I was surprised to hear her abandon her shyness when it came to food. This seemed to be something that she was excited about. I was glad to find something that made her feel in control. After the two nights heated activities, I could tell that she was a little hesitant. I wanted to put her in the driver’s seat this time. I wanted her to know that I liked it when a woman took charge. It’s fucking hot. Don’t misunderstand me; I have every intention of showering Amber with every ounce of attention I have. I wanted to make her know that she was the only person I had ever wanted to be with, but I also wanted her to know that I couldn’t resist a woman who was confident in herself. A woman who knew what she wanted and wasn’t afraid to take it. So far she was proving to be everything I had thought she would be.
When we arrived, I walked around to the passenger side and opened Amber’s door. She took my hand as I helped her step down from the high seats. As we walked into the restaurant, I couldn't help but put my hand on the small of her back and she led us in.
“Hi, Luis!” she called to the man behind the counter.
“Hola, Amber! Back so soon?!” A short statured man stepped from around the counter to greet Amber. He pulled her in for a hug and kissed her on the cheek.
“You know I can’t resist your food!” Amber laughed.
“Ah! Y quién es el hombre?” And who is this man? he whispered to her while looking directly at me. A protective friend, I could tell.
“Hola, soy Tobie. Mucho gusto, usted.” I’m Tobie. It’s nice to meet you. I introduced myself, reaching my hand out to shake Luis’s. He laughed and took my hand in both of his, shaking vigorously. Amber smiled.
“Please, please! Come sit! What can I get for you?” Luis welcomed us both. He ushered us to a corner booth right next to the kitchen. Amber ordered off menu and I asked Luis to make me whatever his favorite dish was. This seemed to please him immensely. He scurried back into the kitchen, barking orders at the cooks.
“I forgot that you speak Spanish,” Amber giggled as soon as Luis had left.
“Summers on construction sites will teach you lots of things,” I joked. “I didn’t realize you spoke it, though”.
“A few years of high school Spanish followed by a few mission trips here and there.” She humbled. “Mostly just conversational. Nothing impressive.”
“You don’t give yourself enough credit.”
A few minutes later, Luis presented our plates with such fanfare that you would have thought we were royalty. And while the food was fantastic, but it was nothing in comparison to time spent with Amber. I had always known that she was a rare find, but to actually sit and have a conversation with her was everything I had hoped it would be. I was truly disappointed that we only had her lunch time together.
“You make this really easy, Amber.”
She laughed. “What is that supposed to mean!?”
“I mean it’s easy to be with you. It was the same way at the coffee shop, too. I’m not even having to try here. I love talking with you. I love hearing all about your work. Your life. I want to know everything there is to know about you.”
“I have to admit, I was a little nervous about having lunch together, but I’ve really enjoyed this. I would have never imagined this happening, but I’m glad it has.”
I smiled warmly at her and placed my hand on the table, reaching for hers. Without hesitation, she reached back and placed her delicate fingers in mine. Her hand was warm and soft. I brushed my thumb against her skin just as I had a few nights ago when I confessed how I felt about her.
“I feel like there are probably some things we need to talk about, though.” She spoke softly, looking down at her half eaten plate.
“I know,” I squeezed her hand gently. She looked back up at me. “Amber, I want you to know that this isn’t just some silly fling or conquest or some shit like that. I really like you. I’ve liked you for a long time.”
“See, that’s what I don’t get. Why in the world would you be interested in me? I’m ten years older than you. Isn’t there someone closer to your age that you’re interested in?”
“Nope.” I know it sounded like a stupid simple answer, but it was true. There wasn’t anyone - younger or older - that interested me as much as Amber did.
“Well, I guess that settles it then.” She laughed and rolled her eyes.
“Seriously, Amber. When I look at you I don’t see someone who is ten years older than me. I see a smart, funny, caring, beautiful woman. I see someone I want to know everything there is to know about. I’ve never known someone as captivating as you.”
I stopped for a moment because her eyes were welling up. I didn’t want her to cry. I just wanted her to know how I felt. I continued to hold her hand in mine. I didn’t ever want to let go of her.
“Look, I get that I dropped a bit of a bomb on you. I’ve felt this way for years but I know it’s new for you. I’m assuming you’d never entertained the same feelings about me, which makes me want to prove to you even more that I’m not the same scrawny, nervous kid that followed Hannah around all the time. I want to prove to you that I’m worthy of your time. And I’m willing to give you however long it will take for you to see that. Because I want you to want this, too.”
Amber was quiet for a few minutes. Luis kept popping his head around the corner to check on her, his face drawn tight in worry, but he never actually came to the table. I kept my attention on Amber while she worked through whatever was going on in her head. It was killing me to know what she was thinking, but I didn’t want to pressure her. After what seemed like an eternity, she finally spoke.
“I believe what you’re telling me, Tobie. I really do.” She spoke softly as if she were holding back a flood of emotion. “It’s just that it’s hard for me to wrap my mind around everything that is happening. It’s like, if I had just met you for the first time at the carwash, I wouldn’t be confused at all. But because I’ve only ever known you as Hannah’s best friend, it’s hard for me to separate the two versions of you that I know now.”
