“Oh my gosh!” A female voice squealed then a girl with multi-colored hair and heavy eye makeup pulled Katie out of his grasp. “I never expected to see you here.” The girl stumbled slightly on her platform shoes while giving Katie a playful smile.
“Hey,” she said in surprise. “How did you get invited?” Katie asked.
The girl smirked and said with a gangster accent, “I know people.” He watched as both girls burst into laughter. “Actually, I was invited by a guy I met at The Coffee Pot while I was working yesterday.” She huffed, but she was still smiling. “But he disappeared on me right after a tall skinny blonde asked him to dance.” She rolled her eyes and said, “Bitch,” under her breath.
He was waiting to be introduced when Alexis pushed through the crowd with a scowl on her face. This night wasn’t going to end well. “I. Hate. Men.” Alexis growled. She didn’t look like she was in any mood to explain what happened with her date, but he didn’t think he would need one.
“Then you’ve come to the right place,” the girl said with false cheerfulness.
Katie giggled and made introductions. “Alexis and Tyler, I’d like you to meet my friend Kami. Jason hired her a few weeks ago. Kami, this is my roommate Alexis and my friend Tyler.”
Kami stumbled again when she pulled Alexis into an awkward hug. “I’ve heard so much about you.” Alexis held a goofy grin and was on the verge of laughter when Kami turned to him and practically jumped into his arms. “You too.” With her face so close to his, he could smell why she was so friendly. She might not have been drunk, but she was probably on her way.
She rambled on. “She can’t shut up about you. It’s Tyler this or Tyler that.” He couldn’t help smile. He liked…no, more than liked that Katie talked about him. He took a sip of his drink, hoping it would somehow block the constant guilt he felt every time he thought of her as more than a friend.
Kami took Alexis’s hand. “I say we should get out there and dance. We don’t need guys to have fun.” Alexis didn’t have time to respond. Kami was pulling her toward the middle of the room. Alexis looked back at them shaking her head. “I like her,” she mouthed then took Katie’s hand, dragging her onto the dance floor.
Tyler didn’t join them but kept a watchful eye. The three of them together received a lot of stares. Alexis wasn’t as graceful on the dance floor as she was on a runway, but that might have been because of the drinks she was downing. Her laugh echoed in the room as she danced on her own while she cheered on Kami and Katie as they dirty danced with each other.
When Kami pressed her body against Katie’s back and gripped her hips as they moved to the music, Katie’s cheeks blushed but Kami whispered something in her ear making her laugh then she nodded her head. Not a moment later, Katie lifted her arms in the air and swayed to the music, while Kami began to run her hands up and down Katie’s body
Tyler loosened his tie as the room began to warm. He looked around noticing the number of men watching them, which did nothing for his blood pressure. He didn’t like the way some of them leered or encouraged them.
He thought he would choke on his drink when Kami cupped Katie’s breasts. He had to swallow the mix of jealousy and lust. Katie tilted her head back and laughed when in return she reached behind her and pinched Kami’s butt. Her smile could have lit up the room and her laugh hit him right in the center of his heart.
A guy, who had been watching the girls, moved behind Kami and with his hands on her hips he joined in the action. Before Tyler could get on the dance floor to break it up, Kami let go of Katie but not before spanking her butt, causing Katie to jump away from her with a giggle.
Katie, thankfully, moved away from the couple to dance with Alexis. The two of them together was a vision of opposites and yet sexy in their own way. When the music switched to a slow song, Alexis began dancing with a guy he had seen her talk to when they first entered the party.
Katie made her way toward him, breathing heavy with sweat dripping down her neck. Her eyes sparkled and her smile softened, he could physically see the stress and the weight of her worries slide right off her shoulders.
“I needed that.” Her breaths came out uneven and she lifted her hair like a curtain to cool off her neck. “I need some fresh air.”
He didn’t hesitate. He put his hand on her lower back and guided her through the throng of people to a side door guarded by two bouncers. They stamped their hands, so they could get back in, then found a quiet spot away from a group of smokers.
