The heady sensation of floating too close to heaven dragged me even closer. I waited for her to stop me. God, she needed to stop me, because I was quickly losing control. When she didn’t, I eased closer. Sliding my tongue along her lower lip, I teased her mouth open. She caught herself, both hands on my shoulders, whimpering when I plunged inside. Then my world turned upside down. I went from gentle to rough the second she touched her tongue to mine.
So fucking sweet, this woman.
I was on my feet and walking her backward to the wall before I knew what I was doing. Though she was tall, I needed better access to her mouth, her skin. Gripping her thighs, I lifted her off the floor, pressing my body flush to hers. Her knees hooked around my hips. With a quick perusal of her face, her desire matched mine. I wasn’t alone in this.
Thank fuck, because it might have destroyed me if I’d been wrong.
Her hand in my hair, grazing my scalp, told me I wasn’t.
I crashed my mouth against hers again, swallowing the whimpering moan that crawled up her throat. I cradled the back of her head, holding her at the perfect angle for my mouth to take her deeper. She didn’t protest, but I kept my hand on her thigh, clenching tight.
Skimming away from her mouth, I skated down her jaw, tasting with tongue and teeth, groaning when I finally had my lips on the silk of her slender neck.
“Taste so good,” I breathed against her skin. “Fuck, Nadya.”
She moaned when I lapped at the pulse at her throat, rocking her hips forward. I hissed in a breath, clutching her thigh tighter to keep her still. She wasn’t ready for that. She wasn’t ready for me. Hell, I didn’t know if I could keep my raging sexual need on a leash if she gave herself to me. I didn’t trust myself. Not with her and not after what she’d been through.
But I wanted her. God help me, I wanted her with a feral craving that threatened to tell me to go fuck myself, toss caution to the stormy wind, and just take her. My hand at her head fisted in her hair, arching her throat more. She cried out a little, sounding somewhere between pained, surprised, and pleasured. I had to stop before I fell over the edge.
Lisabette had mind-fucked me so hard. Her darkness had filled me, possessed me, made me into her creature of sadistic pleasure. Disgusting memories haunted me too often. Shame coated my soul like a black river and all I could think right now was how bad I wanted to drag this sweet angel into her bed and make her as dirty as me.
Goddamn. It wasn’t what Lisabette had done to my body that filled me with unending rage. It was what she’d done to my mind. I had to stop.
Sliding back to her mouth for one more delicious taste, I sucked her tongue into my mouth before easing down, nipping her plump kiss-swollen bottom lip. Forcing my muscles to unclench and ease up, I hauled my body away from hers, I let her slide back to the floor. Dipping my chin low, I closed my eyes and focused on steadying my breath.
She panted as fast as I was, her hummingbird heart beating like mad. Her gentle hands cupped my jaw. “Uriel.”
I couldn’t open my eyes and see anything close to regret in her eyes. It would crush me. Kill me quicker than any demon king.
“Uriel.”
Summoning courage, I opened them, shocked to see her glass-blue eyes glistening with…hope? Her expression soft and open.
“God, Nadya.”
Then she smiled, and my heart dropped into my stomach.
“Nadya!” A man’s voice echoed from outside, knocking us both out of our passion-hazed stupor.
We both jerked our heads toward the small window in her bedroom. She pulled out of my arms and rushed to it. I followed.
“Nadya!” came the muffled male voice in the night.
There was no light to show us whose shadow hovered across the road, but I knew who it was.
“Skaal,” she whispered, turning and rushing out the door.
He couldn’t get past the wards without one of us letting him in. Stretching my wings and blowing out a breath, I took a moment to get my head straight. But something told me this had nothing to do with my head at all. This was all the doing of another organ pumping like mad beneath my rib cage.
I was so far gone. And I wasn’t sure I ever wanted to come back.