“What do you mean by that?” I questioned.
“Which part?” she sniffed.
“The part where you said that if you had met me for the first time at the carwash you wouldn’t be confused at all.”
Amber laughed through her misty eyes. “I don’t know… I mean… good grief, this is kinda embarrassing.”
“Embarrassing? Well, now I really want to know what you meant.” I was happy to see her smiling again.
“Like… if I had just met you as you… are now.” She gestured at my chest with her free hand.
“Oh, I see.” I smirked, “So if you had just met me for the amazing male specimen that I’ve become you’d have no issues pledging your everlasting love to me. I get it.”
Amber started laughing loudly.
“No, no, really. I understand.” I held my hands up in defense. “It happens a lot, you know. Girls see these amazing abs and the panties start dropping.”
“Good Lord, Tobie!” Amber shrieked. Luis immediately appeared from around the corner, ready to pounce. When he saw Amber laughing and smiling, his demeanor shifted back to a relaxed state. He smiled and nodded his head toward me and went back into the kitchen.
“Amber, I’m glad you told me how you’re feeling. I was serious when I told you I will do everything in my power to give you the attention you deserve. I am well aware of the risk we run by being together. It scares the shit out of me to know how Hannah would react to all of this. I haven’t quite figured out how to handle that yet, so for now I think it’s best that we figure out what all this is before we tell her.”
“I agree,” Amber nodded. “I think it would be foolish to tell her yet. I’d never want to be the one to mess up your friendship.”
“Ok, so that issue is settled. Can I ask you about something else?”
“Of course,” her voice was calm but I could see the apprehension in her eyes.
“The ‘No Sex’ rule. Can you explain that for me?
I don’t want to assume anything or try to play guessing games.”
Amber took in a deep breath and let it out slowly. Luis’s worried face appeared from around the corner again. God, bless that man.
“A few years ago I dated a guy who I ended up being too intimate with too quickly. I hadn’t ever really thought of the magnitude of effect that sex can have on a relationship - good and bad. I was really hoping that we would get married and start a family and all that, but he wouldn’t ever commit to anything related to a future together.” She paused for a moment. I squeezed her hand to assure her that I was still with her and encourage her to continue.
“When we broke up, I took the time to really look back and analyze the relationship. What I saw were two people who didn’t really share anything in common other than sex. We had different visions for our lives but weren’t ever really able to see that because we had become so clouded by the physical aspect of the relationship. I regret not having taken the time to really get to know him before we took that step. I don’t want make the same mistake again.
“I know this is a lot to put out there, Tobie, but if you are serious about being with me I want you to know where I stand. I’m not sitting here trying to claim to be a ‘born-again-virgin’ or anything and obviously you are aware that other activities are still on the table,” she flashed a bashful smile at me and I laughed, “but I’m not going to be having sex with anyone who isn’t my husband. So if that’s what you’re looking for or expecting from this than I’m sorry to disappoint you.”
I couldn’t help it. I started laughing.
“What the hell are you laughing about!?” she fumed. There was Luis again. Except he looked pissed instead of worried but still wasn’t coming out of the kitchen.
“You!” I cried out. “I’m laughing that you would think that I’m only in this for sex. Amber, I don’t know how much more plainly I can tell you that I am attracted to you. And yes, your body is fucking hot, but that’s not all I’m interested in. I’m interested in what makes you tick. What makes you laugh, what makes you angry. I want to know everything there is to know about you. And I want you to know the same things about me. I’m not looking for a fling or anything. I want you.”
Amber’s eyes welled up again. This time I could tell that they are happy tears. She smiled at me and squeezed my hand tightly, “Ok, Tobie, ok. I believe you… even if what you are telling me is unbelievable.”
“Good.” I raised her hand up and kiss the backs of her knuckles. “Now. Is there anything else we need to talk about?”
“Yes,” she grinned though her teary eyes, “the flan here is amazing. You must try it.”
I leaned across the table and placed a soft kiss on her mouth. Luis appeared at the table in the time it takes a heart to beat twice. “Can I get you two anything else?”
“Luis, this beautiful woman tells me that the flan here is amazing.”
He beamed when he saw sees that Amber was ok. “One flan, coming up!”
The rest of the meal went effortlessly after the air had been cleared. I was flattered that Amber had invited me to a place that she felt so comfortable in and hoped that I had made a good impression on Luis.
After we had completely cleaned our plates, he came out again to make sure that the meal was good and ask if we needed anything else.
“Everything was amazing, Luis. Thank you. I’m so glad Amber brought me here. I think all I need now is the check so I can get this lovely lady back to work.”
“Oh, no, señor. Your meal is on the house. It was my pleasure.” Luis placed his hand on Amber’s shoulder and leaned in to her ear. “El es un buen hombre.” He’s a good man.
“I think I’m beginning to agree with you, Luis.” Amber whispered back, loud enough for me to hear.
Chapter Sixteen
Amber
Lunch went a lot longer than I had anticipated. Time spent with Tobie passed by much too quickly. An hour and a half at the restaurant followed by a thirty minute window-steaming makeout session in the parking lot meant that I had to sneak back to my desk without my boss noticing. I got to my cubicle, thankful that Jim wasn’t in his office at that exact moment. I placed my purse in the bottom drawer of my filing cabinet and wiggled my mouse to bring my computer back to life.