“It feels good out here.” It had just rained, so the air still felt wet and the ground had small puddles of water.
He nodded, but he wasn’t thinking about the weather. “You looked like you were having fun in there.”
“Yeah.” She chuckled the sound uncharacteristically low. “Kami asked me to dance with her to get the attention of that guy she traded me in for.” Her laugh deepened.
“It worked. He couldn’t stop staring.” Like every other guy, including him.
“I noticed.” Her cheeks reddened, but he wasn’t sure if it was from the cool breeze or from blushing. “I never imagined it would be sexy to dance with a pregnant woman but...” She spread her arms out like Vanna White and her brow quirked up. “It’s nice to know I’ve still got it.” It never left.
“So.”
“So…” she repeated.
“I didn’t get to hear how your winter break went.” They had talked and texted every day, but it was usually short texts or just a phone call to say “Goodnight and I’ll see you soon.”
She sighed and her shoulders slumped. “It was fine.”
He raised his brows. “Really?”
“Yes and no. It’s always good to see my family.”
“But?” he asked.
Her brows turned in. “Am I that transparent?”
“Yes. Now tell me the rest.”
She leaned against the building with her eyes closed. “You know how I said I was going to spend the day with my group of girlfriends from high school?”
“Yeah.”
She opened her eyes but kept them focused on her feet. “Well, my best friend since preschool Lindy planned a full day for all of us girls. She didn’t tell us ahead of time what we were doing but told us what we should wear. The problem was she didn’t account for this.” She pointed to her belly. “We began the day sledding except I couldn’t, so I sat at the bottom of the hill and made myself the designated photographer.”
She bent down and took off one of her shoes stretching her toes then slid it back on and repeated the process with her other foot. “It sucked not being able to enjoy the fun, but I didn’t want to complain since the day wasn’t about me.
Next we went to a spa and got manicures, pedicures, and massages. That part was great. Who doesn’t love getting pampered?”
“But?” he asked again.
She growled. “But I was in this room with all my friends who I had known since we were little. They were laughing and talking about people I didn’t know and things they had done together. Most of them had stayed in Flagstaff for school, but a few went to Arizona State, but they see each other all the time.”
She sighed again. “I felt like I had nothing in common with them and it sucked. Really bad. After my massage, I had to use the restroom and when I returned, I overheard Lindy talking about how she originally planned for all of us to go dancing.” She released a deep breath. “But because of my ‘condition’ we were just going to hang out at her parents’ house and watch movies.
So I pretended I didn’t hear them and casually said I had plans to spend the rest of the evening with Mom and Billy.” She looked him in the eyes. “They acted like they were upset, but I could see the sideways glances between them.” She shook her head. “It hurt, but that wasn’t what bothered me. At that moment, it all made sense why mom didn’t have many friends. Girls her age were off being teenagers and women with kids my age were much older. She didn’t really fit anywhere. What she gave up for m
e….”
“Have you talked to her about it?”
“No.”
“I don’t know your mom very well, but I bet she saw her decision as gaining something instead of giving up something. Do you feel like you missed out by not going clubbing with your friends?”
“No,” she said with a half-snort. “I’m not really into that scene or that.” She tilted her head toward the party inside.”
“Does it bother you that it’ll be harder to date now that you’ll have a child…if you keep the baby?”
She shook her head again.
“Hey, guys!” Two female voices giggled from the door. They looked up to see Alexis and Kami holding onto each other and two tall drinks.
“It’s a good thing you work out. You’re going to be carrying those two out of here tonight.” She smirked then took his hand and pulled him back into the party.
“I’ve got it from here. I’ll be out in a few minutes.”
Tyler left Katie with a drunk Alexis lying flat on her back passed out on her bed. He grabbed a bottled water from the kitchen then fell onto the couch to wait for Katie.