Chapter Sixteen
Nadya
Skaal had the worst timing. I needed five more minutes with Uriel to find out what he was thinking. What he felt. That kiss was more than a kiss. It was a breach of walls, for both of us. I’d never expected to feel that way again. Had I ever felt desire like that before?
No. Never.
I rushed out without a cloak, the icy wind penetrating through my thin layer of clothes. Shaking, but not from the cold, I noted the fury shining in Skaal’s eyes and the rigid square of his clenched jaw as I walked across the wards, slowing my steps.
“What is it?”
“Inside,” he growled, grabbing my hand and pulling me toward the cottage.
I’d not seen him this angry before. Skaal was typically composed, more controlled even when moved to anger. But something had him on the verge of screaming, it seemed. Once inside, he slammed the door and rounded on me, hands on his hips, taking in my skin-tight attire.
“What the hell are you thinking?” he growled.
“What are you talking about?”
“Nadya. Are you kidding me with this?” He gestured to my body or clothes or both.
Crossing my arms, I scowled. “I had to fit in to go to Yorick’s.”
He grunted in disgust. “That’s what I’m talking about! You shouldn’t have been at Yorick’s. Do you honestly believe this disguise will hide you if the wrong person catches you there? Someone from Vladek’s court?”
“I had no choice.”
“What are you fucking talking about?” he gritted out between clenched teeth. His eyes, usually cool gray, now glowed demon-red. “I didn’t agree to help him to put you back into harm’s way.”
“It’s not your choice.” Adrenaline hummed through my veins. “I wanted to help him.” Licking my lips, I whispered, “I need to.”
Skaal inched closer, his scowl deepening. “What the hell does that mean?”
Fury practically vibrated off of his skin. I could see the reason behind it shifting from my safety to another reason altogether. Jealousy. I’d like to tell him there was nothing to be jealous of, but that would be a lie. There was everything to be jealous of. Within a very short time, Uriel had become more to me than anyone else in this godforsaken world. Enough that I was willing to go where I swore I’d never go again. To risk my own safety for him.
At that moment, the man in question sauntered out from my bedroom, still in his blood-spattered tunic, his eyes glowing supernatural blue. Slowly, he made his way to us, standing just behind me.
“What’s the problem?” he asked Skaal, arms casually at his sides even though tension vibrated in the air.
“This wasn’t the deal,” he growled, focused entirely on Uriel. “You were supposed to get Axel or someone else to escort you there.”
“Axel said no. If you can imagine, I don’t have an arsenal of demon friends to play the part.”
“But she”—Skaal jabbed a finger in my direction, keeping his eyes on Uriel—“shouldn’t be anywhere near those fucking fighting pits.”
“She’s a grown woman. She can make her own decisions.”
A zing of pride swept through me at his words. Lisabette had babied me my whole life. Then she’d led me to be caged by Vladek, and he became my slave master, telling me what I could and could not do. My grandmother had been the only one to encourage me to be myself, to do what I wanted to do. Her death had made my confidence waver, which is how easily I’d been swept back into Lisabette’s web. But it was my decision to find a way to escape my imprisonment, to live as far away from the battleground cities of this war, to find a way to help those trying to mak
e a life for themselves in this mess of a world. And it was my decision to step back into the fray…with Uriel.
Skaal shook his head, still pinning Uriel with unhidden violence. “You have no idea what you’re forcing her to risk.”
Uriel took two swift steps toward Skaal, his left wing pressed tightly against my back, embracing me.
“Oh, I think I know far better than you what she risks.” His honeyed baritone was smooth and even, but the tightening of his jaw and the tension in his ramrod straight spine and shoulders told me he was anything but calm.
Skaal remained rigid, unwilling to back down. This stand-off wasn’t just about my safety.
I stepped closer and wrapped a hand around Uriel’s wrist, pressing my other against his abdomen to back him up.
“It’s okay.” Uriel stared down at me, the fierceness sliding away the longer he did. “Let me talk to him.”