“I was beginning to think you were going to skip out on the rest of the day.” Sarah’s voice came from behind me. Caught. I turned around to see her standing in the entry of my cube. She grabbed the spare chair I keep tucked in the corner and plopped down. She crossed her arms over her chest and raised her eyebrows at me.
“Why are you looking at me like that?” I tried to play dumb.
“Don’t gimme that. You know damn well, why.” She scolded me. “I saw you walk out to a truck holding hands with a drop dead gorgeous man two hours ago. Your face is all flustered and your lips are all puffy. So spill the details, lady.” There was no getting out of this conversation without giving her some fat to chew on.
I rolled my eyes. “Alright, fine. He’s an old friend. He just came back into town last week. He asked me if I’d like to get lunch and catch up. So we did.”
“And then you made out like teenagers in his truck? I don’t think so. Nice try, but there’s more to this story. Out with it.”
I laughed. As much as she was irritating me at the moment, I was still on cloud nine from spending time with Tobie. I usually wasn’t one to kiss-and-tell, but Sarah was my best friend and I desperately wanted to tell someone. Especially since now I felt much more confident about what was happening.
“Ok, ok! He really is an old friend. We ran into each other last week at the car wash…” I should probably censor some of this, “and started talking here and there.”
Sarah’s eyes were glued to me. “And…??”
“And… we may have gone out a few times and had a few moments of intense… uh… making out.” I giggled. Did I really just giggle? What is happening to me?!
“Just making out?” She pressed.
“Yes. Just making out. Come on, Sarah. You know my position on that subject.”
“Ok, ok. So how long have you known this guy?”
“Oh, wow… um… like seven or eight years, I guess.”
“And you know him how…?”
“He’s... a really good friend of the family.”
“Mm, hm.” Sarah began to connect some dots. “So he probably knows your sister, too?” I nod my head. “And that’s why it could end up being a messy situation?”
“Yes, exactly. So he and I are trying to figure out what all this is before we alert the presses.”
“Ok, I get it. That makes sense.” Sarah got up from the spare chair and made her way back to her cubicle. “So what’s hottie’s name? I could see that tight ass from all the way up here!”
Wait for it…. “Tobie.”
Sarah let out a gasp so loud that the entire office was instantly aware of our existence. She slapped her hand over her mouth as if she could catch the sound and stuff it back into her mouth.
“Tobie!?” she hissed at me. I could feel the heat in my face turning it bright crimson. “Your sister’s best friend, Tobie!?” Her eyes looked like they might pop out of her head.
“Oh, Amber!” she was starting to calm down, and sat back down in the spare chair. “Are you sure about this? I mean, after seeing him even from a distance in the parking lot, I get the appeal, but geez… this could go really, really badly.”
“Yes, thank you for that reminder, Sarah. I am well aware of the magnitude of this situation. But, honestly, I think I really like him. I hadn’t ever thought of him as more than Hannah’s friend before, but he’s really grown up. He’s actually a really amazing person. And good gravy, Sarah. He’s freakin’ hot! And he’s definitely interested in me.”
Sarah was still in shock. I hadn’t ever seen her legitimately speechless in the five years I’d known her. She pulled in a deep sigh and shook her head. “So what do you think Hannah is going to say abou
t this?”
“That’s the million dollar question. There’s really only two ways this can go: She’ll either be happy for us, or seriously pissed.”
“Yeah. Not to be downer or anything, but if I found out that my sister was sneaking around my back with my best friend, I’ll be pissed. At both of you.”
“I know. I think I would be, too.”
Knowing that Hannah could be hurt or angry at me and Tobie was enough to make me sick to my stomach. I’d never forgive myself if I was the reason that their friendship went down in flames.
“But what am I supposed to do? This is the first time in a very long time that I’ve had feelings for someone. I know the right thing to do would be to put a stop to all of this but my heart won’t let me. I feel like I owe it to myself to at least explore what these feelings mean.”
I pause to let my words soak in. Before saying them out loud, I hadn’t even considered the possibility that I was having real feelings for Tobie. Sarah just continued to stare at me. I was beginning to think that maybe she’d had a stroke.
“Sarah, are you ok!?”
Her eyes opened and closed in a very dramatic blink. “Yeah, I’m just shocked. I’ve always known you to be so calculated. It’s bizzare to see you considering something that comes with such a risk.”
“Yeah. I’m having the same issue. I’ve felt so… off balance… since all of this started. I don’t know what to do, Sarah. This is all so… delicate.”
Sarah let out another long sigh. “Do you want my advice?”
“Yes, it’d be nice to have an outsider’s perspective.”
“You’d better know for damn sure if he’s the one before you tell Hannah. Because if you guys get all hot and heavy and then break up, things are never going to be the same for her and Tobie. She’d be angry with him for hurting her sister or you for hurting her best friend. You’re exactly right. This is extremely delicate. There’s a lot on the line here.”
Delicate (Sublime Series Book 1) Page 10