Ten minutes later, she slumped down next to him, took the water out of his hand and gulped it until it was empty. “Thanks.” Her voice was tired, but there was humor in it. “Remind me never to go to another party with Alexis.”
“As long as you remind me.”
“Deal.” They shook hands then leaned their heads back at the same time. “It’s late, stay here tonight. This couch pulls out into a super uncomfortable bed.”
“Stop tempting me.” She snorted then got up and left the room, returning a few minutes later with a sheet, blanket, and pillow.
“I guess I’m staying.” She gave him a half-smile. Since he was still slouched on the couch, she bent down and gave him a hug and then went to kiss his cheek but he turned his head and she ended up kissing the edge of his mouth. He sucked in a breath.
“Oh, sorry.” She covered her lips with her fingers and blushed. “Good night.” She rushed out of the room before he could respond.
He leaned forward with his elbows, braced on his knees, and his hands running through his hair. The moment her lips touched his, he wanted to reach out and drag her onto his lap. He wanted to kiss her until she knew exactly how he felt.
“Good night,” he whispered to himself.
Chapter Nineteen
January 2016
Katie
“You should try smiling. You know that thing you do when you lift the corners of your mouth. See!” Kami pointed to Jason’s mouth. “You’re doing it right now. Look in the mirror. You should do that more often.” Kami was teasing, but he did have a great smile…when he used it.
Katie watched the Jason and Kami show from a corner table where she should have been studying while waiting for Alexis and Tracy.
Today was her twenty-week appointment and ultrasound. Alexis had been counting down the days on the calendar while Katie had avoided looking at it.
The bell over the door jingled, drawing their attention. “Oh no. She’s baaaack.” Kami sang under her breath. Jason and Kami held their fists out toward each other. “Rock, paper, scissors” she whispered, and then counted out loud dropping their fists in the palms of their other hand on each count.
“Shit,” Jason muttered.
Kami snickered and moved out of the way so he could take the order from his least favorite customer.
Katie leaned back in her seat, trying to concentrate on the words on the page, but she couldn’t focus. Her thoughts were on her phone call to Phillip’s partner that morning. After she met him and discussed her options as a birth mother, she was confident she was making the right choice by putting the baby up for adoption. They were scheduled to meet again so she could look at a few portfolios of prospective adoptive parents.
A heavy weight settled in the pit of her stomach, a stomach that was expanding daily. She looked down at her belly, still trying to wrap her head around the fact she was pregnant. She was halfway through her pregnancy and it still didn’t feel real. A part of her hoped it was a dream and she would wake up and everything would return to how it used to be. Eric would be alive and she would be a happy college student a third of the way through her sophomore year of college.
Eric. What would he think of her choice? She couldn’t go there. She was already making herself sick with worry, knowing she would have to tell her and his families of her intentions. It had been hard enough to tell Tyler. His voice had dropped and sounded strained when he said he would support whatever decision she made. He even offered to be with her when she told them. She declined. This was something she needed to do on her own. She was a big girl and needed to take responsibility for her choices.
The bell over the door jingled again and in walked Tracy and Alexis. “You ready to get another glimpse of our baby?” Tracy’s words felt like a punch to the chest, forcing all the air out of her lungs and making it difficult to breathe. Katie avoided making eye contact and busily packed up her books and laptop. The guilt of not telling the McHenry’s of her plans was eating at her. She knew she needed to tell…soon.
“Hi, Jason, it’s good to see you,” Tracy gleefully said to the man who looked as pale as the night he kissed Alexis.
“Hello, Mrs. McHenry. It’s always good to see you.” He spoke to her, but his eyes focused on Alexis, who stood near the entrance with her arms folded and her eyes looking everywhere but at him.
The tension between them had been nothing but awkward since Alexis’s birthday party, and she hadn’t been able to get either of them to talk about it. Normally, she would have bugged one or the other until they broke, but she had bigger issues to deal with then her friends acting weird around each other.
She sighed and lifted her bag over her shoulder. “I’m ready.”