Uriel blinked heavily before brushing the backs of his knuckles against my jaw, then he turned away and returned to my bedroom. He could’ve just had a seat in the den to give us privacy. He went to my bedroom to make something very clear to Skaal. I should’ve been angry that he’d flaunt his position in front of Skaal, but his not-so-subtle claim on me had my heart skittering with joy instead.
Finally turning back to Skaal, it was apparent he got the message loud and clear. My heart squeezed as the realization dawned. Then he took a closer look at my lips and my neck, which I knew would show signs of thorough kissing. My pale skin always flushed so easily when brushed against something. Uriel’s repeated attentions would certainly be showing up on my throat.
He hung his head and closed his eyes with a scoff. “I see.”
“Skaal.” I gripped his arm, trying to get him to look at me. “You have been the truest friend. I-I wouldn’t even be free if it weren’t for you.”
“But I still wasn’t enough, was I?”
“I care for you deeply. As a friend.”
He nodded, not meeting my eyes, and walked to the door. I followed him, though I had no idea what to say. How do you say goodbye gently to someone who risked their life to save yours, who obviously loved you deeply, but who you couldn’t make yourself love back and never would?
“I’m sorry, Skaal,” I whispered, standing on the doorstep with my arms crossed.
He turned and finally met my eyes, exhaling a heavy sigh. “I know you are,” he said with a sad smile. “I knew it would never be me, but I…” He glanced toward the cottage and bit his bottom lip.
“But you what?”
“It just digs the dagger deeper that it’s him. An archangel. I never stood a chance.”
The light from the doorway gilded his perfect features, reminding me that he’d once been an angel himself. Now fallen, he thought himself lower or lesser than he once was. That hurt me even more.
“Skaal,” I said gently, touching his arm. “You are the most selfless demon I know.”
He laughed, his breath forming white puffs in the cold. “Some high demon I am, aren’t I?”
“You’re wonderful,” I said honestly. “And that’s the truth.”
“Oh, Nadya.” He tucked a stray strand of hair behind my ear. “You’ve always thought too much of me. Yes, I got you out of that hellhole, but it’s only because I loved you too much to see him torture you any longer. I’d always hoped you’d choose me once you were ready. Not so selfless, really.”
“But you could’ve been caught, you could’ve died or even worse if he’d found you out. And you did it anyway.”
He could say what he wanted, but it was a risk he didn’t have to take. Even if he was motivated because he’d wanted me to be his.
“It guts me, Nadya, to think of—” He looked back toward the door. “But it makes sense. You were always filled with too much good for our world. Still…be careful, okay?”
“With what?”
“With him.” He gestured with a nod. “He may be an archangel, but he was held for a long time by Vladek and Lisabette. There may still be darkness inside him.”
“I imagine there is.” I understood that all too well. “Because there’s still some inside me, too.”
I wouldn’t elaborate or explain the violent thoughts and urges that still swept over me since my time in Ivangorod. Skaal held my gaze for a few seconds more then marched off toward the border of wards.
“Be ready at sunset in two days. You go to Zigor’s pit next.”
“Zigor? Where is he high demon?”
“Budapest!”
He strode across the road then disappeared with a crackling snap of power. After reentering the cottage, I closed the door and stepped quietly toward the bedroom. Hearing the shower running in the bathroom with the door halfway open, I heaved out a breath of relief.
Not sure why, because there was nothing more I’d rather see than that beautiful archangel under the shower in my bathroom. My nerves were frazzled after that conversation with Skaal. And I had to tell Uriel who I’d seen back in the theater tonight.
“Nadya,” he bellowed, as if he knew I was standing right there in the middle of my bedroom.
Edging close to the door, but not looking inside, I asked, “Yes?”
“Will you go to your back door and bring me the duffle bag sitting beside the pile of firewood?”
Duffle bag?
I walked back through the cottage and checked outside, finding a black bag right where he said. Picking it up, I carried it back inside and into my room, set it on my bed, and unzipped it.
