few weeks. The District Attorney’s office called me the morning after River left my apartment and told me that while I was a very qualified candidate, they’d selected someone else for the position. I struggled for a few days because yet another dream had been ripped away from me, but then I saw an ad with a non-profit that assists abused women. I applied, and they called me the next day. Some of the things you hear there are tough, but I love the fulfillment I get from helping them. Things happen for a reason; I’m really starting to believe that now.