Katie laid on the table with her shirt lifted over her belly and the waistband of her leggings under her growing stomach. Phillip held her hand, mindlessly rubbing his thumb over her knuckles. Tracy and Alexis stood near her feet, bouncing with excitement while holding their phones. Alexis was recording the appointment while Tracy had her mother and Billy on Skype.
With her bladder full for the ultrasound, Katie wished the technician would just hurry up and get it over with. With her decision made, she wasn’t interested in drawing this out.
“Before I start, would you like to know the sex?” the technician asked.
“Yes!” several voices said in unison. The technician smiled then looked at her and waited for her reply.
“Yeah. I guess,” she mumbled.
Phillip’s grip on her hand tightened. She looked up at him, and he gave her a loving smile. She hadn’t told him for sure what she had decided, but he knew enough to know she wasn’t excited about this.
With warm jelly on her belly, the technician moved the wand around and right off the bat she said, “Well, she isn’t shy.”
Katie turned her attention to the screen as cheers and squeals echoed in the room. She silently watched as the baby girl wiggle around. Her breath caught in her throat, and it became difficult to swallow.
This was her baby.
This was her daughter.
Tears welled up in her eyes and a mix between a laugh and a cry escaped her lips. Her body shook from the tears as she covered her mouth with her hand, trying to hold back the building emotions.
Phillip wiped at her eyes and ran his hand up and down her arm, wanting to comfort her, but she couldn’t take her eyes off her daughter.
How could she have felt nothing one minute and then everything the next? It was like an emotional damn broke and suddenly she was drowning in love. She wanted to reach out and touch the screen. Outline her daughter’s face with her finger. She looked up at Phillip, who didn’t bother to hide his tears. He was looking at the squirmy little body on the screen with the same soft smile he gave her when she called him dad.
She looked back to the screen and smiled.
She w
as in love with her baby, and she wanted her. She wanted her more than she wanted anything else in her whole life.
“I can do this,” she whispered.
Phillip was the only one who heard her, and he gave her a teary smile. “Yes, you can.”
“I wish I was there,” her mother said through the phone. Katie wished she was too. She smiled at her mom and Billy, who had big alligator tears running down his face. She watched as her mother faced him and kissed him softly and mouthed, “I love you,” before turning back to the screen. “I love you, baby girl.” Billy was too choked up to speak, but the way he rubbed at his chest, she knew what he was feeling.
“I love you…Nana and Papa.” Billy gave her a watery laugh. “I like that.”
As she said goodbye to her mother and Billy, the talkative technician moved the wand around over her belly to take measurements. Once they hung up, the room fell uncomfortably quiet. The happy expression the technician had earlier faded and her brows pinched as she became more focused. Katie was so overwhelmed with emotion she didn’t think anything of it. All she could think about was calling Tyler.
When the technician finished, she wiped the goop off her belly. “Dr. Johnson will look at the ultrasound before she comes in to see you.”
Katie readjusted her clothes then said goodbye to Tracy and Alexis. She asked her dad to wait for her in the exam room while she emptied her bladder.
She stayed in the bathroom a little longer than necessary so she could have some privacy when she called Tyler. Alexis had already sent him and his sisters the ultrasound video and her phone was going crazy with all the incoming text messages, but she ignored them. She wanted to talk to Tyler.
His voicemail picked up, which she knew could happen since he still had several hours left on his twenty-four-hour shift.
After the beep, the words tumbled out of her with a mix of laughter and disbelief. “I’m keeping her, Tyler. I love her. I love her so much I’m not sure my heart can hold all of it. I want to be her mom. I want to raise her. I want to watch her grow up and be there for every milestone. I want to look at her and see parts of Eric and parts of me.” She drew in a deep breath. “God, I want to talk to you so bad. Call me when you get off no matter the time. After my appointment, I’m heading to lunch with Dad, but I’ll keep my phone nearby, and I’m rambling. I’m just so happy. I miss you. Stay safe and I’ll talk to you when you get off work.”
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