“I knew I’d need a change of clothes,” he said from right behind me.
I flinched, afraid to turn around. I hadn’t noticed that the faucet had turned off or that he’d stepped up so close. But I could definitely feel the heat of him at my back.
“I’m afraid I’m dripping on your floor. Would you help me?”
He held out a towel at my side. I turned, seeing that his wings were indeed dripping on the wood floor. But I could hardly drag my stunned gaze from the rest of him.
Uriel in his black garb was striking. Uriel in his plated armor was magnificent. But Uriel in nothing but a white towel wrapped around his waist and beads of water covering his perfectly sculpted and bronzed chest was utterly devastating.
Rather than smirk or smile at my obvious shock and awe, he dipped his head lower and spoke softly. “My wings, Nadya. Would you dry them?”
Clearing my throat, I nodded. “Of course.”
Stepping behind him, because I didn’t want him to see the blush that heated my neck and cheeks, I started on the arch and swept down over the side. His feathers hadn’t soaked up the water, but it beaded and rolled, dripping down onto the floor.
“What did you tell Skaal?” His voice was husky, his head bent forward, his wet hair hanging to hide his face. “He went away without much argument, it seems.”
“Um, it wasn’t about—I mean, he understood why I was doing this.”
Finishing with one wing, I started on the other. He let out a soft groan before asking, “What was it that he understood exactly?”
I didn’t know how to answer him. I never shied away from the truth, and there’s one thing I knew about Uriel. He expected only the truth.
Circling around to his front, I dragged the damp towel along the inner arch. He flexed his wing. I lost my balance and braced myself on his shoulder.
“Tell me,” he urged again more softly.
His presence, especially nearly naked, was overwhelming, beguiling. I was beginning to wonder if he was the witch because in a very short time, I’d become completely entranced by him.
No. That was wrong. It had been much longer than that. It was when I’d first seen him, chained to Lisabette’s side, beaten and bruised, but completely and wholly unbroken. It was always there, the fire in his eyes. The strength he held on to despite everything that
had lured me to him long before now.
“He realized,” I started, tucking the towel against my chest, still holding on to his shoulder. “That you mean something to me. That it didn’t matter what protests he made, because I was going to take the risk no matter what…for you.”
He lifted my hand on his shoulder and brought my palm to his mouth where he pressed a warm kiss.
“I won’t let any harm come to you. You know that, right?”
I nodded, hardly able to answer when he swept another kiss to my palm, his mouth partly open, the heat rushing from the center of my palm up my arm to my chest and down to lower regions.
“Tell me you know that.” He’d inched closer, his bare chest brushing the back of my hand where I clutched the towel to me. “Tell me you know that I’ll keep you from harm.”
There was something desperate in his gaze. That’s when I realized he needed my confidence in him. He’d managed to get caught and was held prisoner in the most humiliating of ways, an archangel descended to a slave for a demon witch.
“I know you will.” I pulled my hand away from his mouth but kept hold of his hand. “I trust you.”
The crackling tension was too much. I might want more with this archangel, but I wasn’t sure I’d be able to bare all to him. The strength in this unbelievably beautiful archangel was enough to make me cry and make me more ashamed of the secrets I still kept from him.
Giving his hand one more squeeze, I dropped it and stepped out of the lovely warmth of his embrace.
“I’ll make us some tea. Get dressed and come sit with me. I have something I need to tell you.”
He didn’t stop me and make demands as some men might. Like many had done throughout my life. He nodded and let me go, reaching over to his bag to do as I’d asked. It was a small thing, but a wonderful one. To have a man listen to my wishes and obey me for once.
Desire flared as I wondered what it might be like if he obeyed me in other ways…in my bed. And that was the moment I knew for certain. I’d have to tell him one shameful secret in particular if I was ever going to find out.
Coldest Fire (Dominion series) Page 14
